I have a bad feeling about this...
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own Star Wars.
In some ways I feel really good about this... and in others not so much. I admit it was really difficult to write Qui-Gon (but I just had to include him) and I sort of have a negative view of the Jedi Order and even *gasp* Yoda himself, which is evident in the beginning. But I really did enjoy writing this :)
I love reviews!
Anakin: You and Satine have a history.
Obi-Wan: An extended mission when I was younger.... Master Qui-Gon and I spent a year on Mandalore, protecting the Duchess from insurgents who had threatened her world. They sent bounty hunters after us. We were always on the run. Living hand-to-mouth. Never sure what the next day would bring.
Anakin: Sounds romantic.
The Clone Wars, Voyage of Temptation.
The Republic had gone too far. Not that they hadn't already gone too far, but now it was really hitting home.
Word had reached the Council of Neutral Systems that the Republic was now taking an interest in Mandalore. It was only a faint whisper at first, but it was soon confirmed that the Republic was launching an investigation. The Council was outraged, but no one was as angry as the Council's leader, Duchess Satine Kryze.
Satine had received a hologram from Yoda himself, stating that a Jedi would be arriving on Mandalore in two days at noon to investigate a rumor that Mandalore was building an army for the Confederacy of Independent Systems. Even though his sentences were unorthodox, he said this clearly as a statement, not a request.
Satine narrowed her eyes. "I do not appreciate being treated as if I have to answer to the Republic, Master Yoda. I am not encroaching into your affairs, you are. If the Republic insists that Mandalore is a threat and wants to investigate this ridiculous claim, very well, but you will do so on the time that is convenient to me."
If Yoda was angered by her frankness, he did not show it. Satine was not surprised however. There is no emotion.... "Understandable, this is, Duchess. Convenient for you, what time is?"
Satine invented a day and time, even though the original proposed day would have been fine. "And what Jedi should I be expecting?" she added offhandedly.
"Master Obi-Wan Kenobi."
Satine searched Yoda's face for a moment for some emotion somewhere, but found none. Of course. "Very well."
Yoda had probably given the assignment to Obi-Wan because he remembered that Obi-Wan and his former master Qui-Gon spent a year on Mandalore protecting her from rebels threatening to destroy her dream of a peaceful Mandalorian society. Or maybe it was just the galaxy playing a joke on her.
Either way, she would be seeing Obi-Wan for the first time in many years.
She was only sixteen years old when she had been elected. Mandalore elected their leaders at a young age, and they stayed in office for thirty-five years. Since the elections only occurred two or three times in the average Mandalorian's lifetime, the elections were a gigantic event. And sometimes, things got downright violent. When Satine won the election over her two main competitors, all hell broke loose. She was the first elected official to advocate peace instead of warrior ways. With her in charge, Mandalore was going to change, and her radical non-supporters knew it. So, they set about the only way to solve the situation they could think of: assassinate her.
And then two Jedi Knights came to her aid in the name of peace. Master Qui-Gon Jinn and his padawan learner, Obi-Wan Kenobi, who was only a year older than her.
Watching the speeders fly by outside of her window, Satine was lost in memory and thought.
"Am I even doing the right thing?" her sixteen-year-old self had asked aloud one night. Normally, she seemed so sure about herself, but not this night. "My people are dying, and they're dying because of me. This planet is in worse condition than it was when I was elected!"
"Sometimes peace is met with violence at first, but it's important to stand strong," a sullen seventeen-year-old Obi-Wan answered in the darkness.
Her two protectors had intrigued her. They were like no other people she had met before. They were always speaking with an air of deliberateness, and they were always calm. Even when they were in danger, they both stared down the possibility of death, unwavering. They were always getting funny feelings, which mostly turned out to be correct. And they were both very quiet and tranquil. Obi-Wan in particular could stare ahead of him at the scenery for hours at a time without moving an inch.
Even though Obi-Wan was clearly the student, he seemed to not have much to learn, at least not to Satine. He was mature and as calm as his master was. However, he was always asking Qui-Gon questions, and he always did whatever he was told.
"How did you decide you wanted to be a Jedi?"
