a/n: Tenth in the Ripple of Hope followups that Autumn Rayne and I are alternating on.
Whatever the Lady Desires
"Do you know what I want, Benedict?" I shake my head, watching as those fingers move over my arm and across my side, taking hold of my tie. She pulls gently, bringing our mouths very close. "I want," she whispers...
She pauses for effect and I try not to let her know how much she's rattling me. I suspect she has a clue, minx that she is. She's waiting on me.
I raise an eyebrow and smile. "Oh, do tell." I hope it comes out calm and collected because I feel anything but.
She frowns slightly. "Don't you know already?" I can't tell if the pout is real or if it's part of the game. I bank on the latter.
"Oh, I believe that women, especially you, have the agency and skills to communicate their innermost desires, not to mention satisfy them."
"Nice save, Benedict." She tugs gently on my tie. "Hmm, how shall I phrase it?" She pauses dramatically and I tilt my head.
She drops my tie and puts her hand on my right shoulder, walking to my right side, then whispers in my ear, "Something sweet."
Kate takes her hand from my shoulder, then places her finger behind my ear, running her finger around the back of my neck at the hairline. By the time her finger reaches my other ear, I'm covered in goosebumps. "Something sticky in all the best ways," she whispers, and a million naughy thoughts burst simultaneously to mind.
She walks around to face me, puts her hands on my lapels. "And very, very rich." After a moment's pause, she adds, "Think you can help me with that?"
After the rich line, I'm certain she's just teasing me. For all Kate's stated hatred of new money, she's but one generation away from it, and she'd be utterly miserable in a life of poverty. A thought blips past: maybe that's partly what taxed her relationship with Justin. Her shoe collection probably ran half his annual salary, and that's just what I'd seen since the boat disaster. I wonder how much more she'd had before then.
Maybe she'd needed to feel that loss after her boat blew up, and I suddenly drop into her life making her realize that people like me can easily replace the material, but not the immaterial. Stupidly, I'd given her the impression that immaterial didn't matter to me at what was probably exactly the worst possible time to do so.
"I'm sure I could help you with a variety of satisfyingly sweet, sticky, and rich possibilities, Katie. Do you have a preference or should I just pick one?"
I suck in my lower lip, tilt my head, and look at her. She bursts out laughing.
"Are you blushing, Bennie?"
I feel the heat around my neck. I'd been so preoccupied with answering her retort, I hadn't noticed that side effect. I wouldn't call it blushing, not exactly. Hyper aware of Katie, sure. I was just glad she was looking at my neck and not significantly lower at that moment. Well, a little glad.
She puts her cool fingers on my neck. "Wow, you're really hot."
"I'm pleased you think so," I say, smiling. I whisper, "Especially after spending the night in my bed." I return to normal volume to ask, "Shall we go?" I hold out my arm for her.
She takes my arm and follows me to my car. I have an idea of where to take her, but my hands want to drive her to my place for an extended smorgasbord of sweet, sticky, and rich, including at least two items that she'd possibly intended. However, knowing me, I'd want to blow off the rest of the work day and neither the firm nor my case load could afford that today.
"You haven't answered my question," she says when she's buckled in.
During the meeting, I'd come up with several possible answers. My favorite: "Objection, counselor, we have not yet established that I love you." However, I sense that would push her away more than a more truthful and real answer would.
I sigh softly and brush my fingertips on her cheek as I look her in the eyes. "I'm not ready to answer that question." Her smile tells me that she's no more fooled by that answer than I would be, but that it's taken for what it is: an acceptable truth.
"Chocolate cake," she says right before I start the engine. "That's what I'm craving right now."
"If that's what the lady most desires, then that is what the lady shall have."
"I didn't say it was what I most desired," she clarifies. I raise an eyebrow, but she turns away and looks out the window.
"Then chocolate cake it is. I-"
"You know a guy."
I try not to sound irritated. "Not what I was going to say."
She looks at me and puts her hand on mine. "Oh?"
"Do you want lunch and cake or just cake? Because if you want both and are willing to go two places, then we can get the really great cake."
"I've had a rough morning, so I'd like both. Can we get the cake first, though?"
"Of course." I had no idea what she meant by a rough morning. What had I missed in my lingering bliss because she'd spent most of the night in my arms? Now wasn't the time to ask. Right.
I pull into a parking place a block away from Chocolate Monster, feed the meter, and we head into my favorite chocolate place in the city. She puts her hand in mine as we enter, and we settle into a table in the back.
She orders the chocolate cake, while I order the mousse.
While we're waiting for our orders, I'm trying not to think of watching Kate licking chocolate frosting off her fork - or various parts of my anatomy - and utterly fail at both.
Kate studies the many vintage chocolate posters on the wall, and I'm letting her be quiet. I only look where she's looking when a frown flickers on her face before her expression recovers.
