A/N: Alright, everybody, this is my first Get Backers story so go with me on this. I hope it meets up to standards and hope even more that you'll be kind enough to leave me a review, ne? Flames are always allowed, as long as they don't... ya'know, rip me apart. Flame like nice people and just gimmie constructive criticism... and... Mind the warnings, please.
I'm used to writing in first person POV, but this time I don't think it'll fit just quite right. So I'm gonna try something else, just don't get all flame happy on me if it screws everything up.
Also, sorry if things seem a LITTLE bit OOC. There's no uke in this fic, but if you're looking, chances are you will find it in Ban. Hahaha, just read, you'll like it anyway.
Disclaimer: Ban, Ginji, and all other related Get Backers characters do not belong to me. They belong to their rightful owners. How depressing.
The song in this fic is "If I Were You" by Candee Jay. May I suggest that when that part comes, you listen to the song? I always listen to the song featured in a fic if I have it because I REALLY makes it all the better. Try it!
Warnings: Uhm, YAOI. If you don't like, leave. Thank CHU!
Pairing: Ban x Ginji
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Get Backers
If I Were You
A fic by yours truly, Crimson Vixen
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His head was pounding, but he never told that to Ginji. That winning smile of his was just too perfect to slap off just because of a little throb in his temple. And those eager eyes were too innocent and… cute (there was no other way to put it) to refuse.
Ginji was excited, that much was for sure. His eyes closed from that big smile he beamed in Ban's direction, cheeks altering to a light shade of pink. His hands had found Ban's wrists without any problem or hesitation, sending a tingling sensation up the brunette's arm on contact with the electricity that constantly surged underneath his skin. It was just a little static shock, and he was used to the feeling by now; it happened all the time. Because Ginji was often in high spirits, even over the simplest of things, and would always touch Ban in his stimulation, rarely even aware that he was making arm hair stand straight. Of course, it was all even harder to decline when his blonde partner slide out the lower lip to beg, along with the occasional "C'mooon, Ban-chaaan! Pleeease?"
When Ginji started tugging at Ban's weight, his feet began to move right away. The idea of staying put was simply not an option anymore. Though, exactly… where Ginji was dragging him didn't even cross his mind until a few moments later, about the time that Ban had gotten tired of being wheeled around and was walking on his on next to his partner. His long fingers had reached into his pocket and fished around until the pack of smokes he was searching for was in his grasp. Tapping the small box with his free hand, a single white stick slide out and Ban took it between his lips without the slightest dithering. Next, he whipped out his lighter and flicked with skill, letting the flame light his smoke.
As the cloudy air raced out of his nostrils with a single exhale, he felt more relaxed, calmer.
And now he was here, in a bar he had never even known existed (not good for the famous Get Backers) until now, when Ginji had shoved him through those doors only moments ago. The place was crowded, as most bars are, and the air was thick and smelled of alcohol and smoke. The music that was playing seemed louder than it needed to be, kicking Ban in the skull, making his headache throb with the beat of the current song.
He scanned the area, trying to peer over the tops of people's heads, but couldn't find the spikes of yellow that he was looking for. When did that idiot run off, anyway? They'd just gotten there and already his partner had gotten himself lost. Ban took another drag out of his stick.
A nice. Long. Drag.
And then another.
When his chest started to stir and tighten, he flicked off the last of the ashes and put the thing out.
In truth, he appreciated what his best friend was trying to do for him. Yeah, they had just completed a retrieval for an elderly woman who just wanted her precious baby, (her… uh, kitty) from her good-for-nothing husband, a mission that could have define the word easy. Still, he didn't complain, and the mangy cat was no problem to get. Ginji had been cooing the damn thing ever since his got his hands on its fur, rubbing noses with it, scratching its ears and just being disgusting. The old hag had paid them as soon as the cat was back in her hands, and although the payment was a small one, it was still money that they didn't have, so Ban was thankful.