A small smile flickered over Obi-Wan's face. "I did not ever make that decision, Duchess. One cannot simply go up to the Jedi Temple and apply for a master. Jedi are selected just months after birth and raised in the Temple after they turn two or three. One can always quit, but very few do."
"Oh?" She looked at him quizzically. "And how is it decided who qualifies to be a Jedi and who doesn't?"
"Midi-chlorian counts by taking blood. Only those with a very high count can be a Jedi."
"I think that -" Satine stopped short. The only thing that could be heard was the patter of rain on the leaky roof. They had taken shelter in an abandoned shack. Qui-Gon was off looking for something - of which now Satine could not remember. And Obi-Wan was asleep on the floor.
He could not be very comfortable curled up on the hard dirt floor, but he seemed to be sleeping peacefully. She wished she could throw some kind of blanket over him, but they had nothing except the clothes on their backs.
There was something mesmerizing about him as he slept. As Satine noted the features and details on his face, she realized that he really was quite attractive. She looked away and tried to push that thought out of her head.
She was not even sure if the Jedi were allowed to have relationships. Their "Code" they went by seemed to be rather strict.
Satine cursed and fell onto the rocky ground, scraping her knees and palms.
"Satine!" Obi-Wan shouted, the wind muffling his voice. He crouched down next to her. "What happened?"
"Nothing," she shouted back, trying to stand and run again. But she couldn't. She looked at her left ankle. It was twisted at the joint, painful, and already swollen. She cursed again.
"Obi-Wan, get her out of here!" Qui-Gon shouted, swinging his green lightsaber about.
Obi-Wan scooped her up and began to carry her away to safety as quickly as he could, much to her protest. "Put me down, I can run myself!" she demanded. He ignored her.
Then he slipped himself, dropping her. Thankfully, she landed on her right hip rather than her left foot. But it still left an awful scrape on the skin near her hip bone, and she gritted her teeth as blood began to ooze out.
"Satine, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." Obi-Wan was blushing and apologizing profusely now as he picked her up off the rocky ground again. "I'll go slower this time - it won't happen again, I'm sorry."
"Do you think Qui-Gon will be all right?" she asked once Obi-Wan put her down on the grass, now safely away from danger.
"Yes. He'll be fine." She wasn't sure how he could be so confident, but she believed he was sure. "The only one who's in danger right now is you. That's why I have got to stay here."
"I'm fine," she snapped. "Go help your master."
"I can't do that.... He would be most displeased with me for leaving you unprotected." He didn't let it show that he wanted nothing more than to help his master, but Satine still knew this was exactly what he was thinking.
She squared her jaw in irritation. "You didn't have to carry me out you know. And I didn't tell you that you could take off my shoe," she added as he gingerly pulled her left shoe off.
"You've broken your ankle terribly, and maybe some other parts of your foot. It's already swollen twice its normal size."
"Well, I would say your head is twice the normal size too," she grumbled.
"Very funny." He then sighed. "This complicates things. You need medical attention if this is going to heal properly."
They then sat in silence for a long while as Satine's foot throbbed unpleasantly and continued to swell. Her hip also continued to sting. As if he could feel her discomfort, he looked at her regrettably.
"I'm sorry," he said yet again. "I was never good at Healing."
"I'm all right," she mumbled.
Once Qui-Gon joined the party, he immediately examined her foot, which was now turning a lovely shade of purple. "Your foot is broken," he announced. "You need medical attention. This complicates things."
"So I've heard," she sighed, trying to not roll her eyes. "If you both just give me a moment, I think I can get up -"
"Don't be silly, Duchess," Qui-Gon said. "No one could walk on that."
Obi-Wan picked her up off the ground. "We need to find somewhere you can be healed," Qui-Gon continued. "Padawan, do you have any feelings of which direction we should go?"
"I sense we should go that way, Master," Obi-Wan said, giving his head a jerk to the right of him.
"I sense it too," Qui-Gon agreed.
And with that, they set off. During their search for help, Satine's irritation eventually faded. She looked up at Obi-Wan, and the gray-blue eyes looked down at her. She gave him a small smile and then rested her head against his arm and closed her eyes, feeling her heart thumping.
