Emma Swan stood on a cliff facing Cruella De Vil, as the villain put a gun to the head of Henry Mills, her hands trembling.
"Put your hands down, Savior, we both know you're bluffing!" Cruella sneered.
"That's my son!" Emma said, as her hands started to glow with light magic.
"And you're a hero," Cruella said, "and heroes don't kill!" Emma reacted with a blast of light magic, and Cruella fell off the cliff to her death.
The next thing she knew, Cruella awoke in a strange, twilight zone version of Storybrooke.
Where the devil am I? she thought. It was time to find some answers. She went to what appeared to be Granny's diner.
"Hello?" she asked, "Are you back there, old bat? If you are, I'd like a glass of gin. Maybe then I'll wake up from this nightmare!"
"No gin, I'm afraid," an eerie female voice called. A woman came out, dressed in a tattered dress, with raggedy hair. She appeared to be blind. "But I can make you a mean kid fondue!"
"Who the bloody heck are you?" Cruella asked.
"I'm the Blind Witch," she said. She sniffed. "And you must be Cruella De Vil. I can smell the gin on you."
"Lovely," Cruella said, "Where am I, darling?"
"You don't know?" she asked, "Let's see, how shall I put this? How I got here was because Regina incinerated me with a fireball, and I was burned alive in my own oven. You're in the Underworld. You're dead, dear."
"What?" Cruella asked, in shock, "NO! This can't be! I'll get that Savior if that's the last thing I do!"
"There's nothing more you can do!" the Blind Witch said, "You're trapped here until you take care of whatever unfinished business brought you here, then you move on to a better or worse place. And I can tell, you won't be going anywhere better than this, so I suggest you enjoy yourself!" Cruella left in disgust. As she walked down Main Street, she soon came upon Gold's shop.
Gold may not be here, Cruella thought, but perhaps his shop has something I can use to resurrect me! She went inside, and started snooping around.
"Can I help you?" asked a youthful voice. Cruella turned to see a young boy in a suit similar to Gold's standing before her.
"Who are you, you little brat?" Cruella snapped, "The wannabe owner of this shop? I'm looking for a means to get back to the land of the living."
"What a coincidence!" the boy said, "So am I! Oh, sorry! Where are my manners? Did I forget to introduce myself? I'm Peter, Peter Pan. And I know who you are, Cruella De Vil. You should be grateful you're down here, Cruella. You did not die in vain. Y'see, your death has given my son the means to push the Savior towards darkness."
"Your…son?" Cruella asked, "You mean that little imp is your son?"
"That he is!" Pan said.
"You're the boy from Neverland I've heard about, aren't you?" Cruella asked. "So you want to go back to the real world too, I see? What say you and I work together, darling?"
"Sorry, but I only work with people who have something I want, and you've got nothing," Pan said, "So I suggest you move on…darling, before Hades finds you."
"Who?" Cruella asked.
"Hades," Pan said, "The ruler of the Underworld. He's not a force to be reckoned with. Believe me, I've tried."
"I'm sure I can persuade him to let me go," Cruella said, "I guess I'll have to find my own way home. Ta-ta, darling!"
"Just make sure you don't get tossed into the river of souls, or you'll be lost forever." Pan said.
"What are you talking about?" Cruella asked.
"The river of souls," Pan said, "The water in this place is not ordinary. It's a reservoir that runs deep below this town into the river of souls, where all lost souls are sucked into for eternity, and once you're pulled in, all hope is lost for you, of ever moving on anywhere."
"Thanks for the information, darling," Cruella said, "Oh, and Peter, darling? Should I want to…meet up with an old…friend long dead, where can I go to find them?"
"Take this," Pan said, handing her a vial, "It's known as the ale of Seonaidh from the land of DunBroch. All you must do is pour this liquid over the grave of anyone whose tombstone is still standing, and you can communicate with them."
"Sounds simple enough," Cruella said, "thank you, darling."
"Oh, and I think you'll find your car outside, too." Pan said.
"My, you're being awfully generous." Cruella said.
