Always, Always, Always a Bridesmaid

by arysa13

A 27 dresses AU

"Monty, you're late!" Clarke chastised as her friend from work ran up the church steps towards her wearing a suit. He glanced at his watch and back at Clarke in confusion.

"I'm only one minute late," he pointed out.

"You aren't supposed to be later than the bride. What did you do to your hair?" Clarke frowned, patting his fringe.

"Uh, nothing?" Monty shrugged.

"And that is entirely the problem," Clarke sighed. "Come on, the ceremony starts in ten minutes!" She grabbed his hand and dragged him inside to where the other bridesmaids and groomsmen were waiting. Clarke dropped Monty's hand and made her way over to where Maya was sitting on a bench chewing her nails.

"Maya," Clarke said gently, taking the girls hands in her own so she'd stop biting her freshly manicured nails. "Take a deep breath." Maya nodded and breathed in, closing her eyes as she released her breath. "You're marrying the love of your life. You have nothing to be worried about!"

"It's not that," Maya whispered. "It's just… all those people looking at me," she shuddered. Clarke pushed aside Maya's giant white dress and sat beside her, putting her hands on her shoulders reassuringly.

"Maya," Clarke said, looking her into her eyes sternly. "Once you get out there and see Jasper waiting for you, you aren't going to even notice anyone else. Trust me," Clarke assured her with a wry smile.

"Okay," Maya smiled shakily and Clarke stood up.

"Are you ready?" Clarke asked. Maya nodded and Clarke walked over to Monty, taking his arm and pasting on her bright wedding smile.

"Are you okay?" Monty asked her.

"Of course I am, why wouldn't I be?" Clarke replied, looking at the doors, ready for the music to cue them to walk into the church and down the aisle.

"You seem stressed," Monty said in concern.

"I'm fine," Clarke asserted. "This is what I live for." Monty nodded as the music started and the two of them led the procession into the church. The truth was, she was a little stressed, but it was only because she was supposed to be at a different wedding in an hour and a half. But she couldn't tell Monty that, he already thought she was crazy enough for how much she loved weddings.

The two of them reached the alter and parted ways and Clarke glanced at her silver watch surreptitiously, hoping this would be over quickly.

As anxious as she was, the smile that spread across her face as she watched Jasper's face light up when Maya walked in was completely genuine. It had always been her favourite part of weddings; the look of awe on a person's face when they saw their soon-to-be-spouse. The glint in Maya's eyes and her shy smile was enough to tell Clarke that she had been right, and Maya wasn't even aware there was anyone else in the room.

As soon as the ceremony was over, Clarke raced out of the church and hailed a taxi. Jasper and Maya were off to get some romantic photos taken and wouldn't miss her for a while, as long as she was back in time for the reception.

Clarke scrambled into the back seat of the taxi with her bag stuffed full of her bridesmaids attire for her ex girlfriend Lexa's wedding. Some may find it weird that she was the maid of honour for her ex but Clarke was happy to do it, and neither Lexa or Costia seemed to find it strange.

"I will give you three hundred dollars for the whole night on one condition; you don't look in the rearview mirror or I deduct. Got it?" Clarke said to the taxi driver. He nodded and she gave him the address of Lexa's wedding ceremony before hurriedly unzipping the back of her mountain of purple tulle.

"Hey, what are you doing?" she heard the taxi driver cry. Clarke clutched the dress to her chest, glaring at the taxi driver accusingly.

"You just cost yourself twenty bucks," she warned. "Are you sure you want to keep this up?"

"No," the taxi driver sighed.

"Alright then," Clarke said as the driver focused his eyes back on the road and Clarke resumed undressing, pulling pins out of her updo and slipping into the flowing green gown that Costia had picked out.

She made it to the gardens with twenty minutes to spare and Lexa pulled her into a brief hug as she raced into the rotunda where half the wedding party was waiting.

"I can't find my head thingy," Anya whispered to Clarke so that Lexa wouldn't overhear.

"It's okay, I have spares," Clarke returned, pulling a garland from her bag and placing it on Anya's head.

"Thanks," Anya nodded gratefully and the procession began.

Clarke managed not to glance at her watch at all through this one, but as the sun sat on the horizon, bathing the brides in golden light, her smile felt more and more forced. Not because she wasn't happy for the couple, but because she was worried Maya and Jasper might start to miss her soon.

"Congratulations," Clarke said into Lexa's ear as she kissed her on the cheek after the celebrant declared the pair married.

"Thanks!" Lexa was smiling from ear to ear and Costia was positively glowing as their friends and family crowded around them.

"I really have to go to the bathroom," Clarke said, motioning in the direction of the bathrooms. Lexa nodded before her attention was taken by someone else coming up to congratulate her and Clarke picked up her skirts and ran towards the waiting cab, holding the wreath on her head.

The rest of the night was a blur of changing dresses and driving back and forth between dances, cake cutting and speeches. Both weddings were beautiful in their own right, Lexa and Costia's was like a midnight fairy party beneath the stars where the guests all kicked their shoes off and danced in the grass, while Maya and Jasper's was like Cinderella's ball, with glittering lights and elaborate flower arrangements and enormous dresses. Clarke couldn't help but feel proud as both couples thanked her for all her hard work and dedication in their speeches.

Monty nudged Clarke affectionately when Maya called out her name.

"Thank you so much Clarke for making sure this day turned out to be perfect!" Maya said into a microphone, glancing at Jasper who nodded appreciatively and raised his glass of champagne to her.

"Okay, I'm going to throw the bouquet now!" Maya announced, turning her back to the crowd as the women gathered excitedly behind her. Clarke's heart raced as she found a place in the middle of the group. It was a silly tradition, she knew. Lexa and Costia hadn't even considered doing it. And of course Clarke didn't really believe that if she caught the flowers she would be the next one married. But she wanted it all the same. So Maya tossed her bouquet over her shoulder and the whole world seemed to slow down as the roses soared straight towards Clarke. She stretched out her fingertips and she could almost reach it, but at the last second an elbow came out of nowhere and hit her in the head, sending her crashing to the floor and the whole room went dark.

---

When she opened her eyes she found herself staring into the concerned brown eyes of a freckled stranger, and she wondered for a moment if she was actually dead and this beautiful stranger was going to lead her into the afterlife. This thought was immediately dashed by the acknowledgment of the fact that if she were dead her head wouldn't be throbbing quite so badly.

"Are you alright?" he asked, his voice deep and smooth.

"Uhh," Clarke groaned as she sat up. "I think so."

"Can you remember your name?" he asked, cocking his head to the side.

"Clarke," she told him.

"I'm Bellamy," he grinned. Smooth. "Can you stand?" Clarke nodded and he helped her to her feet. She stumbled slightly, putting a hand to her head. He reached for her to steady her but she held out her hand to stop him. "No, I'm okay, thanks," she said confidently. She went to take another step only to stumble again and grab on to him for support.

"Maybe we should get you a cab," Bellamy suggested. Clarke nodded and let him take her elbow and lead her outside. Most of her things were already in her taxi, but she picked up a huge flower arrangement from one of the tables as she passed.

"I need this," she told Bellamy.

"Okay," he chuckled. "Why don't you let me carry it?" He took the ornament from her arms and continued to lead her outside. He seemed to know there was a taxi waiting for her and led her straight to it and helped her inside before getting in himself.

"No, you don't have to-," she started.

"Let me make sure you get home safe. You might have concussion, I don't want you to fall asleep," Bellamy said. Clarke nodded and gave the taxi driver her address. "I love the dress. You kinda look like a princess," Bellamy grinned.

"Thanks," Clarke replied, smothering a smile. Was he trying to flirt with her?

"Nice thong, by the way," Bellamy said and Clarke could hear the amusement in his voice.

"Excuse me?" she said turning to face him, unsure if she'd heard him correctly.

"I saw you drive past earlier when you were changing gowns. You were in two weddings in one night, weren't you?" he shook his head. "Kind of upsetting don't you think?"

"Well, they're both really good friends of mine and their weddings were on the same night, what was I supposed to do?" Clarke defended, though she wasn't sure why she felt the need to.

"That's not what I meant," Bellamy snorted. "I mean how could you bear it? Isn't one wedding bad enough?"

"I love weddings," Clarke declared a little haughtily.

"Oh yeah? Which part? The forced merriment, the horrible music or the bad food?" Bellamy rolled his eyes.

"Actually, it's meeting upbeat people like yourself," Clarke returned with a sarcastic smile. "What is it you do again?"

"I'm a writer," Bellamy told her.

"Uh huh. Okay well, this is my building," Clarke told him, a little relieved she didn't have to keep having this conversation with him. She rummaged around in one of her bags until she found her wallet and pulled out some cash. "Here, you go," she said, handing it to the taxi driver. "One forty. You know what you did."

She gathered up her mess of things and Bellamy grabbed the flower arrangement.

"What are you doing?" she said as he got out of the taxi. "Hey, I've got it!" she yelled at Bellamy. "He's going to be right back," she told the taxi driver. She slipped out of the taxi and rounded the back of the car to take the flowers from Bellamy.

"Don't you think it's a whole lot of ritual for something that, let's face it, has about a fifty-fifty shot of making it out of the gate?" he put forth.

"How refreshing, a man who doesn't believe in marriage," Clarke sighed, grabbing for the flowers, but Bellamy held them out of reach.

"I'm just trying to point out the hypocrisy of the spectacle," Bellamy shrugged. Clarke glared at him. The more he talked the more she wanted to slap him. Hadn't she just said she loved weddings? Why did he feel the need to make her feel bad about that?

"That's so noble of you," she said sarcastically. "Do you also go around telling small children that Santa Claus doesn't exist?"

"So you admit that believing in marriage is kind of like believing in Santa Claus?" Bellamy smirked, a glint in his eye like he knew he'd won. Clarke gave a groan of frustration, rubbing her head with her hand.

"No!" she cried. "Ugh, I don't know why I'm arguing this with a perfect stranger. But, yes, marriage, like everything good and important, isn't easy. Cynicism, on the other hand, always is," she gave him a pointed look and grabbed the flowers from his arms. "It was very interesting meeting you, goodnight!" she turned and headed into her building, glad to see the last of that guy. Gorgeous or not, he was a complete asshole.

"How many weddings have you been in, by the way?" he called after her. "Just like, ballpark?" Clarke ignored him and went inside. "Alright, princess, I'll see you round!"

Once she was in her apartment she put the flowers on the kitchen counter and changed into something more comfortable, hanging the purple ballgown and the dress from Lexa's wedding in her closet with her other bridesmaids dresses.

