A/N: This was written before the disaster that was Breaking Dawn and as of right now, I've decided not to change anything. This just came to me in bits and pieces while I was in the shower. I really identify with Leah and I just think she's a fascinating character. I'm really sorry this took so long, life's just been too busy! I'm trying really hard to get on more now. Brownie points if you can pick out the hidden quote! Enjoy!
Disclaimer: Nothing is mine except the plot!
"It's not fair," Leah thought as she settled down in her wolf from. Oh, she knew the others talked about her. About how she weighed the pack down. That she was a weakness. They told her to get over it. To move on. But none of them understood. How could they ever understand what it felt like to have your heart ripped out of your chest and torn to bits while you stood by and did nothing. Really, what could she have done? He was so perfect and she was just…Leah.
She should have known this would have happened sooner or later. After all, Sam was just perfect. He was the person every girl wanted to go out with and every guy wanted to be. He was admired and respected by everyone who met him. And such a gentlemen. She could remember the first time she had really seen him. Oh, they had basically grown up together but they were always in their own separate groups. And then that fateful day… She closed her eyes remembering it.
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"Really Leah, I don't think you have anything…" Emily trailed off in mid-sentence.
"Any what? Hello? Earth to Emily?" Leah waved a hand in front of her best friend and cousin's face.
"Oh my God, he's looking this way. Quick, act normal!" Emily whispered in a low voice. For all of Emily's advice, she certainly wasn't acting normal. She twirled her beautiful long hair anxiously and looked down. They were grabbing lunch at Joey's, a local pizza shop where they usually hung out. Leah looked around in confusion.
"Who are you even talking about? There's no one here except…oh" She stopped, doing a double take. "Is that Sam? Sam Uley? Wow, he's changed." This wasn't the gawky preteen she remembered. He had filled out over the summer. And man, had he filled out nicely. Emily was right though. He was looking at them. Catching his eye, she smiled at him. Seeing her smile, he got up and started walking across the pizza parlor towards the two girls.
"Leah, what did you do?" Emily moaned out, almost as if in pain. It was obvious that Emily had lost higher brain function the moment she had seen the new and improved version of Sam Uley. "He's coming over here!"
He strode over to them with confidence practically oozing from his pores. "Imagine seeing you two here." Turning to Emily he said, "Good day, Miss Young." She practically swooned hearing the sound of his voice. Then as if seeing her for the first time, Sam turned to Leah with a sparkle in his eye. "Oh Miss Clearwater, you look more ravishing every time I see you. How could I have missed this fine jewel? Oh, the beauty that is you! My, how have I been able to live without seeing such a sight! My life has been deprived!" Capturing her hand, he raised it to his lips and kissed it.
Speaking as old-fashionedly as he had Leah responded. "Why, Mr. Uley you must be flattering me. I accept your complements with great pleasure." She fluttered her eyes, exaggerating the movement so much that everyone had to choke back their laughter. "And might I say that you are looking very well indeed."
"My dear Leah, finest jewel in all the land, would you do me the greatest honor of going to dinner with me sometime?" He looked at her intensely, suddenly serious.
"My dear Mr. Uley, I would love to" Leah responded with barely concealed happiness.
"Until then." Sam kissed her hand once more and then swept out of the restaurant.
Leah and Emily looked at each in astonishment. "Did that really just happen? Are you going out on a date with Sam Uley?" Now that Sam had left, it seemed that Emily had regained higher brain functions.
"Yeah. I think I am." Leah said quietly, barely believing herself.
That was the beginning.
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Leah had been surprised at the time. After all, it was usually Emily all the guys went for. Beautiful, smart, older Emily. By no means was Leah ugly…she just wasn't Emily. Emily the Great. It had never really bothered her before. They were best friends and cousins. Leah knew that one day she would find someone and have her own happily ever after. Until then she had been content to wait in the shadows of Emily's brilliance.
Now, she had nothing. No perfect boyfriend, no friends, no life, her family was falling apart. She just wished it were back before everything. Before the vampires. She hated them. The cold ones.
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"Sam, what's wrong? You've been acting funny for the past couple of days. Did I do something?" Even after over a year of dating, Leah was still extremely self-conscious and questioning herself. They were lying out in the woods, in a secret valley that Leah had found as a kid. It was their special place free from the torments of the outside world. Lying together under the sun, it felt like nothing could ever tear the two apart.
