Your hands itch. You're stuck waiting for Karkat in a small room, and it is taking far to long for a motherfucker to get his show up on.
You can't but wonder what's taking him so long. Did he get lost? Did he get distracted by something? Maybe he forgot all about you. Maybe some motherfucker decided to pick a fight with your little diamond.
That thought makes your stomach twist. Who would be so cracked in the pan enough to pick a fight with a highblood's moirail, especially one that's well known for having rages.
You want to go out and search for him, but you know you can't. He has to find his way to you.
If any motherfucker tried to lay a finger on what's yours- NO! You start pulling at your hair. Karkat is not an object that you own. You don't control him no matter much you want to tear a troll to pieces to prove he's yours.
Messiahs you hate this room, you let go of your hair and start clawing up the walls. You want to go out and find Karkat and keep him to yourself always. you know he wouldn't like that at all and probably get all depressed.
The thought of Karkat crying almost makes you cry.
You sit down on the floor and start rubbing your eyes. He's gonna be here soon, just wait. He's gonna be here soon just wait. He's gonna be here soon just wait, He's gonna-
He pries your hands off of your face. You realize you were scratching yourself. He pulls you into a tight embrace.
You want to rip your teeth out. One by one, then dig your claws into your bleeding gums.
Soft hands are gently papping your face.
Sometimes you wonder what it would feel like to tear out someone's throat and paint your face with their blood. You to grin with blood dripping from your lips. You start to hiss.
He holds your face in his tiny hands. "Gamzee."
Your eyes snap to his and you bite your tongue. "Shoosh", he kisses your nose. "Breathe slowly". He rubs the back of your neck.
You have a fleeting thought to bite his fingers off, but you melt in his hands and whimper like a kicked barkbeast.
He inhales with you, and breathes out "Shoosh".
You lay down on his lap and curl around him. You think you start crying and he starts rubbing circles on your back. You take a deep breath and nuzzle into him.
You don't think you'd ever want to leave.