Disclaimer: I don't own Spongebob Squarepants. If I did then Squidward will have more better days.
Voyage to Save The Krabby Patty
Where It All Begun
In Bikini Bottom, on the seafloor of Bikini Atoll, a pair of best friends were having yet another day of their lives. They spent the day trying to net some jellyfish, only to get stung terribly on their faces, then they brushed their teeth in front of a mirror store and went to a clothing store for pants big enough to fit their legs through. Finally, they waddled over to the supermarket and to its frozen food section; that was where their favorite food can be found, ice-cream!
They were Spongebob Squarepants and Patrick Star, the two dumbest and childish residents of Bikini Bottom. Patrick was a starfish and it has been proven that starfish have no brains, which would explain a lot about Patrick. As for Spongebob, he was a real child-in-a-man type of character; while he lives alone with a pet and holds a job, Spongebob is as naïve and clueless as a common ignoramus.
But these two didn't care what others said about them. All that mattered to this duo was that they were best buds since forever and hoped to never feel otherwise. But that will be dashed when Spongebob hatched an idea seeing another customer buy boxes of frozen crab meat and commented on how 'convenient' the food was. All he had to say was, "Can you imagine if frozen Krabby Patties were sold at supermarkets?"
From there, everything was barely different. Spongebob had his idea heard by his penny-pinching old crab of a boss, Eugene H. Krabs, and they started to sell the idea to a shady business manager. Apparently, before they can start making frozen Krabby Patties, Spongebob's favorite food to eat and cook, a 'filter ingredient' had to be used in the food.
This upset Spongebob. He loved Krabby Patties to the point that he saw them as a recipe from the gods; to him, Krabby Patties were prefect and without the need to be cooked any other way. He begged his boss to reconsider but the shady business man found it so easy to change the little sponge's mind. Of course, that was when the check came in for the sales of the Frozen Krabby Patties for that very day; the zeros made Mr. Krabs faint. And Spongebob saw from that moment, Mr. Krabs was 'sold' on the business and there is no talking him out of it.
And things just got worse from that moment on. When Frozen Krabby Patties took the ocean floor country by storm, not literally, it was time for a mascot for the franchise. And they chose Patrick, who quickly became a star for advertising Frozen Krabby Patties. Spongebob was proud that his friend had gotten so successful but later learned that stars had no time for friends, only fame and fans.
The last straw came when Spongebob tried to go to his favorite restaurant to cook some genuine Krabby Patties, the Krusty Krab. But Mr. Krabs got there first and turned the restaurant into something of a museum. And Spongebob was fired as the sole cook and rehired to be the owner and sole tour director for the Krusty Krab Museum. Icing on the cake was the other former employee at the Krusty Krab, and the unhappiest creature under the sea, Squidward Tentacles; he was also fired and was left with nothing to hire him back for. The octopus, despite his name, decided to try at his 'dreams'.
Needless to say, Spongebob took everything pretty hard. All it took was an innocent idea for this little sponge to lose his job, his favorite place, his best friend and the boss he saw as a father figure. However, it wasn't long before Squidward showed up again; he said that dreams were out of his reach, for anyone who spent up seventeen years as a cashier that is. With nowhere else to go for a job, Squidward practically begged to work with Spongebob.
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This brings to the present,
"…What do you 1.99$? Aren't you going to squish me into paste? I have the secret Krabby Patty Formula right here!" Spongebob was having a rather annoying little pest to deal with; Sheldon J. Plankton, the former business rival to the Krusty Krab. And this miniature menace has spent every evil plan imaginable to get the source of the Krusty Krab's success so he can finally have customers.
"Anyone can have the Secret Formula." Spongebob replied deadpan, "We sell copies here in the giftshop." And Spongebob took a merchandize bottle and emptied it to show that the paper inside had a very small message, saying that this formula is fake. "Everything here is fake." Spongebob added, tearing it up and letting it settle on the ground; barely anyone visits the museum so littering is not such a big deal.
"What has this mad world come to!?" Plankton took the hint and shattered the bottle and not even bothering to real the paper among the glass shards. "Just give me one of your Krabby Patties." And Spongebob took one from the museum refrigerator and gave it three minutes to heat up. Upon handing it over to Plankton, the little nuisance turned evil genius and took it with a laugh and a mocking; not that Spongebob seemed to care.
"Should we let him know that he forgot to pay for that patty?" Squidward came with yet another patty, his mood finally matching with Spongebob's.
"What's the difference?" Spongebob retorted with glum and took the patty from Squidward's hands. "These Frozen Krabby Patties had ruined my life in just one day. And to think that I came up with the idea." Spongebob used to think that happiness and a positive attitude will make the world friendlier and solve any problem; but this seemed to be the one exception.
"Might as well see what has gotten everyone so excited." Spongebob took a bite out of the patty and the taste hit him hard, like a building on your head. And the little sponge vomited out enough sand to make a sandcastle, shovel included. "Sand!?"
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"From the ocean floor all around Bikini Bottom, painted to look like patties and modified to cook in a heater." Squidward responded. "This is, of course, the filter used to make Krabs so rich and the starfish so famous."