"No, Leah its not you. I don't know what's wrong with me. For the last couple days, I've just felt awful. I must be coming down with something. It's not something you did." Turning on his side to look at her, he brought her hand to his lips just the way he had done that day at Joey's. "Never think that. You are the sun in my skies, the brightest star at night. Leah, I love you. Never think that you could be the cause of my pain. Never." Wrinkling his nose he added, "And I would kiss you absolutely senseless but I don't want you to catch whatever I have. Don't worry I'll make up for it later." He smiled down at her before getting to his feet. "Come on, I'll take you home. I don't think I'll be the best person to hang out with you tonight."
He shifted for the first time that night.
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Sometimes she was angry with the vampires. After all, they had ruined her life. Her father was dead, her whole life torn apart. Her boyfriend was in love with her cousin, her best friend. Sometimes she wished she could go back in time and change things. Then everything would be ok. Her mother wouldn't cry at night, mourning the loss of her husband and daughter. She could have her family again.
And she could have Sam. Wonderful, perfect Sam. Her Sam. He would never be the same now. She could barely bear to admit that to herself. Sam had changed. He wasn't who he used to be. She wouldn't admit to herself that this wasn't the man she had planned on marrying. That man was forever dead, a casualty of the age old war between the vampires and werewolves.
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"Sam, what is wrong with you? You've been so distant! What aren't you telling me?" Leah cried out, visibly distraught. Sam hadn't really talked to her in a week. When they did talk, it always turned into a screaming match like this. "You can tell me anything, you know that!"
"Leah, I can't tell you this! I just can't! Why can't you accept that!" Sam practically roared at her. Leah took a step back from him. She had never seen him this angry. Sam didn't get angry. But looking at him now, with anger etched fiercely in his face and his hands balled into fists at his side, Leah was scared. Seeing her fear, Sam growled in frustration and whirled away. He hadn't meant to scare her. Just like he hadn't taken her out here to fight with her. He took a couple deep breaths. 'Calm down, Sam. Just calm down. Don't lose control. Not here. Not now. Not with her.' Now calm, turned back to face Leah. He was shocked to see her sitting under a tree, crying. Leah never cried. She was the strongest girl he knew. He went and knelt by her.
"Sam, I just don't understand why you can't tell me." She got out between the tears. "Do you not want to be with me anymore? Is this why you're doing this? Trying to make me hate you so I don't feel terrible when you break it off? Is that it Sam? Because it won't work." She broke down truly now, sobbing earnestly.
Taking her head in his heads, he made her look at him. "Leah, no. Never think that. It's just I'm bound not to tell anyone, even you. I would tell you if I could truly. And never think that I want you to hate me. I love you. Its just…do you remember the old legends?"
"What? What do the legends have to do with anything?" Leah asked with a hint of confusion in her voice.
"Everything, Leah, everything. Tell me the ones you remember." Sam urged her insistently.
"Ok, well there's ones about firebird, the cold ones and their enemies the werewolves…" She trailed off seeing Sam nod. "Is that what you're trying to tell me? That you're a werewolf? Sam, try to think of a more convincing lie." She spun around, ready to stalk off but Sam whirled her back around. "Let go of me! You tell me useless lies and then you grab me like you own me. Well, you know what Sam? You don't!" Leah practically screamed the last sentence, causing birds to alight from the surrounding trees in surprise.
"Leah, please. Just wait here for a minute." Sam pleaded with her. Seeing her stop, he strode behind a tree and quickly stripped. Once completely naked, he shifted and walked out in his wolf form. Leah just stared.
"Sam, is that…you?" She asked faintly before sinking to her knees. He padded over to her and nuzzled her neck. She stroked him absentmindedly. "I guess you weren't lying to me. I, I have to go." She got up from where she was kneeling and ran off, pausing only to look back at him from the edge of the clearing. He knew better than to follow her. She needed time to adjust. Hell, he hadn't really adjusted yet. She would be ok with this. Nothing, not even this could tear them apart.
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It wasn't supposed to be like this. She wasn't supposed to be the bridesmaid in the wedding she was helping to plan. She was supposed to be the bride, not Emily. She had to put on a happy face for everyone as the said such rude things as "Oh but wasn't Sam you're boyfriend, Leah dear? It's so nice that you and Emily are such good friends that you'll even share men!" And then they'd twitter with laughter and be on their way. They didn't realize how much pain those comments caused her. How much pain it caused her to be around Emily, her former best friend, her once completely gorgeous cousin. She couldn't stand to see other people happy. And no one understood.
