So, as you probably know, this is my first Human Au and I'm very excited actually, but also pretty nervous about this one, I've never done this. I actually always wanted to do one, but never started to write it, but then InsaneDutchGirl came with this amazing Human AU story, so I decided to make one too.

Hope you enjoy x

"Should I lock the last open door, my ghost are gaining on me."

TMNT

I sat here, my backpack loosely on my back, watching the park in front of me. My fingers were gripping the soft leather resting on top of my shoulder. My heart viciously beating against my chest as I prepared myself for the moment that was about to come. I was nervous, scared. There was no denying I was. Would they recognize me?

That very question went through my head the whole time I was here, and the whole week already. Would they know who I really was, or would they believe the lie I was forced to live in? I didn't know, and to be honest, I didn't want them to know, they could never know about it. But somehow I knew they would anyways.

The soft wind was around me, taking my hair in every direction and I closed my blue eyes for a second. I didn't want to leave, I was scared, I really was. Scared to be recognized, or worse; that they would recognize me. And again my heart started pounding in my chest, until it was getting too be painful.

I knew I was being foolish. Of course they would recognize me. Of course they would tell each other so they could get me. Even when I wasn't on their school anymore, they would still go after me. I would pay for the mistakes I had made. My breathing began to increase rapidly, images swimming through my head again.

I moaned slightly and placed my hands on both sides of my temple, gritting my teeth. It wasn't real, this wasn't real. The laugh of the little girl, the sweet and beautiful girl I used to play with just a few years ago, and now all that was left of her were the terrified screams, the scars littering her body.

My breath hitched in my chest and my hand immediately flew to my chest, squeezing it and trying to get my breathing under control. The screams, the terrible screams that would leave her throat were ringing through my head, attacking me and pounding on my chest until it was too painful to breathe.

A warmth flushed over me as another scream tore out of her mouth. I couldn't stop, it was all my fault. And because of that, she had to suffer, and even at this moment. I buried my face in my own hands, trying to stop the tears from flowing. I couldn't show up with red eyes, not again but somehow my body wouldn't listen to me.

The tears started falling before I could even stop them, staining my cheeks with my own tears. I was tired, just so tired but they kept streaming down my face. My face was still throbbing, my cheek aching and a bruise already forming where the fist had hit me. I didn't even cry back then, so why did I have to cry now?

Again I gritted my teeth, angrily wiping them away. I couldn't cry. No, I could cry and I had done that a lot already but I wasn't allowed to cry. Nobody said I wasn't allowed to do it, it was me who did. I didn't allow myself to cry. I didn't deserve to cry, not when all of this was my fault, I could've stopped with the lie, but I didn't.

And yet I was, crying on the bench in the park. I was supposed to be in school already but I couldn't force myself to leave the safety. I enjoyed the nature around me, it was calming and gave me time to think. And sometimes that was just what I needed, and sometimes it wasn't. It would often bring back memories.

Things I wanted to forget so badly. And even though I hated them I couldn't get myself to leave this place. The aching died down slightly, like it always did and I slowly opened my eyes. They were blurred by the tears brimming in my eyes and I quickly wiped them away with the back of my hand, sniffling slightly.

I silently cursed myself and rubbed my eyes slightly, trying to get rid of the red eyes I was sure I was having right now. I took a deep breath and looked around, trying to see if someone had seen me, but luckily the park was nearly abandoned in the morning, only a few people walking by.

Of course the park was abandoned right now, nobody dared to take a step inside of the park because of everything that had happened, but I wasn't scared for something that couldn't hurt me even more, it wasn't possible. And it hurt to think about it really, it was my fault after all the park was practically empty at this time.

Nobody dared to step into the park when it was still dark, nobody wanted to enter the park when there was no way to see each other, and now, when it was slowly starting to get lighter again, people were entering the park, but there were still a bit hesitant, and it mostly took a few more hours before the park was normally filled again.

That was exactly the reason I was here right now. Nobody would go looking for me here, nobody would even think about it. They thought I would never come to this park again, at least not during the day. And nobody had the guts to visit me during the night when I was indeed in the park. So I just sat here most of the time, thinking about all the stuff that was happening around me.

Again the beautiful face of the little girl came into my mind. She was only 9 years old. 7 years old when it happened, when her life was completely shattered by the perfectly innocent bullet from the gun. Everybody makes mistakes, and they are made to be forgiven eventually. But some are just too big to be forgiven, and they will haunt you forever.

From all those faces, I only remembered her. The smile she wore, the tears on the first day, and the tears I had worn that day. I didn't understand it at that time, not fully at least. I was only 13 at that time but I knew it wasn't right what I was doing. I wanted to stop, but the fear took the better half of me, rejecting the idea.

That was something I could never forgive myself, every time I see her I am reminded, and every time the terrible aching in my chest starts again, cutting off the air and denying any oxygen from going through my lungs. It would always end, like everything did, but it would always take time for it to leave.

I should be at school already, my first lesson had started already. My teachers knew about it, not everything but they knew about everything that was known to the rest of the world, and they had assured me it wasn't a problem I would be late, or would skip lessons if I'd tell them first, but I wasn't planning on doing so.

How much I just wanted to run away from everything, I knew I couldn't. I had to face it someday, I had to attend school in the end, no matter what everyone had said. I had to face them eventually. I was just so grateful I got rid of the rest a few days ago, but they would always haunt me, that was sure, they weren't about to let me go.

My movements were sloppy from sitting for such a long time. My arms stretched and popped slightly at the strain but I ignored it and got to my feet. The school wasn't far from the park I was at, hardly a street. It was in fact used a lot. Most students used it to get home, and take a short-cut through the park.

My heart pounded with every step I took. I knew the school already so I wasn't worrying about finding everything, I was just worried about the amount of information they had, and the rest of the students. Maybe they already knew it was me, and they already figured out who I was.

Everybody in the country knew me after all, but almost none would recognize me in real-life, but once they knew there was no going back. And that was something I was worried about the most. I just hoped that these students would be a little bit better, but somehow I knew that was something I shouldn't hope for. My breath hitched as I stopped in front of the school, my heart pounding painfully once again.

'Don't stop now Mikey' I whispered to myself, encouraging myself to take the last step. The air in the school wasn't as dense as in my previous school but it was suffocating at the same time. I could hear the people all around me, talking and laughing. And none of them knew who was entering their school right now.

My fingers clamped around the soft leather around my shoulder as I made my way through the hall and up the stairs, silently walking over to the right classroom. My fingers reached for the door, I wasn't that late, just 10 minutes so I was sure they wouldn't send me away, but that wasn't the thing I was afraid of, it were the people inside.

TMNT

So what do you all think? Should I continue with it or just stick with the regular turtles? ^^