Authors Note: This is dedicated to Plenoptic. She requested a fanfic centred around what Optimus Prime would do for Elita One on Valentines Day. I'm very late in getting it all finished (sorry sweetie!) but I hope the wait is worth it. Enjoy!
And yes, this is set in the 2007 Movieverse, post-movie. All characters owned by Hasbro. I just put them in girly lingerie and call them names...
Earth, Tranquillity...
"What are you giving Elita for Valentine's Day, Optimus?"
"Huh?" Optimus lifted his head slightly from resting back on his folded arms to run an optic over the human by his side.
Optimus Prime and Sam Witwicky were at the Lookout, each man/mech lying on their backs, quietly studying the rose glow of the dying sun sinking below the horizon. Sam was on his back, hands propping up his head so he could see. The huge robot next to him was lying in exactly the same position. It was an odd sight to see such eerie similarity between different species.
"Valentine's Day? Elita?" Sam asked again.
The Autobot Leader still looked at him with a completely clueless expression. His optic covers slowly blinked.
"Oh c'mon, don't tell me you don't have romance on your planet!" Sam huffed, kicking a bit of dirt in Prime's direction with the toe of one sneaker-clad foot.
"We... do appreciate the concept of displaying our love for our mates, Sam," Optimus responded. His swift World Wide Web search was bombarding him with all sorts of information on 'Valentine's Day' rituals. "We just do not have a designated day to do so." The huge mech paused, quickly sifting through the data he had amassed in his CPU. "And I don't think Elita would see the value in chocolates and champagne."
Sam barked a laugh, sitting up and holding a hand to his mouth as he snickered, "Oh boy, heh, yes, I do see your point." The boy scratched at his belly absently, ruffling his t-shirt. "Well, there are other things you could do. Presuming you want to do them?"
Optimus crossed his ankles over; painted metal squeaking and vibrating. "Alright." He felt very comfortable talking with the human boy about non-important, innocuous subjects.
"Okay. So. Valentine's Day is on Thursday. We've got two days to plan."
Optimus Prime's optics widened. "Plan? Is this a battle?"
"It can be. If you don't do the right thing by your girl, you'll get the biggest war on your hands ever." Sam grinned.
"I see..." Optimus felt very un-nerved. "You will assist me with planning, then?"
"But of course! Oui, oui! The mademoiselle will be taken care of, no?" Sam chattered excitedly. This would be his first Valentine's Day with an actual GIRL. He already had several things in mind for his new girlfriend (aided along by the chunk of change the Government had awarded him for 'assisting' the Autobots with kicking Decepticon aft and saving the day).
"Thank you, Sam."
Later that evening, at the Autobot Base...
"Valentine's Day?" Sunstreaker spun around in his revolving chair, whirling around and around with such intensity that Bumblebee braced himself to catch the warrior when the chair broke. "Man, if only we had more femmes here for us to play with, hey 'Sides?"
"Yeah," the red Lambo twin nodded, sagging back in his own chair with disarrayed limbs, "Sounds cool. Flowers and crap. Give the present, reap the reward. Very smooth."
"I wouldn't spend too much on the present though. Sometimes femmes reject the bait, know what I mean?" Sunstreaker drawled. The fearsome yellow mech was in a very mellow mood, his words rambling on.
"Yup. Know it." Sideswipe nodded wisely, scratching lightly at the armor on his shoulder.
Bumblebee looked back and forth between the older warriors, standing behind their chairs with his optic ridges raised up. There was only one Transformer femme currently on Earth. Elita One. Optimus Prime's sparkmate. Was Optimus going to participate in this Valentine's Day ritual with his female? What would he do? Could they watch?
"BUMBLEBEE!"
The Camaro jumped, whirling around. The big black mass with shrewd glowing blue optics that was Ironhide stomped into the rec room. "Your turn for base detail, runt."
Bumblebee nodded, practically zipping out of the room and saluting as he went.
Ironhide stood over the Lambo twins, towering his height over their sitting mass. "What did you say about femmes?"
"Valentine's Day. A human love ritual." Sunstreaker eyed off the Weapons Specialist.
"Give them a present on the designated day, and they lie down for you saying they're all yours." Sideswipe added enthusiastically. "Supposedly."
