Ciel hasn't been one to show emotions and if you seen his past you wouldn't question it at all. Sebastian isn't one for emotions either, which is why they probably click so well. Though Sebastian would like him to show him some kind of emotions, which is what they were fighting about this morning. Though Ciel ordered him out of the room, so they never finished their argument. Sebastian nods and leaves out of the door sadly, he really shouldn't have said what he said but it was the truth.
Just a few minutes ago:
"Ciel" asks Sebastian
"Yes, Sebastian?" asks Ciel
"I have an odd question to ask you." says Sebastian
"As my boyfriend or as my butler?" asks Ciel
"As your boyfriend" says Sebastian, putting on his shoes
"What is it?" asks Ciel
Sebastian didn't know it but Ciel's nervous heart was beating fast. He thought that this whole thing was going to end in a matter of moments. He didn't want it to, he loved his butler and wanted to be with him. He was comfortable with the way things are going. He opens his eyes and looks at his butler's eyes.
"I was wondering why you don't show emotion." says Sebastian
"I do too" says Ciel
"Don't lie to me. I know you better than that." says Sebastian
He didn't realize that he didn't until Sebastian said that.
"What do you mean?" asks Ciel
"I mean, I've only heard you laugh once, if it's not something to do with you being upset you don't show it." says Sebastian
"You know, I'm not good at emotions." says Ciel
"You were at one time, according to Lady Elizabeth and Tanaka." says Sebastian
"...that was a long time ago." says Ciel
"Are you still thinking about your past?" asks Sebastian
"Yes." admits Ciel
Sebastian starts to get irritated with that excuse, he wouldn't in normal circumstances but in this situation he can't help but do so.
"That's always what you fucking say. I'm not them!" says Sebastian
"No you rescued me from that, stop reminding me about that!" says Ciel
"That's not what I am meaning, I barely bring that up." says Sebastian
"Then what do you mean?" asks Ciel
"I mean show some damn emotion and making that your excuse for not showing some!" says Sebastian
He instantly regretted saying that, it just slipped out. He goes to immediately to take back what he said and apologize, but he doesn't get the chance too.
"Get out" mumbles Ciel
"I am really sorry, I didn't mean it." says Sebastian "Well not in that way."
"I don't care, get out now! It's an order!" says Ciel
Sebastian sighs and leaves sadly, he really didn't mean to do that to him.
Back to now:
Ciel laid down in bed and thought about what Sebastian said and the past. He did blame it on his past a lot but emotions now are really hard for him. Tanaka comes into check on Ciel, he's having a good day today which works for Ciel.
"I screwed up grandfather." says Ciel
"How so?" asks Tanaka
Ciel explains the fight he had with Sebastian, and Tanaka listens to the whole story beginning to end.
"I am not going to take sides but I will say this, you were such a happy child growing up and it hurt seeing you upset and hurt like you were. I wanted to help you but there was nothing I could do but be there for you. Follow me, I want to show you something." says Tanaka
Curious, Ciel got up and followed Tanaka to his room, Tanaka got out a photo album and flipped to a picture of Ciel when he was nine.
"That's me" says Ciel
"Yes it is, I kept it all this time. You were always so happy. There wasn't a time you weren't a happy child. Sure you'd cry, but that's normal, then when you came back I saw something in you changed. You weren't the same child you were only a few weeks before when this photo was took. Your eyes weren't full of life anymore, something in you said 'I'm broken', anyone who didn't know better would excuse it as you grieving over your parents but not me. I don't know what happened and I'm afraid my old heart couldn't take it. However I did still love you as I do now, your life in your eyes is starting to come back slowly. It's like something inside you snapped you back to life. I know you still have a long road ahead of you but I will be here for you. You still struggle with emotions, it's a rare moment anymore to see a smile on your face." says Tanaka
Ciel nods and listens to the story completely, he didn't know that at all.
"I didn't know I was doing it" says Ciel
"I know, Ciel and Sebastian does too." says Tanaka
"Then why did he say it?" asks Ciel
"He was hurt and frustrated just in general." says Tanaka
"What do I do?" asks Ciel
"I can't answer that young master, you have to find that answer yourself." says Tanaka
Ciel nods and gives Tanaka a hug slowly.
"Thank you, grandfather" says Ciel
Tanaka smiles and hugs him back.
"Anytime" says Tanaka
Ciel got back up and went on thinking as he does his work. He blushes when he gets an idea but it's the only thing he has. He is going to try to show more emotion but it will be a struggle to do so. He goes to a nearby mirror and looks in it, he makes a natural smile. He actually likes his smile, he can see why Tanaka misses it. He even remembers how everyone was trying to get him to smile and he burst out laughing. He relaxes and practices new emotions as he goes on through the day, he tries to avoid Sebastian as he doesn't know what to tell him yet. He finally figures out what he wants to say and calls for Sebastian, Sebastian comes up and bows in respect to Ciel.
"You wanted to see me, young master?" asks Sebastian
"Yes" says Ciel
He comes over and kisses Sebastian shyly, Sebastian was in shock but scooped him up sitting in the big chair in the office. Ciel broke the kiss to catch his breath only to go back in and kiss him again, Sebastian kissed him back smiling feeling Ciel smile in the kiss. Ciel broke the kiss again and coughed.
"Easy." says Sebastian
"Y-yeah" says Ciel, catching his breath
"What's this all the sudden?" asks Sebastian
"I'm sorry about earlier. Your right." says Ciel, and that was hard enough for him to say
Sebastian shakes his head and holds Ciel close.
"No, I'm sorry I was out of line and shouldn't have said that. You went through hell." says Sebastian
"I should show more emotions. But it's hard for me, Sebastian." says Ciel
"I understand. But I'm not going to force you to show your emotions. I don't have a right to." says Sebastian
"I want to try...um...I ...umm….Sebastian…." says Ciel
He's trying to ask for help but like showing emotions this is new to him he doesn't want to know what to do.
"Ciel?" asks Sebastian
"Will you help me?!" he asks shyly, turning red
Sebastian smiles and kisses his cheek.
"Of course." says Sebastian
Ciel relaxes glad he doesn't have to do it alone this is very hard for him.
"We can start now." says Sebastian
"Pervert." says Ciel
"Not that way." says Sebastian, he chuckles. "There's other ways to make someone happy, young master."
"Like what?" asks Ciel
"For one would you like some chocolate young lord?" asks Sebastian
"Yeah." says Ciel, a smile creeping on his face.
Sebastian smiles seeing his smile on his face.
"Almost. I will be right back." says Sebastian
He sets Ciel down and goes to the kitchen and returns with a lot of chocolate. Ciel smiles wider and eats it happily.
"Delicious as always." says Ciel
Sebastian bows and helps the young earl to his lap cuddling him close.
Ciel closes his eyes smiling still, he always loved these moments with Sebastian, not that he would admit it. He has too much pride to do so, but baby steps.
"I love you" says Ciel
"And I you" says Sebastian
Ciel leans up and kisses Sebastian again, Sebastian kissing back happily. Holding his shy puppy close, both getting happier.
The End