"NO! This is all nothing but a sham, a scam and a business that lies!" Spongebob shouted out! "How dare they lie to us all! This has to stop, now!" Spongebob already threw his hat down and got ready to run out of the museum, when Squidward stopped him.
"No, we are not." Squidward said firmly. But of course, Spongebob tried to get free; it was a rathe comical sight since Spongebob couldn't even pull gum off the ground with his rubber arms. "I'm serious Spongebob. You've got your heart in the right place but should you tell everyone the truth right off the bat, then no one will ever eat Krabby Patties, your boss will never hire you again and you may never be friends with that starfish every again."
That scared Spongebob, even more than everything that led up from the freezer section of the supermarket. "Now listen. Mr. Krabs is benefiting from the sales of these Frozen Krabby Patties and once everyone finds out that the food was nothing but sand, he will lose every cent he owned." Squidward started to get this into the sponge's head. "Everyone who bought one of these fake patties will sue Mr. Krabs a lawsuit for each one; it is either that Mr. Krabs will have to go to jail or pay for the lawsuits. And those can charge up to double the price for each Frozen Krabby Patties." Spongebob tried to calculate that with his math skills and knew that the debit will be deeper than heat vents. "Will that penny-pinching old crab you look up to will appreciate it when you tell the truth and cause him to be penniless?"
Spongebob still was speechless and imagined Mr. Krabs in rags, glaring and screaming at him for causing the business to crash and the old crab to be on the streets. "Next, once you tell everyone that the Frozen Krabby Patties are really sand, then all ocean creatures will naturally think that they had been eating tasteful sand that you cooked up." Spongebob nearly screamed at the thought. "That is why nobody will ever want another Krabby Patty, they think it is another scam and a waste of their money. You almost ruined the Krusty Krab and the Krabby Patty name if you did spread the truth."
Spongebob felt like his heart turned lead and almost fell out through the chest. And Squidward continued, "Finally the starfish. He became famous because of the scam. He got fans galore, all the ice cream he couldn't have being your best friend and lived in luxury unlike when he was your neighbor and living under a rock."
"He doesn't mind…" Spongebob tried to speak up but Squidward scowled him to shut up. It was amusing to everyone on how loyal and child-minded Spongebob was to his friends but it was getting rather annoying to show the sponge how to be mature about the situation.
"The point I am making here is that when you tell the truth about Krabby Patties, then not only will the starfish lose his fame, but also his right to live in our cities." Spongebob didn't know how much more of this he could take. "Everyone knows the starfish by now and sees him as the face of the scam. In other words, everyone will think that the starfish was one of the scammers, like that shady business fish and Mr. Krabs. When you are scammed once, you remember the face of the scammer and never trust them again."
Silence reigned in that gift shop as Squidward finally released Spongebob and let the sponge to fall to the ground, tearing up. This time, Spongebob had no clue on what to do and the only thing he could do was cry about it. "Now you can do two things; stay where you are and cry like a baby or you can help me in a plan I made that I am sure you will be happy to work with."
"Why?" Spongebob croaked on the floor, in a tone that Squidward hadn't heard in a while. "Why are you breaking my heart! Why are you talking urchins about my boss, my favorite food and worse of all, my best friend? What had they done to you!?"
"Plenty." Squidward said plainly. "I only work here because I am cheap and Mr. Krabs love to be cheap more than he loves his own daughter, as much as he loves money. He takes delights in treating us as trash or else lower because he knows I can't work anywhere else and you are just the guy that doesn't mind be treated like a prisoner."
"Mr. Krabs does love me! He said that I am the son he never had and always wanted! And he lets me makes my favorite food and you should be graceful that he hires you!" Spongebob retorted and Squidward actually agreed with him.
"I was at one point until you moved in and instantly became the cook that made Mr. Krabs more money then he ever did with just me. That really hurt Spongebob." Squidward responded and Spongebob had nothing to say to that. "My point is that I have seen Mr. Krabs give up his restaurant if it met to get a penny more. Do you remember Krusty Tower? Krabby Land? Or when he forced you to try and sell a moldy patty from under the grill? He even sold you for pocket change in the blink of his weedy eyes."
"Yes, I do and so what?!" Spongebob was now in complete tears at how Squidward is talking about his former boss. "He always said that he is claws deep in bills and needs the extra money to pay! Are you saying that he is a liar!?"
"Only if he is paying his bills with the money he squeezes out of our beings." Squidward responded and waited for Spongebob to do so. Instead, silence was the answer and Squidward nodded. "Thought so. You still look up to that old crab who is swimming in his money while his best employees have to work this joint that barely gets any business any better than the Chum Bucket. I thought you put pride in your work, meaning you have pride in that yellow body. Do you have pride in working for a greedy and abusive boss like him?"
"No." Squidward hid his smirk, he was actually enjoying this and Spongebob used to ruin his fun by just being in the same room.
"Listen Spongebob. You may not care about money, only making the food and serving smiles to the customers. But when you are treated lower than trash, you only have one thing to cherish; your dignity, your honor!" Squidward proclaimed, "I am saying that Mr. Krabs took away your money, your friends and your favorite thing to do above all else but don't let him take away your dignity. Don't let that penny-pinching old crab take away your dignity as an honest and hard-working citizen of Bikini Bottom with this scam."