And Ginji just insisted that they celebrate their earnings by… spending it… in order to celebrate. Not the best logic by any means, but Ginji seemed really set on taking Ban out for a night out and off of retrieving. And it was nice, too; getting out, that is, and not really having a reason to look over your shoulder every five minutes. So, they wasted their yen on entrance to a nearby club.
With that thought, Ban rested his elbows on the bar top behind him, slumping into the ugly green stool that sit there, still keeping an eye out for his bumbling partner. It was hard to, though, with everybody dancing and throwing their hands and drinks into the air as the lights hit their bodies and the music exhilarated them. He even found himself tapping his foot.
…once or twice.
With boredom starting to overcome, it wasonly a matter of time before he started to glance around and make pointless observations. Like… how the bartender had been staring at him for the past ten minutes, wiping at the same clean glass with a blue rag, and how hot theplace was. He could feel small bit of sweat peppering the back of his neck and down his back. The lights were a variety of colors, but were all very bright once they flew over your head, and seemed to be moving faster and slower, whichever tempo the music was going. Almost everybody was up and dancing, and those who weren't were in their own little groups with drinks, laughing it up and having a good time. So where was Ginji?
"Can I get you something to drink?"
Startled, Ban whipped his head around, his spikes following his motions. Lifting his right hand, he used his middle finger to push his purple glasses up the bridge of his nose, repositioning himself on the stool to get cozy until Ginji arrived. He looked at the man behind the counter, the one who had thrown a question at him. Ban thought about it for a moment, looking up and to the left as he did so, only to close his eyes and shake his head.
"Nah, I'm good."
"You sure?"
Ban raised a brow. He was never expecting a bartender to question his answer like that. But he shrugged it off almost as soon as the issue had occurred, and heaved a sigh.
"I'm sure."
"Okay, then." He said, smile on his face. "Lemme know if you change your mind."
Waving a hand in the air, Ban attempted to signal that he wanted to be left alone, but was caught completely off-guard when the man set down the glass he had been feverishly scrubbing, and winked at him. Winked.
The Get Backer found himself holding his tongue between his teeth, watching as the man walked away to serve people that had gathered at the other end of the counter. Something felt a little off, and Ban narrowed his eyes, pondering possibilities. He returned his attention to the dancing crowd, brows slowly starting to lower and knit together as… the realization struck like a bolt from Ginji when he sneezed and accidentally shot out a volt in his general direction.
But before he made a definite conclusion, he double checked the dancers, the small crowds hovering in random areas, the workers, everyone… They were all guys. There wasn't a single girl in sight.
This….was a gay bar.
The lump in Ban's throat was hard to swallow, and when he did, it was loud enough to overpower the music that pounded at his ears. His headache doubled in that instant, enraged and uncomfortable at the same time. His eyes were wide as he rotated in his seat, making sure that no one was getting closer to him than need be. But regardless of his efforts, a hand landed on his shoulder, gripping him and spinning him around.
"Back off!" Ban swatted a hand at the intruder, the back of his hand coming into contact with the flesh of a soft cheek. Damn, howcould someone sneak up on him like? The small and surprised gasp that followed was familiar and Ban focused on his target.
"Ow… Geez," a gloved hand came up to rub the offended cheek. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."
Relief made itself known as Ginji took the seat next to Ban, smile on his face, as usual, completely oblivious. He fidgeted with his gloves, tugging on them to secure them, stroking the soft material at his palm. Ban looked at his partner's profile, the cherry tinge slowly disappearing from thecheek that his hand had violated. The Jagan-wielding man opened his mouth to scold, to yell, to… do something that he wasn't sure what just yet, but the former gang leader had beat him to it.
"Ban-chan…" His voice held the normal cheery tone that it always has, but Ban didn't miss the slight waver in his voice, one that sounded odd coming from him, and one that showed he was a tad bit… uncomfortable.
"What?"
"Nothing," he laughed a bit, lowering his head at the action before raising it again to have his eyes meet the ones of the man he admired most. "It's just that… people around here are really friendly, I've noticed."
