Prologue
It was dark. Hermione saw red. She knew it was time. She quietly got out of the bed and walked down the stairs to the common room. Suddenly, Hermione heard a noise. She jumped, and whirled around to see who was there. She sighed in relief. It was only Crookshanks, her ginger colored cat. She knelt down slowly, so that the floorboards wouldn't creak. Petting her cat, she whispered in Crookshank's tall silky ear. "You are such a sweet kitty. Now Crookshanks, you behave for whoever gets to keep you when I'm gone. Mummy has to go now, Crooksy. Goodbye." She gently kissed Crookshanks on her wet nose, and stood up again. As Hermione slipped out of the common room, a tear slipped out of her eye. She was going to miss her cat.
She knew her plan was ingenious, and that it couldn't falter. She stepped out into the cool night air. Smiling, she reached into her robe pocket and pulled out the rope. Gingerly, in the light of the moon, she worked doggedly on tying the correct knot. Hermione had always been good at knots; she was good at everything she could read about.
It was cold, and her hands were stiff. Hermione thought once again about what she was about to do. It was okay, she told herself. It would make everything better. No more worrying, no more pot, no more living up to who everyone thought she was. She blew softly on her fingertips to revive the feeling in them, and go back to work at tying the knot. She couldn't pretend to be who she was not anymore. She just couldn't. It was exhausting, and as she had realized recently, it wasn't really her.
On that first day at Hogwarts, she acted like a geek. She thought maybe it would give her an advantage in her grades if she wasn't popular. She wouldn't have to spend any valuable time when she could be learning with friends, if she didn't have any friends to spend it with. But some how, the two boys she had been hoping to avoid, the famous Harry Potter, and the troublesome Ron, who couldn't take a step without getting yelled at for it ended up in her house, and befriended her. Ever since then, the three of them had been going on adventures, and sneaking around at night.
It wasn't that she didn't enjoy these excursions, they were exciting and exhilarating! But they were bringing down her grades, and IT wouldn't allow that. IT haunted her constantly, at home, and at school. IT was her number one fear, and she no longer could even sleep peacefully. For Hermione, sleep used to be her only escape. When that escape became null, she turned to pot. But pot stopped working for her either, when one day she saw Draco Malfoy, her worst enemy using pot. So she had turned to her last option. Or, what she had thought was her last option; suicide.
Hermione finished the main knot, and started on tying the rope in a slip knot around the particularly strong looking branch that she had picked out earlier for completing the task. This was the first time she had used this knot, because she had never needed it before. She had found it in a book in the library by someone named Erik Destler. At the time, she had wondered why anyone would ever want to end their life in such a way. The man who wrote the book talked as if he was doing people favors by putting directions of how to do such a thing out in the world. She hadn't understood it then, but she understood now as she prepared to complete the task. My friends and family will be better off without me, she thought. Harry can love any girl he wants, without worrying about spending time with his ugly, puffy haired, second best friend. That was what she kept telling herself that night. She was doing this for Harry. As she slipped the rope over her head and around her neck, she thought once again. This is for you Harry. And she tightened the rope.