Disclamer: Stargate sg-1 and anything affliated with the show is not mine.. unfortunatley!
Seasons: after pete left...
Life can feel so lonely sometimes and today is no exception I sit here wondering whether I should move from the cocoon of bed sheets I tangled myself into last night. What's the use getting up there is no one there to say "Hi" make me breakfast, cuddle me and.. I stop myself; there is no one to say "Babe"….. thank god! I hate that pet name, I did tell him but he ignored me and continued to call me it, ew and gross are the words that come to mind when I think of him in this light.
He was always there and to be honest that's a little annoying especially if like me you're an independent, kick ass Colonel in the USAF! I sigh and roll myself of my bed and onto the floor in an attempt to wake myself up. I spring up and walk into the kitchen stretching and yawning widely, I go through my cupboards hunting for any sustenance, ha the USAF teach you how to survive in the jungle and what bugs to eat, but how the hell do you survive in "Samantha Carters Kitchen" the kitchen without food the kitchen without anything but a little out of date dried pasta and some corn flour.
I whack the cabinet door back, and sigh deeply, then I -see it the wedding catalogue with post-its sticking out, post-its he put in. our relationship was like a post-it note insignificantly put on something larger, an attempt to block out feelings, but post-it notes like my relationship are easily removed. I pick up the catalogue and put it in the bin, I feel liberated and strong. Then he walks through my door, glances at my face and walks towards me slowly, his face creased in deep thought. "Good thing that I bought supplies carter, your kitchens fucking empty", it's a throw away comment and so typically him that it makes me giggle. "No giggling carter" he says as he walks out the door and returns with grocery bags. He starts to pack my cupboards as I stand watching him, "hey carter what the hell is this, doing in a food cabinet?" he pulls out a photograph album, I instantly recognise it, it's the album with pictures of me and him together, i hid from Pete as I knew what sort of reaction it would invoke from him. I reach up to grab it. Swinging it easily out of my reach he goes to open it, desperately I tackle him sending him to the floor laughing. "Jeeze Louise..." he gasps between laughs, I realise that im lying on top of him and that if anyone walked in right now what it would look like, but I don't care and as I giggle tears begin to fall. Gathering me to his chest he holds me stroking my hair and murmuring words of comfort, "its ok", "im so sorry", "he wasn't good enough". He catches himself "I mean… I wouldn't know or anything ... it's just—" I cut him off by kissing him firmly on the lips. "He wasn't good enough, you're right". "Im no better Sam" he says between kisses. "Yes you are, you're a good man jack and I love you". We make love vigorously untying the knotted relationship that we have had and opening our barriers and embracing happiness.