Law glanced at the clock. 11:36, it read. A little more than half past midnight on Christmas Eve. He sighed quietly, his eyes closing for a moment to block out the stark white of the infirmary. That left only the soft, rhythmic beeping of machines around him, monitoring heart rate and oxygen intake.
He opened his eyes, and for once Law wished he wasn't so good at his job. He was a good doctor, yes, but that also meant he understood every risk, every rapidly slimming chance that went by with each day.
Each day that Zoro lay here, silent and unresponsive and wrapped in white bandages that contrasted starkly with his tan skin. He had been asleep for nearly three weeks now, after a battle that had left him on the edge of death's chasm once more. This was a normal thing for Zoro, almost killing himself and all that despite his monstrous strength and unbelievable willpower. That was how he'd managed to pull through so far, but…
Law sighed. Every day that passed lessened Zoro's chances of waking up at all. He didn't want to give the rest of the Strawhat crew false hope, but their little reindeer doctor was stubbornly optimistic, insisting that this coma was Zoro's body's way of forcing him to rest long enough for it to heal.
Luffy had nodded solemnly, trusting in Chopper's words without asking any questions, but he could see the uncertainty in the eyes of the rest of the rubber man's nakama, and he understood it. This was different. They weren't sure this time.
No one was. Even Law's impressive surgical skills had been put to the test when he had to remove slivers of shrapnel, piece by tiny piece, from Zoro's chest and abdomen with the aid of tweezers, hemostats, and a magnet, all the while making sure that the swordsman wasn't bleeding out the blood he couldn't afford to lose. Some of those pieces had been terrifyingly close to his heart, lungs, and other various important organs, but miraculously none had been punctured. One particularly jagged piece had grazed his lung, but the swordsman was exceedingly lucky that it hadn't been worse.
Of course this would have killed a normal man three times over, but not Zoro. From the shrapnel in his body to the poison-coated knives that had slashed him more times than Law wanted to count to the devastating concussion that had possibly dented his skull, Zoro stubbornly refused to die no matter what the laws of nature said.
He was still holding on, but Law could feel doubt starting to cast its shadow. And with it came a cold, empty sadness, something he hadn't felt in a long time. He tried to push it away, tried to tell himself that Zoro would pull through just because nothing like this could kill Zoro, because how could he die before he reached his dream? How…?
But Law couldn't lie to himself, no matter how hard he tried. He couldn't ignore his medical expertise, experience, and the time that was all too quickly slipping by. He knew that wounds like these were devastating, even to someone with Zoro's constitution, and it would be an uphill battle all the way to recover from it. He knew the poison that had ravaged Zoro's body and twice tried to stop his heart had weakened him greatly, leeching away the strength he so desperately needed to stay alive.
He knew Zoro's chances were slim to none, and getting slimmer every day he lay asleep, pale and weak and breathing shallowly even with the oxygen mask over his mouth and nose.
Law came out of his trance of thoughts and looked down at Zoro, who seemed thin and pale in the hospital bed, the IV tubes in his arm the only thing keeping him nourished and alive at the moment. He blinked, trying to ignore the way his vision blurred with tears, and reached out slowly to hold Zoro's hand, gently squeezing the limp fingers and wishing desperately to feel a reassuring squeeze in return.
It wasn't fair, he thought to himself as tears slid down his cheeks and a hollow, empty feeling opened up inside of him, a dull, persistent ache that only sharpened when he remembered the times before this whole shitty disaster had happened. Why did it have to be Zoro? Why his Zoro? Why his stupid, protective, stubborn, loving marimo Zoro…?
"It's not fair," he whispered to himself, not knowing why, as he rubbed his eyes with the heel of his free hand. Not that he would have wished this kind of harm on any of the other members of the crew, it was just that he didn't know what else to think… He knew Zoro would have wanted it this way; he was protecting his nakama, and that was his mission. But he didn't want Zoro to die, either.
He didn't want to lose the one person he had come to care so deeply for, not so soon… Not after he'd promised he would never let the people he cared about be hurt like they had for two years. Law's tattooed hand clenched into a fist. No… he thought, closing his eyes. Not again… Why am I so weak…?
He felt tears stinging at his eyes again when the infirmary door opened with a creak, and he quickly blinked them away. The soft click of hooves on the wooden floor told him it was Chopper, and he relaxed slightly. He trusted the reindeer doctor, to an extent, but he was still only an ally to them.
"How is he doing?" the reindeer's voice asked softly, looking up at Law. His face was young and childish, but his eyes were grave and wise. He was a true doctor if Law ever saw one, and he respected that.
"No change," Law murmured, almost robotically. It was the answer he was used to giving by now, looking down at Zoro's unresponsive body. He looked tired, Law thought, even in his sleep. It wasn't a surprise to him; Zoro was fighting for his life every minute he slept.
