I've had this idea in my head for a while and I need to get it out. I know I'm in the middle of another story right now, but I decided I need to explain the ring shots in "Travelers" but I don't want it to be Diana. I hate Diana. MSR all the way!!!

Disclaimer: I don't own Mulder or Scully; I don't own much of anything. Just student loans...

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Mulder walks into his apartment and drops his bag inside the door. How could I not have gotten any evidence! It was killing those people with fear. I know I'm right.

He looks over and sees a light blinking on his answering machine. That's weird; Scully's the only one who leaves messages. The Gunman wouldn't let their voices be taped by anyone but themselves. "Fox, it's Becca. I know it's been a long time but I need to talk to you. It's important. You know I wouldn't call you if it wasn't."

Becca? It's been 9 years...

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The Next Morning

Scully walks into the basement office and sees Mulder sitting in his chair staring at his desk. He hadn't shaved and was still wearing the suit he wore on the flight home. He's not throwing pencils or even eating sunflower seeds. What the hell? Is he that upset about the case? He never gets this upset. Something's up...

"Mulder?"

He looks up, startled. "Oh, hey Scully."

"Mulder, what's wrong?"

Mulder leans back in his chair and scrubs his face with his hands. "Scully... there's something I never told you about myself. Something big."

Mulder tells me everything. He even stopped hiding those movies that aren't his from me. What could he have not told me? "That okay, Mulder. You don't have to tell me everything... But you can tell me anything you want to, okay?"

"Well, I kinda have to tell you this, Scully. I think my past is coming back to bite me in the ass and you should at least be warned."

What the hell is he talking about? He's really scaring me. "Mulder, you can tell me. It's okay. Just stop freaking me out and tell me already!"

"I was married. And my ex-wife called me last night and told me she needs to talk to me."

Married!? Why wouldn't he tell me that? There's nothing wrong with that. There's no reason to be ashamed. "Why didn't you tell me before, Mulder? Not that I'm mad... I'm just wondering."

"I don't know... The time just never seemed right. I always wanted to but for some reason I could never get the words out. I didn't want to have to tell you what I did."

"What did you do?"

"I found the X-Files while we were together and I started ignoring her. She became my work widow. She just wanted to have a life, a husband, a family, but I wouldn't leave the office. There was one time when I didn't go home for over a week. I never even thought about her. I never called her and never answered the phone. I drove her to it." Mulder's voice broke and tears started running down his cheeks.

Mulder used to be here more than he is now? Does he still love her? He wouldn't cry over her if he didn't love her... He can't love me then. But, I can't focus on my feelings now, I need to help Mulder.

"Scully, why could she talk to want to talk to me? I hurt her, I drove her away? She never would have done that otherwise. She wasn't like that..."

"What did she do, Mulder?"

"At first, she tried to pull me away. She would literally drag me out of the office, but I never stayed away long. It was like gravity. I couldn't just leave. I would try, but I would always be pulled back. Eventually, she pulled away from me. She started drinking. She still functioned during the day. She went to work and always did a good job. It didn't interfere with anything before 5pm."

Why is he acting like her killed her mom or something? I know he did a bad thing, but he didn't pour the alcohol down her throat.

"She didn't stop at alcohol. It worked for a while, but eventually it didn't deaden the pain enough. She went to a party one night and some people were using drugs, it don't know what it was, but she started using a lot. Since I was always here, I didn't know. Until one day, my old partner, Jerry, showed up down here. Becca called him because I wouldn't answer my phone. She had been arrested for buying heroin from an undercover officer."

Heroin, jesus christ! "Mulder, she used heroin! It's not your fault!! It's been years, you have to stop beating yourself up about it! Please, listen to me!"

"Intellecutally, I know she had a choice. She didn't have to do it, but I also know she never would have used anything if I hadn't made her so depressed. I caused her to do this. I just don't know why she wants to talk to me after what I did."

"Maybe she's off the drugs and she wants to make sure you don't blame yourself. Because you shouldn't."

"Well, I'm meeting her for dinner tonight at 7."

"Okay, you'll find out in less than 12 hours. You can handle it."

"I could handle it better it you came with me."

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