"Obi-Wan, can I ask you a question?"
He looked at her in slight alarm, but nodded anyway.
"What is the Code?"
"Oh. Well, it's a five line mantra that states the basic founding beliefs of the Jedi Order."
"What does it say?"
"There is no emotion, there is peace. There is no ignorance, there is knowledge. There is no passion, there is serenity. There is no chaos, there is harmony. There is no death, there is the Force." Obi-Wan began breaking a twig into smaller pieces. "It's what gives us our rules and expectations for all Jedi."
Satine was silent for a while. "No passion, no emotion?"
"No passion, no emotion," Obi-Wan echoed, still breaking the twig. "Of course, no one can be emotionless, but it's important that we remain level-headed and not be carried away by our feelings."
"But some emotions are good," Satine argued. "Passion can be too. So long as passion does not become obsession."
Obi-Wan shrugged slightly. "I suppose, sometimes. But for the most part, it only clouds one's judgement."
"Well, what about love? Isn't that supposed to be the greatest of all emotions?"
"Love is attachment," Obi-Wan answered softly, not looking at her. "Attachment is forbidden. Nothing and no one is permanent. The moment you become attached to someone is the moment you condemn yourself to misery and suffering."
Satine said nothing for a while again. Then, "How many times have you rehearsed that, Obi-Wan?"
Obi-Wan blinked. "I'm sorry?"
"How many times have you rehearsed what you just said. You sound like you're repeating a passage from a textbook."
Obi-Wan didn't answer at first. The conversation no longer seemed as mechanical. "Well, Jedi Masters repeat themselves a lot when they're speaking to their Padawans, I guess. It rubs off."
"Sounds like brainwashing to me."
"It's not," Obi-Wan said firmly. It seemed she had just struck a nerve. "It's just... very important to remember."
"You cannot possibly be serious."
Satine turned toward Obi-Wan. "I am serious. You cannot possibly think I would ever say something I don't mean to say."
"But these are the people who were trying to kill you just last month! These are the people who are killing those in your government!"
"I am perfectly aware of who they are, Kenobi," Satine snapped. "What I'm not aware of is why you are questioning my judgment."
Obi-Wan opened his mouth furiously, but Qui-Gon cut over him. "We are not here to dictate how the Duchess decides to run her planet, Obi-Wan."
"Yes, Master," Obi-Wan said curtly as a reflex.
"However, I must also express my concerns about this matter, Satine. I do not think this is a good idea. The people you are planning on speaking with are nothing short of terrorists. I have a hard time believing they have had a change in heart. However, we will protect and support you regardless, of course."
"Terrorists or not, they have requested a peaceful meeting with me. They have asked for forgiveness. I cannot turn a deaf ear on their pleas."
"How do you know they won't blow the building up as soon as they are in the same room as you?" Obi-Wan shot at her. "How do you know they won't just shoot you?"
"I don't know. But if this situation can be solved peaceably, then that is what will happen. I will never support killing in the name of peace."
"Do you really think you and the terrorists will be able to shake hands and become good friends?" Obi-Wan asked furiously. "And let me tell you, if you think that -"
"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon said firmly. He glared at his padawan.
Obi-Wan glared back for a moment. Then he turned toward her and gave a little bow. "Forgive me, Duchess," he said softly. And with that, he turned and walked out the room without looking back.
Snow was falling lightly outside. Satine shivered as she stood in front of the window. The abandoned house they were in was not very warm. This planet was far too cold.
"Are you all right?"
Satine closed her eyes. Obi-Wan was always asking her that question. "Yes, I'm fine. A bit cold, but fine otherwise."
Obi-Wan walked over next to her a the window. "You shouldn't stand at the window."
Satine smiled weakly. "Because a bounty hunter might materialize out of nowhere, recognize me, and shoot or capture me?"
"Something like that, yes."
"I am not afraid of dying."
"I know you aren't. But you can't help people if you're dead. And I would rather prefer you be alive." He put a hand on her shoulder to try to steer her away.
