A/N: Smutty oneshot with feelings. Enjoy.

Disclaimer: Don't own 'em. Just playing with 'em.

"Hey there Captain," Liv spoke in a low, sensual voice as she walked further into Ed Tucker's apartment. "I let myself in with that handy key you gave me. Hope you don't mind."

He looked up at her, peering over his reading glasses as he remained seated at his desk, papers strewn about in a collectedly chaotic manner. Her sexy smirk was turning him on, but he knew he had to remain focused or he'd regret it later. She'd been evading his probing questions all day; it was clear that something was wrong and she didn't want to talk about it. Normally he would accept her silence and move on, but whatever fear she was holding on to at the moment wasn't going to just disappear. He had to push. He just hoped that he wouldn't push so hard that she'd walk away.

"I'm glad you're here Liv." His voice was gravelly as he pushed his chair away from the desk slightly, inviting her over to him. Ed watched as she walked towards him, stopping once she found that space between his thighs. She leaned against the desk, her hands on his upper legs as he tried to regain some semblance of control. His body was already betraying his intentions. The simple touch of her hands on him was enough to send shivers down him, an erection already beginning to form beneath his pants. Olivia moved her hands to his belt as she leaned in to kiss him.

Their mouths met and she immediately parted his lips with her own, seeking entrance as her tongue scraped against his teasingly. As much as she loved his glasses, she took the time to remove them, setting them somewhere off to the side on the desk behind her before they really got going. The moment she moved to unclasp his belt he grabbed her wrists, stilling her. He pulled back and sighed at the look of question in her eyes, his forehead resting against hers as they collectively tried to catch their breath.

"Ed what's wrong?" she whispered, unsure she wanted to know his reason for stopping.

He took a deep breath trying to regain a sense of composure before diving in. "What's going on Olivia? Something is bothering you and I don't know what it is so you have to tell me."

"Nothing's bothering m—" she stopped mid-sentence, feeling rather than seeing Ed's incredulous gaze.

"Liv, whatever it is, no matter what it is, you can tell me. We need to talk about these things." His voice was soft but steady, sure that those words needed to be said. He gave her a minute to gather her thoughts before she began talking, but her silence broke his heart just a little. "Come here." He opened his arms and she, much to his relief, immediately took solace in his embrace. Now both sitting on the chair, Ed holding onto her as if she'd disappear at any second, Liv nuzzled her head into the space between his shoulder and neck. He inhaled the scent of her shampoo trying to memorize everything about her, every tiny detail.

Ed felt her breath hitch against him, and while hoping and praying that he wasn't pushing too hard, he continued. "Talk to me baby."

"I'm so scared," she whispered into his shoulder so quietly he had to strain to understand her words.

"What are you afraid of? Tell me," he pushed gently.

"Things like this don't happen to me, Ed. I can't feel this way about you because any time I come close, something happens and…I'm alone again. Noah is the one good thing that's happened that hasn't been ripped away. I just… god this scares me."

Her words ripped at his heart, clawing and gnawing away at him. Ed pulled back and tilted her chin up with his hand, caressing her cheek with his thumb. "Olivia you've been running and trying to escape your inner demons for so long that happiness like this? It's almost foreign to you. It's only natural that you feel like this will be taken away too. But it won't as long as we both work for what we want. It's okay to stop running from this." He moved closer to her the longer he spoke, and by the end he was whispering the words against her lips. His eyes travelled down to her mouth before meeting her gaze, breathing in her air. He wanted to kiss her so badly, but Ed knew she needed to grasp his words first. Olivia needed to understand every intentional syllable and thought he'd just uttered. So instead he remained still, taking in the vision before him.

"I've been running for so long. I'm tired of it," she exhaled softly.

Moving so his mouth was next to her ear, he murmured, "All you have to do is stop." Her heart was pounding hard, thumping in her chest so loudly that she almost didn't comprehend his words. His voice in her ear, his breath tickling her skin, the words that he conveyed so simple yet so powerful wracked her body.

"I don't know how," she uttered weakly. Olivia looked down, watching him remove the arm from around her waist and lightly place it on the back of her arm, just above her elbow. The touch was subtle, reassuring, and inexplicably erotic. She'd never before considered the possibility of such a simple gesture turning her on so much, but the combination of his hand on her skin, his assurances, and the love radiating so deeply from his eyes made her want to drown in him.

His lips pressed against her ear this time, "I'll help you, Liv. We can do this together." She let out the breath that she'd been holding, half-sigh, half-moaning as Ed nipped at the skin just behind her earlobe.

