HA! Bet you weren't expecting a sequel to this were you? Jeez, I got all these great reviews for 9 Things I Hate About Everyone I decided to do a sequel. Based on a month later after April and Raph's discussion. Enjoy!
&&&&&&
Twenty-three year old April O'Neil waited at the bus stop for her ride into town. Her life could not be anymore crappier. For starters, her van had finally crapped out so she had no ride to get her grocery shopping done, which she completely despises anyway. Her electricity was on the blink again, so she didn't get to blow dry her hair, she had no hot water, and she had run out of coffee of all days. Then, to top it all off, the turtles had called to ask her to buy their food as well, meaning that she had to be at the grocery store for twice as long!
So, our beloved character stood there fuming away about how much her life sucks, and how she could be doing a whole bunch of better things right now.
Just then, a businessman strolled over to her and stood beside her. April, who wasn't in the mood for talking to anyone, just ignored him.
Five minutes passed before the man asked, "Has the bus come yet?"
Well, April just snapped. "IF THE BUS HAD COME TO YOU REALLY THINK I WOULD BE STANDING HERE?" She thundered, glaring at him.
"I'm sorry miss, it's just that I'm running late for work as it is, and I thought that you had just missed a bus too, and you were waiting for the next one." The man replied.
"WHAT DO YOU TAKE ME FOR? SOME KIND OF DISGRUNTLED, DISORGANIZED WOMAN WHO CAN'T KEEP TRACK OF TIME AND CAN'T TAKE OF HERSELF? AND WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU POINTING AT YOUR WATCH FOR ANYWAY? I KNOW WHERE YOUR WATCH IS BUDDY! FOR GOD SAKE! DO I POINT AT MY CROTCH WHEN I ASK WHERE THE TOILET IS?" April screamed.
The man stared at April in disbelief as the bus pulled up.
"I hate people…" April grumbled hopping on the bus.
&&&&&&
Once April got on the bus, she had to sit next to a young girl, because that was the only seat available. As the bus was moving along the street, April noticed a car off to the side that began to creep up more and more, until it made a sharp move in front of the bus.
"Did that guy just cut us off?" April hissed.
The girl turned to her, and nodded.
"How old are you?" April asked.
"Seventeen." The girl replied.
"Good, then you won't mind me swearing. What kind of stupid moron thinks that they have the right to cut people off? What a bastard! Does he own the road? Is his name written on this road? I don't see any freakin' name anywhere on this road which means he has no right to go bombing around in his car, cutting off people, and nearly getting everyone into a car accident!" April snapped.
The girl stared at April in shock before getting up and leaving her seat to sit as far away from April as possible.
&&&&&&
Now April was at the grocery store. As she was strolling around with her cart, a man cut her off sharply nearly crashing into her. April, who was in no mood for yelling at the moment, casually flipped him off and moved along her merry way.
As she made her way down an isle, she noticed that there were about five or six workers who were re-shelving, and rearranging things. Of course, they happened to be standing right in her way for the product she wanted.
She casually strolled up to one of the workers and said, "Excuse me, but couldn't you have rearranged these shelves after store hours so that you wouldn't be in the way of people who are trying to get food, but they can't because you people are in the way? Or are you just so pea brained that you didn't even think of something like that? Or is it just because you'd rather drag your lazy ass home at the end of the day instead of rearranging shelves after store hours?"
The man turned around and said, "Excuse me miss, but you have no right to speak to us that way."
"Of course I do, if you're going to be in my way, then I have every right to say what I want to say to you." And with that, she casually walked away.
&&&&&&
Later that dayApril was supposed to pick up the turtles so that they could go see "Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest". Seeing that her car was in the repair shop, she had to borrow Casey's car, which was parked on the curb outside of her shop. As she came out, she noticed that someone had double - parked in front of her car, which only pissed her off, seeing that she was boxed in, and there was no way for her to get out.
"The movie starts in fifteen minutes…Beautiful." She muttered as she began to pace back and forth. It was hot outside, and April was beginning to get angrier and angrier by the minute.
She heard her shell cell ring and casually picked up. "April? Where are you? We're going to miss the movie! We're still waiting for you!" Leo exclaimed, sounding rather impatient.
"Oh Leo, you stupid old turtle…Do you not think that I am aware that we are going to miss the movie? I haven't come to pick you up because some moron has double - parked in front of the car so that I am boxed in, and there is no possible way for me to get out. So you're just going to have to wait." April said sarcastically.
"…But April, we're going to miss the movie…" Leo began to argue.
"Again, do you think that I am not aware of that? This could have been avoided completely if my car was working, and even if it wasn't working, I could still use Casey's car, and if Casey had been smart enough to buy a spare car, he could've used that. But no, so he has to drive around in the Battle Shell, so that you can't even come and pick me up!" April snapped.
