Loveless

by Mayushii

All copyright materials are property of their respective owners.

A/N: Kurama has lost something important. Hiei makes a promise to get it back. A story inspired by Kingdom Hearts of all things. Hope you enjoy.

"Loveless"

I lean over the kitchen table, rearranging some white roses in a vase. The afternoon sun shines through the window, reflecting off the facets of the crystal. I wonder if it's pretty. The hollowness in my chest where I might have felt pleasure tells me that I would have thought so two months ago; now, I can only guess.

"Shuichi?"

I blink and turn toward my mother, who has her head poked around the sliding door to the patio.

"Yes?" I ask, holding back a sigh.

"I was wondering if you could get an extra plate? We have another guest."

"Oh, really?" I ask disinterestedly. "I only invited five."

"I know, but your other friend came looking for you—you know, the one from Europe. I know you don't get to see him very often, so I asked him to stay and eat with us."

"Ah." I give her a languid nod. "I'll get him a plate."

Shiori smiles—not the happy smile she used to give, but a gentle, supportive smile. Then she pulls the door closed and goes to entertain my friends. It's really her party, anyway. She invited them all without asking me, no doubt hoping the surprise would cheer me up.

I watch her leave before returning to my vase. The last rose just won't fit. I frown. I don't want to cram the rose into the vase and risk breaking all the other stems. Shrugging, I snap the stem from the odd rose out and tuck the flower over my ear. Yusuke and Kuwabara will probably laugh and call me girly, but…well, it doesn't matter. I don't care for them much, anyway.

I go to the cabinet, get a plate from the shelf, and open the door to the patio. My mother is busy turning the burgers over while Yusuke wrestles with one of the white plastic chairs. Hiei stands apart from the group, watching Yusuke struggle for a moment before calmly turning to look at me.

"Hiei," I say with practiced politeness. "It's been a while."

"It has," Hiei answers with a little nod. "How have you been?"

"Fine, thank you. And yourself?"

"Fine."

I give him a short nod and turn my eyes away from him. I'm distantly surprised to find my guests staring at me.

"What's with the prissy greetings, guys?" Yusuke asks. Hiei glares at him.

"I only came here to check on…Shuichi." Hiei uses my human name with a bit of uncertainty, probably barely remembering what it is. When no one calls him out, Hiei turns to me. "If I could talk to you in private, this shouldn't take long."

"You aren't staying for lunch?" Shiori says sadly. Hiei pauses, considering her.

"Maybe," he answers, his tone not unkind. "But I have something important I should be doing right now. Besides, I'd rather not intrude on the party if Shuichi doesn't want me here."

"Oh, but he would love—"

"Mother," I say with a voice clearer than any I've used in the past eight weeks. "It would be best not to push the issue. If he doesn't want to stay, that's his choice." My mother closes her mouth, looking surprised and a little hurt, and I turn to Hiei, motioning toward the open door. "Please, come inside."

Hiei does as he's told. As he walks past me, I notice how tired he looks. His pants and sleeveless shirt have faded to off-black, his dark hair is even more tangled than usual, and his cheeks look less full than they did when I last saw him. There's a feeling in my chest like wind blowing through a large, empty room.

I close the door behind me and point Hiei toward the living room. He takes a seat in my stepfather's armchair, and I walk around the coffee table to sit on the couch opposite him. By the time I've settled down, Hiei is staring at me intently. I stare back at him, unmoved.

"You wear white now?" Hiei asks. He reaches up to touch the rose tucked over my ear. "I liked the red better."

"With all due respect, red roses are meant for lovers. Something I can no longer be." I frown at him, turning my face away from his warm, sword-roughened hand. "Do you mind?"

Hiei pulls away, looking troubled. He put his hands on his knees and leans forward, his shoulders rounded as if he wants to embrace me but is holding himself back.

"I think I can sense some of your energy coming back," he comments. "How do you feel?"

"I am physically healthy," I say. "But you are mistaken about my energy. It won't come back, and you know it. You may as well give up."

"Never," Hiei growls. "I'll track him down. He won't get away with this."

"He has gotten away with it. You'll never find him, and even if you do, what good will it do?" Hiei's eyes flash defiantly, and I sigh. "Can't you just accept that it's a lost cause?"

"Did you accept it when I said that I could never love you?" he asks firmly. I blink at him slowly as he leaves his chair and moves around the coffee table. He holds out a hand, which I take after a moment's hesitation. "I promise I will kill that bastard and win back your heart."

"It won't work," I warn him as he pulls me to my feet.

"You underestimate me, Kurama." He smirks slightly. "Though I wouldn't mind taking some good luck with me just in case."

Hiei puts one hand on my shoulder and pulls me down, standing on tiptoe to kiss me. Resigned, I lean down and open my mouth so that his tongue can slip inside. With a shiver of pleasure, Hiei releases his grip on my shoulder so he can run his hand through my hair instead. He pushes and rubs up against my body, not seeming bothered by my lack of response. When he finally breaks the kiss, I stare at him impassively and he gives me a wry smile.

"At least you let me kiss you this time," he says. "We're making some progress."

He gives my hand a little squeeze and pulls away. My chest feels almost painfully empty as he turns to leave.

"You…should stay for lunch, at least," I say. Hiei shakes his head.

"No, I don't think so. The sooner I leave, the sooner I can bring back your heart," he replies. He glances over his shoulder. "Don't worry. I will return soon. I give you my word."

I bite my lip as I watch him leave. I feel empty inside, so hopelessly, desperately empty. But I guess that's a good thing. I only feel empty because I know I should be filled with love. I press a hand over my chest, remembering how my heart used to flutter when he kissed me and held me. Can he really bring those feelings back?

Come back soon. I'll be waiting for you.

Well, that's it. I hope you liked it. Please review and tell me what you think!

1- In Yu Yu Hakusho, spirit energy is closely tied to emotions (demonstrated many times over). Kurama has lost his emotions, which means he doesn't have any spirit energy either.

2- Red roses are symbolic of lovers. White roses can mean chaste love or, in a less positive light, sterility.