~*~
In various delusional states one can believe they own all - you can achieve this by using assorted hallucinogenic drugs but our supply has been cruelly cut off. There seems to be a mix up, it seems some one has our coveted narcotics and we have a sneaking suspicion it's J.K.Rowling!... By the way this is our disclaimer.
Our story starts in the Leaky Jock Strap - a slightly known pub in the magical town of Hogsmead. The leaky Jock strap attracted a very different type of clientele compared to its more famous and cleaner brother the three broom sticks. Now this isn't just to do with the hygiene, you see the leaky jock strap has a reputation - which of course, as I'm sure you are all aware is a dangerous thing - a reputation tends to make up peoples minds for them, especially in this case. The leaky jock strap was known as the current head quarters of the wizarding world's organised crime syndicate - the Stafia. The Stafia were a mean mob who specialised in weapons dealership, drug pushing, protection rackets and other such evil but profitable past times. The Stafia also had a strangle hold on butter beer production in the EU and were looking to expand their horizons to include the lucrative pumpkin juice market. But, strangely enough, it's not the Stafia this story is about though, of course,
they play an integral role.
THE STAFIA CALL IN A FAVOUR
Oliver Wood sat at a large rectangular oak table in the `back' room at the Leaky Jock Strap. He was wearing his suit robes and had an `I'm superior to you and your dog' look on his unspeakably cute face. He was tapping his ringed fingers on the edge of the table which was covered with a brilliant white table cloth. A loud knock from the doorway to his left interrupted his drumming. He preformed a drum role before saying in a cool voice.
"Come." The door creaked open to reveal the two unmistakable hulks of Crabb and Goyle. Sandwiched between them but still managing to look terminally handsome and quite calm was Legolas, prince of Mirkwood. Oliver motioned to an empty chair at the other end of the table. Acknowledging him with a quick nod Legolas sat down, carefully placing his gigantic silver bow on the table. The bow managed to knock off the crystal vase centre piece, all the fine bone China wear and a surprised looking ferret with a pretty blue bow that had been hiding underneath a newspaper. Legolas remained completely calm - as if nothing had happened. Oliver raised an eyebrow then picked the squealing fidgeting ferret up, gripping him tightly but coolly.
"Ah Mr Malfoy, I've been looking for you." Oliver clicked his fingers once then twice causing Crabbe and Goyle to start. "Mr Crabbe please deal with Mr Malfoy." The ferret's squeaks grew louder and more urgent. Oliver brought his face within centimetres of the ferrets before whispering "Perhaps next time you will pay more attention to you bills." Oliver smiled as Malfoy was taken out of the room. Legolas looked puzzled.
"What was that all about?"
"Mr Malfoy is a student at a school I attend. He is a client of mine who enjoys 24 hour protection from some of my very own body guards from my academy. They're a low model - they have the brawn but not the brains. So they're quite cheap but Mr Malfoy still didn't seem to be able to pay his bills." Oliver smiled.
Legolas flicked one shimmering blonde/ white hair over his shoulder and glanced at Oliver.
"Woody, I don't mean to sound impertinent but apart from the showing of your petting zoo what did you bring me here for?"
Oliver blushed. Chafe
"I asked you to use my pet name strictly when we were alone." And he looked pointedly at the tuxedo clad man who stood at the door trying to control his giggles.
"Bwaye, please stand OUTSIDE the door." Bwaye rolled his eyes but obliged not, however, before whipping his gun out and pointing it at Legolas's head.
"I'll be back" he said with a thick Austrian accent.
"Yes, yes" Legolas yawned loudly and obviously "Asta la vista baby."
Bwaye grinned widely and gave him a wink before quickly marching through the door. Wood gave an exasperated sigh and put his hand over his face.
"And Bwaye?" his head appeared again
"Sir?"
"Try to remember to open the door next time."
Bwaye gave a sheepish grin and gave a quick salute before withdrawing his head back through the man sized hole he had made.
"Honestly," Wood massaged his temples, "I'm surrounded by idiots. Present company excepted of course."
"Of course" Legolas nodded in understanding. "Hulks are not what they used to be."
"Too true." Wood gave another sigh this one more forlorn. "In my grandfather's time all our men were built up in body, brains and soul. Now we have more incompetents than those worth their keep and due to a new equal opportunity act we not only have to employ females but make sure the hulks don't ruin their professional relationship. 007 is having particular trouble with that new one."
"And then there is always workplace safe." Legolas added.
Oliver groaned "Don't even get me started on that one. What criminal organisation boasts being the safest there is?!" he took a deep calming breath. "However we mustn't get sidetracked from the real purpose of your visit."
"Which is?" Legolas asked eagerly. Wood sat back is his chair, starring at the blond elf intently.
"The calling in of a favour."
~*~
The Stafia wish you to respect their authority and over all omnipotence by leaving a review. Please remember we have eyes everywhere including in our eye sockets.
