Disclaimer- I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters I just like to play with them.
HPOV
As she sat behind the bushes flanking the heavy oak front doors. She could have sworn she was being watched. No matter how much she tried she just couldn't shake the feeling, not that it mattered anyway. It wasn't exactly like she cared any more, as long as it wasn't one of her friends.
She sat there hidden in the shadows for longer than she had planned. It was so cold out here at this time of the morning that she could see her breath like smoke. Thinking of smoke, she pulled a small packet from inside her jacket and lit herself a cigarette. she knew it was a bad habit but she had worse. As she pulled in a large draw on her cigarette she couldn't help the thoughts that were running rampant through her mind. she felt a tear brake free and trail down her cheek. She had really had enough today, ok so she had been working herself to hard, she knew that, but then the letter had been delivered and she had known instantly that she would need more than just the night air and her cigarettes tonight.
she reached inside her jacket once more and then removed it baring her arms to the freezing night air. She brought the blade to her arms again and again until she couldn't decide if it was the blood the tears or both that was blurring her vision.
SPOV
He had been watching her since she left her common room and he could believe what he had seen. Now he had to decide what to do. It didn't take long. He walked over and carefully wrapped her in her jacket picking up both her and the paper that had fallen out and headed to the dungeons. He knew she would not take kindly to waking up under Poppy's care at the moment. Instead he laid her on his sofa, bandaged her wounds and covered her with a blanket. Now it was time to turn his attention to the paper, it had looked like a letter of some kind and while she would not thank him for reading it, he was hoping it would shed some light on what he had just seen. Maybe it would even give him a chance to help her. he picked it up and began to read.
Hermione,
I am writing to inform you that you will return home upon your next holiday. If you do not comply the punishment will be severe. We are unhappy that you did not complete your previous punishments, prior to returning to that school. Do not think that informing your little friends or anyone else for that matter will help you. Your Mother has already taken her punishment for allowing you to leave early and will not be able to help you should you defy me again.
I expect a reply promptly.
Father.
He just couldn't believe what he had just read. He had been given the impression that her parents loved and supported her no matter what. This however seemed to blow that out of the water. What was he going to do now?. He couldn't very well confront her given what he had just read. No he needed to be more subtle and see if she would tell him herself. He settled into his armchair and waited for her to wake up.
HPOV
As she slowly woke, she could feel the warmth of the blanket covering her. A scent surrounded her that she couldn't quite place, a mix of sandalwood and spices. It wasn't an unpleasant smell, it was in fact quite comforting. She moved a little trying to gage if the smell was coming from the blanket or the rest of the room. As she moved she felt the pull of the cuts she had made earlier. When she looked at her wrist instead of seeing the mess she expected, she saw neat white bandages. This was strange, she knew she wasn't in the hospital wing so who had wrapped her arms so carefully and where the hell was she?. Oh Merlin, how she wanted a cigarette, but she had just realised that she had no idea where her jacket had gone. Then it hit her. The cigarettes were the least of her worries. The letter was in her jacket and that was the last thing she wanted someone to find. It would bring up way to many questions that she was far from ready to answer. Her eyes saw the movement before her brain could catch up and she flinched out of pure instinct, before she realised who was in the room with her. "Pro...Professor Snape?." She was sure she was in for it now. He was the last person she would have expected or wanted to see right now. "Miss Granger, do you know where you are?." That seemed a little to mild for him, but she could see that he was waiting for her to answer. "No Sir, I haven't a clue to be truthful. all I know is that
I'm not in the Hospital wing." She was sure she saw a slight smile from him but it was gone to quickly for her to be sure. "Well Miss Granger, you happen to be in my personal quarters, I did not believe taking to you to Madam Pomfrey would be of benefit to you in your current state. I am more than equipped to deal with your injuries here." She was in shock. Not only was she in Snape's private rooms, but he had also dressed her wounds and left her to rest. Plus the biggest shock of all. He was being almost nice to her. "I don't understand Sir" she said, her voice shaky. "I brought you here to try and help you Miss Granger. As much as I may seem to be a cold heartless bastard, I do in fact care a great deal what happens to the students at this school. Even more so those of you that have returned following the war." She didn't know what to say. It was the most he had ever said to her in all of her previous six years of being taught by him. She knew that Harry had spoken with him a few times since the war had ended but they had never discussed what had been said. She knew that was down to Harry's respect for Snape's privacy.
"I have never believed that you did not care Sir. The number of times you saved our lives. The help you gave us even though it risked your own safety. The things I can only imagine you had to endure to help win the war. I have nothing but respect for you and everything you have done. I must admit I can't quite understand why you would allow me in your private rooms and why you would be nice to me. The person you yourself named an insufferable know it all." Again she was sure she saw a small smile, but it was gone as quickly as it appeared. "Miss Granger, as much as you may think I do not approve of you. The truth is in fact quite the opposite. Unfortunately I have never been able to show you any favour. For a long time I had eyes and ears following me almost constantly and had I tried to encourage you, it would have been very dangerous for me, and even more so for you."
If she thought she was in shock before, it was nothing compared to how she was feeling now. He had as good as told her that he liked her. But what would he think if he found out the truth. He said he wanted to help her. Unfortunately she could not see how he would be able to do that without knowing more about her. "I thank you for your honesty Professor and for your kindness, but I really should return to my rooms before I am missed." "Miss Granger. First of all it is four am on a Saturday morning, you will not be missed for quite some time. Secondly I believe we need to talk regarding the reason I needed to bring you here in the first place. As much as I understand that it may be uncomfortable for you, it needs to be addressed before it gets any worse."