This time it was Olivia that moved. She stood, backing up so she was once again leaning against his desk. It was then that she took a moment to take in Ed's appearance. The rise and fall of his chest was in sync with hers, neither quite panting but both breathing heavy with desire. A blue button down shirt brought out the stormy lust in his eyes, the top unbuttoned and the black tie loosened around his neck. Lightly pulling on the tie, she made sure he followed her lead and watched as he stood up, his body flush against hers.

Her lips skimmed his jaw, feeling the small stubble from the day, before moving to meet his in a searing kiss. Ed moaned into her mouth, his tongue dancing against hers, both parties pouring all their energy and love into it. Her arms reached around his waist and up his back, pulling him even closer as her hand tugged at his muscular shoulder blades. His own hands were partially tangled in the curly updo that had fallen as the night went on, partially on the back of her head giving himself the illusion that he was controlling the kiss. All conscious thought left Olivia when he playfully bit at her neck, probably leaving a visible mark of his desire. He knew he would pay for that later, but it was worth it. The world would know she was taken. She was his. And he was just as eagerly hers.

"Will you let me help you stop running?" he asked in a breathless whisper.

Knowing she needed Ed to realize the gravity of her confession, she pulled her head back and looked up at him. "Ed, I trust you…I trust this. I'm done running."

He kissed her lightly this time, taking his time to pry her mouth open. The tip of his tongue teased her own, fully knowing she was becoming desperate for more contact.

The moment their lips parted, Ed growled, "Turn around." Deliriously needing more of him, she obeyed. Her hands found the desk as his snaked around her waist. She waited for a brief moment in anticipation of his touch, but when he made no attempt to further contact she opened her mouth in objection. Just as she began to call his name he exhaled against her back, "I love you Liv." His lips left a trail of scorching kisses against the bare skin of her back where the dress dipped into a low V. The front of it gave a hint of cleavage that was sexy as hell, but the back of the dress was cut lower, exposing a teasing amount of flesh that begged to be kissed.

Olivia shuddered at his touch. "I love you too Ed… so… oh god, so much," she whimpered when his hands dropped from her waist to the front of her thighs. His short nails dug into her flesh lightly as he pushed his growing hardness into her backside. Liv's responding moans drove him wild, his hands slowly, torturously slowly, drifting up her body until they rested on her breasts. Her moans only increased in volume as he tweaked her nipples though the dress and her thin bra underneath. She was already squirming against him and he hadn't even gotten started yet.

He kissed from the middle of her back up to her neck now, nipping at her sensitive skin along the way as he began lowering the zipper. Once it was completely unzipped he stepped back, affording Liv the space to let the material fall off her shoulders on the floor, the fabric pooling around her ankles. His gaze followed the garment to the ground and landed on the sexy heels she was wearing before he took in the whole sensual image before him. He watched her turn, clad only in a thin black bra and thong that showcased her plump ass.

Olivia stepped forward, once again grabbing onto Ed's tie, kissing him passionately as she untied the knot keeping it on his body. She reached for his belt, working as fast as possible to rid him of clothing. Ed busied himself with his shirt's buttons, cursing himself for still wearing it in the first place. He wanted his clothes gone now. He wanted to be buried inside her.

When he had finally finished unbuttoning his shirt, Liv was dragging his pants and boxers off of him. He ripped his t-shirt over his head, now standing before her completely exposed.

A small shriek emanated from her lips as he grabbed her thighs and tugged her up onto the desk, pushing all his paperwork aside, not caring that half of it was now scattered across the floor, disorganized. She threw her head back, one hand digging into the desk and the other gripping the back of Ed's neck as he kissed that magical spot behind her ear once again.

"I'm going to make you come so hard," he promised, drunk on the atmosphere of Olivia Benson. The sound of their heavy breaths, the smell of her arousal, the feel of her skin against his, the taste of her lips, the vision of Liv in lace and high heels, her legs wrapping around his hips pulling him close, it was all too much. Unable to control himself any longer, Ed pried her ankles from around his body and sank to his knees, licking the wet lace between her thighs.

"Ed please," she whimpered. Listening to her pleas, he deliberately took his time dragging the scrap of lace down her long, tanned legs. Her heels were next, tossed somewhere across the room without a care. Before they had time to worry about exposing her shapely breasts, Ed dove in, licking her core with purpose. His hands trailed lightly up and down the back of her thighs as she writhed beneath him, holding onto the desk for dear life. He traced her clit a few times before sucking on it, bringing her to the brink of an orgasm only to back off. This time he lapped at her lightly, gently before penetrating her with his tongue.