In various delusional states one can believe they own all - you can achieve this by using assorted hallucinogenic drugs but our supply has been cruelly cut off. There seems to be a mix up, it seems some one has our coveted narcotics and we have a sneaking suspicion it's J.K.Rowling!... By the way this is our disclaimer.
Our story starts in the Leaky Jock Strap - a slightly known pub in the magical town of Hogsmead. The leaky Jock strap attracted a very different type of clientele compared to its more famous and cleaner brother the three broom sticks. Now this isn't just to do with the hygiene, you see the leaky jock strap has a reputation - which of course, as I'm sure you are all aware is a dangerous thing - a reputation tends to make up peoples minds for them, especially in this case. The leaky jock strap was known as the current head quarters of the wizarding world's organised crime syndicate - the Stafia. The Stafia were a mean mob who specialised in weapons dealership, drug pushing, protection rackets and other such evil but profitable past times. The Stafia also had a strangle hold on butter beer production in the EU and were looking to expand their horizons to include the lucrative pumpkin juice market. But, strangely enough, it's not the Stafia this story is about though, of course,
they play an integral role.
THE STAFIA CALL IN A FAVOUR
Oliver Wood sat at a large rectangular oak table in the `back' room at the Leaky Jock Strap. He was wearing his suit robes and had an `I'm superior to you and your dog' look on his unspeakably cute face. He was tapping his ringed fingers on the edge of the table which was covered with a brilliant white table cloth. A loud knock from the doorway to his left interrupted his drumming. He preformed a drum role before saying in a cool voice.
"Come." The door creaked open to reveal the two unmistakable hulks of Crabb and Goyle. Sandwiched between them but still managing to look terminally handsome and quite calm was Legolas, prince of Mirkwood. Oliver motioned to an empty chair at the other end of the table. Acknowledging him with a quick nod Legolas sat down, carefully placing his gigantic silver bow on the table. The bow managed to knock off the crystal vase centre piece, all the fine bone China wear and a surprised looking ferret with a pretty blue bow that had been hiding underneath a newspaper. Legolas remained completely calm - as if nothing had happened. Oliver raised an eyebrow then picked the squealing fidgeting ferret up, gripping him tightly but coolly.
"Ah Mr Malfoy, I've been looking for you." Oliver clicked his fingers once then twice causing Crabbe and Goyle to start. "Mr Crabbe please deal with Mr Malfoy." The ferret's squeaks grew louder and more urgent. Oliver brought his face within centimetres of the ferrets before whispering "Perhaps next time you will pay more attention to you bills." Oliver smiled as Malfoy was taken out of the room. Legolas looked puzzled.
"What was that all about?"
"Mr Malfoy is a student at a school I attend. He is a client of mine who enjoys 24 hour protection from some of my very own body guards from my academy. They're a low model - they have the brawn but not the brains. So they're quite cheap but Mr Malfoy still didn't seem to be able to pay his bills." Oliver smiled.
Legolas flicked one shimmering blonde/ white hair over his shoulder and glanced at Oliver.
"Woody, I don't mean to sound impertinent but apart from the showing of your petting zoo what did you bring me here for?"
Oliver blushed. Chafe
"I asked you to use my pet name strictly when we were alone." And he looked pointedly at the tuxedo clad man who stood at the door trying to control his giggles.
"Bwaye, please stand OUTSIDE the door." Bwaye rolled his eyes but obliged not, however, before whipping his gun out and pointing it at Legolas's head.
"I'll be back" he said with a thick Austrian accent.
"Yes, yes" Legolas yawned loudly and obviously "Asta la vista baby."
Bwaye grinned widely and gave him a wink before quickly marching through the door. Wood gave an exasperated sigh and put his hand over his face.
"And Bwaye?" his head appeared again
"Sir?"
"Try to remember to open the door next time."
Bwaye gave a sheepish grin and gave a quick salute before withdrawing his head back through the man sized hole he had made.
"Honestly," Wood massaged his temples, "I'm surrounded by idiots. Present company excepted of course."
"Of course" Legolas nodded in understanding. "Hulks are not what they used to be."
"Too true." Wood gave another sigh this one more forlorn. "In my grandfather's time all our men were built up in body, brains and soul. Now we have more incompetents than those worth their keep and due to a new equal opportunity act we not only have to employ females but make sure the hulks don't ruin their professional relationship. 007 is having particular trouble with that new one."
"And then there is always workplace safe." Legolas added.
Oliver groaned "Don't even get me started on that one. What criminal organisation boasts being the safest there is?!" he took a deep calming breath. "However we mustn't get sidetracked from the real purpose of your visit."
"Which is?" Legolas asked eagerly. Wood sat back is his chair, starring at the blond elf intently.
"The calling in of a favour."
~*~
The Stafia wish you to respect their authority and over all omnipotence by leaving a review. Please remember we have eyes everywhere including in our eye sockets.