It was late, but Clarke had been busy with wedding things all day and hadn't had a chance to sit down and relax, so she grabbed the paper and settled down on the couch, opening the paper to her favourite section, wedding vows. She fell asleep on the couch, content in the knowledge that just because one jackass thought marriage was a waste of time, that didn't mean the whole world was going to give up on the beauty of weddings.

---

Clarke was almost late to work on Monday morning, though her idea of late was not being at least fifteen minutes early. She spent the whole morning searching for her diary, the one that she had her entire life organised into. It was safe to say she was freaking out a little that she still couldn't find it.

"Have you seen my diary?" was the first thing she asked Monty when he walked in the door of their workplace. She'd already asked Harper, the receptionist, and Harper had seemed less than concerned that it was missing.

"Nope, sorry," he shook his head. "What happened to you on Saturday?" he asked, following Clarke into her office. "You were barely there and then you were gone. Did you meet someone?" he raised his eyebrows suggestively.

"No!" Clarke scoffed. "Did you?"

"A gentleman doesn't kiss and tell," Monty tapped his nose and laughed as he left Clarke to it. She searched her desk again, and sighed in defeat when she still couldn't find her diary. Ten minutes later, Monty was back with two coffees.

"Don't you have work to do?" Clarke asked him, taking one of the coffees. "Finn is going to be back today and I want everything to be perfect."

"Of course, everything has to be perfect for Mr. Collins," Monty winked.

"Stop it," Clarke rolled her eyes. "You know he doesn't like to be called that. Now either go back to your desk and do some work, or help me pick the best pictures for the fall catalogue."

"Catalogue it is," Monty grinned. Clarke sighed and led him out of her office to a spare meeting room where she had all the photos spread out over the table, ready for Finn to come and give his opinion on. Clarke straightened up the pictures and studied them intently, while Monty was busy watching her.

"Clarke, I hate to be the one to break it to you, but I don't think a bunch of photos is going to make Finn wake up and realise he's madly in love with you," Monty sighed sympathetically.

"I'm not-," Clarke started but was interrupted by Harper knocking on the doorframe. Clarke and Monty glanced up to see her standing there with a beautiful bouquet of flowers.

"Clarke? These just came for you," Harper said. Clarke stepped over to the door and took the flowers from Harper.

"There's no note," she said to Monty, her eyes lighting up.

"Clarke," Monty warned. "Don't get your hopes up, they probably aren't even from Finn."

"Harper, can you take these to my desk?" she said sweetly, while giving Monty a death stare. "Will you stop it? Nobody knows!"

"Everybody knows. Except Finn," Monty told her.

"It's true," Harper interjected before carrying the flowers off to Clarke's office. Clarke sighed and put her head in her hands. She heard the elevator ding then, and a dog bark, as Finn's dog, Gatsby, ran into the office, followed by Finn himself.

"Hey Clarke, hey Monty," Finn nodded as he walked into the room.

"Hi," Clarke replied, unable to stop the enormous grin from spreading across her face.

"Welcome back," Monty said to their boss before making himself scarce.

"How was it?" Clarke asked Finn.

"It was great, you know. We got a lot done and I think those kids are really going to benefit from the school we built," he shook his head, smiling nostalgically.

"You are so great," Clarke sighed quietly.

"Hmm?" Finn looked up at her.

"Uh, I said… that sounds great," Clarke covered, turning a little pink.

"Yeah," Finn nodded. "So how did you manage here without me?"

"Well, everybody missed you a lot, but I managed to keep things running smoothly," Clarke assured him.

"From the looks of things it seems like you don't need me at all," he chuckled.

"Of course I do! I mean, of course we do," Clarke corrected herself. "So you have a design meeting at eleven and tonight is Harper's engagement party."

"Thanks Clarke, what would I do without you?" Finn smiled before heading off to his own office. Clarke sighed and watched him go.

---

After work, Clarke drove over to the airport to pick up her sister, Raven. Well, they weren't actually sisters, but they may as well have been. They'd known each other since they were toddlers, and Clarke's parents had taken care of Raven whenever Raven's own mother was AWOL.

Raven had been living in California for the last year and Clarke had barely seen her, so when she spotted her best friend at arrivals in the airport, she ran to her and threw her arms around her.

"It's been way too long," Raven laughed, hugging her back.

"I know! Come on, let's get you home," Clarke grinned, pulling away and picking up Raven's suitcase, leading her to the car.

"So basically I'm taking some time off work because I'm not sure it's really what I want to do," Raven told Clarke. She hadn't explained much on the phone so Clarke let her tell her the story of why she was there. "And you know, things with Wick weren't really working out so I told him I needed space."

Clarke was surprised by both of these developments, as Raven had wanted to be a mechanical engineer ever since she was ten years old and Abby took the girls to the science centre. Raven had been enraptured by how everything worked, while Clarke was more interested in the aesthetics of the place, much to her doctor mother's disappointment.

As for Raven's break up with Wick, Clarke had thought the two of them were perfect together, and Wick seemed to really care about Raven. But Clarke kept her mouth shut, she knew Raven wouldn't like Clarke to criticize her choices.

They arrived at Clarke's apartment and Clarke showed Raven to the spare bedroom before Raven crashed on the couch and Clarke got her a drink.

"What are these?" Raven asked, amusement in her voice. Clarke looked up to see Raven holding the wedding announcements she'd cut out from the paper. "Wedding announcements?" Raven teased.

"Oh um… yeah… no," Clarke stammered, embarrassed. "I was just going to… recycle them." She gave Raven her glass of coke and snatched the papers from her hands.

"Into what? Wallpaper?" Raven laughed. Clarke sighed and rolled her eyes.

"No. Look…" Clarke sighed again. "It's just this one guy. Malcolm Blake… I only keep his. I don't know. I just love the way he writes and the stories," she smiled to herself. She glanced at Raven who she could see was not paying any attention. Clarke remembered that Raven had always thought traditional weddings were kind of sexist.

"Never mind. It's not really your thing. So anyway, I have this work party tonight, do you want to come?" Raven screwed up her nose.

"I think I'll pass. I was going to grab a beer with my old friends. Haven't seen them in a year," Raven said.

"Fair enough," Clarke nodded. "Well, until then, do you want to eat burgers and play Mario Kart?"

"Do you even have to ask?" Raven laughed. "I don't know why you bother though, I always kick your ass!"

---

Harper's engagement party was being held in this kind of dingy bar, and while it wasn't really Clarke's style, it suited Harper perfectly.

"Hi!" Harper cried when Clarke and Monty arrived, throwing her arms around her and then Monty.

"Congratulations," Clarke smiled, though she'd already congratulated Harper when it first happened. But that was what you said at engagement parties.

"Thanks," Harper smiled. "And thanks so much for organising everything!" Clarke felt a hand on her shoulder then, and her stomach flipped over when she saw it was Finn.

"Congratulations, Harper," Finn smiled.

"Thanks Finn! And thanks for the gift," she said, before being dragged away by her fiancé.

"What did I get them exactly?" Finn asked Clarke.

"Champagne glasses and a bottle of Cristal," Clarke told him.

"Great," Finn nodded gratefully. "By the way, did you get that thing I left on your desk this morning?" he asked, looking a little unsure of himself. Clarke's mind immediately flew to the flowers that had been delivered for her.

"On my desk?" she asked, half holding her breath, wanting to make sure she was right before she made a fool of herself.

"Yeah… was that… uh, okay?" Finn asked. Clarke nodded enthusiastically.

"Of course, yes! It was… perfect," she smiled giddily. He bought her flowers!

"Okay, good," he seemed relieved. "I mean we've never had that kind of relationship before and I just wanted to make sure you were okay with it." Clarke nodded again, unable to say anything else. "I'm going to get a drink, do you guys want anything?" Finn asked.

"I'm good thanks," Monty replied, holding up his beer. Clarke just shook her head and Finn winked and headed over to the bar.

"Oh my god, he bought me flowers," she whispered excitedly to Monty.

"This is so great," Monty hugged her. "You should go over there and tell him how you feel."

"Right. Yeah," Clarke nodded, looking in Finn's direction. But she couldn't move.

"Clarke?" Monty prompted.

"I'm going!" Clarke replied, taking a deep breath before walking towards Finn. He had his back to her, but he turned around as she approached. He didn't even seem to notice her though as his gaze flitted right over her and landed on someone else in the crowd. Hang on. Was that… Raven? Clarke watched in horror as Finn and Raven's eyes met across the crowd like some terrible romcom and they made their way towards each other. Clarke's feet kept moving but she felt sick to her stomach and she wasn't entirely sure her brain was working. Eventually the three of them came together and Raven glanced at Clarke.

"Clarke?" she said, snapping Clarke out of her trance.

"Right, uh, Finn, this is my best friend Raven, Raven this is Finn… my… my…," she stammered, unable to get the words out. A few more minutes and maybe he could have been more than her boss?

"Clarke is my assistant," Finn finished for her. "Basically, whatever I need, she takes care of," he said, not even glancing at Clarke, and when he put it that way, Clarke couldn't help but notice how pathetic it sounded. "And as if I don't take enough advantage of her already, today I left my dry cleaning slip on her desk." Clarke's entire illusion crashed around her then and she closed her eyes for a moment to collect herself. His dry cleaning slip. Of course he hadn't sent her flowers. How could she be so stupid, honestly?

"Well, I'm sure it was an emergency," Raven smiled flirtatiously.

"Oh, of course, I was down to my last pair of socks," Finn grinned. How were they flirting about dry cleaning? "Do you want to get a drink?" Finn asked Raven.

"Sure," Raven nodded and followed Finn to the bar, and Clarke was left standing by herself. That was until an unwelcome familiar face popped up beside her. Clarke couldn't stop herself from groaning out loud.

"Nice to see you too, princess," Bellamy grinned. "Were the flowers too much?" Clarke stared at him in disbelief.

"They were from you?" she said, her voice a little faint. How was this happening.

"Yep!" Bellamy didn't seem to notice her utter disappointment and just grinned wider.

"The angry marriage hater?" she said, feeling less disappointed now, and more completely enraged. "God. That's just great." She put a hand to her head, trying to will herself to be polite to this asshole.

"Uh, you're welcome?" Bellamy said. "Here. I came here to give you this," he said handing over Clarke's missing diary.

"Oh my god, thank you!" she grabbed the diary and hugged it to her chest. She still didn't love the guy but she didn't hate him as much as she had two seconds ago. "I've been looking for this everywhere."

"You left it in the cab on Saturday," Bellamy informed her. "It was either tonight or Thursday's bikini wax," he smirked.