"Oh fuck that feels so… good… oh god yes." She squirmed on the desk, both wanting him to keep going and wanting him to stop so she could feel all of him inside her. Ed was savoring her taste, ravishing her completely, knowing that as much as he wanted to feel her warmth around him, he wanted, no, he needed to make her feel how much he loved her.

Her thighs started gripping his head unconsciously and he moved so his hands grasped at the inside of her thighs, pushing them farther apart as her moans grew louder. Ed pulled back and almost came from the view of Liv spread open for him, her eyes shut, her chest rising and falling, nipples hardened against the lace.

Ed stopped his ministrations momentarily as he rose and reached behind her, unclasping the last remaining piece of offending fabric. On his way back down he paused at her breasts, rolling one nipple between his fingers and sucking on the other before switching. The other hand found her dripping center and her body hummed beneath him. His fingers teased her entrance, slick with her arousal. He pushed in, one then two, and he took full advantage of her gasp at the intrusion. He kissed her deeply, expecting her surrender to his touch. Instead, she fought against his mouth, taking as much control back as she could, fighting to suppress the thrill of tasting herself on him.

Liv was surprised when Ed tore his lips away, sinking to his knees once again, kneeling before her and thrusting his fingers into her harder now. The unmatched sensation of his tongue on her clit as he shifted the angle, now curling his fingers up into her, caused her to cry out in pleasure.

"Yes right there. Please…more." He would never deny her desires and couldn't manage to suppress a grin as he flicked the bud with his tongue, moving his fingers in and out at a faster pace. Her cries became unintelligible and delirious and he felt her walls beginning to quiver around his hand.

"Let go, Liv." His breath blew against her clit before he wrapped his lips around it, once again maneuvering his tongue against it, though this time just a little faster, a little harder. His tongue's not-so-subtle caresses became her undoing.

"Ohmygod Ed," she screamed, her cries echoing off the walls of his study. She continued to spasm around his fingers before he pulled them out, seeing her wince at the emptiness. He licked her clean and she was spent. The moment he stood, she slumped forward against him, her forehead against his warm, muscular chest, catching her breath.

"Holy shit," she laughed. "You… you are very good at that." Olivia didn't need to look at him to know he was wearing a smirk as a badge of manly honor in that moment. He was hard, more than ready to really show her what an orgasm should feel like as he buried himself inside her, but he gave her a few minutes to regain some strength. She would, after all, need it before he gave her a new idea of satisfied exhaustion.


"Baby, as much as I want to take you up against this desk sometime, I don't want to do that tonight. I want to make love to you in my bed, where you belong," Ed said softly, kissing the side of her head, smelling the sweet mixture of her shampoo and hairspray.

Olivia nodded and wrapped her arms around him as he lifted her up off the desk, carrying her down the hallway to his bedroom. He deposited her on the bed but the moment he laid beside her, she rolled on top of him. She started kissing his lips before moving to his jaw, his neck, down his chest at a tantalizingly slow pace. He didn't offer any resistance as she continued her journey to his hipbones, nipping lightly and soothing the bites with her tongue. He was hard and throbbing, aching for her, aching for release, but he had taken his time exploring her so he'd let her explore him as well.

She straddled his thighs as her hand grazed the tip of his length. Ed sucked in a breath, wanting, more than anything, for her continued touch. Feeling dizzy with power, Liv pumped him a few times before moving up his body. Her body was situated exactly where he wanted her to be, though on top of his erection, moving slightly, just subtly enough to make him want to come right then. Unable to resist any longer, he hitched a leg around her and flipped them over, moving his lips against hers while spreading her legs apart with his own.

Her arms were wrapped around his sculpted back; her thighs spread wide awaiting his entrance. He pushed himself up with one hand as the other pushed the hair that had fallen out of place off of her face. His light blue orbs pierced her soul; he saw beyond her fears, her insecurities, he loved her for who she was, the entirety of who she was.

Just before pushing into her, Ed stopped, licking his lips as he tried to find the right words. "I love you so much Liv. Saying those words will never be enough." She closed her eyes as his forehead drifted to hers.

"I love you too."

Without further warning, he pushed up into her, hearing her gasp at the fullness. He gave her a second to adjust and pulled out before pushing back into her, further this time. It only took a few more thrusts for her warmth to encompass him completely, both drowning in each other, finally.