"Believe me, if I thought you were worth my time, I'd make deals with you, but you're not," Pan said, "Hades, as it turns out, is a big fan of your work. Or should I say, was, until that author took away your ability to kill. And even if you could kill again, it wouldn't matter, now that we're all dead."
"Well, there are other ways I can make you suffer," Cruella snapped, "And perhaps Hades can provide me with some suggestions!" She got in her car and drove away. As she was recklessly driving down Main Street, a woman stood in her way and stopped her car with magic.
"Out of my way!" Cruella shouted, honking her horn.
"Is that any way to address the mayor?" the woman asked.
"Who are you?" Cruella asked, as she got out of her car.
"My name is Cora," she replied, "Hades has appointed me to be the mayor of this upside-down version of Storybrooke."
"Well, you're certainly not doing a very good job, darling," Cruella, "Even Regina, as incompetent as she's become, is doing a better job running the real one."
"Don't talk about her like that!" Cora snapped.
"And why not?" Cruella asked. "What does she mean to you?"
"She's my daughter," Cora said. "I just wish that I had been able to love her in life, but I foolishly removed my heart because I was afraid of love."
"You're Regina's mother? That's fetch! But come now, darling, you're beginning to nauseate me," Cruella said, "Speaking of mothers, though, I have an appointment to keep. Cheerio, darling!" She sped off. Soon, she arrived at the cemetery. She found the tombstone marked, "Madeline De Vil" and poured the liquid over it. Suddenly, her mother appeared before her.
"Mother, is it really you?" Cruella asked.
"Cruella," Madeline gasped, "I should've known your evil would do you in, eventually."
"That's just it, mummy, I've changed." Cruella said, "Come on, let me show you how much I regret what I did to you. And then I can finally get redemption and move on from this place."
"That's wonderful, Cruella!" Madeline said, "Alright, let's go!" She got in the car, and they drove away. Soon, they arrived by the docks.
"Cruella, dear, what are we doing here?" Madeline asked, a hint of fear in her voice.
"Why, it's simple, mother," Cruella said, "I never really changed. I knew your foolhardy love for me would blind you. A leopard can't really change its spots, but they make terrific coats! Goodbye, mother!" Cruella pushed her mother out of the car and sent her plummeting into the river of souls. She drove away. As she sped maniacally down the road, she heard police sirens. She pulled over and rolled down her window, as the cop came to her car.
"Can't a girl speed down the road in peace?" she cried, "I didn't think traffic laws applied in the Underworld!"
"Oh, they do, within reason," the man said. "Lord Hades likes to make sure this town stays at least somewhat decent." Cruella glimpsed the face of the man speaking to her, and was surprised it was Prince Charming!
"What are you doing here, Sherriff Chisel-Chin?" Cruella asked, "Did someone finally do you in? Now that you're not with your wretched little wife anymore, perhaps I could give you some new romance?"
"Ah, I see you've met my brother," he said, "I'm James, Prince James. David was my twin whom I never got the chance to meet."
"I like you already! A pleasure to meet you, darling!" Cruella said, "I'm Cruella De Vil!"
"I know, and I'm afraid you're gonna have to come down to the station with me." James said.
"Maybe the Underworld won't be such a bad place after all," Cruella mused, as she got in the squad car. They made their way to the police station, where a woman was dressed in leather, and lying on the desk.
"James, I've got the handcuffs," she cooed.
"Who is this?" Cruella asked, as she was escorted to a cell.
"This is Deputy Jacq." James said, "Now you're going to stay here while Deputy Jacq and I go out…on patrol. Don't worry, it's only temporary. You won't be in here for long."
"I've been a bad girl," Jacq said, feigning innocence, "I need to be punished."
"Let me read you your rights!" James said. They walked away as Cruella sat in the cell. Soon, purple smoke appeared out of nowhere and Cora materialized. She opened the cell with a wave of her hand.
"I'm granting you a full mayoral pardon, Ms. De Vil," Cora said, "Hades doesn't want you cooped up in here."
"So perhaps Prince James wasn't following orders exactly how he should be. Thank you, darling. Now, please tell me where the local bar is." Cruella said
Meanwhile, at the bar, Liam Jones served drinks to James and Jacq.
