AN: Ship alert! Jack and Sam share their first kiss under the strangest of circumstances. (The Broca Divide not included of course) Season 2. Jack/Sam. Humour/Romance. Rated K+ (disclaimer as per profile)

STUCK ON YOU

This was the fifth time in just under two years that Sam had found herself pinned to the ground by Colonel O'Neill and once again it was not how she wanted or imagined it to be. He was groaning and she could hardly breathe. "Sir?" she forced out.

"Gaaahhh!" He exclaimed and tried to lift his weight of his second in command but it was no use, he was pinned down. It was dark and he had no idea what had actually happened. "Wha' appen'd?" He had tried to speak normally but it came out all wrong.

"Cave in." Sam could barely speak. "Can't...Sir I can't..." She tried to pant, but it was no use. She needed his weight off her chest. When did he get to be so damned heavy?

Jack felt pain ripping through him, something was sticking into his leg, he had no idea what it was but up until that point he hadn't even noticed it. He had been too busy trying to get his knocked in brains thinking again. He inhaled sharply, the dust in the air caught in his lung and he couldn't help but start to cough painfully.

Sam had her eyes squeezed shut. The Colonel was coughing straight into her face and she didn't have enough room even to move her head away. She knew he couldn't help it and just hoped he wouldn't vomit on her too.

Jack fought hard to control the fit that had overtaken him. Just after it had started he realised that he was coughing directly over the top of her but he couldn't move his head to the side, something was holding him still from the neck down. Oh god he was paralysed! The shock stopped the choking and slowly it dawned on him that he definitely was not paralysed, he was in way too much pain for that. Something warm ran into his eye, he blinked it away.

Sam spat as Jack's blood dripped into her open mouth. She still could not breathe and the assault from his various bodily fluids was making her panicky. "Colonel O'Neill, Sir?" Her pitch was ranging too high, she fought for control.

"Yeah Carter." His reply was feeble and scratchy, not at all the calm reassuring tone he'd been hoping for.

"Is there anyway you could move, even just a little bit. I can't breathe and you're bleeding on my face."

"Bleeding?" Jack's eyes flew open, in the half-light he could see the dark spatters that were falling onto his 2IC and began to panic at the thought of being hurt so bad he didn't even realise it. Then he registered the other thing she had said. She couldn't breathe? Struggling, he managed to jerk one arm free and get it under him, he pushed with all his might and thunder sounded all around him.

The whole damned rock pile had shifted and Sam could breathe again. Not that it was doing her any good. She joined the Colonel as his coughing fit began again, the limestone dust painfully burning through her lungs. And there was a new problem. White lightening was radiating across the back of her hand and up her arm. She recognised the distinctive sharpness that could only mean broken bones. Her left hand was now completely trapped by a boulder from the slide. "Oh, godddddd!"

"Haaarrrrgggg!" The Colonel empathised. "What happened?" he asked, only just vaguely aware that he might have asked that before.

"Rocks." Sam replied, knowing it was enough.

"Rocks." Jack echoed, trying to get the word to mean something. Suddenly it did and he finally knew what had happened. The stupid cave roof had fallen in. "Danny, Teal'c?" he asked.

"Still on the surface." Sam knew now that she had to get to a radio but both her hands were completely immobilised. "Colonel, can you reach your radio?"

He shifted his position and the earth moved around them, skittering down the back of his neck and freezing his motions. "Okay that's not a good idea." His brain was finally starting to crank itself up to a normal level...or something.

"No Sir." Sam agreed, fully aware of the shift in tension of his body. "Maybe they heard the fall and are already trying to get us out?"

"Good thinking Captain, keep it up." Jack knew he sounded desperate but he was. This was not his idea of a fun day out.

Carter didn't bother to 'yessir', thing's were just a little tight for full military protocol. Besides his face was a mess and she needed all her energy to keep herself from looking horrified. His handsome features looking disfigure and gruesome. She knew it was just the play of the half-light and the blood but still her adrenaline filled mind sought out the worst case scenario and for some reason it had settle on the fact that she was being pinned down by an orc from Lord of the Rings. She shook the idiotic notion off and tried to focus on something more tangible.

"Carter?"

"Colonel?"

"How are we gonna get out of here?"

"I have no idea Sir. Like I said maybe Dan-"

"Yeah sure but wouldn't they have found us by now if they were close by?"

He had a point. "Maybe...probably...yeah." She hurt too much to argue optimism.

Jack sighed and dropped his head onto her neck. He didn't care that he was ridiculously close to his second and that by all rights he should be the one who was trying to figure all this out, he was just in too much damned pain. Sam's body shifted under his and he chose to think even harder about the pain that he was in, anything but her lean figure pressed up against his own. Like this was the time for that! Like there ever was a good time for that!