"Leah, what do you think: white roses or lilies?" Emily again, being absolutely disgustingly happy. Leah pasted a fake smile on her face for the millionth time that day.
"Go with the lilies. They're beautiful." Seeing Emily smile and whirl around in her happiness, Leah had to look away.
She would have to endure. Like she always did.
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After that day in the woods, Leah thought they could endure anything. After all, what could tear them apart now? She had thought that finding out Sam was a supernatural creature would be the worst that it could get. I mean, it couldn't get any worse right? Oh how wrong she had been.
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"So are you excited about Emily's graduation party? It's going to be awesome! I can't believe you two actually managed to graduate!" Leah squealed and twisted away as Sam tried to grab her. They were on the way to Emily's house, where her parents were hosting a huge blowout bash for all the graduating LaPush kids. Leah hadn't seen Emily in nearly a week, not since Sam had shone her his wolf form. 'I can't wait to talk to her. We have so much to talk about.' Leah thought to herself.
They rounded the corner to Emily's street and they could already hear the music booming from three blocks away. Leah looked at Sam and seeing him wince, asked, "Are you ok?"
He rubbed his ear. "Yea, I'll be fine. Just the music is so…loud." He cringed again as a particularly loud song came on. Come on, let's go. I'll be fine." Seeing Leah's worried face, he kissed her before reassuring her. "Trust me. Everything will be ok." Grabbing her hand, they walked down the street and entered Emily's house.
Suddenly, what felt like a small tornado hit Leah. "LEAH! You're here! Finally!" Emily was visibly ecstatic. She hugged Leah again before starting to drag her through the crowd of people by the door.
"Sam, save me!" Leah cried jokingly. But looking back she saw him just standing there looking absolutely stricken. He just stood there, looking almost terrified and captivated at the same time. She called his name again, thinking that he may not of heard her. "Sam? Hello? Earth to Sam?"
He snapped out of it and looked at her as if seeing her for the first time. "I-I have to go" He muttered, leaning down to give her a kiss on the cheek before turning and almost running for the door.
It was the beginning of the end.
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Looking back, it's so easy to see now. How could she have been so blind? Sam never left a party early, even if he was sick or in pain. You had to literally shove him out the door when the party was over because he wanted to stay and help clean up. Really, it was just how much of a gentleman he was. So she should've have known something was wrong when he bolted without even talking to the host. But she had stayed, thinking that she would talk to him later and find out what was wrong. How wrong she had been…
She was haunted by it now. Sometimes she blamed herself. If only she had left with him, this wouldn't have happened. If only she hadn't made him come to the party. Her mind tricked her into thinking that if she had stayed with him, they would still be a couple. She would be happy. It would be her wedding approaching. Deep down though she knew, even if she didn't want to admit it to herself, that the imprint would have happened anyway. Even if he had tried to fight it, he would be miserable. And even if it killed her, Leah couldn't stand to see him miserable. She would have lost him anyway because she would have let him go. Just to see him happy…
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Leah rolled over in her bed trying to burrow into her comforter, not understanding why she was awake. She hadn't gotten home from Emily's party till midnight and had immediately crashed. Hearing the phone ring, she realized what had woken her up. Sticking a hand out, she groped for the phone. She answered it groggily, "Hello?"
"Leah, I need to talk to you." Sam said urgently through the receiver.
"Sam? Wha.." She bit off a yawn. She blearily looked at her bedside clock. "It's 2:30 in the morning. What's so important that it can't wait 6 more hours? Or preferably 10…"
"Leah, please. Meet me in the clearing as soon as you can." Sam hung up the phone, leaving Leah confused. For a moment, she seriously considered ignoring him and going back to sleep but he had sounded urgent. Groaning, she crawled out of bed and quickly dressed before stealthily creeping out of the house and making her way to the clearing. Sam was already there facing the opposite direction, dressed completely in black.
Hearing the crunch of the dry leaves beneath her footsteps, he turned. Leah was shocked to see how somber his face looked. Together with his outfit, he looked like he belonged at a funeral.
