Alright, so I found this picture on Tumblr that I swear to Buddha was my character, Austin, to a friggen T and paired it with this one time my best friend and I decided to paint my dresser...
Dedicated to Rachel who puts up with me sending her bits and pieces for approval. Also, to Tyler because as high as we were on paint fumes and as much as it burned to get pixie stix up my nose.. I wouldn't trade it or you for all the tea in China.
Disclaimer: I own not.
"You're supposed to be helping me paint this wall now get your damn lazy ass up off my couch, put down my beer, and frigging help me, Daniel." Austin Hawthorne glared at her best friend over her shoulder as she rolled the dark green paint onto her living room walls. Danny Messer eyed his friend of over twenty years for a moment, trying to gauge her anger, before placing the beer on the coffee table and moving to help.
He grabbed the brush and let a few drops of the sticky paint land on his fingers before leaning over and leaving his forest green finger print on her arm, "I am giving up my day off to help you, you could be a tad more appreciative, Graceless."
"Jerk." She flung the excess paint on her brush at him.
"You did not just fling paint at me."
"Oh yeah?" Austin dunked her hand into the bucket of paint, pulling out a hand coated in green goop that she proceeded to smear diagonally across Danny's old NYPD shirt.
Danny gaped for a moment before grabbing the half-empty tray of paint and dumping it onto Austin's thick mess of chocolate curls, "Payback is a bitch, Austin."
"I cannot believe you!" She grabbed the partial bucket of paint from the floor as Danny began to sprint around the couch, Austin hot on his heels. As Danny's socked feet hit the tarp they had laid down, he slid and fell to his stomach as Austin tripped over him, landing on his back, paint covering both of them and part of the carpet, "My carpet!"
"I'll buy you a new carpet if you just get off my back." He groaned as he pushed up and she rolled off, right into the paint.
"These jeans were new." She screeched and sat up, her butt still resting in the puddle of Sherman William's finest forest green. Glancing down at them and realizing that they were now a lost cause, her lower lip sneaked out and she gave her best friend a look of sadness.
"Okay," Danny relented, "I owe you a new living room carpet and a pair of jeans. Why on earth did you wear brand new jeans to paint. With me. You know that we can't be trusted alone with anything that can cause damage."
"I know," Austin sighed and scooped up some of the excess paint to fling at him, "I'm surprised Don didn't wrap us in bubble wrap before he left."
Lindsay and Danny had volunteered to help the Flacks' repaint their living room during their mandatory time off. Lindsay was going to be joining them after she finished filling out papers for a court case that was pending and Flack had volunteered to take Lucy and Justin to the park. Justin was Austin and Don's four year old son who was best friends with the Messers' only child.
"That's cause he had to keep your son from mauling my daughter." Danny fired back as he placed his whole hand into the paint before placing a hand print on Austin's face.
Austin rolled her eyes as she gave him a set of war stripes, "Jus was not mauling Luce, Bub, you need to face facts that my boy has a crush on your daughter."
"Why do they have to take after us so much?"
"It's harmless." Austin rolled her eyes, "B'side, we grew out of our crushes, Danny."
"Yeah, otherwise you woulda grown up and married Kirk Cameron."
"Shut up, Daniel Dominic." She growled playfully, "Lindsay doesn't know about your insane crush on Farah Fawcett... yet."
"Let's face it," Danny sighed and fell back on the tarp and Austin laid beside him, "We have too many secrets on one another."
"Ya think, Genius."
"Keep being mean to me, Graceless, I dare ya."
She turned on her side and looked at him, "You love me, Messer, you wouldn't trade me for damn near anything."
"Would I let anyone else climb through my bedroom window for ten years, share an apartment for another five, and then help get through the police academy?" Danny asked, recounting every kind thing he had done for her during their friendship.
"Lindsay."
Danny rolled his eyes, "Anyone in this room with whom I am not hitched?"
"I love you, Daniel Dominic Messer."