Ironhide grunted. "Don't need presents. Just ask. They'll lie down and spread their plates fast enough." The mech trudged out of the room. Conversation over.
Sideswipe blinked at his brother. "Do you think he...?"
"Ironhide?" Sunstreaker crinkled up his noseplates. "Nah."
"Mmmm." Sideswipe didn't look so convinced. He'd heard stories from both femmes AND mech's about Ironhide's exploits. The black grumpy monster who never polished his armor, had a wonky optic, shattered audio receptor couplings from countless cannon recoils, and enough scars to need a body replacement? Couldn't be true... could it?
Sideswipe was jolted out of his musing by Optimus Prime striding into the room. Their Leader paused, seemingly startled at finding the Twins hanging about. "Oh. Excuse me." He turned to leave. He'd thought they would've been out driving. Obsessed with testing our their new Earth modes, the two Lamborghini's had been a regular feature on the human highways nearest the base.
"Optimus! Uh, sir!" Sideswipe called out, propping his legs and leaping out of his chair. He was still getting used to saying 'SIR' again. He and Sunstreaker had been in space without a Commanding officer present for eons. Not that they liked referring to other mech's as 'sir' in any case.
Prime paused. "Yes, Sideswipe?"
"Will you be participating in Valentine's Day?"
The tall powerful mech gave Sideswipe a searching look. He knew all about the Twin's reputations for chasing anything with female programming. Of the few femme's in his army, Optimus knew that between them, the Twins had been with every single one of them. Except for Elita, so of course they would be interested in the human displays of affection.
"I was hoping to, yes. It would be a nice surprise for Elita, I believe, and we should be attempting to blend in with this planet's customs. Why?"
Sideswipe sent Sunstreaker a devious glance. "We'd like to help."
Optimus Prime paused, shifting his not-inconsiderable weight from one foot to another. The Twins were the best at organising and pulling off non-war-involving stunts. Perhaps they could help him for once. Didn't Sam say giving roses; an Earth plant; was one of the preferred gifts? They were much too small to give, tiny, compared to their robot sizes. Sunstreaker was a painter – could he sculpt as well?
"Alright... Thank you," he said slowly, with a faint smile, and headed over to one of the rec room tables.
Sideswipe grinned like a maniac-bot, nudging his twin. Sunstreaker smirked, following his Leader's masculine aft to the table.
"What do you have in mind?" Sideswipe grinned at Optimus across the table, as they all sat down.
"I believe it is traditional according to Earth custom to give one's partner flowers, chocolates and champagne."
Sunstreaker nodded, "Right. So, for us, that would equate to... uh, come on CPU." He tapped his forehead. Optimus stared at him. "There. Energon goodies, high-grade, and I don't know about the flower bit. We don't have' em back home."
"Flowers? A plant?" Sideswipe screwed up his faceplates. "How does giving a plant symbolise love? And does it have to be the whole plant?"
Sunstreaker sneaked up a hand behind his brother's head – and whacked him.
"OWW! Sunny!"
"It's just the flower you give, pit brain. Not the rest of it. I'm sorry Optimus, he doesn't appreciate the finer points of love," Sunstreaker drawled to his Commander, gesturing.
Sideswipe whined, feeling his head for dents.
Optimus tried to keep the smile off his face. It was nice to be talking casually with the Twins, instead of having a serious chat about their misbehaviour in the base or wild battlefield techniques, and how to improve it. They were intelligent 'bots, and very talented in many ways.
"Sunstreaker, how good are you at sculpting things out of metal?" Prime asked curiously. "I have an idea..."
The next morning...
Optimus Prime sat in his office, checking the state of his personal expenses account (a very small part of the American money given to them by the US Government as part thanks for staving off the Decepticons from killing everyone on Earth). The Autobots needed some way of buying the supplies they needed, without any of the donated money they would've been very badly off.
He looked again at the web page on his desktop monitor – 'Interflora America'. These people provided flowers. Pay over the internet and they delivered, the people never needed to know it was a giant alien robot doing the ordering. And the price for four dozen red roses was... ouch. That much? No wonder the human males grumbled about love being expensive. That was fully ten percent of his account.
A knock on his open door. "Morning, Sir."
Optimus looked up. Sunstreaker was standing there with the metal object in his hand that he had asked for.
"Hello Sunstreaker. Ah, I see you managed to accomplish what I was hoping for."