"I understand." Spongebob spoke with the same glum as before. "So, what do you have planned?" Squidward chuckled and merely signaled for Spongebob to follow him through the door into the kitchen. Inside, Squidward approached the check-in clock and set the hands to a certain time, which triggered a trap door and revealed a tube of sorts.
Once they landed on their feet at the end of the tube, it was a dark room and Spongebob was wary of it; he still feared the dark anything that can live in it. But Squidward didn't mind the dark and simply reached for a large lever switch. "Did you really think that I spent all night waiting for you to open the door and trip over my feet?" Squidward spoke within the darkness, which helped hide his devious smile. Once he pulled the large switch, the entire Krusty Krab Museum started to shake.
Outside, the streets were still empty with everyone in their homes waiting for their Frozen Krabby Patties to fully cook. And somehow, they didn't notice that the museum was shaking and emerging from the ocean floor. Underneath the Krusty Krab Museum was something of the bottom half of a submarine. But once the machine got out of the seafloor, the Museum morphed into something of a submarine and a crab trap fused together.
And yet this was not noticed by the citizens of Bikini Bottom as the strange vehicle started to move over the road. Inside, Squidward was driving the vehicle while Spongebob was in awe at the contraption; his eyes no longer filled with tears or heartbreak. "Spongebob, meet the Krusty Krab Express. Just a little thing that I wiped together overnight. It also helped that the submarine you discovered a while along was somehow still in one piece."
"You are a genius, Squidward! This is the Krusty Krab on the road again, only for real!" Spongebob pressed his face into the glass to admire the view. The vehicle was moving at an attitude that it will go over the largest of trucks. "But how is this going to help Krabby Patties?"
"Be patient. As inventive as this vehicle is, I had only last night tot make it." Squidward responded. "We have one more stop before we start our plan. And, for a hint, the Krusty Krab can't work with just two, only with three." And Spongebob then saw a certain large clear glass dome ahead.
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This was the home of the only 'airbreather' in Bikini Bottom, Sandy Cheeks. She was a squirrel from Texas, a fact that she was proud enough to kill anyone who insults the state. And when she is not on a rampage against Texas haters, she is a smart and strong character and a good friend. In fact, she is smart enough to understand any form of science and able to construct anything that ruins on nutty butter; and Sandy is strong enough to shatter boulders and kick anchors several meters away.
Right now, she was in her water-breathing suit and working on the Krusty Krab Express. "Good thing you came over, Squidward. This contraption needs some minor adjustments and refueling before it can leave Bikini Bottom." (1) And in no time flat, Sandy made the vehicle look even better than before. "But seriously, why did you got through the problem of asking me for how to turn a museum into a submarine yesterday? It is no like I am the only engineer, inventor or mechanic in town."
"It is because you are going with us on this voyage." Squidward answered which made Spongebob more excited while Sandy acted like this was the first time she was made aware of the fact. "For a while there was this thing between you two that I can't wait any longer to happen. And I though that since we rarely ever leave Bikini Bottom, seeing the rest of the ocean floor might be good for us."
Spongebob noticed that Sandy's checks were red and she tried to cover those up with her hands, rather difficult with the helmet on. Speaking of which, "I appreciate the thought but isn't it obvious as why I cannot spend more than an hour outside my dome." Sandy turned to face, nothing. "MY BIO-DOME!"
Turning around frantically, Sandy found what looked like a glass sphere attached to the Krusty Krab Express by a steel arm. "If I didn't know better, I say you are doing this to convince me to come along." Squidward shrugged his shoulders,
"I can't take all the credit and you can't blame either of us from trying." Squidward responded and made a light elbow jab into Spongebob's side, whom is still looking sheepish. "Anyways, we need to brief you on what we are going to do. If we do this right, everyone will get their money back and Mr. Krabs and the starfish will get off the hook about this whole scam." Sandy had nothing to lose and listened in.
Later that day, the Krusty Krab Express was loaded and readied to hit the ocean floor road. All there is left is to start up the engine and get the show on the road. "Don't worry Spongebob. We will restore the name to the Krabby Patty and we are going to do it bit-by-bit, city-by-city." Squidward said as he sat in the driver's seat, turned the keys to ignition and pressed the gas pedal. Spongebob just walked over and leaned on the seat. Sandy did the same on the other side of the driver's seat.
She then looked to the downhearted sponge and rubbed the top of his head. "Don't worry too much, Spongebob. We will fix this. As long as we are together, we can do anything." Spongebob let out of a sigh and faced the sunset that they were driving towards.
"Okay guys. I'm ready."
End of Chapter 1.
*Hello everyone! This was my version on how the episode 'Goodbye Krabby Patty?' was going to end. And by that, I am turning it into a complete story. I know that I am making Squidward a little more smart, mature and considerate but I personally think he can be more mature than on the show. All flamers will be ignored, thank you!*
1. I am no good at accents so forgive me for not giving Sandy one from Texas.