"I have no idea what you just said." Leo said.
"Of course you wouldn't, why would you?" April replied before hanging up the phone.
"So…What's the deal? Are we going to the movies or not?" Mikey asked.
"I think April is going through PMS right now or somethingso it all depends…" Leo said.
&&&&&&
A few hours later a young man and his wife strolled over to the car that was boxing April in.
April stormed over to them and screamed, "WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH YOU? WHERE DO YOU GET OFF DOUBLE-PARKING LIKE THAT? HAVE YOU NO SHAME? I MISSED THE BEST MOVIE EVER BECAUSE OF YOU, YOU BASTARD!"
The man glared at her, and the woman harrumphed her before they drove away.
&&&&&&
About a few minuteslater April was watching a commercial for an air ventilator. The number was displayed below, and April casually picked up the phone and dialed the number.
"Hello…Have you called to buy a new air ventilator for your home?" A cheery voice asked over the phone.
April smirked. "Actually, I was calling to tell you that your product sucks. You interview these people who have supposedly used your product, but they sound congested, which means that the damn thing doesn't even work. Why would I want to buy a product that doesn't work? And another thing, what do you mean when you say the air ventilator is new and improved? If it's new, it means that the product has never been made before. If it's improved, it means that you screwed up the first time and you just made a better one the second time. So which is it?" April asked as she heard a click.
A few days later the air ventilator was the off market.
&&&&&&
April was walking in the mall with Casey when she watched a young girl walk by with a few of her friends. The girls were dressed extremely inappropriately, and seeing that their parents weren't around, she had no choice but to comment.
"What kind of disgusting display is that? Do you really think everyone wants to see your boobs and ass exposed like that? I mean, do you girls have a mirror at your house, or do you know that you look so horrible? And your parents are either blind or extremely insane for letting you walk around in public like that." April said casually, as the girls ran off.
April sighed, and then rolled her eyes as she saw a boy walk by with his girlfriend. The boy had his pants down past his butt revealing most of his underwear. April walked over and pulled his underwear up resulting in a wedgie.
"From now on, pull up your pants because seeing your boxer shorts is not a pretty sight." April said before walking off.
&&&&&&
Now, our dear character is taking a nice walk in the park when a man strolls over and happens to comment about how nice her body looks. April grabs him by the collar and puts him off with a warning, "If you ever say something like that to me again I'll kick you in the place where the sun don't shine." (AN: That was sort of a random part, but I really hate it when a man you don't even know thinks he has the right to say something like that to you about your body.)
&&&&&&
On a bright sunny day, April is driving the turtles to go see the Pirates movie since they missed the last showing.
Donny begins to feel uncomfortable and has to make a comment about something, "April, is it true that you nearly strangled Casey the other night for making a comment about your clothes?"
April turned around in her seat and replied, "Donny, Donny, Donny. Of course I did something like that because every one knows that if you talk any shit about my clothes, I'll squeeze your head."
Donny gave a weak smile and sunk back in his seat as all the brothers gave eachother weary looks.
&&&&&&
At April's apartment after the movie…
As the turtles were talking about the movie with Casey, April heard the phone ring.
"Hello, would you like to buy a brand new phone service that allows you to make long distance calls for a cheap price?" The man asked over the phone.
"Oh, I'm not quite sure about that, can I give you a call later? If you could just give me your home phone number that would be great."
"Um…We're not allowed to do that miss."
"Oh, so your saying you don't like it when people call you asking for something while you're eating dinner, or even while you're relaxing?"
"Um…Not particularly miss."
"Oh, good. Now you know how I feel." April said hanging up the phone.
&&&&&&
A few days later April was getting ready to go out with the turtles and Casey when the doorbell rang. April answered it to find a man there selling some type of a computer service.
"I AM SO SICK AND TIRED OF EVERYBODY ASKING ME WHAT THE HELL I WANT! CAN YOU NOT SEE THAT I AM BUSY GETTING READY FOR SOMETHING? I DON'T WANT ANY OF THIS CRAP! STOP WASTING MY TIME AND LEAVE ME ALONE!" April said slamming the door in his face.
&&&&&&
The turtles and Casey showed up at the appropriate time and went up to April's apartment.
"Um…I really don't think April's in the mood for going out tonight…" Donny said.
"I guess not…I can't think of any other reason of why the outside of her door is all smashed up, and why that sign reads, "This will be your face if you ring this doorbell one more time." Casey said.
THE END
&&&&&&
Sorry if April was a little out of character, I just really like it when she gets pissed off and throws hissy fits like that. Anyway, please review, I hope you enjoyed it and got a few laughs out of it. This was strictly just for fun. And that scene with the telephone was from a Seinfeld episode. Disclaimer: I do not own TMNT!