For the longest time they just lay there, both at a loss as to what to do and both hoping that someone would come find them. Then Jack lost all the feeling in his left leg. "Sam I can't feel my leg anymore."

"Crush syndrome Sir, it's quite common for people in our position to experience it?"

"What totally screwed?"

Sam, despite herself, started to laugh. 'Totally screwed' was so the right description for their situation. "No Sir, not totally screwed, not yet anyhow." That had come out all wrong, it came out seductive. He was staring at her, his eyebrows raised.

Jack felt himself crack up with laughter. "Well much as I'd like to oblige Captain I don't think that would be a good idea right now, do you?."

She giggled. "No Sir, we might make the earth move!"

He was laughing again and he had no idea why, the situation wasn't funny at all and yet still he heard himself say. "I'd move Heaven and Earth for you Carter, you know that."

"Yessir I do but right now I'd settle for just the earth."

He listened to her as her laughter continued after his had stopped. Then he found his free hand, the only piece of his body that he could move, running over her face, trying to wipe the dirt off of it but he was just spreading it further over her features. "Jeez Carter, I'm sorry."

She sobered and looked at him. "What for?"

"I dunno really. Getting you stuck down a hole with me. For not being able to think of a way out of this. For..." He found himself staring into her blue eyes. Even in the dim light he could see their shade. Something clicked inside of him and did the best, most stupid thing of his life. His lips clamped onto hers and he didn't let go. He knew she couldn't move away but she made no sound of protest. In fact she was kissing back. He really hadn't been expecting that.

They were trapped in a cave with the oxygen getting thin and if someone didn't come for them soon they were probably going to die from their injuries but right at that moment Samantha Carter did not care. She was being kissed by Jack O'Neill and it was wonderful. He finally broke from her and she immediately chased him, catching him twice before his head was outside of her limited range. He had gone completely still his eyes closed tight.

"Damn it." he exclaimed quietly.

"Sir?"

"Exactly."

Sam didn't understand, what was that supposed to mean? Slowly she figured it out. Holy Hannah the air was thin down here. "Ah, Colonel…"

"I should never have done that, I'm sorry Sam."

"Hey don't worry about it. If I'm to die down here I'd rather die happy." She attempted a shrug and mostly failed. "You can always blame it on the oxygen deprivation."

"Is that what this is? I was wondering! Here was me thinking it was my proximity to you that was causing..." He realised he was still talking out loud. She was staring at him now and not in a way he had seen before. What was that she had said about dying happy? His mind was working too slowly. Did that mean? Cautiously he used his fingers to push her hair back from her face, he needed to be certain. He could get in a whole heap of trouble over this that was for sure. Suddenly he became aware of a new sensation. It seemed his hand wasn't the only part of his body that was free to move after all. 'Oh god!' He shifted his weight a little causing more dirt to fall onto her face.

"Sir please don't move. I can put up with your 'sidearm' digging into me." Sam blinked, had she actually just said that? By the look on his face she had.

To try to distract himself from her comment, he swiped at the new dirt on her cheek. "Close your eyes." he commanded gently.

Sam felt his breath as he blew the fine dust particles off her face.

"Is that better?" he asked softly.

"Much." She could hardly speak she was so flustered. "But they're still some in my mouth." 'Shut up Sam!' This was the most ridiculous situation she had ever been in, but with all his talk of proximity and his rising need she was feeling giddy and a little reckless. His mouth was on hers again and she felt her heartbeat rise. His tongue was running along the edge of her lips so she parted them for him, her physical pain forgotten.

There was just enough of a gap for him to slip inside her mouth and taste the acridness of the dirt and the iron of his own blood. She ran a gritty tongue along his own and he found himself laughing into her mouth. As quickly as he could he sobered up again, she wasn't laughing, she was demanding. It was amazing how despite the fact that she could not move a muscle he still knew she wanted him. Something spoke to him, maybe it was her scent. Or maybe even the shift in urgency of her breathing, the feel of her heartbeat under his own. He didn't know, he didn't really care. All that mattered was that Sam Carter wanted him. He and his Captain were sharing their first real kiss.

He was still totally devoting all of his attentions to her when Sam noticed the pillar of light forming above his head. It took a moment to figure out what was going on. It wasn't until a face appeared and she squeaked that he pulled away.

"Captain Carter, Colonel O'Neill. It is good to see that you are both faring well under these difficult circumstances." The Jaffa's tone was more than a little ironic.

Jack froze solid and stared at Sam's caught-in-the-cookie-jar expression. He knew he wore the same face. He also knew by the heat spreading over his neck that he was the same furious colour of red. To try and ease the situation he fell back on an old friend. "About bloody time Teal'c, so you going to get us out of here or what?" Beneath him Carter grinned. Man how he loved sarcasm.

The end…or should I say the beginning?

AN: Okay so no idea where that one came from but it was fun :)