"Ew, you read it?" Clarke screwed up her nose. Talk about invasion of privacy.

"Well, I tried to read it. Your handwriting is impossible. You know they have apps for that," he said helpfully.

"I don't have an iphone," Clarke told him, holding up her flip phone from five years ago.

"Yikes," Bellamy's eyes widened. "Anyway, can I buy you a drink?"

"Uh, no thanks," Clarke rolled her eyes. "Look, it was nice of you to bring back my diary, but I'm not interested."

"It's just a drink, Clarke," Bellamy said wryly. "You look like you could use one." Clarke looked at him suspiciously, but his concern seemed to be genuine.

"I'm sorry, I just don't think I'm going to be much fun tonight," she sighed. Bellamy nodded.

"Okay, no problem. Maybe I'll see you on Thursday," he said with a smirk. Clarke rolled her eyes as he left, and for a second she smiled to herself before remembering her best friend was currently hitting it off the man of her dreams. She made her way over to the bar where Raven and Finn were drinking and laughing.

"Hey, I think I'm going to take off," she let them know, hoping maybe Raven would want to leave too. "You must be exhausted, right Raven?" she said hopefully.

"Not really," Raven replied, not getting the hint at all. "Hey Finn, do you want to dance?"

"Absolutely," Finn answered eagerly. "I have to warn you though, I'm a terrible dancer," he chuckled.

"Maybe I can show you some moves," Raven suggested, leading Finn onto the dance floor, Clarke totally forgotten once again.

She went home anyway, not bothering to let Monty know she was leaving. He seemed wrapped up in some guy anyway and she didn't want to disturb him. While she tried to get some sleep, all she could think about was Raven and Finn together, what they were doing, what they were talking about. She kept thinking she heard footsteps, or the door opening, but she was disappointed every time.

At 3am she heard the door open for real, and she threw herself out of bed to meet Raven in the living room. Raven was grinning stupidly but she stopped short when she saw Clarke.

"Clarke! What are you still doing up?" she asked as the smile spread across her face again.

"Oh I had some work to do," Clarke lied.

"Oh my god," Raven sighed happily. "I think I just had the best night of my life." Clarke blanched.

"Oh right, I totally forgot you went out," Clarke grimaced, trying to fake a smile. Raven was too elated to notice Clarke's weird behaviour.

"It's not weird for you is it? Me going out with Finn?' Raven asked.

"No, of course not! Why would it be weird? He's my boss," Clarke said, her voice a little too high. Raven was still oblivious.

"Good! Cause we're going out for lunch tomorrow," Raven grinned.

"Awesome," Clarke said flatly.

"So tell me about Finn," Raven said, pulling Clarke onto the couch.

"Oh…" Clarke sighed. She glanced at Raven, looking at her like a wide eyed child waiting to hear a bedtime story, and Clarke couldn't help but smile. "Well… he dropped out of college. Then he spent three years volunteering in remote communities in Africa, building schools and stuff. He does every year now. Then he started the magazine which you know is all about what we can do to achieve world peace," Clarke told Raven, unable to stop herself from gushing about Finn.

"Wow," Raven said, suitably impressed.

"Yeah," Clarke agreed. "And that's all before he's thirty. He's such a great boss. Everyone loves him. He loves dogs, he's a vegetarian and he hates anything unhealthy. He's all about peace and harmony and he doesn't believe in violence of any kind, he just loves being outdoors," Clarke continued, hardly even remembering she was talking to Raven, and just thinking about how great Finn was, and all the reasons she loved him.

"He sounds amazing," Raven sighed. Clarke suddenly remembered she was there. She worried that she'd made Finn sound too good.

"But he has flaws," she said quickly.

"Like what?" Raven asked, looking slightly worried.

"He hates… cashews. Which is weird. And sometimes he doesn't wear socks with sneakers. I just think that's gross," Clarke said. Raven laughed at her attempt at saying bad things about Finn.

"Come on, Clarke, those aren't exactly deal breakers," Raven snorted.

"Wait, what deal? I mean are you two…" Clarke gulped, trailing off.

"We'll see," Raven winked. "Well anyway, I'm exhausted, I think I'm going to head to bed. Goodnight!" Raven leapt up off the couch and practically danced to her room, and Clarke wished she didn't feel so miserable at her best friend's happiness.

---

Clarke was feeling defeated as she walked into her office the next day.

"What's up?" Monty asked her, wandering in behind her. "Why do you keep disappearing on me?"

"Sorry… you looked busy," Clarke shrugged.

"Is everything okay?" Monty asked in concern, sitting on Clarke's desk. Clarke shook her head slowly.

"Raven and Finn met last night," Clarke sighed. "And they hit it off rather well," she barked a short laugh, though she saw no humour in the situation.

"Oh," Monty said in understanding. "I'm sorry. But I mean she's leaving soon, right?" Clarke shrugged. Raven hadn't let her know how long she was staying, and it hadn't bothered Clarke until now. She loved having Raven around. She didn't love having Raven around Finn so much.

"I gotta get back to work," Clarke told Monty and he nodded and left her office. Clarke flicked open her diary, only to find a week missing. She flicked through the pages, growing more and more irritated as Bellamy Blake's name and phone number was written on every page. She groaned in exasperation and pulled out her ancient flip phone. Bellamy picked up on the first ring.

"Hello?" he answered.

"You ripped a week out of my planner!" Clarke accused. "Are you insane?"

"Hey, princess," he said and Clarke swore she could feel him smirking through the phone. "It's a little experiment, to see how you go without every second of your life mapped out," Bellamy chuckled. "By the way, your life is insane. What else do you do besides work and help people get married?"

"None of your business, asshole," Clarke snapped. She was beginning to regret calling him at all.

"Alright look, let me make it up to you," Bellamy said. "A new date book… or maybe just a date?" he suggested. Clarke bit back a groan of displeasure.

"Oh sure, let me just pencil you in. Except oh hey, you already did! Every Saturday for the rest of the year," she retorted. "Can you please find someone else to be creepy with?"

"Nope!" Bellamy laughed. "If you ever need someone to hang out with that doesn't need a dress fitting or a cake tasting, why don't you give me a call?"

"I'll be sure to do that." Clarke said sarcastically before hanging up. The nerve of that guy.

---

Raven showed up at the office at lunch time so that she and Finn could go out. Clarke watched bitterly as Finn greeted Raven with a kiss on the cheek.

"Clarke," Finn called.

"Mmm?" Clarke responded, pretending to be engrossed in her work.

"Raven and I are heading out for lunch, would you care to join us?"

"Oh," Clarke glanced at Raven. "No, I have so much work to do…" she said lamely.

"Come on, Clarke, you work too hard! Your boss is a jerk anyway," Finn grinned. Clarke sighed. She couldn't think of many things worse than third wheeling Raven and Finn, but she never could say no to him.

"Okay," she relented, grabbing her bag and following them out to Finn's car. Finn drove them to the park and pulled a picnic basket and rug out of his car before leading the girls to a nice grassy spot.

"I have to confess I bought these I didn't make them," Finn chuckled as he pulled some sandwiches out of the picnic basket.

"There's no meat in this, right?" Raven asked Finn.

"Well, I didn't know what you ate so I grabbed a few different things," Finn admitted. "You're a vegetarian?"

"Yeah, that's not a hassle is it?" Raven asked, while Clarke stared at her in disbelief. Raven was certainly not a vegetarian yesterday.

"No," Finn smiled brightly. "I'm a vegetarian too."

"Oh wow," Raven giggled and Clarke wanted to vomit. "It just makes me feel so much healthier. I rarely eat anything that's even processed. I don't want to put that kind of stuff in my body."

"I understand completely," Finn agreed. Clarke grabbed one of the sandwiches and bit into it to stop herself from interrogating Raven on her new found health obsession.

"It can be so hard sometimes though, like when I was volunteering in Ecuador, I just had to eat what was available and provided for me. Not that I'm complaining of course!" Raven laughed.

"You volunteered in Ecuador?" Finn asked, and Clarke could see him becoming more and more enraptured with Raven the more she made up lies about herself.

"Mmhmm," Raven nodded, taking a bite of her sandwich.

"I do a lot of volunteering as well," Finn told her.

"I believe that if everyone just pitches in and helps other people out, there would be no need for wars and we could finally achieve world peace," Raven said.

"That's what I believe! We have so much in common," Finn grinned. Clarke rolled her eyes.

"I need to go to the bathroom!" Clarke announced. "Raven, come with me?"

"Sure," Raven agreed. "I'll be right back," she said to Finn.

"What are you doing?" Clarke hissed as soon as Finn was out of earshot.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Raven replied.

"You're not a vegetarian and you love unhealthy food. And you never volunteered in Ecuador!" Clarke pointed out angrily.

"I thought about volunteering. And maybe I am a vegetarian now. How would you know?" Raven rolled her eyes.

"You ate a hamburger yesterday," Clarke reminded her.

"Whatever. What does it matter?" Raven shrugged. "Can we get back to Finn now?" Clarke huffed and Raven went back to Finn while Clarke actually went to the bathroom. When she returned, Raven and Finn had packed up the picnic.

"We thought we'd have a walk around the park before we head back to work," Finn said to Clarke.

"Okay," Clarke agreed, and was then forced to trail along behind as the two of them held hands and completely ignored her.

---

For two months it went on like this. Wherever Clarke went she was faced with the unbearable fact that her best friend was dating the guy she'd been in love with for four years. Harper's wedding came and went, and of course Finn took Raven as his date. He had pictures of Raven in his office. There were bouquets from him in Clarke's apartment, which Clarke had always dreamed about. But in her dreams they were for her, not Raven.

Clarke didn't want to be resentful. She was glad Raven was happy. She deserved it. But why couldn't Raven be happy with someone else? Someone she actually had stuff in common with, not someone she had to lie to in order to make him like her. On top of all the things she'd told Finn at the park, Raven had also led him to believe she hated video games and violence, when Clarke knew Raven loved both of those things. Clarke didn't understand in the slightest. Raven could easily make any guy fall in love with her just by being herself. Why was she pretending to be someone else for Finn?

Just over a month after Raven had arrived back, Finn decided to throw a party. Which meant, of course, that Clarke had to organise it. For what reason he wouldn't say, which made the organisation a little difficult. Finn instructed her to invite everyone from work, plus all her own friends and family, and the small amount of family that Finn had. She had a week to plan it. She managed to pull it off, as always.

"I knew you could do it," was all Finn said as they stood in his favourite restaurant which she had booked out for him, watching all the people laugh and talk and dance. "Would you mind getting everyone's attention?"

