This is really, really cracky but it was really fun to write! The song that Mercedes sings is Playing God by Paramore. This is going to be just a one shot but if I get enough reviews I might add some more chapters. Also, sorry it's so short I'm bad at writing long Fanfics -3-
Brad was having a bad day. First of all, none of his favorite Klaine fanfics had been updated, and yet again, none of them had featured him. Honestly, he had suffered through playing piano for enough Rachel Berry solos to be mentioned at least ONCE but no.
Also, he hadn't killed anyone in weeks.
Being a serial killer is harder than it looks. On the surface he had to appear to be innocent ol' Brad, or just That-Guy-Playing-The-Piano-Who-Sugar-Motta-Is-Always-Winking-At.
However, today he had a different mission. He wanted to recruit Mercedes Jones as his partner in crime. That diva storm out had really shown her potential. He didn't want to date her or any thing (he shipped samcedes) but he needed someone to help him with the mass massacre he had planned for the end of the season. His chance came when she stayed late one day at Glee club to practice her solo.
"Hit it!" she said. She turned to glare at him when he didn't start playing. Quickly he held up the index cards he had prepared for this moment. This index card read:
Hello, Mercedes.
"Uh… hi," she said, "Can't you talk?"
He puzzled over this before pulling out the correct card:
I don't know.
"Okaaaaay…" she said, looking suspicious.
I need your help.
"With what?" she asked. Quickly, through a series of complicated index cards, some that even had diagrams, he explained his plan for the mass massacre of her fellow Glee members. "So… you're a serial killer," she said.
Yes.
She looked unconvinced.
I'll let you have the honor of killing Rachel Berry.
This perked her interest. "All right, but only on one condition. You spare Kurt and his boy toy." He considered this for a moment.
All right, but think of all the tragic fanfictions that could have been written!
She looked confused. "What's fanfiction?"
Never mind. See you tomorrow, miss accomplice.
"Tommorow."
The next day in Glee club Mercedes raised her hand before Mr. Schuester could open his over-emotional mouth. "Mr. Schue," she said, "I have a song I've prepared." She skipped to the front of the room and stood next to the piano."This is for my new friends and old enemies." She stared pointedly at Rachel as she said the word "enemies". Brad started playing the piano. As the notes surged Mercedes began to sing, her voice turning huskier than usual.
Can't make my own decisions
Or make any with precision
Well maybe you should tie me up
So I don't go where you don't want me
She kept singing as she walked around the room, taunting the Glee clubbers as she sang.
You say that I been changing
that I'm not just simply aging
Yeah how could that be logical?
Just keep on cramming ideas down my throat
She snapped the last line with menace before jumping straight into the chorus.
You don't have to believe me
But the way I, way I see it
Next time you point a finger
I might have to bend it back
Or break it, break it off
Next time you point a finger
I'll point you to the mirror
Brad really wanted to give her a thumbs up but he was concentrating too hard on getting the notes right. After several more angst filled verses Mercedes sang the last lines of the song.
Next time you point a finger
I'll point you to the mirror
Mercedes bowed and was greeted with nervous applause from her fellow Glee clubbers. Sending on last wink to Brad, she waltzed back to her seat. Mr. Schuester stood up. "Well that was... interesting Mercedes. We could really hear the emotion in your voice," he said and then continued droning on about this weeks assignment.
They have no idea what's coming... thought Brad. Having an accomplice was definitely going to be fun...
Wow that was crackier than I thought it would be... Please Favorite and Comment! I appreciate you guys so much!