"Yes," the golden Lamborghini walked in and carefully laid the precious object on Prime's desk. "Side's helped me paint it, too. Looks good, huh?"
"Yes," Prime nodded, looking at it appreciatively. It was beautiful. "Very much. You have great talent, Sunstreaker. Thank you. I owe you one."
Sunstreaker nodded, pleased, and left; no smart remarks, glaring, or bargaining for something in exchange. Optimus reached out a hand and picked up the object, cradling it gently so as not to break it. It twinkled and glittered under the overhead lights above his desk.
Perfect.
Now to get the rest of his plan underway. He mentally apologised to his expense account, and hit the 'BUY' button on the website, then sent an email to Sam. Everything was coming together.
Valentine's Day morning...
Optimus Prime snuck around his quarters in almost complete darkness. Elita One was still laid out on their recharge berth, not yet awake to stare at him tip-toeing around like a madbot. He'd already over-ridden the light controls so Elita couldn't suddenly switch them on and demand to know what on Cybertron he was doing.
The red roses he had ordered via the World Wide Web had arrived the day before - a courier arriving at the door of the Autobots 'normal' seeming warehouse, and a holo-human Ironhide gruffly signing for them. A bewildered Bumblebee helped his Leader to pack away the vibrant bunches of plants in a storage cupboard with pans of water under their stems to keep them fresh (Prime was very diligent about reading instructions).
Prime finished his sneaking around and as quietly as possible, climbed back on to the recharge berth next to his bonded, slipped one arm around her waist, and waited for her to wake up.
Lying on her side, Elita's head moved. "Mmm." She rubbed at her noseplates. Something smelled. "...Optimus?" she whispered.
"Yes?" He rested his chin on her shoulder, peering down at her.
"What's that smell? It's sort of nice, but I can't think what it is..."
"Oh. That." The red and blue mech grinned. "Tell you in a minute. Are you ready to get up now?" he questioned.
"Okay," Elita shrugged vaguely, her optics lighting up. "Why is it so dark?"
Optimus shooshed her, "Never mind that, just put your hands over your optics, please. No peeking."
"What?!"
"Please Elita?"
"What are you up to?" the femme demanded, looking at him over her shoulder. Their optics glowed at each other in the darkness.
The Autobot Commander nuzzled the back of her neck with his noseplates, "I have a surprise for you. You'll like it, I promise. Please, cover up your optics?"
Elita looked horribly confused. "Alright, alright." She placed her hands over her optics. Optimus was being silly. She could have just turned her optics off.
She squeaked when she felt him slide his arms underneath her to lift her up. He took a few steps away from the recharge berth and halted, still holding her in his arms.
"You can look now," his deep voice rumbled in her audio.
Elita lowered her hands at the same time as the room lights came on. "...Primus..." she gasped in awe. The room was filled with red roses. They were on the desk, fanned out at the end of their berth, scattered on the floor in patterns... everywhere. She looked up at her sparkmate, her arms tight around his neck, "For me?" she asked. Her CPU searched the World Wide Web for a match to the plants on the floor. Roses! That's what the smell was! They were given as a gift of love on this planet.
Optimus nodded, and bent his head down to nuzzle his face against hers. "Yes, for you... Happy Valentine's Day, Elita," he murmured. His mouthplates brushed over hers in a soft kiss.
Elita pulled back slightly, still close, "Happy Valentine's Day? What is that?"
"An Earth custom. A day when lovers profess their love for each other and present symbols of their affection." He smiled down at her. "I love you. The roses are my gift to you."
She reached up and cradled a hand on his cheek, "Thank you, Optimus. I love you too."
Optimus Prime went all shy, ducking his head.
A rush of desire filled Elita's chassis. Her hands griped at his shoulders, fingers wriggling inside the gaps in his armor, teasing and stroking, her head rubbing on the ridges of his chest. Optimus took a moment to dim his optics and enjoy it. His gift wasn't finished yet. His engine rumbled with pleasure.
"No, no, femme-" Prime gasped, shifting her in his arms to make her stop touching him. "Wait! There's more!"
Elita paused, freezing her fingers under the armor of his chest. She pouted. "More?"
Optimus chuckled, "There's always more for you."
The Femme Commander grinned, settling back into his arms. "Okay! Lead on. This is fun, I like this planet." She kicked her feet happily, "I'll let you keep carrying me, if you like."