Something dropped hard in Ban's stomach, though he couldn't tell if it was his heart or something else. Whatever it was, he didn't like it, and he had to swallow again to rid himself of a nasty taste that made itself know in his mouth. The images that ran through his mind, though more than likely to be impossible, were ones that he never wanted to see again, and he placed a firm hand on Ginji's back.
"Ginji, do you know where we are?"
"Of course I do!" Smile. "Ruby Collar."
Why he had never bothered to look at the name of the place they had strayed into, or why he hadn't noticed sooner that every occupant of the room was that of the male gender… was beyond him, and to be honest, it pissed him off to no end. But looking at Ginji's unknowing face made him repress the urge to yell. After all, he meant well, and he was only doing this to make Ban happy. Ginji was usually perceptive, but just because he saw certain things, didn't mean he always put two and two together. Besides, unlike Ban himself, he was better at reading people, rather than the situation at hand. So there was no reason to get mad at the smiling fool that was seated next to him. That would be pointless. It would accomplish nothing.
But damn did it feel good when his hand smacked against the back of Ginji's unacquainted head, anyway.
"Do you know what kind of a place the Ruby Collar is?"
Ginji was still rubbing the back of his head when the question was addressed to him, as if it was helping him to think. After a moment, he looked at Ban, eyes wide and naive. His stare captured Ban,thechildlikefeatures Ginji was unaware he had soaking into Ban's sight. Ban shook his head when the blonde gave his response.
"What… kind of place is it, Ban-chan?"
A sigh, a shudder, and another glance around them to make sure they were a safe distance from everybody else. Ban patted at his clothing, a sudden crave for nicotine shooting through his system. As soon at the stick was lit and a breath of smoke was released, he felt as though he could think better.
Who was he to explain to Ginji the concept of a gay bar? Ginji was smart, but didn't understand things such as ...eh, bondage, or why couple brought food into their bedrooms and then locked the door, or… well, things like this. Ban opened his mouth to start, but nothing could – would come out. Ginji's stare was still pinning him, and he took another drag from his smoke.
"Let's just get out of here."
"What? But we didn't even get to dance, yet!"
"You can dance later, nimrod, we need to get going."
"Just one dance, Ban-chan! Just one!" He held up a finger with a grin - just one - jetting off into the crowed before Ban could reach out and take a hold of his partners arm.
"Dammit! Ginji!"
The music was too loud and the lights were making him dizzy. Now… not only was he standing in the middle of a bar with males much larger than himself that were not really interested in the opposite sex, but Ginji, like an idiot, ran off into the heart of it all, because he couldn't resist the urge to tap his feet.
Still, Ban cupped his hands around his mouth, dropping his smoke when he inhaled a deep breath.
"Ginji! Get back here!"
The current song ended, but the next one started up too fast for Ban to shout Ginji's name during the silence between. The song started out with words right away, and already Ban's throbbing head was pounding to the pulse of the song.
If I were you
I would never let me go
If I were you
I would always love me so
If I were you
As if empowered by the song, he puffed out his chest and pushed his way through all the people that were dancing, doing what he could to move them aside in a way that said 'I want to pass' rather than 'I'm interested.' But the dance floor was overpopulated, and it was getting thicker as the song continued. But he managed to squeeze through, his arms sliding across a sporadic slick shirtless body, and his behind being tapped here and there, which was only making him push through harder and faster. His feet padded against the ground every time a beat sounded throughout the bar, something that Ban realized, most people did without realizing.
I can't play your part in life
But I would surely walk my way
I cannot think the way you think
But I would never go away
Further. Over there.
You can trust me when I say
That I will always be for real
You can always count on me
No matter how alone you feel
As the chorus started to sound, he felt choked by the fog and the smell of sweat and beer and B.O. But he kept going, wondering why the hell it was so damn difficult to find someone like Ginji in this crowd. He would never say it aloud, and was even having trouble saying it to himself now, but he was worried. Ginji… had an attractive face, as well as an attractive body, Ban had no denial in that, so it was only pure instinct that told him to find him and find him quick before someone else did.
