I'm sorry for the crack. Forgive the inner pervert. It's not too bad, don't worry. (Or you could be going, "Awww, why not?")
Close the Curtains
"Ka-ah!-Kakashi! Please! Just wait- wait!" Iruka smacked the jounin's hand roughly, glaring and suppressing his own grin. "We're almost home!" he pleaded, jogging out of the jounin's reach, only to run directly into the teleporter's chest.
"What, you don't want to do it on the street?" Kakashi slipped his masked mouth around to cover Iruka's.
The teacher mumbled into the mouth as a wet tongue swiped at the inside of the mask, rubbing against moaning lips. "Al. Most. Home!" Iruka insisted finally, fumbling with keys as he pushed Kakashi's chest backwards up the stairs to the apartment.
They stumbled into the house, Iruka turning around to close and lock the door. After the soft click! of the lock, it was as if Iruka's ignition had started. He whirled around and pulled Kakashi's mask down forcefully.
"Ah!" Kakashi exclaimed happily at the sudden willing partner.
"We're home now." Iruka stated, Kakashi accepting that cue without missing a beat.
()O()
"Wazzat?" Kakashi mumbled, mouth half muffled by the pillow he was drooling on. His senses dulled as he wondered when he had gained the down comforter to be draped across his legs and kicked it off in annoyance.
Iruka had tucked his head beneath Kakashi's chin, due to the fact he'd had his pillow stolen sometime that morning, then moaned when his blanket was kicked away completely. He curled into a ball, knee meeting Kakashi's groin lightly. "Mmm... Blanket…" he moaned forlornly.
"Hey there... watch where you're putting your bony little legs." Kakashi grunted, adjusting to instead pull the leg between his. He flopped an arm over Iruka's shoulders. "You hear somethin'?"
Iruka yanked on his lost pillow, no longer fearing to wake up the sleeping jounin. For he had learned during the first few months of their relationship it was not a good idea to yank things away from ex-anbu in their sleep. They fought tooth and nail for anything they held, whether conscious or not.
"I dunno. It'll go away soon." he promised, then groaned and pushed the pillow away, wiping his face of the cold moisture. "Dammit, Kakashi. I wish you'd stop drooling on everything I own." He growled, turning the pillow over and throwing his head into it.
Kakashi smiled lazily and leaned over, mouth enveloping Iruka's neck. "'Dis count?"
Iruka considered for a moment, tilting his chin up to allow further access to the nape of his neck. "Mm. No. You can drool over me all you want." he decided, rolling onto his back.
Kakashi smirked and rolled with him, covering his chest and taking the invitation to the relaxing morning of gropage.
(0)o(0)
Naruto pondered the absence of both teachers from their normal duties. Kakashi he could understand, he was used to losing Kakashi from the face of the earth. Generally Iruka was in his designated areas during the day. After enquiring at the missions office politely where Iruka-sensei had gone off to, he only received perturbed looks and demands to go look somewhere else. After dashing away from that particular broken window, he left at an easy pace down the street.
His search was worth one more try at Iruka's house, for the last time he had tried he hadn't actually attempted to get in. It was plausible that Iruka-sensei just hadn't heard the door.
(O).(O)
"Mm?" Kakashi's head snapped up from the mouth he was happily molesting. He'd sensed a new presence before seeing it. Just as he looked up, the curious face that peered into the window only needed a second and a half to register what he was seeing.
"Uuuuwaaaaaah!"
Kakashi gasped and fumbled, jerking sideways in a futile attempt to do something about this predicament. Iruka yelped in pain, kicking Kakashi off of him and rolling sideways, face twisted in agony. A crash in the front room, then the bedroom door bounced open
"Get off Iruka-sensei you perv-dog-Kakashi!" Naruto yelled, assailing his beloved sensei's attacker, who happened to be his other sensei.
"Naruto, wait, -ow!" Kakashi missed the kunai blade in his little hand, then snapped out and grabbed the boys wrists. "Stop, just wait!" he snapped, frantic about the fact he was naked, and the idea that he and Iruka had just been caught red handed doing the horizontal limbo. "I'm gonna bash your-!"
"Naruto!" Iruka grabbed the kitsune's foot just as it swung forward to almost make contact with his lover's precious goods. "Naruto, stop, wait!" He looked at the fuming Kakashi, on the verge of 'this little brat is going to die if he ever tries that again'.
"Okay, calm down." Iruka wrapped his arms around the boy and held him up and away from Kakashi, a move of protection for both sides of the fight. "Just, let us put some clothes on, okay?" he set the boy in the bathroom then closed the door on him abruptly, making a quick jutsu to lock the door from the boy's capabilities of destructively breaking through them. Iruka turned around, staring at the red faced jounin. "It's okay, we'll get this straightened out." Iruka assured him.
Kakashi, rubbed his aching jewels and leaned forward. "Ow." he stated flatly, looking around on the ground for his clothes.
"You're telling me, Kami." Iruka winced, limping to his dresser to dig through his clothes.
(-).(-)
Iruka opened the door, looking in at the boy carefully. "Okay... we're dressed."
Naruto's red face was buried in his knees as he sat on the floor of the bathroom, a cabinet supporting his back. "Mm. Is Kaka-perv-dog still here?"
Iruka chuckled lightly, "Yes, he is. And that's Kaka-perv-dog-sensei." he winked to Naruto's mildly surprised gaze. "Come on." he motioned for the boy to come out of the bathroom.
Naruto sat on the couch opposite Kakashi, who was fully clad in face mask, hitai-ate, and vest already, but looking distinctly disgruntled. Iruka sat beside the white hair jounin, taking his hand. "Naruto... Kakashi and I have been dating for some time now, you must not have heard the rumor going around. He wasn't molesting me like you thought. We both consented so it wasn't just him that was-"
Naruto promptly plugged his ears with his fingers and stood up. "LALALALA- I can't hear you! - LALALALALALALA!" he ran out the open door, unceremoniously having been blown of it's hinges earlier. The two Shinobi watched the young ninja run out the door, down the stairs, and down the block still singing.
"Well... that went over relatively easy." Iruka mused, hesitant but generally happy that the boy hadn't completely blown up at him. "Don't you think?"
Kakashi stood, sealing the house a new door before turning to Iruka. "Bed. Now."
Iruka frowned, then snorted a smirk when jerked towards his bedroom. "Kaka-perv-dog-sensei all better after the little run in with his little student's foot?"
"As soon as you're naked it will be."
Hm. I didn't really like this one-shot as much as my others. But I decided to give it to you anyway because there is worse junk out there. I haven't taken into consideration that this will frown upon what small reputation I might have, but that is why I explain to you now: the good one-shot is called Helping Hand. KakaIru drunkenness ensues. It's totally fantabulous.