I'm Still Here
by: StupefiedNarutard
NOTES: Ahahahahah, I loveeee Avatar! But it's missing a little something... ;D
Summary: He took a gasping breath, his pupils dialating rapidly, heart pouding in his chest. His mouth felt like cotton, his stomach was completely empty. What had happened? The last thing he remembered was getting ready to depart for Pandora... [Sullcest] [YAOI] [M]
Prologue: Unconsciousness andAwakening...
Some say you can hear what others are saying when you're unconscious or close to death.
Well, I say they're right. I heard everything my little brother said to me in his fear that I would never again wake. He poured his heart out to me at the bedside of a hospital, the smell of rubbing alcohol and plastic probably filling his nose, burning the moment into his memories. His hand was trembling as he held onto mine, trying to explain to me just how important I was to him, how he couldn't face the world alone, not like this. But Jake was a proud young man then... I don't see how he wouldn't face the world with a cold stare and a cocky grin. He was just like that.
Jake had always been the baby, though he was the stronger of us two. Dad was proud of him, like Mom was proud of me for having a PhD. I also felt so much more mature than him and it wasn't untrue. He was just a child in a young man's body, always playing around, being a smartass and following his heart blindly. But that's what made him him and I never wanted him to change... And though he still acted as much, there were parts of him that did change after he lost his legs.
When he lost his legs, he became very hardened to the world and it's inhabitants, though he still had that natural goodness in him that was hard to possess on such a place as Earth. I shouldn't have left him alone to drown in his sorrows, but I... The Avatar program was something I'd spent my whole life on, just like Jake had basically wanted to be a soldier his whole life. Well, I didn't spend my life specifically on the Avatar program, but I knew that I was in science for something special and this was it. I loved my Avatar program like it was my child. I should have given that attention to Jake.
I had never heard Jake sounding so pathetic as he did on the day that I was in that hospital bed... He sounded like he would die himself, trembling as he was. Jake had always had those silly emotions in him, most likely from Mother. His conscience was too big for his own good. And of course he had to tell me the craziest thing while in that condition, when he thought I wouldn't hear him, the last time I would hear his voice.
"I love you..," he had proclaimed, voice firm, but cracking a bit. "And not like I should... I love you like... like... Mom loves Dad. And that's a lot, by the way," he laughed at himself here, but sobered up quick enough to finish what he wanted to say. "I need you here with me... I know you love me too."
And I did... I do. I love my little brother like I should love some beautiful scientist woman and I'm fucking crazy. Living on Earth can mess you up like that. It's the fumes... they get to you.
But the little shit said it and now I sit here, in hiding, on a cryo ship, ready to tuck myself in for a 5 year ride to Pandora where I know he'll be because he departed only months ago. I've a clone of my Avatar in hiding on Pandora as well, courtesy of Dr. Max Patel, my long time friend and college buddy. He was shocked to see me not dead.
It's a weird thing, coming back from the dead. You feel like you've been submerged under icewater and nobody could hear you scream or hear you beating on the ice to get out. I could hear things... Then again, there's parts where my consciousness fades in and out and I don't remember what happened in those times. The most prominent times I remember was when Jake was there, in the room, talking to me, watching me... As long as he was there, our twin connection kept us together, though we were apart.
I know this is gonna be a major bitch... I've been "dead" for quite some time and my training is a bit fuzzy, though I remember most of it. I hope Jake doesn't do anything stupid in the months that I'll be absent... It's just a couple of months... Of course, it is Jake. Little Jake Sully.
He'll love being an Avatar, especially since his Avatar will have functioning legs. He won't feel like a cripple for the first time in a long time. Of course, people will probably bug him about his legs when he gets there. Such is the behavior of the miscreant monkeys they intended to send with us. If only it was just the scientists going to Pandora... we wouldn't need all that militia if we weren't tearing down their forests and lands. But those bastards want the money. They'll just rip apart Pandora as they did Earth. And how beautiful Earth used to be... if the pictures were anything to go by.
The lush green lands, the sparkling waters... the air didn't look mucky 24/7. We didn't need oxygen masks cause we actually had oxygen. How I wish we could have lived in those days... Jake and I could have been two free men, not chained down to jobs for a source of freedom.
The ship feels cool under my bare feet as I make my way to make sure my Avatar is hooked in properly. This one looks different than the first. This one is more me. Max did an amazing job... He's still a tiny thing, this Avatar... but he'll make a good host. He's a bit taller than the last, with more hair and a longer face, like mine. This little creation is amazing... that's one thing Earth didn't have back then: advanced science, my passion.
Everything looks secure and I guess I should alert Max that I'm about to put myself into a 5 year sleeping coma, as if I hadn't been in one of those in a while.
"Max," I intercom him, "I'm getting in."
It takes him a moment to respond, but there's his fast talking voice saying, "Ready when you are."
Saying a quick prayer to a non-existent God, I pull myself into my sleeping box and tell him I'm ready. Pressing the button, I can smell the faint smell of a chemical that could knock out a killer whale. And it's getting da..r..k...