She'd come to his apartment tonight after a night out with Melinda and Casey to have a good fuck. She knew she loved him, but she had every intention of just satisfying her sexual urges in a rough, animalistic way. Now she had no idea how she could have ever wanted anything other than this. And she wanted more. This was beyond even her best expectations. Their connection was strong; it was deeper than just bodies responding to one another. It was love in the fiercest, most passionate, demanding, and understanding way. Ed was inside her and they were riding out the waves of uncertainty, the waves of doubt. She was done running, done trying to understand why this was happening. They were both giving in, diving in fully and whole-heartedly into the unknown with the knowledge that they both wanted this to work.

His thrusts were hard and demanding though slow and sensual. Her hands clenched the sheets beside them and he moved to grab them, raising them above her head, his fingers threading through hers. Their eyes met again and his mouth was just centimeters from her own. They were breathing in the same air, breathing in each other. Moans and gasps escaped them as the slapping sound of skin on skin permeated throughout the room. Her legs clenched around Ed's waist as their bodies were grinding together.

He tilts his head towards hers and tastes the wine that she had at dinner. She's intoxicating in the best way, and he never wants to be sober again. She moves slightly, nipping at his jaw while he continues to pound into her, drawing out strings of cursing and crying out to the heavens, begging for more of him. Their bodies are stuck together, slick with sweat and need, in this place where time no longer exists. The only thing that remains is the two of them in this bed, in this moment that could last forever.

Liv pushes back on Ed a little and he gets the hint, slowly rising off of her. She maneuvers them around until he's sitting up against the headboard and she straddles him. Her nipples are hard and at the perfect height for him to tease them with his tongue. She's still sensitive from earlier, and can't help but cry out as his hips push up against her own movements. Ed bites lightly at her breasts, sucking and leaving marks that are already turning a deep shade of red. Olivia is riding him, her hips slamming down onto his erection.

She's greedy.

She wants him.

She needs him.

She takes him deeper and harder, rising and falling faster than before, panting.

"Mygod Liv. So good," he mutters against her ear. The loose strands of her hair are slick and sticking to her face, her neck. She wraps her legs around Ed's back the moment he takes over, suddenly finding energy to thrust up into her so hard that it takes her breath away. The slight pain is nothing compared to the overwhelming sense of pleasure and pressing hunger for everything he has to offer. Ed is giving her everything he has, everything he is. Her burgeoning cries for more are music to his ears. He is doing this to her. Her legs are quivering and her walls are beginning to clench around him.

"I'm so close," she rasps. She doesn't have to say anything because he knows. He can feel her getting closer and closer to sweet release and he's right there with her. Holding on with everything in him to give her another orgasm, he pushes into her one last time, harder than ever before. They don't just tumble over the edge, they crash against each other, unable to contain themselves. Together, they fall apart, clawing, biting, and screaming in release.

She's relentless in this moment, and he's coming so hard that she's milking him completely dry with her own orgasm. He can faintly taste the blood he's drawn from her shoulder, and he can feel the scrapes that she left when she was shaking so violently from her orgasm that she attempted to hold onto his muscular back.

Though they were both too exhausted to recollect her rolling off of him, she was settling against him as they slid down the bed and drifted off to sleep immediately after whispering sweet nothings to each other.


He woke feeling a cold chill against his body where Olivia was laying. Instead of feeling her in his arms, he felt empty space. Pillows and blankets were strewn about in her wake. Damnit. I really thought she'd be here, he thought.

Ed's head hit the pillow as he internally groaned in frustration, snapping out of it when he heard the sink running. Olivia's naked form crept back into the darkened room, slipping in bed next to him once again as he sighed in relief. She turned to face him, bringing her hand up to caress his stubbly cheek as she peered into his eyes.

"I'm done running. I love you," she whispered, sealing her promise with a kiss. She pulled back but Ed was faster, crashing his lips against hers once again.

"You are incredible, Olivia Benson. I love you. Thank you for trusting me," his gravelly, sleepy voice replied.

Neither one was naïve enough to believe that there would be no challenges. They knew that they'd argue, life would throw them curve balls, and choosing to stay instead of running wouldn't always be easy or come naturally, but they also had faith in each other. Trust wasn't an easy thing to come by for either; both were damaged from their pasts, bruised from other people. But they were confident that they could do this, that they would do this. They were choosing each other. And they were done running.


So... review?