Patterns and Perceptions of a Past
Disclaimer: Not mine.
She felt as if nothing could compare to how things used to be in her school. Nearly two years, since she was a fourth year she couldn't help but notice the change. She was unnerved by it sometimes, and dare she admit it, a little insecure.
It hadn't been only her so this, feeling unsafe, had been a part of the reason why people changed. They walked in groups, once loud corridors now only echoed footsteps, little laughter. Now common room nearly empty, she was occupying the table in the corner. Head bowed, brows furrowed in what seemed like concentration although it was worry. Near the fireplace Potter, Black and Peter sat; they seemed to be arguing about something. Judging by the way even they were careful to make so much noise, she thought not even they'd laugh much today...
The reason why she'd been so worried since morning and their reason for being serious were the same. In the morning, when everybody had been in a haste to get their classes in time, McGonagall appeared and told a first year girl that her parents had been murdered. She broke down in front of everybody, if some people wanted to ignore her, nobody couldn't.
It had been a bad day from the start.
Trying to concentrate, she turned back on her Astronomy homework. Scowling at the paper where she should have been calculating Jupiter's moons, she thought of how pointless this is, she couldn't help but remember about the little girl and that seventh year Ravenclaw a week ago. People forgot eventually. She hardly did. And oh, how she hated her stupid Astronomy homework!
"Mary?" Someone said and she looked up to see James Potter and Peter standing before her. She nodded for Potter to continue.
"The next Quidditch practice is on Friday, I had to change it because Sunday we're allowed to go to Hogsmeade, I forgot about that."
"Alright. No problem. What was Grace thinking when she told us you'd make a great captain, I don't see the point." She said irritatedly. "Forget about me but you can't keep playing on the dates like this, people have business to tend to, you know."
He smirked. "But Quidditch is more important. And -" he checked his watch. "As much as I fancy having this lovely little nagging conversation with you, Sirius is getting bored as hell waiting for me, so gotta go. And inform the rest of the team." he said bossily as he took off.
She rolled her eyes, watching him leave. Ever the insensitive toerag. She smiled at Lily's words about him.
"So you're actually doing that Astronomy homework?" Peter asked.
"Yes, would you stay with me Peter? We could do it together." She offered. At his surprised look, she added, "Oh, you know I'll do it mostly. I know you're not good at it. But I'm really bored. Keep company for some time, please?"
His round face lit up. "Of course." He went to gather his books and Mary wondered where Remus was. She only remembered seeing him at breakfast.
When Peter came back, she was dreamily gazing into space. They started anyway; Peter kept talking in the background...
"Mary? I swear you weren't listening to me this time, were you? What was I talking about?" He said, crossing his arms across his chest.
"Err," she guiltily tucked a strand of dark hair behind her ear. "I'm sorry, my mind must have trailed off."
"If you don't want to hear me talk, you should." he said, pulling her homework in front of him to copy it.
"I don't know what's gotten into me lately." She made a face. Peter laughed. "Getting paranoid and depressed all unlikely times. It's like many things lost its meaning, you see? I mean, look at this," she pointed to her homework. "Mean anything to you? After what happened today, should it? I don't know, Lily told me I can be so naive at times. I feel weak. And I despise the feeling too."
Peter was listening with a weird expression on his face. His eyes were widened a little.
"If you decide on being a philosopher that would be a good choice." he said, looking at her blankly.
She sighed. How could boys be this bad with words? She had no idea.
She tried again. "But you understand what I mean, right?"
The moon papers lay forgotten as he slowly nodded. He swallowed hard. "I think you're scared, Mary."
Her expression grew serious and she shook her head. "No." she said quickly. "I'm not... scared." She gave a nervous laugh.
"It's okay." Peter said, giving her an assuring look. He reached over the table and held her hand. "I'm scared too."
She eyed him, confused. Then she managed a small smile.
"Thanks." she whispered.
TBC...