Kiyomi: Anything in italics is in the past.
DISCLAIMER: Fairy Tail Belongs To Hiro Mashima
It's silent on the room. Nobody spoke even though there were many people present. The only sound heard is the sobs. Some louder than others as some people like to keep their tears to themselves. There's only one person that in that room that didn't cry. Lucy Heartfilla. She hasn't shed a tear since she got here. You'd think she'd be crying the most after it is her boyfriend's funeral. Yes, today is in fact Natsu Dragneel's funeral. Killed in a car accident and died the moment he was hit. There was no chance if him surviving. So why isn't she crying?
~Lucy's POV~
This is my fault. Why? Why did this happen to him. He didn't do anything wrong. He didn't do anything to deserve this. It's all my fault. It's because I yelled at him. It's because I said I hated him. It's all my fault. It's my fault he's dead.
He's late. He hasn't been home on time for a while. I don't know what to do. I talked to my friends about it and they keep suggesting he's cheating on me. I trust him, so I immediately brush away that option. It can't be true. It's so boring to just sit here and wait. After a little more time has pasted I decide to go take a walk. I open the door and my eyes widen. What's she doing here? Oh no, they saw me! I was about to turn and walk back into the house when something caught my eye. A ring. Was he going to propose. Does this mean he's really cheating on me? With Erza? No, he said they're only friends. Then why? "Lucy, what are you doing outside?" He sound completely natural. Trying to play innocent? How dare he! I turn around and stomp inside slamming the door closed behind me. I hear the sound of a car starting and it slowly fades away. The door creaks open and Natsu walks in. Damn I forgot about the extra key. "Hey Luce, what was that about?" "What are you doing in my house!" "Luce?" Oh no. Don't you dare "Luce" me. "What are you still do here?! Get out! You can just go and suck Erza's face! You're getting married to her anyways ! So leave!" "What? Lucy what are you talking about?" "You know what I'm talking about! You just fucking purposed to her!" I can feel the tears threatening to fall. "Lucy, I don't know what you're talking about!" Stop it. Stop lying to me. I can now freely feel the tears falling one by one down my face. "Hey, hey Lucy. Don't cry, please don't. I hate it when you cry. Lucy." Lies. They're all lies. Don't believe them Lucy. "Just go away! I never what to see your face again! I hate you!"
It turn out that I'm the one that lied. Everything he said was the truth. And I only found out after Erza told me. Why was I so stupid? That ring I saw. Erza was helping him propose to me and she wanted to see it. He was going to propose to me. We could've been happy. We could've had a life together. We could've both lived. It's all my fault that can't.
His eyes widen and looked like he was about to break. His once cheerful and bright eyes became dull. He looked like he wanted to collapse. "I see. I'll just leave then." He turned to walked towards the door and I had to resist the urge to run to him and apologize. I stand frozen for a bit then I walk to the door and close it. The loud roar of his car engine resounds in my ears but quickly disappears as he backs out of the drive way. I slide down the door and sits on the floor. What did I do? I want to cry and scream. But why? Why even though he deserved it? Why do I regret saying that I hate him?
I didn't understand at the time. Why I had that feeling and now It's too late. The feeling of regret was because I made a big mistake.
A couple day later I get a call from Igneel, Natsu's dad. I don't answer at first, but he keeps calling. Natsu gets his laziness from Igneel so if he's calling me so much, maybe it's really important so I decide to pick up next time. Ring ring. I pick up the phone and say hello. "Hi Lucy." What the? Is he crying? No that's almost impossible. "Igneel, are you crying?" "Lucy." "Yes?" "Natsu. He. He died." I drop my phone in shock and scramble to pick back up. "What! What do mean he died?!" "He was in a car accident the day you two had your fight. He died on impact." No. No! This all my fault. I quickly hung up and runs to my room. I start sobbing and crying into my bed sheets. The tears wouldn't stop and I ended up crying myself to sleep. ~Later~ I feel my body being moved so I open my eyes. Levy, Erza, Lisanna, and Mira are standing over me, judging by their appearances they were clearly crying as well. "Lucy are you ok?" I'm just fantastic. "Yeah I'm fine." "Lucy." Erza. Is this her fault too? "Why did you guys get into fight?" "He proposed to you when he was dating me. Did you expect us to talk it through." "Propos-? Wait you thought... I see." What? "Lucy. That ring was for you. He asked me to help him propose to you. I just wanted to see the ring." "But, why was he coming home late?" "Work. We took breaks from work to set everything up so we needed to make up for it." So it's not her fault then. Just mine. It's all my fault. "Can you guys leave me alone for a bit." "Ok. If you need us just call ok?" Thanks Mira. "Take care of yourself Lucy." Thanks to you too Lisanna. "I left ice-cream in the freezer." Thanks Levy. And thanks for explaining everything to me, Erza. Sorry for blaming you. "Lucy. I thought you'd what this." A ring? It's the ring Natsu was going to give me. "Thank you." I spent the rest of the days before the funeral crying and I wasn't sure if I could handle going. I know I'll want to break down and cry my heart out. 'Lucy. Don't cry, please don't. I hate it when you cry. Lucy.' What the? Natsu?! I see. You hate it when I cry right? Then I must have been hurting you. I don't want to hurt you. So I won't cry anymore.
I don't know if I'll be able to keep that promise. I want to cry.
The ceremony has started and ended but the atmosphere never changed. So depressing and sad. He never liked it like this. Everyone around him was always smiling. His smile, was so radiant it lit up the room. His eyes, carried a bright shine and his personality brought joy to everyone around him. It was contagious. You just can't help but smile around him. He makes friends with strangers he meets on the street and plays with kids at the park. He is so nice. But it should be "was" now right? He did all these things but he can't anymore. Because of me. It's all my fault.
Soon everyone leaves to head home. I stay behind. After a full 10 minutes it's completely empty. I walk toward his tombstone. It's huge and shaped like a dragon. It's matches him. A big strong dragon.
I lift up my left hand and watches as the ring reflects the light coming from the sun. Why is it sunny? It's beautiful outside. But why? Why?
I feel my tears start to fall again. I rub them away quickly but there's more flowing down my cheek. The little streams are impossible to stop now. I'm hurting him again. I want to stop crying but I can't. My collapse and fall to my knees. I grip the edge of the tombstone like a life line.
"I'm sorry Natsu! I'm so sorry! If I hadn't yelled at you! If I hadn't said I hated you, you'd still be here! I didn't mean it Natsu! I love you! I love you so much! It's my fault your dead! It's all my fault!" I finally breakdown. The tears continue to fall.
"What do I do now? What do I do without you?"
'You live Luce. I'll be fine. So take your time to heal. I know you love me. I love you too. It's not your fault. Not at all.'
Live. Yeah, that sounds nice. I may not get married or find another love but I'm alive. I can live.
I'll never forget your radiant smile and bright eyes. I won't forget your peppy laughter or your ability to make people smile. You'll forever live inside my heart. Natsu Dragneel.
You can rest in peace with all your effulgence glory.
Kiyomi: I cried while editing this. I'm so weak to this stuff. Why do I torture myself. *Silently Cries* Kiyomi: Please review and give me advice to do better. The next theme is Future and I don't really know what to do so if you have ideas please help me. Thank you for reading!