I will never forget the child named Neville Longbottom, and how much stronger he was than me. The first and only time I ever took him seriously was when he was put in front of my forced master the Dark Lord. After all it was so much like the time I joined the ranks of the Deatheaters…

The first time I was in the presence of the Dark Lord I was shaking so hard that the room seemed to vibrate and it looked as it would if I had James glasses on. I would have soiled myself had I not the second his Deatheaters grabbed me.

"Rise vermin, tell me what you know of the Potters," Voldimort hissed to me. Nothing scared me more at that moment than the hissing voice of the Dark lord-for it was unnatural and so unlike my friends. My fear drove me to rise; just like it drove me to do a lot of things that evening.

"I-I-I…will I be killed after I leak any information?" I asked the vile creature, and I wanted to kill myself the moment those words came out of my mouth.

"You will. Unless you join and become a continuous source of knowledge you will have no further use," the Dark Lord said with disturbing casualty.

"NO!" I shouted and I should have let them fire upon me, but my cowardliness refused to allow me to die with the little nobility I had left. "Wait! I am apart of the Order of the Phoenix! I can leak you information from there."

I could feel my heart and conscience dying at that moment, and I could feel some twisted sense of comfort coming over me. Apart of my brain told me "To shake it off and take it like a man", that voice sounded so much like James, and the other part said "You're safe-don't screw it up!"

If there is one thing I hate in this world it is how powerful the second voice was at the time. There is no greater influence to me than my own great towering fear.

"Very well, but if I want a good spy I must make it look like you said no," Voldimort smiled at me, and I knew I would live-by a thread.

It was one of the times the Dark Lord graced Hogwarts with his presence during his grand reign. He had chosen me as his a member of his entourage, and I felt elated at this honor. He had said there was a very specific reason that he chose me, but never told me why. I did not dare question such a glorious and grand honor as being seen with the Dark Lord.

He led us into the headmaster's office and Snape welcomed the Dark Lord with a bow and the rest of us with a curt nod of his head. It was then that I saw him…

The poor boy was shaking worse than I had when I met the Dark Lord face to face, and it wasn't even the first time for him. He was rounder than the other kids his age like I was. He was almost a squib like I was. And last but not least he was just as easy to scare as I was. This boy would have been my apprentice if he had joined.

I remember myself thinking "Potters always make the same mistakes". He would crack just as I did and just as hard. It has always been said that history repeats itself and until then I had never believed it.

"Rise vermin, and tell me what you know of the Potter boy," My master hissed in the same way. He noticed how alike the boy and were, and I think everyone here was smirking at me.

"N-n-no," the boy stuttered. As I found out later this was not the only difference. He looked completely terrified and he was unafraid to show it. "H-harry has always been kind to me, h-he helped me more than anyone else. I-I wont betray him."

Somehow I knew that last sentence was aimed at me, and it hit dead on. I took a second to look at the boy and out of the corner of his watering eyes he was looking at me. Just as the Dark Lord took his mark the boy ran away. The boys was braver than Harry Potter- after all- bravery is showing your spine and facing danger in the face of great fear.

It was at that moment I realized that by turning the Dark Lord down he proved he couldn't have been my apprentice, and this history won't repeat. Neville Longbottom was who I wished to be and who I should have been in the end. He was made of stronger stuff.

Alright people, lets get down to the first order of business. My desperate need for a beta. Here is the example of pathetic-ness that I produce without anyone to correct my mistakes or to give me advice that will make me grows stronger as a writer. As I pretty much said one sentence ago I need someone that will help me grow from your average fanfiction writer to someone that could be published.

Now about the fanfic. This is from Wormtail's perspective as if he had already lived through and he's sitting in a jail cell. He regrets his decision but he has conformed to his masters views. Please review and if you wish to beta me I ask that you send in the form of a PM.

I do not own Harry Potter.