"Oh, James," Jacq said, "I'm so glad that Huntsman, Graham, moved on so you could take your rightful place as Sheriff. You're the Sheriff this town deserves. Despite leaving me to die back when we were still living, I still love you."
"And I, you, my love," James said, "Liam, a couple drinks, on me."
"As you wish, sir." Liam said. James and Jacq clinked their glasses together, as they both drank. Suddenly, Jacq started to writhe in pain.
"What's happening?" Jacq asked. "What did you do?"
"I had Liam spike your drink a special ingredient," James said, "A little water…from the river of souls. You should've known better than to trust to the man who left you to die, Jacq."
"My love, why?" Jacq asked.
"Because I was growing tired of you," James said, as she faded into nothingness. "Now that that's settled, how about a round of drinks for all my friends?"
"What makes you think we're yer friends?" John Silver asked, coming up to him.
"Please, calm down, Captain Silver," Liam said.
"No, yer not bossin' me around, Jones!" Silver snapped, "You always were good-for-nothing, just like your brother!"
"Settle down, darlings," Cruella said, "I like you, Jimmy!" She embraced him and planted a big kiss on his lips.
"You're not so bad, yourself!" James said.
"Now, please tell there's some gin in this miserable place!" Cruella said.
"We're down to our last pint," Liam said.
"That'll have to do," Cruella said, as she chugged down the glass.
"So, how'd you get out of there?" James asked.
"The honorable mayor let me out," Cruella said.
"How about we pay the mayor a visit?" James asked.
"Marvelous idea, darling," Cruella said, "but first I'd like to visit the local pet shelter." Later, at the Underbrooke pet shelter, Gaston was putting dog food into bowls.
"No one serves dog food like Gaston, eh darling?" Cruella asked, coming out of the shadows.
"Who are you?" Gaston asked, "What do you want?"
"I'm new in town. My name is Cruella, and I'd like to borrow a few of your dogs, if you don't mind." Cruella said.
"I'm not sure Lord Hades would approve," Gaston said.
"What he doesn't know won't hurt him, darling," Cruella said.
"Hades knows all and sees all that goes on here." Gaston said. "What do you plan to do with them?"
"Merely to use as insurance," Cruella said. She went over a breathed her green smoke into the dog kennels. "Wake up, darlings! I have a little job for you!" The dogs' eyes glowed green. Later, Milah was performing her duty as a crossing guard, when she suddenly saw two women running towards her. They were Johanna, Snow White's former maid, and Auntie Em.
"Help!" Johanna cried.
"What's going on?" Milah asked.
"I stopped for a bite to eat at Auntie Em's, and several dogs started chasing us!" Johanna said.
"And none of them look like Toto!" Em said.
"I think I know who's behind this!" Johanna said, "Cruella De Vil!"
"Don't worry, ladies," came a youthful, heroic male voice, "I'll save you!" A young, muscular man stood between the oncoming dogs and the women. He picked up all the dogs by the tails, and flung them all several miles away.
"Thank you!" Auntie Em said.
"Don't mention it!" he said, "The name's Hercules, by the way!"
"I'll let you eat at my place for free for a week!" Auntie Em said.
"Thanks!" Herc said, "Sounds great!" Meanwhile, at the diner, Cora met up with Peter Pan and the Blind Witch.
"Well, if it isn't the great and terrible Queen of Hearts," Pan said, "To what do I owe the pleasure, your majesty?"
"Enough with the flattery, Pan," Cora said, "This isn't a social call."
"Come now, Cora," Pan said, "We both know I have you to thank for my restored youth. When Rumple and I first got here, I was still an old man, but your magic restored my youthful zest after those idiots resurrected my son, and ended up letting him get controlled by your wicked daughter. Yeah, trust me, I'm aware of things."
"Then you also know that my…wicked daughter had a thing for your son," Cora said, "Just as I once did. But all that's in the past. I've called this meeting because the newest arrival, Cruella, is stirring things up too much, creating too many disturbances. Hades thought she had great potential, but now she's becoming a bit of a problem."
