The 11th Doctor: User Guide and Manual
CONGRATULATIONS! You've just purchased a DOCTOR unit of your very own! To ensure that you use your new unit to the very best of his abilities and that you avoid having him randomly regenerate, please study the manual below.
Name: The Doctor. Just the Doctor.
Age: 1107- he says.
Place of Manufacture: Gallifrey
Height: 5'11"
Your 11th Doctor unit comes with the following accessories:
One (1) Tweed jacket
One (1) Green Greatcoat
One (1) Purple Coat
Two (2) Baby blue button down shirts
Two (2) Light pink button down shirts
Two (2) Light Grey button down shirts
One (1) Pair of trousers
One (1) Pair of men's dress shoes
Three (3) pre-tied amazingly-cool bowties (Red, Blue, and Purple)
One (1) fez- also cool
One (1) Sonic Screwdriver
Programming
Your 11th Doctor is capable of doing the following:
Protector of Worlds: Home planet about to be invaded/destroyed/stolen/etc.? Never fear, THE DOCTOR unit will save you.
Doctor: Quite obviously, he can diagnose and treat almost anything. He has doctorates in medicine and cheese-making.
Best Friend:
Removal of your 11TH DOCTOR from Packaging:
Our 11TH DOCTOR Unit is a very heavy sleeper- mostly because he spends all day running around- so waking him up shouldn't be that easy. However, we have provided several working methods for awakening him.
1. Yell, "OH MY GOD THE DALEKS!" Your DOCTOR Unit will pop out heroically, and upon realizing there is not any danger, he should calm down enough for you to reprogram him.
2. Knock lightly on the box and say, "Hello Sweetie." The DOCTOR Unit will pop out excitedly and, upon realizing you are not River Song, should sheepishly allow you to reprogram him.
3. Play large drums close to the box then run like hell. The DOCTOR will look for any MASTER Units and, when he finds nothing he'll stop, then you may talk to and reprogram him.
4. Open the lid and wait. Eventually he'll get up and can be reprogrammed.
Reprogramming
After unpacking your 11TH DOCTOR unit, you can reprogram him into any of the following modes:
Heroic (Default)
Gleeful (Default)
Angst-y/Sad
Angry
Murderous/Generally Insane (Locked)
THE 11TH DOCTOR comes in Heroic and Gleeful mode by default. Regardless of time or place he will run around, saving people and being cool. He loves saving people, usually women, from impending doom or boredom.
Angst-y/Sad mode is only activated by mentioning any of his past companions. Once in this mode, it is suggested that you acquire a Unit from our COMPANION line to cheer him up.
Angry mode is not recommended- he tends to think quite irrationally when angry and may snap into Murderous/ Generally Insane Mode, and that would not be good. Try to calm him down- quickly.
Murderous/Generally Insane Mode is locked for a verygood reason- he is not supposed to be batcrap insane. Seriously, the only units who could snap him out of this murderous would be either a ROSE TYLER or a RIVER SONG unit. In this mode, the DOCTOR Unit will probably end up trying to kill something. So keep him away from DAVROS or DALEK Units to keep him slightly sane, please.
Cleaning
Your Doctor unit can wash himself just fine and attempting to shower or bathe with him will result in him running around your house in a towel screaming bloody murder.
Rest
Your Doctor unit rarely needs rest, but will eventually. Have fun trying to get him to sleep.
Thank you for your purchase of a Eleventh Doctor unit.