As he finished he handed her the cigarettes she had believed lost and she gratefully lit herself one. She almost choked however when followed her lead and lit one for himself. "So Miss Granger, would you care to explain yourself?." She didn't know what to say to him without giving away to much information. She took a deep breath and began. "Sir, what I need you to understand is, that this is not really a recent thing, it doesn't always take a lot to trigger me any more. Especially since the war and everything else." She held her gasp as she realised what she had said and could only hope that he hadn't picked up on it.
"So Miss Granger, would you care to tell me what caused you to begin this self destructive behaviour?." Well that was easy enough to answer without giving to much away. "It began when I was around ten years old. I don't however see it as self destructive. It helps to calm me down enough to deal with things." he sighed "And what pray tell does it help you to deal with?."
Shit now she was in for it. Trust him to go straight for that one. "well in for a penny" she thought to herself. "Well when I was around eight I found out I was adopted. I didn't really take it very well. It caused all sorts of problems and upset my adoptive parents greatly. I wanted to find my birth parents and find out why they didn't want me." she took a deep breath and continued "I came to understand in time that given the war, my parents likely gave me up to protect me. It still hurt that I didn't get the chance to know them, or if they had any more children after me. Did I know them if they did?.
I know that I hurt my adoptive parents but it really couldn't be helped. I needed to know who I really was." She couldn't decipher the look on his face "Miss Granger, I understand it must have been difficult for you, finding out your parents were not who you believed. You obviously made some progress however in discovering that at least one of your birth parents were magical. It is not a great step from there to finding their names now that you are of age." At her shocked look he continued "Yes Miss Granger, I know of your third year bout with the time turner. If my math is correct, that places your age at nineteen rather than seventeen. Have you not thought to look into the matter of your parents since returning to school?." Now she was stuck. She knew exactly who her birth parents were but she dare not tell a soul, for fear they would not understand. "I brewed the potion before Harry, Ron and I left to hunt for horcruxes. So I am already aware of who my birth parents are. I am however the only one who knows the truth for the moment. I believe it is better that way rather than hurt people with the truth." She thought she caught a glimpse of shock cross his face before he spoke "You know who your birth parents are?. I had thought that your looks had been changed to match that of your adoptive parents. Given however that your looks have not changed, your birth parents must have chosen to give you to people who shared a likeness with themselves." She knew in fact that her looks hadn't changed because she had cast a glamour on herself to keep people from finding out.
She felt a strange tingle in her mind. She realised what he was doing. He was trying to use legimency on her. she slammed her shields into place and just prayed he hadn't seen to much. "Tell me Miss Granger, why were you thinking of Lily Potter?." She was angry now. "You tell me Professor, what makes you think you have the right to snoop inside my mind?." "Miss Granger. for your own safety, I suggest you calm down. I was not as you say snooping. I was merely trying to gage what state of mind you were in, given the current subject of conversation. I can see I was wrong to do so without informing you of my intentions. I must say however that your shields are very impressive. I did not realise you had any experience with Occlumency." She smiled slightly. "Whilst you were teaching Harry, I began to study the information the library held on the subject. My intention was to be able to help Harry if possible. Instead I found myself engrossed for my own reasons, and taught myself as much as I could. After I had exhausted all the material I could find, I went to the Headmaster and asked for help in learning more. Of course he looked into my mind and saw everything, but he did at least teach me to hide what he had seen. He called me a natural, but I'm not sure I agree with him. Sure the Occlumency seemed to come easy enough. In the end I only needed a fraction of my shields to keep people out of my mind. It was the Legimency that was so much more difficult. The Occlumency took me what seemed like the longest six months of my life. The year I spent training in becoming a Legimens with Professor Dumbledore seemed like hell. Some of the things I saw in his mind. I came close to giving up some days. But I couldn't stop. I wouldn't let myself." This time she saw true shock on his face before he spoke. "You mastered Occlumency in six months! And Legimency in a year!?." She nodded "I know you are probably wondering what took me so long. I'm sure it took you much less time than that." "Miss Granger, Albus was correct to call you a natural. It took me years to master those skills and I have long been classed as a natural. For you to have mastered both in such a short time, is unheard of. You would either have to have an extraordinary level of power from your magical core and/or a natural as one or both of your birth parents." She didn't know what to say to that without giving him way to much information. "Of course." he continued "If you know who they are, it would be fairly simple to discover such traits. It would require a few changes to the standard potion. I could have it ready in as few as three days." She knew that one of her parents was a natural, but she could not be sure of the other.
She found herself rather curious as to the outcome. now however was the time to be careful. "I would be very interested to learn if it was an inherited trait. I would however wish to view the results alone. I would be more than happy to share if one or both were or are naturals, just not who they are." He smiled slightly "I believe that would be more than acceptable. I will begin in the morning, it will be ready for you by Tuesday evening. I will send for you once it is ready. You may take it here if you wish to avoid prying eyes and I will return once you are done." It was her turn to smile now. "Thank you Professor, I really do appreciate this. I should be going though. Saturday or not I should try and get some sleep before the others wake me up to join them for breakfast." He nodded "Goodnight, Miss Granger." "Goodnight Professor, and thank you for your kindness." She smiled to herself as she walked back to her rooms. Maybe she had been wrong. Maybe things could be ok in the end. Maybe she could know at least one of her birth parents. She just hoped everyone would not take it as badly as she expected, when the truth finally came out. She knew that Ginny would stand by her no matter what, but as for Harry and Ron she couldn't be as sure. She would have to talk to Headmistress McGonagall before she told her friends, just encase they reacted badly to the news. Fortunately that day was a little way off. She wanted to see the results of the potion first.