"Sure," Clarke nodded. She quickly went to switch the music off and came back to tap her glass. The murmurs around the room slowly came to a stop and everyone turned to her.

"Finn has something he'd like to say," she said, stepping back and letting Finn have the floor.

"I'm sure you're all wondering why I invited you here tonight," Finn began. "Although some of you may have guessed," he laughed. "Raven, could you come here?" Raven looked at him quizzically before walking over to him and taking his hand.

"Raven, I have never met anyone as amazing as you," Finn said to her, but loudly enough so the room could still hear. "I know this might seem sudden, but I know you're my soul mate," he continued, getting down on one knee. The whole room gasped and Clarke covered her mouth with her hands in horror. Raven's eyes were as wide as saucers.

"Will you marry me?" he finished, pulling out a ring box and opening it to reveal the biggest diamond Clarke had ever seen.

"Yes!" Raven cried. "Yes, of course!" Finn pushed the ring onto her finger delicately and standing up to hug her.

"I love you," he whispered, and this time it was quiet so only Raven, and Clarke, could hear him. Raven kissed him, and then they broke apart, while all the guests hurried over to congratulate them. Raven turned to Clarke excitedly.

"Congratulations," Clarke choked out as Raven threw her arms around her.

"Be my maid of honour?" Raven asked.

"Of course," Clarke whispered without hesitation, because, really, what else could she say? Raven squealed and hugged her tighter. "I'm really happy for you," Clarke said, hoping she sounded sincere.

"Thanks, Clarke, you're the best," Raven replied, letting Clarke go and turning to Abby who was waiting to hug her almost-daughter. Clarke slipped through the crowd and out the front door, feeling like she couldn't breathe. She felt utterly hopeless. She wanted to scream and cry, but she couldn't. She wanted to tell someone how awful this was, but no one would understand, except maybe Monty, but she knew even he was too nice to let her bitch about Raven's happiness.

Clarke pulled out her phone, and she knew she'd probably regret this decision, but she found Bellamy's name and pressed call.

"Princess," he answered.

"Do you want to get a drink?" she asked without thinking.

"I thought you'd never ask."

---

Twenty minutes later she was sitting at a bar with a drink and Bellamy by her side, feeling completely miserable.

"So, what's up?" Bellamy asked her.

"It's dumb," Clarke sighed.

"You can tell me," Bellamy coaxed.

"My best friend just got engaged," Clarke told him. He looked confused for a second and she knew he was wondering how the girl who loved weddings could possibly be upset about her best friend getting married.

"Before you?" he guessed and Clarke shook her head.

"That's not it…" she started. She glanced at him. How could she tell him Raven was engaged to the man Clarke was in love with? It was pathetic and humiliating. "It's just… I'm the maid of honour. She's going to want me to do everything."

"Why is that a problem? You live for that stuff," Bellamy reminded her.

"No, I mean everything," Clarke groaned.

"So just say no," Bellamy shrugged. "You have said no to people before haven't you?"

"Of course I have," Clarke snorted. Bellamy looked at her disbelievingly.

"Let's play a game," he suggested. "It's called The No Game. You're gonna practice saying no, got it?"

"This is dumb," Clarke complained.

"Alright, let's go," Bellamy said. "Clarke, give me fifty bucks," he commanded.

"No," Clarke replied. This game was easy.

"Come on, Clarke, it's just fifty bucks. I'll pay you back," Bellamy continued.

"No," Clarke said again.

"Clarke," Bellamy said, lowering his voice so he sounded all sexy and seductive. Clarke felt herself shiver as he took her hand and looked at her with those deep brown eyes. "I need you to give me fifty bucks." Man, he was good.

"No?" Clarke responded. Bellamy grinned and dropped her hand.

"Not bad," he nodded. "Can I have your drink?" he asked, reaching for it.

"Sure," Clarke said without thinking. "Wait, no!" she corrected herself, but he was already drinking it.

"So close," he laughed, and Clarke groaned but laughed along with him, dropping her head onto the bar, but somehow, she felt a little better.

"I should get back to the party," she sighed.

"We should do this again sometime," Bellamy suggested. Clarke studied him for a moment.

"Yeah, okay," she smiled. "I'll see you next time."

As it turned out, no one had even noticed she was missing from the party, not even Monty. As soon as she entered the restaurant again, her mood instantly dropped.

"Clarke!" Raven ran up to her. "Guess what?"

"What?"

"Your mom just said I could wear her wedding dress!" Raven squealed.

"She did?" Clarke said dumbly, paling at the thought. She had always thought she would be the one to wear Abby's dress. Raven didn't even like it, she thought the idea of white wedding dresses was archaic. Raven nodded excitedly.

"That's… wonderful," Clarke lied.

"You can wear it after me, of course," Raven told her.

"Yeah, of course," Clarke said faintly. Raven ran off again and Clarke went to find Monty, but he was unable to cheer her up.

---

"Okay, so Finn wants two groomsmen plus his best man, so that means I have to find another two bridesmaids, who do you think I should pick?" Raven asked. "I don't have a lot of friends who are girls." They were sitting in Finn's apartment, since they'd just helped Raven move in there. She only had a couple of suitcases so it didn't take long.

"What about those friends you caught up with the other night?" Clarke asked.

"Oh, they were guys," Raven said.

"So just have guys," Clarke shrugged.

"Clarke, we're talking about bridesmaids here. They can't be men," Raven snorted. Clarke frowned at Raven. As long as Clarke could remember, Raven had hated the idea of traditional weddings.

"If I get married, I'm going to wear red, and instead of a bouquet of flowers I'm going to have a cat," she had announced when she was eight. So Clarke couldn't figure out why she cared what gender her bridesmaids were. Was it all for Finn?

"What's wrong?" Raven asked, noticing Clarke's troubled look.

"Nothing," Clarke shook her head. "It's just… I didn't realise this was the kind of wedding you wanted. But if it is, I just want you to be happy, you know that," Clarke smiled. "I could ask my friends Harper and Maya if they want to be your bridesmaids," Clarke suggested.

"Thanks Clarke," Raven smiled. "So anyway, I've decided to have the reception at the boathouse, like Abby and Jake did, what do you think?"

I think that's what I wanted to do for my wedding, Clarke thought.

"I think it sounds perfect," she said instead.

"Great! I called them this morning and they said they didn't have any availability for a year," Raven said. Clarke breathed a sigh of relief. She had plenty of time to figure out this wedding. "But then the ninth time I called they said they had a cancellation! Long story short, we're getting married in three weeks!" Raven squealed.

"Three weeks?" Clarke repeated in disbelief. Raven nodded.

"I know it seems soon, but I know you can pull it off. It's what you're best at!" Raven hugged her and Clarke didn't have the heart to tell her no. "Oh, and guess what!" Raven burst out, pulling away.

"What?" Clarke asked hesitantly. It seemed like lately everything that Raven was excited about made Clarke want to die.

"That writer you like? Malcolm Blake? He wants to do a story on us! He called me, can you believe it?" Raven shook her head.

"Wow," was all Clarke could say, and Raven didn't seem to notice her lack of enthusiasm, and instead started rambling on about whom she wanted to invite to the wedding.

---

Clarke met Raven and Finn at the bakery the next day to order the cake.

"It has to be sugar free," Raven told the baker. Clarke rolled her eyes and Antoine looked scandalized. They had already picked the design they wanted, and Antoine had already complained about only having three weeks to make it.

"Ignore her," Clarke said. "Can you do the cake or not?"

"I can," Antoine sniffed.

"Good," Clarke smiled. "We have a cake," she said, turning to Raven and Finn. She did a double take as she saw Bellamy walk in the door, the last place she expected to see him.

"Bellamy?" she said with a half smile. "What are you doing here?" He glanced at her but ignored her question, instead approaching Raven and Finn.

"Hi, I'm Malcolm Blake," he introduced.

"Oh, hi!" Raven grabbed his hand and shook it. "I'm so happy to meet you! I'm Raven and this is Finn," she gestured to Finn just as Finn's phone started to ring. He pulled it out as he shook Bellamy's (or was it Malcolm?) hand.

"Nice to meet you," Finn nodded. "Sorry, I have to take this." Finn exited the shop as Clarke stared at Bellamy/Malcolm in disbelief.

"This is my best friend, Clarke," Raven introduced as Clarke glowered at Bellamy/Malcolm. "She's like obsessed with your stories. She keeps them but pretends she doesn't. She's your number one fan." Clarke shot Raven a look. "Not in a creepy way though!" Raven amended.

"I'm very flattered," Bellamy/Malcolm smirked and Clarke wished she could punch him right in his stupidly handsome face.

"You said your name was Bellamy… as in… Bellamy," Clarke accused.

"It is," Bellamy nodded. "I use Malcolm for the by line so I don't get stalked by crazy brides… or crazy wedding fans," he said, a mischievous glint in his eye. Clarke scoffed and Bellamy turned to Raven.

"So how did you and Finn meet?" Bellamy asked.

"Well-," Raven started.

"You're an asshole," Clarke spat, and Raven looked at her in shock.

"Clarke!" she scolded.

"He said his name was Bellamy," Clarke defended. "I'm a little confused."

"You guys know each other?" Raven asked in confusion.

"Well, we both work the wedding circuit," Bellamy joked.

"Can I talk to you for a second?" Clarke said through gritted teeth, grabbing Bellamy by the arm and dragging him away.

"What's up?" Bellamy asked as if he didn't already know.

"You lied to me," Clarke stated, not meaning to sound so hurt.

"No," Bellamy contradicted. "I told you I was a writer. I didn't tell you what I wrote."

"But you write the most beautiful things," Clarke protested a little desperately. How could this marriage hating jackass be the same man who told the stories she loved so much? "Do you actually believe in love and marriage and pretend to be a cynic?" she asked hopefully. "Or are you a cynic who knows how to spin romantic crap for girls like me?"

"I didn't catch any of that, but I think the second one? The spinning crap one?" Bellamy shrugged. How could he be so blasé about this, when Clarke felt like she'd been punched in the stomach?

"God," Clarke shook her head. "This is the worst day of my life."

"Malcolm?" Raven called. "Can we start the interview now?"

"Sure," Bellamy nodded at Clarke and went back over to Raven, leaving Clarke feeling angry and dejected. She had thought she could count on Bellamy to be honest with her, even if he was a total dick. Turns out he was also a dishonest dick.

---

Clarke was cleaning the kitchen that afternoon when someone knocked on her door. Squinting through the peephole she saw that it was Bellamy.

"What do you want?" she snapped. "Raven isn't here."

"I came to see you," he told her.

"Why?" she asked suspiciously.