"Leah…" Sam started but then paused, looking uncomfortable. "I don't know how to say this…I-I've never felt like this. It's maddening and wild and wrong…" He paused again, this time running his fingers through his hair. Just seeing Leah standing there, waiting patiently for him to go on. She had come out here at 2:30 in the morning just because he asked her. Leah was a good person; she shouldn't have to go through this. 'I wish I didn't have to do this.' He thought to himself. 'It's not right! And yet…it's as if this is the best thing I've done my entire life. Oh, Emily…'
"Sam, you can tell me. I'm your girlfriend. I'll love you no matter what." She made her way over to him and reached out to touch his cheek. He recoiled faster than a lightning strike.
"No, please…don't touch me. It just makes what I have to do harder." Seeing Leah's confused expression, he smiled sadly at her. "Leah, something happened yesterday at the party. I didn't understand it. I thought I could outrun these feelings that were boiling up inside of me. But I couldn't. I tried and tried for hours. Finally, I went to the elders. They knew what it was. They'd been 'expecting it for some time now'." He shook his head and laughed bitterly. "Leah, I don't know if you remember, but there's another part of the werewolf legends. Every werewolf instantly knows on sight who their perfect match is. And…" He tried to grab her hands but she was backing away from him with a look of horror painted across her face, mouthing the same word over and over. No. "I swear Leah, I thought it was you." She turned and ran, disappearing instantly in the black of early morning.
'It's for the best. I have to keep on telling myself that.' Sam inwardly scoffed at the idea. 'Now if only I can get myself to believe it.'
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Leah couldn't remember how long she cried. She didn't eat. She couldn't sleep, try as she might. Everywhere in the house, she was haunted by images of her and Sam. The kitchen where she had baked him a birthday cake. The sofa where they first kissed. The bed where they had first made love. It was difficult to be near the things but it was agony to be away from them. Her family watched as she slowly wasted away. Her mother tiptoed around her, trying to make her leave the house and see her friends. Her father's frown became deeper. Her brother stayed out of her way, afraid of her temper. And outside of their little world, life went on.
She never wondered who Sam's chosen mate was. She told herself she didn't want to know. But her parents knew. She could by the way that they looked at her, almost with a sadness that matched her own. Conversations stopped when she entered a room and then continued when she left. She didn't care. A part, a most essential part, of Leah had died. She was a shell, unfeeling and untouchable.
Until the phone call. One phone call that blew her world to smithereens.
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"Leah, the phone's for you!" Her mother yelled up the stairs. Leah was in her room, moping as usual.
"Tell them to go away. I don't want to talk to anyone." Leah lifted her head off of her pillow to yell back before flopping down on the bed again. She heard her mother coming up the stairs anyway. "Mom, I really don't want to talk to anyone! Why can't you understand that?"
Her mother thrust the phone at her anyway. "It's Rebecca Black. Oh well, I guess it's not Black anymore since she married that surfer. She's calling you from Hawaii. At least talk to her." Forcing the phone into Leah's unwilling fingers, she turned and walked out of the room.
Leah sighed before lifting the phone to her ear. "Hello?" she asked warily.
"Leah! It's so good to talk to you! It's been forever, hasn't it?" As she babbled on Leah tuned out, making noncommittal grunts when necessary. She didn't understand why Rebecca was calling her. Rebecca had always been closer to Emily and the other girls on the reservation. Leah started when she heard Rebecca calling her name. "Leah? Hello? Are you still there? Did you hear what I just said?"
"What? Sorry I just spaced out for a minute. What did you say?"
"I said I just heard the news about the wedding! Isn't it so exciting? I mean, what with you and Sam dating for so long. Who would have thought he would be marrying Emily?" Leah stiffened as she finally understood what the big secret was. 'No. Not Emily. Anyone but her.' She thought. Rebecca prattled on, unaware that Leah had dropped the phone and curled into a ball from pain. The pain of a broken heart. "I mean, I can imagine how you must feel right now. Rachel once dated one of my exes and we're twins! I'm sure you're happy for them though. I mean who wouldn't be? They're just so…Leah are you still there? Leah!" Leah was beyond comprehension now though. She rolled on to the floor, a new pain coming over her body. Her emotions swirled around her. Anger, jealousy, sadness, betrayal. They couldn't all exist inside their host. Leah reared up, letting out an almost inhuman roar and suddenly exploded out of her body. She landed on all fours. Confused, she glanced over to her floor length mirror and saw a wolf gazing back at her. Terrified, she backed up and seeing the wolf back up, turned and looked for the nearest escape. She was running on instinct now, though she didn't know it. Seeing her window, she crashed through it before disappearing into the woods.
