Hi. Welcome to one of the most random things I've ever written. I wrote it with my friend by texting. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Don't own anything...except 1/2 of the crazy mastermindedness that came up with the idea.

One morning, Italy woke up in horror. His brother, Romano, was nowhere to be found. The only clue to his whereabouts was left on the doorstep. A single half-eaten tomato lay there next to a box of lemons. Italy looked at the box and saw the German writing on the side. He couldn't read it, but since he spent so much time around Germany, he recognized the language. Italy was confused. I'll go ask Germany if's he's seen Romano, and why his lemons were sitting on my doorstep. He set out on his journey with a bed sheet wrapped around him, because he was in too much of a hurry to get dressed. Preoccupied with his thought, he was surprised to find that he had walked right across Switzerland's lawn, again. Switzerland flung the door open and shot his rifle, standing in front of innocent Liechtenstein's eyes. Italy, being missed by the single fired bullet, shrieked and ran blindly into France. He fell to the ground and apologized quickly. All of a sudden, everyone stared straight up at the sky, even France. Tony was looking for France, because he scared America as a child and needed to be punished. Italy sprinted towards Germany's house, yelling nonsense about aliens and tomato box fairies. He knocked quickly and Germany opened the door. He was naked.

"Hi!" Italy smiled, unfazed by his friend's nudity.

"Hello."

"What's new?"

"Someone stole my boxers. Have you seen them?" Germany asked, welcoming Italy inside.

"All of them?" Italy asked.

"Ja." He frowned.

"They might be in your box of lemons that you left at my house."

Germany grabbed a rifle and a sheet. He tied the sheet around him and prepared to leave.

"Wait, have you seen Romano?" Italy yelled out Germany's front door as Germany walked away.

"Nein!" He shouted as he prepared to run the shortcut across Switzerland's lawn. Italy heard gunshots as Germany disappeared.

Italy was still suspicious about his brother, so he started to peek around. He opened a closet and found it to be full of sock puppets. Italy smiled and his childish instinct took over. He grabbed a handful of puppets and started playing with them. As he sat down in the hallway, Prussia appeared from the bathroom. He stared at Italy, then the pile of sock puppets, and then the open closet.

"I will invade your vital regions, Ita-chan!" Italy ran down the hall and into Germany's room. He panted. This was a lot of running for one day. Meanwhile, Prussia started searching the closet full of sock puppets. Why hadn't he ever known about this? He was pushed from behind by Spain, who clicked the lock. Prussia was locked in the closet. Spain smiled. Now he could rob Germany's. He brought his bull, which happened hate Italians. The bull ran to Italy's hiding spot and converted to be a nun. Finland, who was drunk and confused, climbed down the chimney, thinking it was Christmas. He fell down into a random pond and sobered up.

Finland smiled. "I declare today International Hugs Day!" Italy laughed and went to hug Spain. Spain smiled, ready to accept the hug.

Then, out of nowhere, Germany came home. He threw his boxers on the table and decided to go and steal Russia's nuclear bombs. He walked out the door. About five minutes later, he walked in. "I failed."

Italy remembered that he needed to find Romano. First, he realized he hadn't peed at all that day, so went to do that. After he finished his business, he decided he would go ask Russia about Romano. Just before he left, he made the mistake of running straight into Germany's stereo and turning it on. German sparkle party music began to play and Prussia broke down the closet door.

Just then, Russia walked out of the kitchen. "The oven has become one!" Germany ran into his kitchen to find his oven to find his oven branded with Russia's logo. Germany went up and slapped Russia, which was a mistake because Belarus had followed Russia to Germany's. Belarus threw a knife at Germany which he dodged. While this was all happening, Italy started doing jumping jacks because he thought Germany wanted him to.

America walked in the front door throwing cheeseburgers. England, who was spying on the Axis, roundhouse kicked him. America shoved a burger in his mouth and England passed out, choking. Finland, who was still hugging everyone, attempted CPR. Then he got tired and went home. Prussia ran after Finland, demanding presents. Italy yelled, "Someone just tell me where Romano is!" Prussia started laughing, which caused Germany to yell louder.

"Who wants beer?" He asked. Tony walked through the opened front door, looking for France who escaped and was hiding in the closet. Spain decided to stop robbing the house because he had a dentist appointment to get to. He ran out the door. Looking down, he realized someone had stolen his pants. He back up to the house and stole Germany's potatoes. Germany didn't notice, but Russia did. He took out a pipe and hit Spain on the head.

Out of no where, Romano appeared from the attic and yelled many words that should not be repeated and something about France. Italy hugged him tightly and Spain grabbed his curl. (Which caused more words that shall not be repeated.)

Germany frowned. "I had nothing to do with this."

"But it's your house." Spain shot back.

"I didn't know he was up there!" He protested. France smiled and admitted he'd secretly locked Romano up there for 'his own purposes.' (Again, there were more unrepeatable words….) Italy asked awkward questions until Germany got fed up with it and duct tape his mouth shut. Italy was confused and hugged him while Romano yanked the tape off his mouth. Germany took more tape and stuck it over Romano's mouth because he was sick of all the cursing. Spain was thankful as he pulled both of the Italy brothers' curls.

Russia walked around 'asking' (commanding) people to become one with him. When everyone said no, he made the mistake of yelling a little too loudly. "Everyone must become one!" His little sister walked in the still-open front door, holding two wedding rings. Russia screamed as Belarus forced a ring onto his finger and attempted to kiss him. Tony blessed their marriage after returning to the house with Sealand.