One word on that poster is clear: Justin.
With that, I decide that I'm not going to grill her over dessert, and I'm not going to grill her over lunch. Those are to remain pleasant experiences so she'll want to go out with me again.
With each bite, I try to match her sumptuous savoring of her cake with my equally evocative enjoyment of my mousse.
After she finishes, I note she's missed a small spot of frosting near her lip. "Allow me," I offer, holding a clean napkin up. She holds her face still for me, eyes tracking my approaching fingers. I gently wipe the frosting away. "There."
She smiles slightly, then nods her head toward the door, indicating she's ready to leave.
I drop cash for the bill and a generous tip, and we walk in silence back to the Vantage.
"What would you like to eat?" I ask.
"Your choice, since I picked the dessert."
I turn the car south to SoMa and head for Restaurant Lulu, one of my favorite haunts, and toss the keys to the valet.
"I haven't been here in years," she says. "I'd almost forgotten about it."
"I come here at least once a month," I reply. "Usually for lunch."
She asks me to order for her, and I can tell that whatever's been stressing her out is taking its toll. She looks almost green. I order a pork loin sandwich for me and a rosemary chicken sandwich for her as well as a bacon and goat cheese tart appetizer to split. After the waiter leaves, I place my hand on hers. "Everything okay?"
"No, but I don't want to ruin lunch talking about it. Later?" She doesn't move her hand or twitch, and I let my hand linger.
"Okay," I agree, slowly withdrawing my hand.
She savors each bite with less gusto than the chocolate, and we feed each other tastes of our choices. I love the way her eyes watch my lips as she's guiding her fingers to my mouth.
We finish lunch pretty quickly for a restaurant crunch hour, and I help her back into my car after the valet fetches it. I begin to drive, and she starts in.
"I woke up just after dawn, and looked at my phone to see what time it was. Because I'd turned my ringer off, I'd missed a drunk text from Justin."
"Oh?" I ask, my stomach suddenly doing somersaults.
"Yeah. Booty call at one in the morning. I was asleep in your arms at the time."
"Does he frequently text you for booty calls?"
"Not since-" She sighs heavily. "We had a huge argument a few weeks before you joined the firm. He said being with me was like bombs and Christmas. He said that half the time he loved me and half the time he wished he'd never met me. Worst of all, he said this all in my office while other people were still in the building."
"Ouch. I'm sorry, Katie. You don't deserve that."
"That day, I told Leo what happened, and if I ever went back to Justin to have me committed. I changed the ring tone for Justin's cell phone to silence. So he's called me, and I haven't returned personal calls, but of course I have to return the professional ones."
"Which means you need to pretend you're not angry or hurt when you are."
"Yeah," she says softly. "So I woke up and you were so adorably angelic lying there with your arms around me and your hair in a little halo, and Justin's being a total ass. My first thought was that it was Opposite Day, but then I realized what an ass Justin's been for a long time. Before we had sex, he'd never have been able to control himself enough to sleep with me without trying to get some. You were a gentleman, which I wasn't expecting. Kind of hoping you wouldn't be so much of one, frankly."
At that revelation, I want to spend the rest of my life kissing her. A small voice intrudes, asking about the firm. No, I could give that up if I had to, so long as I wind up with Kate. The full weight of that sinks in, and I recall the arguments with Carol over the time spent at the office, and how she said that either that went or she would. I'd cave for a while, then I'd be back working long hours, leading to a boom-and-bust cycle of arguing. But I'd never really wanted to change my tune - until now. And, depressing revelation time, Carol was absolutely right to want out of the relationship, something I hadn't understood until just now.
I chuckle. "Well, we can work on that last. I try not to be an ass in relationships, but I'm just as human as everyone else. You can count on it: I will be one. Probably at the worst possible moment."
Kate doesn't answer but looks out the window.
"So is that why you left my bed? Because of the text?"
"God no. I didn't go visit Justin. I was just confused and wanted space to think."
"It's okay," I say. "The note placement made me smile."
The corners of her lips turn up ever so slightly, but she doesn't say anything.
I drive into the garage underneath the RR&G building, and pull my car into the appointed spot.
We get into the parking garage elevator alone. "So, tonight?"
She looks at me quizzically. "For?"
"Being less of a gentleman. Per your insistence, of course."
"We're not having this conversation," she says.
"Oh, it doesn't need to be a conversation, Katie. A simple 'yes' would do."
She spins and snaps at me. "You are the most infuriating man I've ever met."
I smile and ask sweetly, "Is that why you love me?"
The corners of Kate's lips rise slightly and she gives an obviously prepared answer, "Objection, counselor, we have not yet established that I love you."
Given that she and I are clearly thinking along the same lines, I should call ahead and have Leo start the homicide proceedings. Naturally, I don't. Instead, I press the elevator's stop button and lean in to kiss her, one word on my lips.
"Overruled."