"I have to talk to all the family and friends," Bellamy pointed out. Clarke exhaled dramatically.

"Fine," she opened the door and stood in the doorway.

"Uh, can I come in?" Bellamy asked.

"Just ask me what you want to ask me," Clarke said with a fake smile. "Or would you prefer to lie some more?"

"I didn't lie!" Bellamy denied. "Would you stop saying that?"

"Can we just get this over with?" Clarke sighed, letting Bellamy inside.

"The maid of honour is a peculiar young woman," Bellamy said into his phone, which he appeared to be recording into, causing Clarke to roll her eyes. "So, tell me how you feel about Raven's whirlwind romance."

"I couldn't be happier," Clarke lied and Bellamy gave her a knowing look. Right, she'd already complained to him about it. She led him into the living room, but he caught a glimpse of the closet in the hall, bursting open from all the dresses she kept stashed inside, and stopped dead in his tracks.

"What are those?" he asked.

"Nothing," Clarke said quickly.

"Are those…" he started taking a step towards the closet.

"No," Clarke said stepping towards him. Bellamy glanced at her and they took off at the same time, racing towards the closet. Bellamy and his long legs beat Clarke to it and he swung the doors open and gaped at the explosion of colour.

"Bridesmaids dresses?" he finished. He reached out and pulled at the skirt of one. "You kept all of them?" he said incredulously. "Why?"

"I have a lot of friends, and I like to keep them," Clarke replied defensively.

"Okay, I totally get it, because you know, these are…" he pulled out a particularly heinous maroon dress, "…beautiful," he raised an eyebrow at her.

"Some of them are not that bad," Clarke raised her chin and folded her arms.

"Seriously? I'd like to see one of them that's not that bad," Bellamy challenged. Clarke glared at him.

"Fine," she snapped, turning to look in the closet. She rifled through the mess of silk and tulle before pulling out an olive green satin dress with a sash around the knees. "This one is really…" Clarke showed it to him.

"Hideous? Was that the word you were looking for?" Bellamy supplied. "This is a horrible colour… what is it? Vomit?"

"It's like olive green. Look, I know it doesn't look like much on the hanger, but it looks great on," Clarke persisted.

"Uh, no," Bellamy shook his head. "This is an instrument of torture inflicted upon you by a bride who wants you to look ugly," he said knowingly.

"No!" Clarke protested. "Fox picked it because it looks good on everybody." Bellamy pulled out his phone and started recording again.

"Slightly delusional and will believe anything anyone tells her," Bellamy said into his phone, as he smirked. Clarke narrowed her eyes. He was laughing at her. She grabbed his hand and pulled the phone to her mouth.

"That is not true and I am going to show you you are wrong," she said before marching into her room with the dress. She pulled off her clothes and put the dress on before stepping out to show Bellamy.

"See?" Clarke gestured down her body and Bellamy snapped a picture of her on his phone. Clarke frowned at him.

"Okay, you're totally right about the dress," Bellamy relented, walking over to her and showing her the photo. "But the colour?" he screwed up his nose.

"I think it's just your phone… if you just you know… okay it's not very good," Clarke had to agree. The dress really made her look terrible.

"You look like a shiny mermaid," Bellamy laughed and Clarke screwed up her face in protest. "Hey, you should be flattered. She didn't want to stand next to a curvaceous, beautiful woman and have her looking decent," Bellamy shrugged and Clarke ducked her head to hide her blush. She wasn't sure if she was blushing because he called her curvaceous or because he called her beautiful.

"Well, uh, it's really not the worst one," Clarke laughed to hide her embarrassment. "If I had to pick one…" she walked back over to the closet and searched through the dresses. "This," she pulled a huge yellow dress from the closet, "would be my favourite."

"Oh my god," Bellamy looked at the dress in horror.

"Theme wedding," Clarke laughed.

"What was the theme? Humiliation?" Bellamy guessed.

"Gone with the Wind," Clarke corrected him.

"Well, put it on," Bellamy urged. Clarke hurried back into the bedroom and changed into the dress before coming back out to show Bellamy. She posed and he snapped a picture of her. "I'm so sorry you had to wear that," Bellamy shook his head. "Okay, show me more, I want to see them all."

Soon she found herself putting on dress after dress, and she was actually enjoying herself. It was fun to get to put the dresses on again, and have someone to enjoy them with, even if he thought most of them were ugly. He took pictures of her on his phone while she posed, until finally she was down to the last dress, which was the one she'd worn to Maya's wedding, though he'd already he seen it.

"I need to take a picture for comparison purposes," he told her. After he snapped his last picture, Clarke sat down in the purple princess dress and Bellamy joined her on the couch.

"I still don't get why you need to keep them all," Bellamy said.

"I know it seems weird to you," Clarke sighed. "But I've had some really good times in those dresses. I don't care if someone wants me to wear a funny dress. It's their day, not mine," she glanced at him and he was looking at her thoughtfully, and she wondered if he understood.

"And you know, if supporting them when they get married means snowshoeing to a mountaintop in the Alps, or helping to caulk a fountain for some swans…" Clarke continued.

"Wait, you actually did that?" Bellamy raised an eyebrow.

"Oh, I'm really a very good caulker," Clarke said seriously.

"Likes caulk," Bellamy said into his phone and Clarke snorted with laughter.

"Seriously, though, how much time do you spend doing this for other people?" Bellamy asked her. "What about you?" Clarke smiled sadly.

"Someday," she sighed, "I hope, it will be my turn, and then all those people will be there for me. I mean, if I ever…" she glanced up and Bellamy took a picture of her. She looked away, disappointed that he still thought it was a joke.

"Sorry," he said lamely.

"You don't get it," she shook her head. "I don't know why I thought you would." She stood up. "You can go now." Bellamy nodded and Clarke showed him to the door before getting back into her normal clothes and putting all the dresses away. Why was it that whenever she thought she could actually be friends with Bellamy, he had to go and ruin it?

---

Somehow Clarke got stuck with Bellamy again while registering Raven for wedding gifts. He was following her around, not being any help at all.

"Could you go away please? I did not invite you," Clarke snapped as he looked over her shoulder while she picked out the items Raven apparently wanted.

"Well, luckily, Raven did. When I cover a wedding I have to see every aspect," Bellamy informed her.

"Well, could you at least help instead of standing around getting in my way?" Clarke huffed. "I'm not in the mood for this."

"Why, what's wrong?" Bellamy asked, picking up a random bowl and scanning it.

"How do you know it's not just you?" Clarke snorted.

"Call it intuition," Bellamy smirked. Clarke glared at him.

"Fine. If you must know, one of the bridesmaids pulled out and Raven wants me to find someone else. The wedding is in less than two weeks. It's impossible," Clarke groaned.

"Maybe I can help," Bellamy offered.

"Really? You know someone who would be willing to be a bridesmaid for a total stranger at such short notice?" Clarke asked disbelievingly.

"I have a sister," Bellamy said. "I'm sure she'd be happy to do it."

"Well… okay," Clarke agreed, not feeling like she had much choice. Raven wanted three bridesmaids and it didn't matter who they were. Clarke grabbed a casserole dish a scanned it.

"Dear god, another one?" Bellamy scoffed. The gratitude Clarke had felt a second ago evaporated.

"To you, this is just another casserole dish. To Raven, it's the casserole dish she's going to cook the Christmas roast in," Clarke informed him icily. She picked up a vase. "And this is the vase that Raven will use when Finn brings home flowers, just because he felt like it," Clarke continued.

"Oh, I get it," Bellamy nodded and Clarke pursed her lips at him, knowing he didn't get it at all. "And this," he gestured to an umbrella stand, "this is the rooster shaped umbrella holder that will hold all of Finn's umbrellas," he smiled sarcastically.

"Ugh," Clarke groaned. "What I'm trying to say is, these are the things that make up a life together. It's not just stuff."

"No, these are the things the seventy billion dollar a year wedding industry has convinced us that we all need to have or we won't be happy," Bellamy declared.

"You know what? I think that all your statistics and theories are just a smoke screen," Clarke said knowingly.

"Oh yeah?" For what?" Bellamy challenged.

"For whatever secret it is you have," Clarke shrugged. "Your parents got divorced, you haven't found the right girl, you're afraid you never will," she teased maliciously.

"Well, I think you love weddings so much, because you'd rather focus on other people's Kodak moments than make memories of your own," Bellamy retorted.

"Oh right, because a wedding is the perfect place to forget about being single," Clarke scoffed.

"I think you want a wedding. Not a marriage, a wedding," Bellamy accused. Clarke felt like she could scream.

"What is your problem?" she snapped. "Did you have your own fancy wedding and your wife left you or something?" Bellamy hesitated and Clarke frowned, wondering why he hadn't come back with a witty remark yet.

"Bingo," he stated flatly. Clarke's eyes widened. "It was with my roommate from college by the way, so I think you get an extra bingo for that."

"Bellamy, I'm so sorry I didn't know… it was just a guess…" she apologised messily.

"It was a good one. For someone who has absolutely no insight into herself whatsoever, you certainly nailed me right on the head," Bellamy muttered bitterly. Clarke bit her lip, feeling like a total dick.

"Want to find the ugliest stuff in the store and register Raven for it?" Clarke asked.

"Absolutely," Bellamy agreed.

---

"So, your sister," Clarke said as they finished registering Raven for crappy gifts. "Are you sure she'll do it?"

"I can call her right now if you like," Bellamy said.

"That would be great," Clarke nodded. Bellamy pulled out his phone and dialled his sister's number.

"Hey, O, I have a massive favour to ask," he said, walking away so Clarke couldn't hear the rest of the conversation. He walked back a minute later, grinning. "She's coming to meet us at the bar just down the road. Care for a drink?"

The two of them walked to the bar and Bellamy bought Clarke a drink although she protested that she could buy her own drink.

"So what's your sister's name?" Clarke asked.

"Octavia," Bellamy told her.

"Older, younger?" Clarke asked.

"Younger. Five years younger. We're really close though. Our mom died when she was only fourteen so I've taken care of her ever since," Bellamy shrugged.

"I'm sorry to hear that," Clarke said. Turns out Bellamy had a more miserable past than she'd imagined.

"Don't be sorry," Bellamy grinned. "So what about you, any siblings?"

"Nope, just Raven," Clarke shrugged. "She's practically my sister."

"Speaking of sisters," Bellamy said, looking past Clarke to the door. "Here's Octavia now."

"Is this your new girlfriend, Bell?" Octavia asked as she flounced over to them.

