Here is the link to NotToBeMessedWith's story.
/s/3848396/23/
The Makeover
Authored by Browneyedbella347
Bella:
La di da... hmm. I
think I'll wake up now in the arms of my gorgeous vampire
lover.
-wakes up-
Edward: Good morning, precious. -pets Bella's
hair creepily-
Bella: Um, hello Edward. What shall we do this fine
day?
-Alice appears out of nowhere-
Alice: Bella! Let me do
your hair, make-up, and dress you, even though you are a functioning
human who has been dressing herself for the past 18 years!
Bella:
Not another make-over!
Alice: Muhahaha!
Edward: Shut up Bella,
just let her make you yummy.
Bella: Dammit. Fine.
-several
hours, random nonexistent beauty products, and skanky clothes that
Bella would never wear later-
Bella: I'm gorgeous!
Edward: I am
consumed with passion
-acts like a horny teenager, even though he
respects Bella, is 108, and has promised to wait till
marriage-
Everybody: YAY!
The Bikini
Authored by Browneyedbella347
Alice:
Here, Bella, wear this bikini. Because it is a summer day that it is
randomly freakin' hot in Forks and we know of a secret place to go
swimming.
Bella: -gasp-
Alice: Do you like the blue bikini that
I picked out for you? Yes, I say blue because that is the only color
that you are allowed to wear since Edward thinks it makes you look
smexy.
Bella: -Gasp- I can't wear a bikini! I will look fat next
to your vampire gorgeousness!
Alice: 5,4,3,2...
Bella: -Cries
dramatically- FINE! Damn... I'm hott. With two t's. -growls sexily at
self in mirror-
Rosalie: -pops out of nowhere- MY MIRROR!
-Bella
and Alice walk downstairs in bikinis ready for some private-beach
goodness-
Edward: Bella! I can't keep my hands off of your
sexiness!
Bella: Oh Edward!
Edward: Oh Bella!
Emmett: Oh
Emmett!
-Rosalie whacks him with Jacob's severed leg-
Everybody:
YAY!