Chopper pursed his lips, climbing up to sit on the edge of Zoro's bed. "He'll come around," he said quietly, though the words seemed hollow now. They were the same words he said every night, with Zoro still unresponsive and unconscious. "Just give him some time."
Time was something Zoro didn't have. Law knew that, and so did Chopper. "He doesn't have time," the surgeon said quietly, a hint of bitterness in his tone. "Every day he has less."
Chopper's ears drooped, and his gaze dropped to the blankets. "I know," he said quietly, his voice heavy with an unseen weight, one they both knew too well. "But he has to wake up soon, right?" He tried to sound hopeful, but his voice seemed hollow even to his own ears.
Law stayed silent a few moments, blinking slowly. Part of him wanted to say yes, say that of course he would, because he was Zoro. That was what Zoro did. He always came through in the end… "We can hope," was his whispered reply.
His hand slowly reached out to caress Zoro's cheek, moving up to brush his green hair with gentle fingers, the hair he had so loved to tangle his fingers in when they kissed and had caressed when they sat alone together, just because he could… It made Law's eyes sting with tears all over again, and he drew back his hand with his teeth sunk into his lip.
"You should get some rest," Chopper said gently, laying a hoof on his arm, and Law tried to hold his cool, emotionless mask in place. "It's late."
"Doesn't matter," Law replied in a low voice, shaking off the little doctor's touch. He wasn't tired, or at least he didn't care enough to obey his body's urges for him to sleep.
"…you could come out and see everyone," Chopper suggested quietly after a moment. He didn't want to give up; his concern for Law had been growing along with his concern for Zoro. It worried him that they both seemed to be getting no better. "The party's not over yet." They all had agreed to have a Christmas party despite the fact that Zoro had still not awoken, though it was more subdued and less boisterous than their usual brand of celebration.
Law only shook his head. "I'll be fine, Tanuki-ya," he said quietly, his gaze never leaving Zoro's pale form. "You go. They'll be missing you soon, anyway. Someone has to keep watch here."
Chopper was silent for a moment, and he nodded slowly. "Okay," he conceded quietly. "Sanji will bring you something to eat later. Merry Christmas, Law."
Law smiled faintly, though it never reached his eyes. "Merry Christmas," he said, his voice faint as a whisper, and he gave a halfhearted wave in the reindeer's direction as he walked towards the door. He glanced up at the clock. It was just past midnight now, meaning it was Christmas, even though it really didn't feel like a holiday at all.
After the door shut with a resounding click, Law couldn't hold it in anymore. He didn't even try to stop the tears flowing down his cheeks, hiccupping sobs wracking his chest as he laid his head in his arms over Zoro's chest, tears dampening the swordsman's scarred and tanned skin. All he wanted was his Zoro… It didn't feel like Christmas at all without him…
"It's not fair.." Law whispered, wiping tears from his eyes in a vain attempt to clear his vision. "I miss you, dammit… I miss you so damn much…" His chest gave a painful squeeze, one he knew he couldn't attribute to myocardial infarction, and he couldn't remember feeling so alone in a long time.
Law didn't know how much time had passed in his haze of sadness and self-pity when he heard a faint grunt from underneath him, felt the vibration of the swordsman's chest, and felt his own heart nearly leap into his throat.
He sat up shakily, his own eyes wide as he watched Zoro's open with his heart pounding. He forgot to breathe for a few seconds as those eyes focused on him, and a small smirk pulled at the corners of his mouth.
"Heh… I heard you missed me," Zoro said hoarsely, his voice slightly muffled by the mask, which he haphazardly pulled off to allow himself to breathe more freely.
Law didn't know whether to laugh or cry, so he ended up doing both as he wrapped his arms around Zoro, hugging as tightly as he could without hampering Zoro's ability to breathe. "You bastard…" he whispered. "I can't believe you worried me like that."
Zoro smiled tiredly, holding his boyfriend close and gently running a hand through his soft black hair. "Sorry about that," he said with a quiet laugh. He glanced at the wreath decorating the door and the tinsel strung around the infirmary and smiled.
"Merry Christmas," he whispered into Law's hair, and the other held him close, making a noise that was somewhere between a sob and a laugh.
"Thanks," he said only a little shakily, looking up at Zoro with a smile that was all the gift he needed for the holiday season. "Best present I've ever gotten..."
Zoro chuckled softly. "Really?" he asked. "You deserve way more than just this."
"I don't need anything else," Law said, smiling and closing his eyes as he laid his head against Zoro's shoulder. "You're all I really wanted… considering everyone else here is an idiot," he added quickly, feeling his cheeks heat up in embarrassment.
Zoro just laughed at that and hugged him tighter. He had never cared much for celebrations, but he had to admit that this truly was a Christmas miracle.