"Ha, no. This is my…" he glanced at Clarke and she raised her eyebrows, interested to see how he'd introduce her. They weren't exactly friends, after all. "This is Clarke," he finished.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Octavia," she shook Clarke's hand and pulled up a set. "Now what's this about a wedding?"

"My best friend needs another bridesmaid since one dropped out. The wedding is in under two weeks. Care to help a girl out?" Clarke asked.

"This is probably the weirdest thing I've ever been asked to do," Octavia mused.

"I know, but I'm desperate," Clarke pleaded. Octavia glanced at Bellamy.

"Well, if it will help my brother get a date with you, then I'm in," Octavia grinned.

"O!" Bellamy groaned. "It's so not like that."

"I was kidding," Octavia huffed. "But I'll do it anyway," she told Clarke.

"Thank you so much," Clarke gushed, hugging Octavia. "Can you come to a dress fitting on Monday?"

"Absolutely," Octavia agreed.

"Thank you! I seriously owe you."

---

Clarke got a call from Finn on Saturday evening, asking her to come to the boathouse to help finalise the menu for the reception, and Clarke eagerly agreed.

"Sorry to ask you this on such short notice," Finn said, standing up as she arrived.

"No, it's fine! Raven's busy, I get it," she smiled. The caterer walked up to the table and placed a bottle of wine on the table.

"Now, we've planned your wedding dinner to your exact specifications," she said. "I'll bring you the first course."

"Wine?" Finn asked and Clarke nodded, fiddling with her necklace. It was wrong, she knew, to feel like she was on a date with her best friend's fiancé. But how could she help it? It was all innocent anyway, she was the only one who felt that way. The caterer brought out the entrée, which was four pieces of vegetarian ravioli.

"Raven is going to love this," Clarke lied, putting a piece of ravioli into her mouth. It was actually fairly tasty, but not Raven's style at all. Not that Finn knew that.

"Yeah, I thought so too," Finn nodded. "I can't believe I found her. The great thing about Raven is there's no bullshit, you know," he smiled. "She's not afraid to be herself." He put another piece of ravioli in his mouth. Clarke almost spat out the pasta she was chewing.

"Finn," she said hesitantly, after she'd swallowed. "About Raven… I think you should know…" she paused, looking into Finn's puppy dog eyes, trying to find the words to tell him that his fiancé had been lying to him.

"What is it?" Finn asked worriedly.

"I just… I'm so happy that you found each other," Clarke choked out, looking down at her food.

"Thanks," Finn smiled, relieved. The caterer took their plates and brought out the main course. "Hey, so, what's your favourite part of a wedding?"

"Okay," Clarke grinned, putting her fork down. "You know when the music starts and the bride makes her entrance and everybody turns to look at her?" Finn nodded. "That's when I like to look at the groom. 'Cause his face says it all, you know. The pure love there," she shook her head slowly, thinking about all the times she'd witnessed that look.

"So when you get married and you make your big entrance, I have full permission to look at the groom?" Finn clarified.

"Or bride," Clarke corrected him. "But please do. Please make sure the poor sucker is still standing there," Clarke laughed.

"Are you kidding? Someone is going to be so lucky to have you some day," Finn told her and she smiled sadly, wondering why it couldn't have been him. "And the way you attacked that ravioli before? Very sexy," Finn chuckled and Clarke couldn't help but laugh, leaning towards him subconsciously.

"Blake?" Finn said in confusion. Clarke looked up to see Bellamy walking towards them.

"What are you doing here?" Clarke asked in annoyance.

"You guys picking out the wedding meal? Where's Raven?" Bellamy asked pointedly, and Clarke glared at him.

"She's busy," she said through gritted teeth. "I'm just helping out."

"Right," Bellamy nodded, clearly not convinced.

"We're heading up to Rhinebeck to pick out some linen from an antique store," Finn told Bellamy, glancing at his watch.

"Are you in hurry? Cause I could go instead," Bellamy offered.

"No!" Clarke protested. Finn gave her a strange look.

"Would you mind? This has taken longer than expected and Raven and I are supposed to be having dinner with my parents later," Finn said. Clarke looked at him in surprise, as she had thought this was dinner, though an early dinner albeit.

"Yeah, it's no problem," Bellamy nodded. "I've got a couple more questions to ask Clarke anyway. For the article." Clarke wanted to protest some more, but she knew she would just come off looking like a petty child, so she shot Bellamy a dirty look, grabbed her bag and said goodbye to Finn before storming off to her car, leaving Bellamy to follow. He got in the passenger side without saying anything, and Clarke started the car and drove off in silence.

As if to mirror Clarke's stormy mood, the sky grew dark and it began to pour rain as she drove out of the city. She and Bellamy stayed silent for a while, she was seething, while Bellamy was staring stonily ahead and Clarke couldn't help but wonder what his problem was.

"Why can't you ever just mind your own business?" Clarke finally broke the silence.

"Oh, excuse me," Bellamy retorted. "I'm so sorry for interrupting an evening of you pining over someone you'll never have!" Clarke gasped audibly.

"That is so-," she started to protest.

"No wonder you were so upset when they got engaged. You're planning your best friend's wedding to the man that you're in love with!" Bellamy snorted.

"You have no idea what you're talking about," Clarke huffed. "I'm thrilled to be planning their wedding!"

"Oh yeah, then why have you been complaining to me about it at every possible opportunity?" Bellamy fired back. "God, I can't believe I didn't see it before." He shook his head.

"Would you just shut up?" Clarke groaned. "Why do you even care?"

"I don't," Bellamy said quickly. "I just think… look will you slow down so I can read this sign?" he said, changing the subject. Clarke narrowed her eyes and put her foot down on the accelerator.

"Seriously, crazy lady? We're going to hydroplane, so would you slow down?" Bellamy ordered.

"We are not going to hydroplane," Clarke replied acidly, one second before she lost control of the car. "We're hydroplaning, we're hydroplaning!" she squealed. She tried to slow down and tighten her grip on the wheel, but it was too late and the car went skidding off the road and into the mud. They missed a tree by a narrow margin and Clarke breathed a sigh off relief before spinning the tires through the mud. They were stuck.

"Don't say anything," Clarke said.

"Uh…" Bellamy started.

"I said nothing!" Clarke snapped. Bellamy closed his mouth. They both got out their phones to call someone, but Bellamy's was flat and Clarke's last century flip phone couldn't find any reception.

"Great, just great," Clarke groaned.

"I think I saw a tavern back a mile or so," Bellamy said helpfully. Clarke didn't reply, just got out of the car in the pouring rain and starting marching in the direction of the tavern while Bellamy trailed after her. Could this day possibly get any worse?

They were soaking wet when they reached the tavern, and as it turned out things could get worse, as the payphone was out of order.

"Excuse me," Clarke said, approaching the barman. "Your payphone's out of order."

"Nice work. You're like one of those guys on CSI or somethin'," the barman rolled his eyes. Clarke huffed in annoyance.

"Well, could we use your phone? You see-," she started to explain but Bellamy was sitting down at the bar.

"Can I get a scotch, neat?" he said.

"What are you doing?" Clarke asked as the barman nodded and prepared Bellamy's drink.

"Well it's late, I'm wet and we're not getting a tow," Bellamy said matter-of-factly. "I'm gonna have a drink." Clarke frowned disapprovingly. "Come on," Bellamy urged, pulling her onto a bar stool. "Why don't you lighten up for once? There's no one you can help right now." Clarke sighed and relented.

"I'll have the same as him," she told the barman. They downed their drinks and sat in silence for a moment as Bellamy motioned for another round. "You know what I still don't get?" Clarke burst out suddenly.

"What?" Bellamy replied, though he didn't seem that interested in what she had to say.

"How is it that you spend all this time at weddings, writing about how wonderful they are, and still not see the beauty in it?" Clarke said, sounding almost disappointed in his complete lack of belief in the concept of marriage.

"Because there's no beauty to see!" Bellamy told her. "I told you, it's all lies."

"What about that couple you wrote about last year, the Allen's? They grew up together but they were separated because Penelope's mother didn't approve, but they found their way back to each other after fifteen years, and then they got married at the school where they first met? Is that a lie?" Clarke said, sipping her drink.

"Yep. It's all a load of crap. They are going to wake up one day and realise they wasted fifteen years of their lives pining for each other when they could have been making meaningful relationships with new people," Bellamy said.

"Meaningful relationships where they don't get married," Clarke rolled her eyes.

"Exactly," Bellamy nodded. He finished his drink and Clarke followed suit. "Another?" Clarke nodded and the barman brought them another round.

"Alright, February 12th 2012," Clarke said. Bellamy looked blank. "The Keller wedding!" Clarke prompted. "You wrote a column that moved me to tears. It was downright, flat out, the most beautiful thing I've ever read."

"Aw," Bellamy said patronisingly. "I don't remember it."

"Come on! It was the anniversary of the mother's death. The brother flew home from Iraq. You cannot fake emotion like that!" Clarke pushed.

"Oh, yes you can. A good writer can," Bellamy smirked.

"You're not that good," Clarke returned with a smirk of her own. "There's got to be one thing about weddings that you like," she said seriously.

"Hmm… open bar," Bellamy grinned. Clarke gave him a gentle slap. "Alright, alright," Bellamy sighed. "I guess… you know when the bride walks in and makes her grand entrance? I like to look back at the guy they're marrying… 'cause even though I think he's an idiot, he always looks really happy," Bellamy shrugged, looking a little embarrassed and Clarke gaped at him in disbelief.

"No way," she stated.

"What?" Bellamy looked up at her, sipping his drink.

"That's my favourite part," Clarke told him. Bellamy raised his eyebrows.

"I guess we do have something in common after all," he grinned.

"You know, I bet you're really a big softie. That this whole cynical thing you've got going on is just act so you can seem… wounded and mysterious and sexy," Clarke rolled her eyes.

"What was that last one?" Bellamy smirked. Clarke reddened as she realised what she'd said.

"Nothing," she said quickly, throwing back the rest of her drink so she didn't have to look at him.

"Sexy? Do you think I'm sexy?" Bellamy teased.

"No," Clarke denied, smiling despite herself.

"It's okay if you do," Bellamy bumped his shoulder against hers.

"I think you think you're sexy," Clarke recovered.

"Uh huh," Bellamy nodded, still smirking. Clarke shook her head and screwed up her nose at him. Bellamy started tapping on the bar as Bennie and the Jets by Elton John starting playing.

"Great song," he said, nodding along to the music.

"I love this song," Clarke agreed. Bellamy turned to her and started singing off key.

"Hey kids, shake it loose a lemon! Banana's made of something that's a gonna make a feather!" he sang. Clarke burst into laughter.