On the floor, she left the phone with Rebecca still on the line. "Hello? Hello…"
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Leah didn't know how long she ran or where she was going. She just needed to get away. Away from that house away from everything. Her entire family had lied to her. 'How could they have done this? Why? Why, Emily? Why not someone else? Anyone else!' She ran on, not caring that she was panting for breath. She howled at the moon as she ran.
'Why me?' She thought bitterly. 'Why does everything happen to me? Just when I had my whole life figured out, this happens. How could she betray me? She's supposed to be my best friend. How could she do this…no, how could he do this? After everything…" she broke off now, openly sobbing in her mind.
Leah again howled at the moon. She didn't care who heard her. 'Let them hear.' She thought bitterly. 'And then let them try to stop me.' She pounded on, almost disappointed when no one emerged from the trees. Leah didn't really find it as strange as she thought she should that she was running as a wolf. She supposed it was shock. She had made herself be as numb as possible. She knew it would hit her later. She didn't care. She didn't care about anything now.
Paying more attention now that her strength was flagging, Leah now noticed something she had since been unaware of. Thoughts. Thoughts that were definitely not her own.
'Damn, I'm tired…'
'Yo, I wonder what Maria's doing…'
'Stupid guard duty. Why can't Sam…'
'Man, Seth too? Changing younger all the time…'
Stopping completely for the first time since she catapulted out her bedroom window, Leah hunkered down and put her paws over her ears, trying to block out the sound. 'I'm going crazy. I've finally cracked. I should be locked up and drugged. Just stop it, please. Stop the voices.' She whimpered and then lifted her head when all the voices stopped completely.
'Leah?!'
'Leah?!'
'Leah?!'
'Leah?!'
'Oh shit man! Shit shit shit!'
'Sam's gonna kill us…'
'This is bad. This is very, very bad.'
Leah set off running again, trying to elude the voices. Anything to block them out. She had recognized their voices. Jacob, Embry, Paul, and Jared. All members of the pack. And if she could hear them, they could hear her. She had thought her life could get no worse. Oh, how wrong she had been.
'Hey, where's she going? Damnit! This isn't supposed to happen. Paul, go with Embry. Find Sam. He needs to know about this. Someone will need to stay with Seth too…'
Leah let the voices fade to the back of her mind. They wanted to find Sam, huh? Well she'd give them a run for their money. She had felt their shock. Their anger. But most of all she had felt their panic. They were scared of what she would do. They were deliberately trying to think of other things but she could still pick up on the undercurrents of their thoughts. They didn't know what to do. There had never been a female werewolf. Not that they knew of. Not that anyone knew of. None of the old stories mentioned anything about females. 'Well I guess there's a first time for everything.' Leah thought bitterly.
There was one other thing Leah had picked up on from their thoughts. Resentment. They didn't want her there. 'Newsflash boys, I don't want to be in this position either.' Leah thoughtangrily 'I don't want to be thrust in the minds of a bunch of hormonal teenage boys who view me as a handicap or a hanger-on. Especially not my ex-boyfriend who I love and intended to marry who dumped me for my best friend and COUSIN!' She ended her little tirade shouting into their minds. She could feel them wince. Good let them feel her pain. They didn't know how it felt to have their whole life ripped away from them in an instant. She would make them understand.
Unbeknownst to Leah, she passed over the boundary line separating wolf and vampire territory. Unknowing of what she had done, Leah ran on.
Leah didn't know how long she had been running before she burst into a clearing and seeing its sole inhabitant skidded to a halt. Edward looked up from where he was relaxing in the clearing.
"Well now this is a surprise. Do you have a death wish, wolf?"
'At the moment, yes I bloody do. So why don't you just put me out of my misery, you stupid bloodsucker?' Leah thought furiously, knowing that he wouldn't be able to hear her. Her hackles raised unbidden. Her instincts told her to attack this monster but she held herself back.
"You are a feisty one aren't you?" Edward laughed at the look that appeared on the wolf's face. If a wolf could look confused, this one certainly did. He dipped into the wolf's mind again. Withdrawing in surprise, he said "A female? And Sam's ex-lover…Well that certainly shakes things up." Fishing a tiny silver cell phone out of his pocket, he quickly dialed Sam's number. "Uley, get down here and collect one of your wolves." Quickly giving him directions and hanging up before Sam could ask where he had gotten his number, Edward returned the cell phone to his pocket and returned to his resting position.