Frustrated and tired, Ban stood still for a moment, and then jumped. He only had to do this twice before finding a certain green piece of clothing slung over one of the speakers. He started walking again, this time knowing which direction to go.
I can't tell you what to do
I can only hope for more
More decisions to be good
Like the way they were before
By now, Ban could see the familiar yellow locks through the wall of people. He was getting closer.
I can't dream the things you dream
'Cause I would not know where to start
Life is never what it seems
When two souls are far apart
Like coming up from underwater and gasping for breath, Ban burst through the crowd and onto the floor where he could be on all fours and not be in a tight spot. But looking at the ground by his hands, he noticed Ginji's shoes, and his pale legs. And… and they were bouncing. Ban lifted his head to find…
Ginji was dancing.
It figures, that's why the idiot ran out here in the first place.
I don't wanna know
How it feels to lose a friend
And if I were you
I would never leave again
Something… something was stirring in the pit of the brunette's tummy. Nothing vile or gross, but something more… enjoyable. Maybe it was because Ginji was having a good time. Or perhaps it was because he was not in any danger. But deep inside, Ban had a feeling those weren't the reasons.
He stood up, and could do nothing more but stare at the blonde that was dancing in front of him. The blond that did not even notice his presence; he had his eyes gently closed, and Ban could see a tiny bit of his white teeth through his slightly parted lips. His green vest had obviously been shed due to the heat, leaving Ginji only in his white T-shirt and his shorts and gloves, but he was still visibly sweating. In fact, his skin shimmered in the red and blue lights, practically soaked with perspiration.
Ban found himself licking his lips as he stared.
If I were you
I would never let me go
If I were you
I would always love me so
If I were you
The young blonde slightly squatted, placing his hand on his knees, and he started to bump and thrust and bounce to the beat, eyes still closed. Something tight caught in Ban's throat, but when he chucked it aside he found he did indeed have a voice.
If I were you
If I were you
"Ginji!"
The song ended.
Ginji's lashes twitched before his brown irises appeared from behind those lids, a huge breath releasing itself from his now dry mouth. His arm rose to wipe at his drenched forehead, but he only managed to coat it with another layer of hot and sticky sweat. Ginji grabbed for his vest and put it back on, scratched at his head, his fingers running through the doused golden locks, some of which were plastered to his head.
His gaze fixed itself onto Ban's and he grinned like a madman.
"Hey, Ban-chan! Did you get a chance to dance?"
"No!" He took a hold of Ginji's sleeve and pulled him over to a secluded corner by the bathroom door. "What do you think your doing?"
"I'm trying to have a good time," he answered honestly, with a shrug. Ban couldn't stop staring at his partner's lips, which were still open to allow easier breathing. "You're not having a good time?"
The disappointment was heavy in his voice, and there was no hiding the unnecessary worry that lingered there. But Ban shook his head; he couldn't seem to shake this weird feeling he was getting looking at his partner in the condition he was in. But alas, his eyes loitered on Ginji's neck, which like the rest of him, was glistening in the dark room. So before things got even weirder in the mind of Ban Midou, he decided to be blunt.
His hands cupped Ginji's startled face, and pulled him closer to whisper.
"This is a gay bar, Ginji."
Pulling away, he release his hold on Ginji's flushed cheeks, somehow not wanting to rub the moisture on his hand away. From the look on Ginji's face, he didn't seem all too shock to hear this, only a mild surprise, but he looked down the floor, thinking, regardless.
"Think of it this way, Ban-chan," Ginji lifted his head and tilted it to the side, smiling and placing his hand in Ban's. Ban's reaction was a small jump, and an awkward sensation that returned to his stomach for the umpteenth time that night, but he never pulled his hand away. In fact, it felt right that way.
"At least no one you know will see you."
Ban Midou arched both of his brows, confused and amused simultaneously, expecting to have some random outburst, but instead found himself smirking at the honest to god truth in that statement. But he shook his head violently right after that, and was a little shocked when he suddenly had an armful of Ginji. His purple shades slide down his nose, and a hand that was not his own pushed them back up for him. His chin was tickled by the brush of yellow just beneath it, and when he looked down, Ginji had himself pressed into his chest, fingers grasping at Ban's shirt, head tucked securely into his neck. It was amazing how he was able to make sure there was no space left in between them, and more amazing still at how comfortable it was, even with Ginji dripping in sweat.