"Those are not the words," she laughed hysterically.

"Those are exactly the words!" Bellamy declared. "Sorry, lyric police, what are the words?"

"You're gonna hear a handsome music so the walrus sounds!" Clarke sang, almost as badly as Bellamy.

"Walrus sounds?!" Bellamy snorted. Clarke ignored him and kept singing.

"Penny's a logger in a cement jet! Ooh, but she so lays down!" Clarke banged her head and starting playing air guitar.

"Buh buh buh Bennie and the Jets!" the two of them sang together. It was strange, Clarke hadn't really had that much to drink, only three drinks, and yet she felt no inhibitions about acting like a complete idiot with Bellamy.

"Ooh in the wind and the waterfall! Baby she's a revocaine!" Bellamy screeched.

"She's got electric boobs!" Clarke sang.

"Boobs?!" Bellamy burst out.

"Mohair shoes!"

"You know I read it in a magazine! Oh oh!"

"Buh buh buh Bennie and the Jets!" they practically screamed together. People were watching them now as Bellamy stood up and took Clarke's hands and pulled her up with him spinning her around as they continued to sing.

"Woo!" someone in the crowd shouted.

"Get on the bar!" someone else shouted and Clarke thought, why not? She pulled Bellamy back towards the bar and climbed up, as he shook his head and watched her.

"Come on!" she cried. Bellamy continued shaking his head but followed her up. The barman looked at them disapprovingly but said nothing.

"She's got electric boobs and mohair shoes, you know I read it in a magazine! Oh oh! Buh buh buh Bennie and the Jets!" the whole crowd was singing along with them now. They danced along to the instrumental before Bellamy decided he'd had enough and climbed down. He held out his hand to Clarke and she took it jumping down and losing her balance slightly, causing her to crash into his chest.

"Sorry," she laughed, stumbling back, but he held her close. The mood between them changed then, and Clarke could feel her heart pounding loudly as she searched his eyes for some kind of clue.

"I cried like a baby at the Keller wedding," he confessed. Clarke wasn't sure who moved first, but in an instant their lips met, hungrily devouring each other like they hadn't been kissed in forever, and maybe they hadn't. She felt a jolt straight to her core as his tongue brushed hers and she let out a small moan. Her hand found its way under his still slightly damp shirt, and he pulled her closer before pulling away entirely.

"We should go back to the car," he suggested. Clarke nodded and Bellamy grabbed her hand and they ran out into the rain. It took them twice as long to get back to the car as it had taken to get to the tavern as they kept stopping to grab each other, kissing desperately and messily before heading on their way again.

They eventually made it to the car, and Bellamy pushed Clarke up against the door, engulfing her mouth with his own as his hands grabbed her ass. She was panting heavily, her arms around his neck, her fingers curled in his hair. The rain was still pouring down, and they were completely soaking wet again. Clarke reached behind her, still kissing him as she opened the car door.

"We should take our clothes off so we don't get sick," she breathed, pulling Bellamy into the backseat of the car.

"Smart thinking," Bellamy agreed, closing the door as he fell on top of her. He lifted his head to pull his shirt off and promptly hit his head on the roof of the car. Clarke burst out laughing as he rubbed his head. Bellamy chuckled and resumed undressing as Clarke did the same. Bellamy bent his head to kiss her again.

"Bellamy," Clarke whispered, suddenly nervous.

"Yeah, princess?" Bellamy responded quietly, pausing to look at her.

"I just want you to know… I never do this… I mean, well you know," she rambled. "Have sex with people I'm not dating, that is."

"It's okay, Clarke," Bellamy assured her. "We don't have to do this."

"No, I want to," Clarke replied, reaching up to bring his lips back to hers. "I want you."

---

Sometime during the night, after the most explosive sex Clarke had ever had, they slipped their clothes back on and fell asleep cuddling in the back seat. She woke to Bellamy opening the back door and handing her a coffee.

"Morning, princess," he grinned smugly and she smiled back, taking the coffee from him.

"Hi," she said, a little shyly.

"Tow truck's on its way," Bellamy told her and she nodded sipping her coffee. Bellamy stared at her and she got self conscious, glancing at herself in the rearview mirror. She ran her fingers through her hair, trying to fix her messy curls slightly. Rain plus car sex did not make for a good hair day.

"I think you look nice," Bellamy told her.

"Thanks," she replied, trying to hide her blush. They waited for the truck, and once they were back on the road, Clarke drove them to a café for breakfast. They went inside and ordered, not speaking. She wasn't really sure what to say. She knew their relationship had changed now, but she wasn't sure what it was. Were they friends? Was it just a one night stand? Clarke's stomach flipped over as she realised she didn't want it to be. But what did Bellamy want?

"Here's your order," the waitress brought them their bacon and eggs.

"Thanks," Clarke smiled. Some random guy bounded over excitedly.

"Oh my god, it's Bennie and the Jets!" he cheered. "You guys were so awesome!"

"Oh, thanks," Clarke said in embarrassment while Bellamy burst into laughter.

"Okay, I'll see you around," the guy nodded, wandering off.

"Oh my god, I can't believe we sang Bennie and the Jets last night," Clarke groaned.

"Forgot about that did you?" Bellamy laughed.

"I was trying to," Clarke replied.

"May I just say, you were a little pitchy," Bellamy teased her.

"Me? What about you? You hit notes only dogs can hear," Clarke retorted light heartedly.

"But I was in key at least, right?" Bellamy asked, grinning. Clarke shook her head, chuckling.

"Hey, aren't you that girl?" the waitress said as she passed by, stopping at their table.

"Yeah, I'm Bennie, he's the Jets," Clarke smiled with a glance at Bellamy.

"Hey, it's the girl from the paper!" the waitress called, ignoring Clarke's words.

"What paper?" Clarke asked in confusion, her smile dropping.

"Shit," Bellamy groaned and Clarke frowned at him. What was going on? The waitress handed her a paper, open to a page with a big picture of Clarke's face, surrounded by a lot of other pictures of her posing in bridesmaids dresses.

"Always, Always, Always a Bridesmaid, by Malcolm Blake?" Clarke read, her stomach dropping and her throat drying up. She looked back to Bellamy. "What is this?" she cried accusingly.

"Clarke-," Bellamy started. Clarke couldn't even bring herself to say anything as she threw the paper at him and stormed out of the café. "Clarke, wait!" Bellamy called after her, following her outside "Let me explain! I asked my editor not to print it! Clarke!" Clarke didn't even look back as she got into her car and slammed the door. He could find his own way back.

She drove slowly, not wanting to have to face anyone when she got back. She felt like such an idiot. She couldn't believe she'd slept with him, and worse still, actually trusted him. And maybe they hadn't exactly been friends, but somehow he was the only one she was able to vent to, and then he'd gone and betrayed her by printing her secrets in his dumb paper. She felt so used.

Raven was waiting for her in her apartment when she got back.

"What the hell, Clarke?" Raven accused, brandishing the paper at her.

"Raven, I'm sorry, I didn't know-," Clarke started.

"You're sorry? Do you even know what it says in here about me?" Raven cried.

"I haven't had a chance to read it yet," Clarke said, but Raven barely heard her.

"If Clarke is the prototypical accommodating bridesmaid, then her best friend Raven is cast as the overbearing, over indulged bride to be, who at any moment one worries, might start stomping around Manhattan, breathing fire and swatting planes from the sky" Raven read from the newspaper. "Clarke this article makes me sound like a Bridezilla! I'm going to kill this guy!" she screeched. Clarke's phone rang and Raven grabbed it.

"What?" she yelled into the phone. "Bellamy!" she screamed. "The only person you're going to be speaking to is my attorney! Asshole!" She hung up the phone and threw it at Clarke. "I've gotta get out of here. Oh, but you better alert traffic control, because Bridezilla's on the loose!" Raven yelled, grabbing her bag and storming out of the apartment.

Clarke picked up the crumpled newspaper and began to read the article. So this was what Bellamy thought of her. A pathetic loser who wasted her life helping other people with their weddings because she couldn't find anyone to love her. Clarke burst into tears then, big ugly sobs that she couldn't hold in any longer. It wasn't even just about Bellamy. It was about Raven and Finn and Bellamy and her mess of a life and the fact that she thought someone actually cared about her for a change. She spent the rest of the day curled up in bed with her phone off.

---

Clarke got multiple calls from Bellamy the next day but she ignored all of them. She didn't know what he could possibly have to say to her and frankly she didn't care. Except for the fact that she did care, a little bit. Every time his name popped up on her screen, her finger hovered over the answer button, strangely missing the sound of his voice. But she always let it ring out in the end.

Surprisingly, Finn wasn't mad at her at all.

"Clarke, the guy was a jerk," he assured her. "He took advantage of you." Clarke nodded. Finn didn't know the half of it. She was never ever telling anyone, not even Monty, that she'd slept with Bellamy.

"Thanks. I'm really sorry," she apologised.

"Seriously, Clarke, stop apologising and get back to work," Finn grinned.

"Yes, sir," Clarke smiled as best she could and headed back to her office. Her work phone rang and she answered it without thinking.

"Clarke Griffin?" a woman's voice said on the other end.

"Yes, who is this?" Clarke responded.

"It's Octavia Blake."

"Octavia?" Clarke questioned. Octavia was the last person she was expecting to hear from. Was she calling on behalf of her brother? Was she going to pull out of the wedding?

"I just want to say, I'm really sorry about my brother. He's a jerk. If I'd known what he was up to I would have stopped him," Octavia said.

"Well, thanks," Clarke sighed. "Are you still available for that dress fitting tonight?"

"You know it!"

---

Clarke was supposed to meet Raven, Maya and Octavia at the dress shop after work, but when Clarke got to her apartment, Raven was there waiting for her.

"Clarke," Raven said flatly.

"Raven? I thought we were meeting at the-," Clarke started.

"Clarke!" Raven cut her off, bursting into tears.

"Raven?" Clarke said in wonderment, walking over to her friend and putting her arms around her.

"Have I been that bad?" Raven sobbed, clearly talking about the article.

"Well, it's a bit of an exaggeration…" Clarke said slowly.

"God," Raven sat on the couch, looking forlorn. "I'm really sorry. I just wanted this wedding to be perfect." She had stopped crying already, and was wiping the tears from her face. Clarke paused for a moment before joining Raven on the couch.

"Why?" Clarke asked her.

"What do you mean why?"

"Why is this wedding so important to you? You always said you didn't want a traditional wedding so I don't get why you suddenly need the perfect white dress and three bridesmaids," Clarke said. "And why did you lie to Finn? You know he's going to find out you're not a vegetarian eventually. And your favourite show is Game of Thrones, he's going to figure out you love violence." Raven shook her head and clamped her mouth shut.

