Author's note: Second Death Note fiction. This is to combat the seriousness of Mistaken. And because I only received a few reviews with hardly any criticism of L's character and thoughts, I shall immediately assume that my characterization of L was impeccable. Any OOCness in this story will be of absolutely no fault of mine.
But you are always more than welcome to give constructive criticism.

Rating: Rated PG for suggestive... words. And the overall crack of it all.

Disclaimer: Death Note is not mine. But it's nice to imagine that it is. Especially L. Oh yes.

Summary: Light hears strange, suspicious noises in the night. L meets his one true love.

It was a long day. Light was totally exhausted. Working with the detective was no joke; he had piercing eyes that stared right through his soul. Even though Light had stated continuously that he was innocent, the detective could make him feel dirty through and through.

Lately, it had gotten worse. L did not have a chance to eat any cake all day; Watari had apparently left to attend to some 'serious business' and the supply of cake had ran out. Since no one on the investigation team wanted to work on a public holiday, L had no one to fetch his cake for him.
Though his expression and tone remained unchanged, L was considerably more irritable.

"Yagami-kun, please control your outbursts. I will assure you that you will regret it. I will get a dog, name it Light of Kira, and send a picture and an article of it to the Pet Lovers' Column. 'My pet, Light of Kira, though adorable, has the most horrible bitchy fits. It thinks itself wonderful and carries itself with great dignity. But once it does not get its way, it starts defecating all over the place and starts gnawing at my ankle. It is most disgraceful, really.'"

It was the first time L had made so verbose a threat. Though the insult smarted, Light felt a shiver go down his spine and kept silent for the next few hours. He had a feeling that L would carry out his threat, even if it meant ordering a poor defenseless puppy through the internet. One which had large brown eyes, brown fur and no toilet training whatsoever.

The day passed quietly and peacefully, albeit L's constant twitching. It was probably the withdrawal symptoms.

---

Night arrived, and Light collapsed into the bed. Without his sugar, L was equally tired for once. Light fell asleep, followed by L. They both floated into the land of dreams, where all was right and peaceful.

Light's dream - which was about clouds, golden ladders and a golden throne, but Light's dreams weren't really important as they were all about him anyway - was suddenly interrupted by a soft, quiet sound from the other end of the bed.

"Oh…..Yes…I do want you… don't go away…"

Light shot up. Who was L talking to?

"What do you want, L? Please don't talk like that."

L let out a quiet sob. "But I need you…"

Light's mind broke.

He had not anticipated this. He got out a pillow and stuffed it over his head, all in the space of a few seconds.

As Light carefully pieced together the fragments of his brain, he carefully contemplated what would be the most advantageous step that he could take. Light smacked himself when he realized what he could have just done.

"Using L would be so easy if I had just stayed there and, I don't know, given him a hug or something. Then maybe he will stop accusing me of being Kira and take off these blasted handcuffs. Okay, let's try that again."

Light, with mind and soul finally whole again, made his way across the bed to L. He was about to speak to him, when he realized L's eyes were closed.
He was still asleep. Light was stunned. He was about to make his way back to his side of the bed when L grabbed his leg and started talking again.

"Mmm… yes, that feels good… you taste great..."

Light froze. Maybe Misa was right. L was a pervert. He told himself never to underestimate Misa's gut feelings again. He was about to shake L off when L started again.

"Yes… you're very tasty, my strawberry shortcake…"

So L was having… with cake. And he was doing it…with cake.

Light's mind shattered.
He became what was known as "petrified", a word which has two meanings; "to be paralyzed with horror", or "to cause to become stiff or stone-like".
Light was petrified in every sense of the word.

In L's dream, there was much confusion. After walking around in what seemed like a long time, he finally saw a spark of hope. There was light in the middle of unending darkness, and within that light was cake. He ran towards it, but it kept getting further. He called after it, but to no avail. The cake mocked him in all its pink, sugary glory. "Submit unto me, my dearest! Only then may you have me."

"Oh…..Yes…I do want you… don't go away…" L pleaded.

"What do you want, L? Please don't talk like that." That voice sounded strangely familiar, but L assumed it was the cake anyway, since there was no one else around.

"But I need you…"

Suddenly, the darkness was suddenly sucked in by the cake and evolved into the largest strawberry shortcake he had ever seen. Whatever darkness that enveloped him was now replaced by cake. It was fluffy, soft and so wonderfully squishy. L rolled about in it and took big bites of it with every ten rolls he made. He was in bliss.

---

The next morning, the rest of the investigation came. None of them could fathom why Light looked so haggard, and why L looked like he had just met his true love. The reasons why this was the case was because Light, being petrified, could not go back to his sleeping state the entire night.

Why L looked like he just met his one true love, was because he did meet his one true love during that night.

He just had strawberry shortcake this morning, too.

Looking back at it, I'd so kill to have L's dream.

Anyone who wants to join the L/Cake or the Cake/L fan club, please sign up here today. You know you cannot deny the powerful connection between those two. Continue the trend! Write about this marvellous pairing! And when I think there's enough people who support this pairing, I shall create a C2 community.