Hi everyone! Yes I realise I should be studying but I can't keep my head from writing (especially since the next chapter of my wip fic has practically written itself and will be up soon). This story...well it was actually written over a year ago. It's quite a small fic and it is finished. It does deal with a rather strong subject which I completely understand some people would not enjoy and therefore I am leaving plenty of warnings. I also know there are probably quite a few things that are incorrect in how they would normally work in real life but I have taken literary liberties. Other than that, I hope it's well written and...may just maybe some of you may like it...I'm sorry ahead of time!

***WARNING: If issues of miscarriage, blood and the trauma of that are triggering PLEASE DO NOT READ***

"Morning beautiful," Harm spoke over the vehicle's bluetooth as he drove through the streets of Washington.

"Hmm morning," Mac's voice on the other hand was nothing but a hoarse whisper laced with the remnants of sleep.

"Did I wake you?" his voice amused

Twisting in bed under the sheets she turned onto her right holding the phone to her left ear; "Yeah…" her voice hinting at the smile that was slowly rearing along her lips.

Harm smirked at the thought of his wife lying in bed wearing nothing more than her underwear…if at all!

"Wish I was there…" he whispered.

"Wish you were here," she smiled now much more alert.

It had been a long 10 days away from his wife and he still had 3 or 4 days to go depending on how today panned out. As captain he would not ordinarily be called back to the States to aid in a case over 10 years old. However the people in question were names in high places. Therefore the navy held nothing back and called upon those involved on the original case, which unfortunately included him.

"I miss you," she whispered.

As a couple they were perfectly capable of functioning independently…but after all their years and the long and difficult history behind them…well being apart just didn't feel right anymore. They had tried to sort her work schedule around his trip. She had so desperately wanted to travel with him and see all their friends back in the U.S, but unfortunately it simply wouldn't work. Therefore he was under a married oath that he would return to her as soon as possible.

"I miss you too darling. I'm really trying to wrap this up as quickly as possible. I promise."

"I know. You do what you have to do," she smiled knowing her amazing husband was simply out there saving the world one court case at a time.

"Ah!" she whispered and cringed as she turned on her back and placed her free hand over her lower abdomen.

"You ok?" he asked quickly having heard her soft pained moan.

With eyes tightly shut and breathing heavily through the pain she replied; "Yeah," taking a deep breath; "Yeah…I think I'm getting my period that's all. Just cramps"

She was all too used to this…not something one should ever become accustomed to. And yet here she was living with this debilitating pain month after month.

Her initial surgery had momentarily put a damper on the pain, but soon enough her period "cramps" returned, only stronger.

And she hated it! Absolutely hated her body for betraying her in such a horrible way. For putting her through this agony month in month out. And all for what? For nothing! There was no gain in this pain. No recompense in the end and nothing to show for it. The one gift every woman should have, had been ripped away from her. Now her monthly periods were simply a bitter reminder of what she couldn't have.

"Wish I was there. Give you a backrub," his voice worried and sincere.

Harm had witnessed first hand as his wife suffered month after month. He had stood by feeling utterly useless and worst of all frustrated. He knew his wife all too well. He knew how strong she was both physically and mentally. Which made watching her writhe in agonizing pain all the more horrific. He had watched her in anguish as she threw up – the pain becoming too much for her body to withstand.

He hated it! He hated destiny or fate or life or whatever it was that had given her such a burden to carry. It was not fair! She of all people deserved so much better than this!

"Are you gonna be ok?" he asked seriously.

"I'll be fine. Don't worry."

"Are you sure?" he reiterated

"Yes. I'll be f…" she bit down on her lip and held her breath as another strong "cramp" gripped her. Turning to her side now she really needed to go to the bathroom. "Sweetheart. I have to go to the bathroom. I'll call you back later."

"Sure. Sure. And please, please call me if you need anything," he said firmly.

"Yes. I'll be fine," as she raised herself to a sitting position. "I love you," she whispered.

"I love you too."

Leaving the phone on the bed she quickly made her way to the en suite fearing she was already making a mess. Once there however, she found she was only experiencing the pain but her period had not yet started. So heading over to the sink she reached down into one of the bottom drawers for a tampon. It was on her way up that she screamed and folded over gripping the sink as she felt a gut-wrenching pain tearing up her abdomen and leaving her breathless.

This wasn't a cramp.

This pain was unlike anything she'd ever felt before.

She tried to control her breathing. She tried to straighten back up but this pain was only intensifying until she felt yet another sharp shooting pain that soon enough had her down on her knees, her hands tight fists against the floor and her eyes tightly shut. Tears quickly formed and fell as she felt yet another searing pain dragging another scream out of her. She was trembling. Cold beads of sweat forming on her skin.

On hands and knees she began to plead. To anyone who would listen…she pleaded. Please stop! Please! Her body swaying between sobs.

Between heavy labored breaths, teeth clamped together and shaking hands she slowly, slowly brought herself up to a sitting position where she finally saw it.

So much of it.

Everything. Her underwear. Her thighs. The bathroom mat once white…was now soaked in scarlet red.

And she was terrified.

"Wha…" she whispered still gripping her abdomen as she put one trembling and bloodied hand on the ground to support herself and used the last breath of strength left in her to almost tear off her underwear. Watching in horror, her hand reached between her legs. Her vision blurred and her heart beating painfully in her ears.

"No…" she whispered.

Finally crumbling to floor onto her right side, her legs folded up against her stomach and her face hidden behind her forearms…she cried. Breaking as she felt her body instinctively begin to push.

And she knew. She just knew.

"No…" she pleaded. "No. No…" she whispered between hot and heavy tears. "No," over and over again. "Please…" her voice shuddering. "Pleas…" a low whisper that only the heavens could have heard.