Leah stared at him incredulously. 'Why isn't he killing me?'
"I can hear your thoughts, wolf. How else would I have known who you are? I won't kill you because it's not what you really want. You don't want to die. You want everything to be the way it was. I have a sister like you. Rose wants more than anything to be human. To be normal. And just like her, you're not. But you, you can choose to be normal. Consider yourself lucky. Some people have no such choice." He turned away from her and each said nothing more until Sam emerged from the forest.
"Control your pups, Uley." Saying nothing else, Edward melted back into the forest.
Sighing, Sam looked at Leah. "Phase back, Leah. We need to talk." She silently growled at him. "Leah, just do it." He ordered her. Growling at him once more, Leah phased back to her human self slowly until she stood in front of him naked as the day she was born. Sam looked away.
"What, Sam? It's not like it isn't anything you haven't seen before." Leah retorted, glaring at him. Sam shrugged out of his light jacket and held it out to her. "Fine. If you insist." She walked over and ripped the jacket from his hand before donning it. "Happy now?"
"Leah, please. Don't make this harder on me than it already is." Sam pleaded with her.
She whirled around and jabbed a finger in his face. "Harder for you? For you? You have everything! Nothing is going wrong in your life! When were you going to tell me it was Emily? Of all people! Was I just supposed to never find out? Too bad, Sam, the secret's out! What are you gonna do about it?"
"You think I wanted this to happen? You don't think this has changed my life too?" Sam fired back at her.
"Yea, it's changed your life for the better! I have no life now. You were my life. Without you, I have nothing!" Leah was crying earnestly now.
"Leah, please. Just stop. I'll explain later. Just…go home." Sam pleaded with her in a pained voice.
"I have no home anymore! You were my home Sam." Leah looked at him with sad eyes. Sam just looked back at her with the same expression on his face. He withdrew into the woods, leaving her crying in the clearing.
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Leah had never known how to deal with hard things. She always withdrew and let Emily defend her. But Emily couldn't protect her now. Standing beside her father's grave, knowing it was partially her fault, she didn't know what to do. Seth stood beside her, pale and withdrawn. He hadn't been able to string more than two words together since he learned what had caused their father's heart attack. And for once, Leah couldn't be strong for her baby brother. She was tormented by the same affliction.
Leah knew Sam had come. She could feel him standing several feet back with the rest of the tribe. He expected them to phase once they were done. Help share the pain he had said. As if she would ever share her pain with him.
She sensed rather than saw Sam approach the two of them. "The pack is going back around to the clearing. We'll see you both there?" Sam asked. While Seth nodded, Leah shook her head.
"I'm staying with my mother." Leah replied coldly. "She needs someone right now." Seth sensing a fight edged away from both of them.
"Leah, don't distance yourself like this. Let me help you." Sam grasped her arm gently by the elbow. "Someone else can stay with your mom."
Leah ripped her arm from his. "I don't need any of your kind of help, Sam. I think I've had enough of that, don't you think? Why don't you just go cuddle up with Emily. You're good at that. This time, try not to rip into the other side of her face, ok?" Sam backed away from her, a wounded expression on his face. She hated herself for causing him pain.
It was better this way.
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'Bridal showers.' Leah thought with disgust. 'Whoever thought of them should be taken out and hung.' She was at Emily's house, waiting for the party to be over. She hadn't wanted to come but her mother had forced her. Leah didn't want to do anything that would cause her mother any more pain. So she had come. It was worse than anything she had ever imagined. Streamers and balloons strewn everywhere. Happy friends just flitting around Emily. Gifts waited in a pile on top of the coffee table. It seemed everyone had forgotten that just a year ago it had been Leah with Sam. 'At least I'm not the maid of honor. Then I would have had to plan this catastrophe.' Leah thought bitterly. A year ago, she would have loved to be Emily's maid of honor. 'How things change.'
Standing up, Emily's maid of honor Rachel Black, Jacob's older sister, called everyone to order. "Ok, everyone! Time for what we've all been waiting for- presents!" This prompted delighted squeals from the rest of the guests, all of them gushing and pushing their present toward Emily, wanting her to open theirs first. Leah sank back into her chair and sighed. 'It's ok. You can leave after this. Everything is going to be fine.' She told herself. Taking a deep breath to calm her nerves, she painted what she hoped was a sincere looking smile on her face.