"Come now, darlings," Cruella said, walking in, accompanied by James and Gaston, "My ears are burning. The dogs served as a delightful distraction for Hercules, wouldn't you say? This Hades seems to be awfully fickle. Does he like me, or doesn't he?"
"It doesn't matter," Pan said, "What does is that we unite to stop Hades. With our combined might and intelligence, we just may find a way to overthrow the Lord of the Underworld and get back to the land of the living."
"Keep dreaming, kiddo," came an eerie voice, as a sinister figure stepped out of the shadows.
"Hades," Cora said, ominously.
"Correct," Hades said, "The Queen of Hearts gets the prize!"
"Can I interest the Lord of the Underworld in some freshly-baked child pies?" the Blind Witch asked.
"Sorry to disappoint," Hades said, "but I didn't come for food, and your menu doesn't quite agree with me."
"I take it you didn't come for a social visit, either, darling," Cruella said.
"Right again," Hades said, "And you were right I was concerned about Cruella, Cora. I liked the intention of trying to distract my nephew with the dogs, but his victory has only made him stronger, and a step closer to defeating me, so instead of uniting to overthrow me, I suggest you unite to stop my nephew, Hercules."
"And what do we get out of it?" Pan asked.
"There's that Peter Pan selfish pride," Hades said, "Once he is defeated, you will have access to whatever part of the Underworld you desire, within reason, and maybe, just maybe I will consider trying to get at least one of you resurrected again."
"How do we know you'll keep your word?" Cora asked.
"I'm a man who, like your former lover, honors his agreements," Hades said.
"But darling," Cruella said, coming up to Hades in a seductive manner, "I'm sure we can work out an arrangement without things getting too messy."
"Despite being a De Vil, your charms are useless," Hades said, "But I actually have a very special assignment for you, Cruella. Those other dogs were small fry compared to what I'm about to give you. You've heard of the legendary guardian of the Underworld, the Cerberus, correct? The giant three-headed dog?"
"I'm not that well versed on Greek myths, but yes, I've heard of it." Cruella said, "What of it?"
"How would you like the chance to control it with your magic?" Hades asked.
"Sounds intriguing," Cruella said, "What do you have in mind?"
"I need you to use it to capture a very important person," Hades said, "Hercules' one true love and a former associate of mine, Megara."
"Wait a minute," Milah said, popping in, "Back up. Sorry to interrupt, but after overhearing what you said earlier, I had to get this off my chest." She went over to Cora and Pan.
"You mean to tell me that you're my ex-husband's father," she said, pointing to Pan, and then turned to Cora, "And you're my ex-husband's former lover and that your daughter was also in love with my ex-husband?"
"Pretty much." Cora and Pan said in unison.
"I told you to make sure all the windows were shut!" Pan said, turning to the Blind Witch.
"Sorry," the cannibalistic witch replied.
"Wow," Milah said, "this is one seriously messed up lineage! Rumple apparently was quite the player after he killed me. I guess becoming the Dark One really increased his sex appeal."
"I don't understand why you left him for the pirate," Cora said, "Rumple is the sexiest man to ever walk the earth! And I say that honestly, now that my heart is back!"
"Where do you think he gets it from?" Pan asked with a wink, "I am his father, after all."
"Now, it's time for you to go," Hades said, turning to Milah, "Or else you can endure severe punishment."
"I'll take care of her," Cora said, poofing her away.
"All right," Hades said, "Ready to begin your assignment, Cruella?" He turned to find her speeding away with James. His hair burst into blue flame and he disappeared in blue flame.
Cruella later went deep into the catacombs of the Underworld, to the lair of the Cerberus.
"I have a special job for you, darling," Cruella said, as she breathed her green smoke into its cave. The beast's eyes glowed red and then green. "Find a girl named Megara and hurt her!"
Meanwhile, Hercules was celebrating with King Fergus and Stealthy, at a local tavern.
"Hooray for Hercules!" shouted King Fergus, "I've bested many a bear in my day, lad, but you have fought lions, gorgons, hydra, and the Cerberus! I only wish Snow White's parents were still here, but alas, they've moved on to a better place."
