Disclaimer: I do NOT own any Harry Potter characters and sorry if this story is close to any other stories, it does somewhat hard to avoid a bit of others stories mixed in while writing and I know this isn't the most original but oh well.
Memories consume
Like opening the wound
I'm picking me apart again
You all assume
I'm safe here in my room
Unless I try to start again
I, Draco Malfoy, hate myself. Why might you ask? Simple really. I'm fake, there's nothing real about me. I mask my feelings from the world; they are a weakness I don't need.
I don't want to be the one
The battles always choose
'Cause inside I realize
That I'm the one confused
I'm the good little pureblood, always doing as Fathersays, never once doing what I want. I pretend that I'm someone I'm not.
I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don't know why I instigate
And say what I don't mean
I don't know how I got this way
I know it's not alright
So I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
Tonight
Once I asked Father, why if Mudbloods were so stupid, why was Hermione Granger the best in every class? That's the first time I felt Crucio... by my own Father. He told me never question the Dark Lord again.
Clutching my cure
I tightly lock the door
I try to catch my breath again
I hurt much more
Than anytime before
I had no options left again
I hated the Golden Trio. They were happy, not hiding behind masks. Not afraid to show the world the 'real you'. They should be sad, angry at the world, hurting...but no matter what I did to them, they just shrugged it off and in the end, I felt worse.
I don't want to be the one
The battles always choose
'Cause inside I realize
That I'm the one confused
I watched her, Hermione, the Mudblood. She had a loving family, friends, money, best of both the wizarding and muggle world, while I, a Malfoy, who is supposed to have everything had cold and distant family, no real friends, sure I had money but that's all it is. Why did she, a filthy mudblood, have a better life than I, a Malfoy did. Malfoys' were supposed to have the best.
I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don't know why I instigate
And say what I don't mean
I don't know how I got this way
I'll never be alright
So, I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
Tonight
I think about the war coming up. I don't want to be in it. The things I saw my Father do. Raping and beating women. Killing children just because their blood. It's one thing, Father, to hate muggles and mudbloods it's another to take their life.
I'll paint it on the walls
'Cause I'm the one at fault
I'll never fight again
And this is how it ends
My nights are plagued with the screams of women being raped, children being beaten, and men being tortured...all for their blood. Pathetic really. I decided right then what I was going to do.
I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
But now I have some clarity
to show you what I mean
I don't know how I got this way
I'll never be alright
So, I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
Tonight
I've come to a decision. I look up at Dumbledore. "I want to offer my services as a Spy."
Please review that way I know at least one person has read this, and let me know if it absolutely sucks. Jaded-Chaela