"Ban, it's my fault we're here, but you have to dance at least one time before you leave."
His voice was soft, but loud enough to be heard over the fast paced tempo of the current noise, and Ban gave a questioning glare, even if Ginji was not looking at him.
"You don't want your money to go to waste, do you?"
Ginji reached behind his own sticky back and grabbed Ban's hands, although Ban was clueless as to how and when they had gotten there. Just like before, he was being pulled at, but this time, his feet stayed right where they were, the mind of the man with steel grip was confused beyond all holy hell. Not at what was happening, but at how he was feeling about it. He wanted to leave this place, and he wanted to do it now, but there was something about the way Ginji asked favors that made you want to toss your own ideas aside in some dark ally.
"Ban-chan…" both of his partner's hands were laced around his own, his body leaning towards him in mid-motion of pulling at his arm again, brown eyes growing wider (if that was even possible at this point) and more pleading. As if the lights wanted to help, they shone on his person, enhancing the light in his eyes, and making it… utterly useless to resist.
Ban's feet were moving, following that of Ginji's, who led them to the dance floor, in a place that was surprisingly semi-secluded. The song that was playing was a tempo that was not to fast, not too slow, and from the way Ginji flung himself to Ban's front side, it was a decent song for a slow dance. Ginji started to slowly sway, holding himself close to Ban, who had yet to shuffle a single toe.
"C'mon, Ban-chan…"
Just what was going on, anyway?
"Ginji, are you ok?" Ban was finally gaining some sense to at least talk, now. At least that was a good thing. "You're acting a little… strange today."
"Ban-chan, I…"
When something was bothering the lightning wielding young man, if there was anyone he shoveled it out to, it was Ban. And Ban would listen, even if this time, something told him it was different from all the other times.
The song that was playing from the nearby speakers was coming to an end, and Ban looked to the side to stare at them, and of all things, pictured Ginji there, dancing the dance he was before. He pictured those same moves, eyes closed and body bumping perfectly to the tune, body radiant under the searing lights and on the thumping floors.
Why was he thinking like this? His mind brought him back to the current, and he reminded himself that this was a friggen gay bar, and the reason he wanted to find Ginji in this place so bad was so they could get out of there. But seeing him dance like that did something.
Ban could feel a cramp in his neck so he turned his attention back to Ginji, who was a mere inch away from his face, looking at him with sad and almost… longing eyes.
"Ginji…?"
Ban was no scientist, but he was damn smart, and he knew that boys like to kiss girls and girls like to mess with boys' heads. But he was also smart enough to know that Ginji's soft lips were pressed against his own, and the wetness on his own lips was from said kisser, he, Ban Midou, was the kissee, and that Ginji had intentionally made this so. And it was wrong, so very, verywrong, because this isn't the way things are supposed to be.
So… Why was he kissing him back? And why did his hands wrap around Ginji's body so protectively? Why did it feel so good? So right? Why did... getting out of there not seem so important anymore?
Ginji pulled away, and once again, locked his eyes onto Ban's. But this time, they were glittering not from light, but from liquid. Ban raised a hand to stroke Ginji's cheek with a smooth thumb, before touching his own face, still a little unsure if this was really happening.
"B-Ban-chan…!" Ginji gritted his teeth, looking away. Ban decided at that time that shame did not fit Ginji's features very well. "I'm… so, SO sorry! I didn't—"
"Ginji," he said it before he thought it, and Ginji lifted his head, though he found it harder than it needed to be.
"Ban-chan…?"
This time, Ban was the one to lean forward and capture Ginji in surprise, his lips imprisoning Ginji's, demanding entrance and gaining it after a little while, mind still shouting at him that this was all wrong.
But that was okay, because sometimes, it's okay to be wrong.