"Thank you, King Fergus," Hercules said, "Even though I've never met her, I can tell you raised your daughter Merida well."
"Aye, she's a fiery lass, isn't she?" Fergus said. Suddenly, they heard a loud rumble and growling noise.
"What was that?" asked Stealthy.
"Probably Mordu, back for his revenge that he is!" Fergus exclaimed.
"No," Hercules said, "I fear this is something much, much worse!" Hercules walked outside to see the Cerberus in the distance.
"No!" he said, "I can't face it again!" What Hercules didn't see, is that it was chasing his beloved Meg.
"Please!" Meg cried, "Somebody, help!" Two figures watched the chase from afar. They were Peter Pan is his second-in-command, Felix.
"Y'know, Felix," Pan said, "I'm beginning to see the Underworld may have possibilities."
"What possibilities are those, oh fearless leader?" Felix scoffed.
"You still angry for me murdering you?" Pan asked.
"Yes!" Felix said, "I was totally devoted to you, and that's how you repay me?"
"You helped me accomplish my goal." Pan said, "My curse worked, Felix! Everyone was sent back, until that Wicked Witch interfered, that is! Emma and Henry had to live out a year in the land without magic, with no memories of their family."
"Yeah, I know," Felix said, "I'm just mad you murdered me."
"You were loyal to the end, Felix," Pan said, "That's what I like about you. Totally more competent than Hook's bumbling first mate, Smee."
"What are we doing here, anyway, Peter?" Felix asked.
"Well, once the Cerberus traps Meg, we may be able to bargain with the Lord of the Underworld for control of this town. So far, the Evil Queen's pathetic mother is in charge, but neither she nor Hades realize I'm really in control."
Meanwhile, Fergus was attempting to lift Hercules' spirits.
"Why so glum, lad?" Fergus asked.
"I'm only here because I couldn't defeat that thing in life, so it killed me." Hercules said.
"Y'know, if there's one thing I taught my family while I was alive, was how to be brave," Fergus said, "You have to be brave to face whatever it is before you, no matter the odds. You have to go the distance and be the hero you were born to be!"
"You got the makings of greatness in ya, lad!" Captain Silver said from the corner of the room.
"Silver, what are ye doin' here?" Fergus asked.
"After that De Vil woman came into my favorite bar, I needed a change of scenery, so I came here." Silver replied.
"You can do it, lad!" Fergus said. Hercules got up.
"You're right," he said, "I can." He opened the door back up and found the monster was gone. It burrowed deep beneath the ground, while a cowering Meg shivered in horror as she was bracing for the beast to attack her.
"Well, looks like that beast is gone!" Gaston said, surveying the damage, "Back to my day job. Cruella, please give me the dogs back that you took from me."
"Already done, darling," Cruella said, "I ordered them back to their kennels."
"I have to get back to the station," James said.
"Take me with you, darling," Cruella said, "We can make such beautiful music together!"
"Well, I have to get back to my job as mayor and make sure everything is working properly," Cora said.
"Cora, darling," Cruella said, "If you don't mind, are you looking for an assistant?"
"What could you possibly have to offer me?" Cora asked.
"A bit of style, perhaps," Cruella said, "That office did seem rather drab."
"I'll give you a chance," Cora said, "out of the kindness of my heart."
"Now I may want to rethink that suggestion," Cruella muttered.
"I see you're all getting back to your day jobs," Hades said, as he appeared before them, "Does anyone know what happened to Peter Pan?"
"No," Cruella said, "He just vanished, darling. He does seem every bit as mysterious as his son. The apple didn't fall far from the tree."
"I'll find him," the Blind Witch said, "And when I do, I may want to ask if he knows of any recipes that include Lost Boys."
"Right here," Pan said, "And no, there aren't. I was in my shop, and I have a feeling we're about to expect some company soon. I just discovered that Emma Swan is the new Dark One."
"Oh, that's rich!" Cruella said, "My murderer, the new Dark One."
"Something tells me I'm going to get a lot of business, soon." Hades said, "Chao, guys!"
"And perhaps my son will be joining us down here once again! Won't that be fun?" Pan said, "I better start preparing a warm welcome for him!"
THE END