"I love you too, Austin Grace Flack." He laughed as without thinking they did their old secret handshake. Side five, backhand side five, fist bump her hand on top, fist bump his hand on top, regular fist bump, 'lame cool guy handshake'.
"Hey, remember that..." She trailed off.
His train of thought picked up where hers left off, "Oh yeah, that was a fun weekend."
"I don't think we had ever gotten in so much trouble though." She giggled and he laughed at her giggling. The two of them went together like a pair of old, dirty socks that were comfortable and warm. No one else understood the things they found to be funny or why certain moments in their life had brought them to tears. Their spouses had long since given up on trying to understand them and their children emulated the friendship they shared.
The front door opened and Don Flack stood beside Lindsay Messer each with a child on their hip. Austin looked between the two of them and then back at Danny, "You think this is bad? You should see the other guy."
Danny and Austin collapsed into fits of laughter as Flack turned to Lindsay, "I told you that they cannot be trusted alone with things like paint."
"Get it right, Baby," Austin called through her laughter, "We can't be trusted alone. Period."
Lucy yanked on Lindsay's hair, "Mommy? What's so funny?"
"Oh, nothing, Lu." Lindsay chuckled and set the six year old down, "It's like the other day when Mommy walked into the room and you were laughing with Justin and wouldn't tell me why."
"Oooh." Lucy nodded emphatically, "Okay."
Hearing this, Danny sat up and pointed his finger at Justin, "You, Boy, keep your giggles to yourself and away from my daughter."
"Kiss 'er Jus!" Austin cried as she tackled Danny.
"You know," Lindsay chuckled, "We were thinking that since you two had worked so hard on this living room that we would go out to a nice dinner as adults, but... well, I guess it's just gonna be Flack and I now. A steak, Donald?"
"Hey!" Austin sat up, hair in disarray and lower lip jutted out, "The Duck is mine! You're the one that has to put up with this heathen." She pointed her thumb towards Danny as he sneezed snot and green paint.
Lindsay found herself giggling from the fumes, "Did either of you Smartasses think of crackin' a window in this joint?"
"I TOLD YOU WE FORGOT SOMETHING!" Danny hollered as he fell back against the tarp and knocked over the full bucket of paint.
"DAMMIT, DANNY!"
Danny cringed, "Okay, I owe you new baseboards as well."
"Lucy, Justin, attack!" Flack ordered as the two children took off across the floor and slid onto the paint covered tarp like it was a slip'n'slide covered in water in the middle of July. Danny gave Justin a paint filled noogie while Austin put green streaks into her goddaughter's hair.
"Oh a painting we will go..." Austin began and the two children joined in her chorus as Danny stood up. Making his way across the floor, he left a trail of paint foot prints behind him before he scooped up his protesting wife and dropped her unceremoniously into the largest puddle of paint. Flack shook his head before voluntarily joining the group, letting Justin give him war stripes and Lucy spike his hair with her paint covered hands.
"Grab your brush and grab your rollers..." Austin and Lindsay belted out the song that they had learned from many girls nights spent watching Gilmore Girls. Danny and Flack immediately placed paint covered hands over their wives' mouths. Lindsay bit Danny's hand while Austin merely pulled her husband in for a kiss.
"Blah!" Flack pulled away, face all contorted and wiping his tongue on the back of his shirt, "Sherman Williams is not meant to be used as Chapstick! This... oh...." He gagged and Austin giggled maniacally.
Lucy and Justin sat by the base of the wall as they traced silly pictures into the paint. Flack was dumping paint down the front of Austin's shirt while Lindsay and Danny wrestled, effectively knocking over the remaining paint. Turning to her best friend, Lucy Messer sighed dramatically and rolled her eyes, "Parents. They're crazy, Jussy."
"Mhmm." Four year old, Justin Daniel Flack nodded the affirmative.
Twenty-five years ago Austin Flack had looked at Danny Messer with the same grin as they had smashed their hands into the fresh cement that the city had used to put a sidewalk in their neighborhood in the Bronx. All these years later, their children looked at one another while laughing before slapping their paint covered hands against a white section of the wall.