It seemed that Rachel had won the battle of the presents. Emily held the brightly wrapped box in her lap. Lifting the lid she gasped and quickly closed it. "Rachel, you didn't!" Emily cried out in shock.
"Oh, yes I did. Come on, show everyone your lovely new outfit." Rachel smirked as Emily blushed dark red and slowly unveiled the lingerie Rachel had gotten her. It was a tiny little thing. All red satin and dark lace. "Rachel, I could never wear this in front of Sam! I'd be mortified! You know I've never done anything like that before!" Gently, Emily returned the lingerie to its box.
Leah snorted in disbelief. The party as one turned to look at her. "You think Sam's a virgin, Em? Please. The only blushing virgin in that bedroom will be you." Leah looked at them all in disdain. Everyone looked uncomfortable now. "I would know though wouldn't I?"
"Um Leah, can I talk to you for a minute in the kitchen?" Emily rose, clearly expecting Leah to follow her. Leah sighed and got up to follow her. No one looked at her. "What?" she snapped. "You were all thinking the same thing!" Angrily she strode out to the kitchen where Emily was waiting for her.
"Why do you always do this? Why can't you just be happy for us Leah? Every opportunity you get, you bring this up! You and Sam are over! I lov…" Leah cut her off with a slap. "Don't even talk to me about love Emily. You don't know what love really is until you've lost it." Leah snapped.
"Have you no soul Leah?" Emily wailed, not caring that the rest of the party was blatantly eavesdropping. "Why, why do you do this? I understand the pain you're in. I'm sorry this all had happened to you. Especially now with your dad…But I'm still you're best friend…"
"No, Emily. You were my best friend. You understand nothing. And I did have a soul. You- you shattered it when you betrayed me." Drawing up close to her, Leah whispered in her ear. "And on your wedding night, when you're panting under him, just think that I was there first. He loved me first. Try to please him. If you can." Leah drew back, feeling sickly satisfied at the look of repulsion on Emily's face. Her mission complete, Leah left, leaving a distraught Emily standing in the kitchen.
……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………
The day after the wedding. Leah had been dreading this day. The day Sam would return to them in his wolf form from his one night off. Oh, she knew he would try to do the right thing and not think about Emily. But he was a newlywed and he had barely been able to contain his affection for Emily before they were married. Leah started pulling up her defensive wall. Snide remarks, cutting comments, things that no one else wanted to think about. They protected her from the pain if only for a short while. A new presence filtered into her mind. Ah, Sam had phased. Time for battle.
Though they were miles apart, Leah could clearly hear his thoughts. They sickened her.
'Gorgeous. Even more gorgeous than normal. God, I wish I would never leave her side. We could stay in bed all day and make love…'
'Moving on already, Sam? Gee, I thought you would remember me more clearly. Maybe I should remind you. Late summer night. My parents were out. You know, back when I had two parents. Seth was over at a friend's house.' As Leah described the scene, she threw the images from her head into everyone's minds. 'There were candlelight and roses. Both of our first times…I remember how much you liked the thing I did with me tongue. Tell me, did Emily do it too? I probably told her all about it, you know. After all, best friends do share everything.'
'Stop it Leah…"Sam warned her but she ploughed on.
'Don't want me to talk about it Sam? Don't want everyone to know? Fine. I won't think about that. Let's think about Embry. Hmm, I wonder who Embry's daddy is? Is it your dad Sam? Or Quil's or Jacob's? I wonder who would have cheated on their wife and fathered a son? I mean really, what piece of scum would do something like that? What do you think, Sam? Does Embry look more like you or Quil? I don't think he's related to Jacob but really I see a striking resemblance between the two of you.' Leah just kept going. She had to have some way to let out all of her anger and frustration.
'Leah…'Sam was near the end of his patience.
'Don't like that subject either, Sam? Well how about Bella. You know, Jacob's little girlfriend. Oops, she's not your girlfriend anymore now is she. She chose that bloodsucking leech over you. Doesn't that just burn? After the wedding she'll have him bite her you know. And then she'll become just another one of them. Your enemy. A thing you were created to kill. But oh, does poor little Jacob still love Bella? Poor, poor Jacob.' She couldn't stop herself now. She felt the others pulling away in disgust. Even her own brother pulled away from her actions. One by one, they phased back until she was blissfully alone.
Leah knew it was wrong to do this. To torture them. She didn't care. This was how she lived now.