She turned and looked into the gray-blue eyes she had come to know so well. Before she knew what she was doing, she pulled him into an embrace. He put his arms around her as well. She rested her head against his shoulder and closed her eyes. They stayed that way for a long time. When they finally broke apart, Obi-Wan kissed her before she could register what he was about to do.
In... and out. In... and out. Satine was trying to slow her breathing and calm herself. The Jedi made being calm look far too easy....
Obi-Wan's breathing was deep and slow, unlike her shallow breaths. It was in a perfect rhythm, whereas hers was somewhat erratic.
The dead of night was the hardest time for Satine. The silence and stillness made her feel slightly claustrophobic. During the day time, during the struggle to survive, Satine was able to push her worries aside. But at night time, when there was nothing to distract her, she felt trapped inside her own skull.
Obi-Wan began to rub his hand against her shoulder. Distracted, she raised her head from his chest slightly to look at him. His breathing had been so steady that she thought he was sound asleep.
"You're letting worry get the better of you," he whispered, his eyes still closed. "Just relax. Dawn will be here before you know it. I've got you."
"I don't know what you're talking about," Satine lied as she put her head back down against him.
He continued to run his hand over her back for a long while. She had to admit to herself that it was soothing. It was times like these Satine felt a thousand words were being passed between them despite their complete silence.
"Oh, just shut up, Obi," Satine yawned.
Qui-Gon looked over at his apprentice. "'Obi?'" he said slightly incredulously.
"She calls me that sometimes..."
Satine stood in shock. Obi-Wan was panting heavily, absolutely furious, his lightsaber still illuminating the night with blue. He kicked the blaster away from the dead bounty hunters hand. He was quaking in anger. He fumbled trying to get his comlink out. "Master. I've found them. Bounty hunter's dead. We're on the east side of the lake."
Silence. Satine did not know what to say.
"Are you all right?" Obi-Wan asked. He looked at her with absolute concern.
"I - yes." She stammered. He came over and pulled her close, muttering something about being sorry. Anger seemed to leap into her, and she pushed him away roughly. "Why the hell did you just do that?" she demanded.
He looked at her incredulously. "He was shooting at me! And he had you, he was going to take you to the damn leaders of the rebellion against you so they could do Force only knows what kind of awful death -"
"You didn't need to kill him!"
Qui-Gon came running toward them. Obi-Wan did not acknowledge him. Instead, he was glaring at Satine as if he was ready to tear his short hair out in frustration if he could have. "You - cannot - I can't believe - !" he stuttered.
"What happened here."
Obi-Wan looked over at his master. Instantly mollified, he looked down at the ground and swallowed hard. "I saved Duchess Satine, Master," he said, kicking at the soil.
"You murdered him."
Obi-Wan looked at her, his rage returning. "He was threatening to kill you and he was trying to kill me!" he shrieked. "What else could I have done? Let him shoot you?"
"Obi-Wan, I would expect a lot more self-control from you." Qui-Gon was speaking softly, but sternly. He had a gift for speaking quietly and making people pay undivided attention so they didn't miss a word of what he was saying. "You and I will talk about this later. But for no, there's no good in standing fighting over something that is already done. This bounty hunter probably has friends - friends we do not want to have to meet. For everyone's safety, we need to move on."
"Yes, Master," Obi-Wan said meekly to the ground. Satine could not stop staring at him. Perhaps their Code is there for a reason after all.
"Everything will be all right now.... Your people will be safe. Mandalore has an excellent leader."
She looked at him with an expressionless gaze. "Yes, I sincerely hope so." An outsider would think they were strangers. "I cannot begin to thank you for your help, both of you." Her eyes flickered over to Qui-Gon, but went back to Obi-Wan's face almost instantly. "Every one of my people are forever in your debt."
Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan bowed their heads. Obi-Wan looked at her one last time, as if in apology. She figured her expression looked the same. And then they both turned their backs. She would most likely never see either one again.
Satine stood still, staring in the direction their ship disappeared. She stood like that for a long time. And then she turned around. Being the Duchess of Mandalore meant there was no time to cry.