"We used to tell each other everything," Clarke reminded her. "What happened?"

"I just…" Raven sighed. "You want to know the real reason I came back to New York?" Clarke nodded. "I got fired from my job," Raven laughed bitterly. "And to top it all off, Wick dumped me. He said I never made and effort to do the things that he liked," Raven explained. "And then I met Finn, and he was so perfect and I thought about what Wick said and I didn't want to screw it up with Finn… so I fabricated a little. And then it was too late, and I thought if I focused on having the perfect wedding, the kind Finn wanted, I'd forget that he didn't really love me, and maybe I'd just become the girl I was pretending to be," she finished, and it strangely made sense to Clarke, even though she was sure Finn would have loved Raven even if Raven had told him the truth from the start.

"You have to tell him," Clarke said sternly.

"I know," Raven whispered.

"Now," Clarke urged. Raven nodded and stood up.

"Thanks, Clarke. And sorry, again," she smiled sadly. "You should probably cancel the dress fittings. I doubt there's going to be a wedding when I'm done."

Clarke did as Raven said and called Maya and Octavia to let them know not to come to the dress fitting. Maya seemed relieved.

"You want to get a drink instead?" Octavia offered.

"What?" Clarke said dumbly.

"You seem stressed. Let me buy you a drink to make up for my asshole brother," Octavia offered.

"Alright," Clarke sighed.

She met Octavia at the same bar they'd met at last time and Octavia bought her a drink.

"Again, I'm really sorry about my brother," Octavia apologised.

"You don't need to be sorry, it's not your fault," Clarke sighed.

"Look, Clarke, I know this is a long shot, but is there any chance you'd be willing to talk to him? He feels really bad," Octavia said. Clarke pursed her lips.

"No," she said shortly. She should have known Octavia was there on behalf of her brother. It's not like Clarke and Octavia were friends at all. Clarke downed her drink and stood up. "Thanks for the drink, I'll just be going now." She grabbed her bag and started towards the door, until she saw Bellamy walk in, and she turned and looked at Octavia accusingly. Octavia had the decency to look a little sheepish. Bellamy spotted the two of them and walked over.

"Clarke," he said, and Clarke refused to look at him.

"I'll see you guys later," Octavia said quickly and hastily made her exit. Bellamy wasn't saying anything so Clarke finally met his eyes, her glare icy and unforgiving.

"What do you want?" she said bitterly. "You want another picture for your paper?"

"Clarke, please," Bellamy said. "I am really sorry, believe me."

"Oh come on," Clarke rolled her eyes. "You used me to get ahead in your career. Be a man and admit it. Or don't, but please don't pretend like you give a shit," she spat.

"Will you please just let me explain?" Bellamy begged.

"No! It doesn't matter. I don't care," Clarke declared.

"Clarke, look, I know you probably won't believe me, but the other night meant something to me. For the first time in-," Bellamy was speaking quickly, trying to get as much out as he could before Clarke cut him off.

"I don't care Bellamy," Clarke cried. "I don't want your explanations or excuses. I trusted you. I opened up to you and you laughed at me, and then you printed it in your paper so that everyone else could share the joke." She brushed away an unwelcome tear.

"It wasn't like that. I know I fucked up. But when I started writing that article, before I got to know you, I had no idea…" he trailed off.

"No idea of what?"

"Look, it doesn't matter. I just came here to apologise. I wasn't really expecting you to forgive me," Bellamy shook his head. "So, I'm sorry. And now I'm going to turn around and vanish, and you'll never have to see me again, I promise. But I want you to know… I think you deserve more than what you've settled for." He nodded definitively and turned to go, before turning back to her awkwardly.

"I forgot to give you this," he held out an iphone box with a ribbon tied around it. "So you don't have to carry around that crazy diary from 1987." Clarke just stared at him "Okay, will you please just take it so I don't feel like such a jerk." Clarke held out her hand and he placed the box in her palm before nodding again and leaving the bar.

Raven was there in Clarke's apartment again when she returned from the bar. Her face was tear-stained and she threw her arms around Clarke as soon as she walked in the door.

"The wedding's off," she sobbed. Clarke just nodded and held her best friend.

---

Clarke, Raven and Monty sat on Clarke's couch watching a movie and drinking beer when Clarke's phone rang. Her old phone that is. She hadn't bothered even turning the phone Bellamy had given her on. It was only her mother so she didn't bother picking up.

"Why are you still using that old thing?" Monty asked. "I thought you said Bellamy gave you an iphone."

"Yeah, I know you hate him, but it's a really good phone. You should probably use it," Raven agreed.

"I don't hate him," Clarke muttered, barely loud enough for the other two to hear.

"What was that? You don't hate him?" Raven said incredulously. "Don't you remember what he wrote about you? And me?"

"I remember," Clarke sighed. "And he was right. It was all true."

"Well… maybe," Raven agreed reluctantly. "But he still shouldn't have written it."

"Where's the phone? I demand you use it," Monty chuckled. Clarke pointed into her bedroom and Monty went to get it.

"It's really a shame he turned out to be such a jerk," Raven shook her head sadly. "He was cute."

"I know," Clarke sighed as Monty came back to the couch with the phone. He turned it on and went to save his number in her contacts. He laughed, showing Clarke the phone, where there was already one name in there. Bellamy. Clarke rolled her eyes.

"I think he has a crush on you," Raven laughed. Clarke's stomach flipped over. She still hadn't told Raven or Monty she'd had sex with Bellamy, and they didn't know about the huge crush she had on him. Her old phone rang again, and Finn's name popped up.

"It's Finn," she said to Raven.

"Answer it," Raven urged her.

"Finn?" Clarke answered.

"Hey, Clarke. I've got this benefit thing tonight, and I can't find my speech, do you think you could come in to the office and help me? And possibly accompany me to the benefit?" he asked.

"Uh, hold on," Clarke replied. She covered the mouth piece with her hand. "He wants me to go to a benefit with him tonight," she said to Raven.

"You should go," Raven nodded. Clarke eyed her warily but nodded.

"Sure, Finn. I'll be right there," she agreed.

Half an hour later she was all dressed up and going through the files on Finn's computer to find his speech.

"I'm really sorry about the wedding," she told him.

"It's not your fault I was about to marry someone I barely knew," Finn scoffed.

"Raven's a good person," Clarke assured him. Finn nodded but he didn't seem convinced.

"Thanks for doing this," he said gratefully. "That's what I love about you. I can just call you up, and you never say no," he chuckled. Clarke's spine stiffened.

"What?" she looked up from the computer.

"Well, I just meant… did I say something wrong?" Finn cocked his head and looked at her like a confused puppy, and strangely, instead of being endeared, it made Clarke feel kind of sick to her stomach.

"Um, Finn," she said. "I quit."

"Wait, what?" Finn asked, taken aback. "You quit? What do you mean?"

"I was only supposed to be here a year or two. But then I had to be here everyday to see you, 'cause I was so madly in love with you," she laughed sadly. Finn stared at her with wide eyes. "Yeah," she shook her head. "But you'll be fine, Finn. You will. You'll get someone else in this position who-," she was cut off by Finn's lips on hers. There should have been fireworks and a singing choir, because that was what she'd been dreaming of for years now. But instead she was just wondering when it would be over. Finn pulled away.

"I'm sorry," he said.

"No, it's fine. I always wanted to know what that would feel like," Clarke smiled.

"And?" Finn prompted.

"Nothing," Clarke laughed, strangely relieved. "I didn't feel a thing. You?"

"Well… if I'm being honest… me either," Finn sighed.

"That's not what it's supposed to feel like," Clarke said and Finn nodded in agreement. Clarke smiled at Finn sadly, then started when music started playing from her bag. Bennie and the Jets, buh buh buh Bennie and the Jets.

"What is that?" Finn asked. Clarke pulled her phone out of her bag, her new phone, which showed that Monty was calling her. She wasn't thinking about Monty at all however.

"I've got to go," she said to Finn, rejecting the call from Monty as she ran from the building. Once on the street she dialled the only other number in her phone. He picked up after one ring.

"This is Bellamy Blake," he answered.

"Bellamy? It's Clarke," Clarke said nervously. Bellamy didn't say anything. "Can I see you?"

"Yeah, of course," Bellamy said after another pause. "Come over." He gave her his address and Clarke hailed a taxi, and was at his place in ten minutes.

"Come in," Bellamy said, opening the door for her. He seemed unsure what to do with himself, and Clarke thought this was probably the first time she'd seen him looking so insecure. She thought she should probably put him out of his misery.

"I just want to say that you were right about me. About all of it," Clarke told him. "I just didn't want to hear it. Especially not from you," she gulped. "You know, I was waiting my whole life for the right guy to come along," Clarke continued. She looked at Bellamy but his expression was unreadable. "And then I met you and, frankly, you were nothing like I imagined. You're cynical, and cranky, and… impossible," she shook her head with a laugh and she thought she saw the corners of Bellamy's mouth turn up slightly. "But I think fighting with you is the best thing that's ever happened to me," Clarke admitted. "And I think there's a very good chance," she took a deep breath, "that I'm falling in love with you."

Clarke looked up at him uncertainly, anxiously waiting for a reply.

"Thank god for that," Bellamy breathed, pulling her in to kiss her, and this time she saw the fireworks and heard the choir but she was too busy kissing him to even notice.

---

One Year Later

Clarke watched proudly as Octavia and Lincoln had their first dance as a married couple. It wasn't the first wedding she'd organised, but it was the first one she'd been paid to do, and she already had one of Octavia's bridesmaids asking for her services.

"It was beautiful," Bellamy whispered into her ear. "You really outdid yourself." Clarke grinned and kissed him softly. The MC called for the guests to join the happy couple on the dance floor and Clarke took Bellamy's hand and dragged him out. Clarke rested her head on his shoulder as they swayed to the lilting ballad.

"Clarke," Bellamy said softly into her ear.

"Mmm?" Clarke responded.

"Marry me," he said huskily. Clarke's eyes flew open and she looked at him searchingly to see if he was serious.

"What?"

"I want you to marry me," he said again. Clarke smiled and was about to say yes, but she stopped herself.

"You have to do it properly," she told him. Bellamy laughed and shook his head, but he let her go and fell to one knee. The people around them stopped dancing to stare.

"Clarke Griffin," Bellamy said loudly. "I love you," he declared. "Will you marry me?"

"Yes," Clarke laughed, pulling him to his feet and kissing him. "Yes."