Smirking, Optimus strode to the door, unlocked it, and began heading to the rec room.
At the other end of the hallway, Sam Witwicky was poking his head out the door, waiting for them. Seeing them, he squeaked and pulled his head back in, "They're coming!" he hissed, "Bumblebee, get Mojo ready!"
"Roger!" Bumblebee knelt on the floor, holding an excited Mojo still between his hands.
Reaching the rec room, Optimus lowered his femme to the floor gently, letting her slide down his heated body. "You need to be on your feet for this," he murmured softly, brushing one finger down her noseplates affectionately.
"Hi guys!" Sam waved up at them.
"Sam," Optimus nodded, hoping Sam's part of the plan would go off without a hitch. He wasn't sure they should be trusting Mojo to do his trick...
"Hi Sam!" Elita grinned down at the boy, while waving a hand at Bumblebee, "Did you get something for Valentines Day too?"
"Yeah," Sam hung his head, blushing, hands in his jean pockets, "I did. But, um, tell ya later? We have something for you, from the big guy, of course."
"Big guy?" Elita's optic ridges flew up, and she pointed a finger behind her, "THIS big guy? The cute one? I think I know him!"
Optimus shook his head, smiling. "I told you there was something more. Now hush, femme."
One cue, Bumblebee opened up his hands, releasing an excited Mojo. The dog had learnt his new trick well. He wanted to show-off. Mojo was pulling a small cart he had used a few times at dog shows in obedience classes. He hadn't been asked to pull it in a very long time, but he hadn't forgotten how.
Elita One stared. What on Cybertron was THAT? A tiny animal was pulling a cart of some sort, heading in her direction. There was something shiny in the cart...
"Go on boy, thata boy, good Mojo, keep going, don't you stop now," Sam was quietly encouraging his dog.
Mojo walked with assured little steps like he was approaching the Queen, carefully making his journey with dignity. He stopped in front of Elita, waiting for her to empty the cart, like he'd been taught.
Optimus crouched down on one knee, lifting up a metallic object nestled in white tissue paper from Mojo's carefully towed cart and thanking the dog for a job well done. Elita's mouth opened in amazement as she saw what it was. In her beloved's hand was a beautifully crafted rose. Made entirely of finely wrought metal with exquisite detail, it had been painted to resemble the real colors of a genuine rose – and the rosehead itself was the exact same shade as Elita's rose colored armor. It was much larger than an Earth rose, more in proportion to the Autobots size.
The Autobot Commander stood back up and turned to face her, the rose in one hand, holding it by it's green painted stem. He held it out to her, his optics sparkling, "Elita, would you be my Valentine?"
Elita held her hands to her mouth, optics shimmering, "Oh Optimus... of course I will! Yes!" she accepted the rose with one hand, staring at it. Holding it in one trembling hand, she stood up on tiptoes and tugged his head down for a searing kiss, leaning herself against his chest so there was no space left between them.
"Awww, guys, get a room!" Sam clapped, hooting. Bumblebee nodded and wolf whistled.
"A room?! More like a jail cell! You've got room in the brig, don't ya Prowlie?!" Sunstreaker called out.
"Only because you are not in it, for once," Prowl scoffed at the yellow mech.
Optimus and Elita stopped the kiss and looked up. The rest of the base was crowding into the rec room, all agog at their Commanders making out in public. Ironhide had the biggest smirk ever. Jazz was bouncing from foot to foot, loving the display. Even Ratchet was showing a faint smile of approval. Sam had retrieved his dog and was busy stuffing him with beef dog treats for a being such a good boy.
Prime looked down at his girl, "I think we had better take this back to our quarters, yes?" he murmured. So saying, he picked her up again.
"We'll be back... later. Troops, dismissed," Optimus said over his shoulder as they left. Then added, "For the day."
A cheer of approval hit their audio's down the hall.
Lying back in his arms again, Elita looked up at him, holding her 'rose' in both hands. "Where did you get this?"
"Sunstreaker made it. He's very good."
The femme cocked her head with a sly smile, "I'll have to thank him... Mmm, tomorrow." She stroked a hand down Optimus' chestplates, "I'm busy today."
"As am I," Prime said with a devilish grin, entering their quarters, "As am I."