Hey, first of all I wanted to say if someone is sensitive towards this subject don't read! Nobody should try any of these things at home, they are not worth it. No way in hell this fanfic is pro ED's, you'll notice Elena's suffering through the whole process.

I do not own tvd or any of its characters. English is not my first language!

Elena's POV

7 am

Hey, my name's Elena Gilbert. I'm seventeen years old. I should be going to school right now but the thing is, I've been from hospital to hospital since I was twelve. No, I don't have a brain tumor or anything like that. People call me 'anorexic', but I don't think that term suits me as I am well aware that I'm not skinny enough. It's never enough.

This last hospitalization was for a different matter, though. I took too many sleeping pills, trying to kill myself but I just couldn't. So here I am, in the beautiful world and pretty much alive. Although I feel like the walking dead...

I don't have the strength to walk more than ten meters without tiring myself up. I'm extremely cold all the time and my heart sometimes raises so hard I can almost feel it jumping off of my chest... yet the feeling of starvation makes me feel whole, complete. I'm addicted to it.

I lit my cigarette next to the window so the smell wouldn't remain in the room. They didn't let me smoke inside the hospital because of the smell and because they said it kept us without hunger. But I've never really minded breaking rules...

Today I was leaving this damn whole and going back home. I didn't know if that was good or bad. Which place was worse? I had no idea.

And I was going back to my junior year in High School. Another terrible place...

Maybe it was better being in no place at all...

Damon's POV

7 am

RING!

The alarm clock rang and I complained as I sat down on the bed. Shit. I hated early mornings.

My name is Damon Salvatore. I'm eighteen years old and I'm at my senior year in High School.

You could say I have a 'normal' life. I have a group of friends, a younger brother who is like another friend to me, my parents... Everything's going just fine.

The football team is my life. It makes me popular, and I get to have fun. So it's a double win. Besides, I'm getting a university scholarship for playing football. But I don't care much about that; let's leave that for my parents.

I don't have a girlfriend and am not planning on having one any time soon. Let's say I like taking advantage of my looks and enjoying life with more than one woman at a time. Why have a girlfriend when I could have any woman at all?

Okay, don't hate me or start calling me cocky, I'm just aware of my blue eyes, raven sexy hair and irresistible body...

But anyways, I was arriving late.

I rushed to change my clothes and hurried downstairs to take a bite of my toast, kissed my mom on the cheek and went into my car.

Elena's POV

12 PM

I laid my suitcase on the floor when I walked out of the cab and had a look at my house: How much did I hate it, from one to ten? Mmm... let's see... ten.

I walked through the front door and there was nothing but silence inside. "Hello?!" I exclaimed. "Anybody home?!"

A moment later a man in his twenty with no pants walked down the stairs. I rolled my eyes as he greeted me and grabbed his pants which were on the floor.

"Bye" He said, going outside while putting on his pants.

"Elena, sweetheart" Isobel, a.k.a. my mother said, walking down the stairs. "Oh, you're still skinny, you look awful give me a hug" She said pulling me into a hug but I didn't hug her back. "Are you eating? Tell me you are"

"Yes, mother" I lied between greeted teeth. "Where are my siblings?" I asked for the only good thing about my home.

"Oh, I haven't seen them in a while" Isobel said, lighting a cigarette at that moment. "Jeremy must be getting stoned somewhere" She said, not giving it much importance. She surely didn't even know it was a school day. "And who knows about Katherine, maybe she's going into prostitution now..." She joked and laughed on her own, as I just looked at her like the nasty woman she was. "I have to leave now. There's a carrot on the fridge, eat it if it's not rotten yet" She said before taking off.

I was left alone.

Home alone again, just like in old times when I would starve myself for days and no one would ever bother me.

I walked upstairs and into my old bedroom I used to share with my twin sister.

I looked at my stupid teddy bear and grabbed it and tossed it away. It reminded me of a younger, innocent self me and my siblings just weren't anymore. Like life was just flowers and teddy bears all over the place... What a lie.

I entered the bathroom we shared with our younger brother and looked at myself in the mirror. My mom had been right for once in her life: I looked... tired and awfully ugly. My hair was a mess and I had dark circles under my brown eyes.

Tomorrow I would start school again. I would have to stand the stares at me, as everyone already knew I was 'the girl of the pills'. Katherine had admitted me that was how they called me, before she dropped school.

I wondered where she was now... She must have left town, for sure. No one could stand living with Isobel for much time...

Damon's POV

12 PM

I was at lunch table with my 'gang'. That was Tyler Lockwood and Niklaus Mikaelson with his girlfriend Caroline Forbes, and his sister Rebekah Mikaelson. The three of us were football players and the girls were cheerleaders, and we were the most popular group at school. We ruled it. And we ruled it well.

Everybody wanted to be one of us, or wanted to be WITH us. It was normal that girls would throw themselves at us, we were just used to it.

"So I just told her, stop talking..." Klaus was saying and we all laughed.

Klaus was kind of the leader of the gang, and I was his best friend so I was kind of number two in the popularity rank. Yeah, I spend a lot of time thinking about being popular and how important that is...

"You're so funny, honey" Caroline told him and kissed his cheek.

"She's such a weirdo, that Bennet girl" I said so that everyone would agree with me. I actually kind of liked Bonnie, but sorry, the gang is the gang.

"I know, right?" Rebekah said.

We weren't bullies, but yes, we criticized people. So what?

"What about your party, Tyler, have you been organizing it?" Klaus asked Tyler.

"Yes, it will be awesome" Tyler said with a smile. "Only for cool people, of course"

"No Bennets there?" Rebekah joked and we all laughed.

"You're mean" Caroline said, still amused.

Yeah, we could be mean sometimes...

Elena' POV

1 PM

I went to my shrink's office on foot, as my mom had taken the car. It was good though, I would burn calories this way. Besides, Mystic Falls was a small town and there were no long distances.

I walked at a good pace, so that I would burn even more calories and arrived there in less than an hour.

Giuseppe Salvatore had been my shrink -whenever I was at home and not at a hospital- since I was twelve years old and started treating my 'food problems', so he was already used to me visiting him without making any appointment at all. He was the best shrink not only in town but in the whole State. If only I wasn't the most difficult patient in the State...

I rang the bell of his house and continued moving with anxiety. Why did he take so long?

He opened the door and I didn't even give him time to greet him. "Peppe, finally" I said, walking into the office.

"Hello, Elena" He said as I went to lie on the couch. "How are you doing?"

"Awful" I started. "I saw my mom today. She's still a bitch"

"Were you expecting her to change?" Giuseppe asked, sitting at his chair.

"Not really." I admitted. "And my siblings are AWOL" I continued. "I'm starting school tomorrow and I feel like I will panic because my sister won't be there"

"But you have Bonnie, right?" Giuseppe said.

"I guess..." I said.

"Anyways, I think you haven't been eating Elena, correct me if I'm wrong..." He said, of course looking at my skinny self.

"Hospital food sucks" I said even though I knew he wouldn't believe me.

"Right..." He said taking some notes. "We're gonna have to talk about you taking those pills, Elena"

"Not today" I said and he nodded.

Just thinking about that day made me want to throw up. ade me want to throw up.

I had to erase this story and post it again because it didn't appear on the index. Sorry for the people who followed it, I hope you find it again! See you next chapter