Drunken I is not!, a x-files fanfic

Drunken I is not

The X-filer

'Hick'

"Mulder are you drunk?"

'Hick' "No"

"Mulder how many times do I have to tell you, don't come to work drunk?"

'Hick' "I is not drunk Mully, I has quenched my thirst!"

'Hick'

"Mulder you're drunk"

"No I is not, I is drank"

'Rolls eyes'

"Mulder, you have bubble wrap superglued to your head!"

"And that's the way I like it"

'Reaches up and pops it'

"Hehe, pop! Hey Mully you should try this!"

'Falls off table and into trash can'

"Hey Mully look! My butt is stuck! Hehe"

"Mulder! Why do you do this to me?"

"Because I love you, that's why! I mean come on who else would superglue the bubbly wrap to his head if he didn't love you!"

"I would have preferred flowers instead"

"But Mully, I did get you flowers, pretty flowers, pretty expensive flowers!" 'Hick'

'Raises eyebrow'

"Oh? Then where are they?"

"In the bin which my biga caboose is sitting on!"

"Mulder?"

"Yes Mully?"

"You're drunk!"

"Hey Scully, look at this!"

"Mulder what are you doing now?"

"I'm communicating with Frohike!"

"Mulder tell me again. How on earth did you get Bubble wrap stuck to your head?"

"I don't know just did, now quiet I'm communicating with Frohike!"

"I'll communicate with you and it won't be through bubble wrap! Mulder sober up already! We are due in Skinners office in 5 minutes!"

"I will sober up when I think I need to sober up!"

"Mulder don't you think Skinner is a good reason for needing to be sober?!"

'Thinks'

"You're right"

'Sits and concentrates with bubble wrap on head'

"Mulder? What are you doing?"

"I'm sobering up!"

'CRUNCH!'

"Mulder what was that?"

'Smiles sheepily'

"Well we'll just say your flowers aren't coming back anytime soon"

"Mulder!!"

"Frohike? Are you still there?"

A/N

Hey guys

I was bored!

Anyways I don't expect anything from this but I do hope you liked it

Thanks for reading!