Author's note: I was listening to songs on Youtube, and the son, Just a little girl, by Trading Yesterday came to my mind! It was like an epiphany! So, I came up with this one shot. This is for Sorceress of the nile, because her character is what this is based on ^-^ These are just little snipets from her childhood. After the bold words, a new one starts. Oh, and I added a character from Breath of Life in it. His name is Amon, and if you keep reading, you can guess their relationship XD Hope you don't mind Sorceress

Warnings: Abuse and unintentional neglect

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Zireira and her family belong to Sorceress of the Nile

You never cared to hear the other side,

So why would you care to keep this thing alive,

You paint me into the memory of all your pain,

But I will not be drawn into the past again

"Father, when can I see Nia? I haven't seen or played with her in weeks!"

The girl's Father looked down at her with not so much as a glance. He took a sip from his goblet slowly, carefully answering the question. "Not now, Zireria, she's busy training. Leave your younger sister alone."

Zireria frowned, feeling irritated. "But Father, I must see her. I know she will want to see me!"

Her Father growled, stepping towards the fourteen year old and backhanded her, sending her sprawling to the floor. She winced, holding her cheek and staring up at him with frightened eyes. He scoffed at her and turned around, his robes swishing as he walked. Tenionia appeared in the archway just then, looking confused as to why her sister was on the floor.

"Sister, what happened?"

"Go away," Zireria spat, seeing her little sister flinch. "You're just being a pest."

Tenionia looked hurt, but Zireria made no move to apologize or comfort her. She narrowed her eyes at the smaller girl. What was so special about her? She was just a child, a child couldn't do anything.

Cause all of this is all that I can take,

And you could never understand the demons that I face,

So go ahead and bat your eyes and lie right to the world,

For with everything you are, you're just a little girl,

"Mother, why are you in such a rush? I thought we were to take a walk?"

Her Mother glanced at her with a hurried look, carrying a bundle in her arms. "Not right now, Zireria, I'm busy. I have to make sure Tenionia is taken care of after her training. I'm sure you'll understand. Maybe next time, okay?"

Zireria frowned, her eyes narrowing. "You always say that. It never happens," she murmured, but her Mother didn't hear her. She looked out the window, seeing Silos chatting with her 'precious' younger sister. Her brother hardly talked to her anymore. She wondered why, but she had a feeling it had something to do with Tenionia. Everything was about Tenionia it seemed.

I never meant for you to feel this way,

The Decembers were never meant to be our graves,

It's not a question of who is wrong and what is right,

But time can not heal what you will never recognize,

"Zireria, come here. I would like to have a word with you."

Zireria went over to her Father, bowing her head politely. Her Father smiled, looking out the window where a desert bird was circling the area, chriping a happy song. Zireria looked hesitantly at him. "Yes, Father?"

Her Father looked to her, the smile fading. "I heard you tried to bother Tenionia while she was practicing. Is that true?"

"I just wanted to talk to her, I didn't know she was studying," she said, anger welling up again. "I'm sorry."

Her Father did not say anything, but a harsh slap to the face made her freeze. Silos stepped forward, seeing their Father hit her, but their Father raised his hand. He grabbed Zireria by the collar of her dress, seeing her panciked look. He laughed. "You insolent brat, always sneaking around and trying to mess with my things. Who do you think you are?"

"Gah," Zirerai choked as his grip on her neck tightened. He slammed her head against the wall, waiting for an answer. She looked up with painful eyes. "I...I...I'm sorry!"

"Father! Please stop!"

"Stay out of this, boy!" Their Father snarled and then turned back to his daughter. He moved her body closer to the window, a smile lighting his face. "I get you, you little bitch. But remember this, You. Aren't. Wanted. No one needs you."

Tears stained her eyes, and then, she was falling. Her Father just stared down at her with cruel eyes. She landed on the ground with a hard thump, her body screaming in pain as her shoulder was cut with something sharp. Through the pain, she could see Tenionia and Silos rushing to her, and she could see the guilt in Silos' eyes and the confusion in her sister's.

In that moment, she hated Tenionia more than anything.

Cause all of this is all that I can take,

And you will never understand the Demon's that I face,

So go ahead and bat your eyes and lie right to the world,

For with everything you are, you're just a little girl,

A few months after her injuries had healed, she made no attempt to see Tenionia. Her Father was pleased, he made no attempt to hurt her. Silos always looked as if were guilty for what happened, but he paid no attention to her either. Zireria sighed, the bitterness growing. She had noted she had gotten crankier and irritable. Her Mother told her Father that she was growing into a woman, but neither of them made any attempts to understand. They were too busy dealing with Tenionia and her changes.

Zireria walked into the library, finding the forbbiden section and sneaking the books back to her room. She never kept the same book in one area, so she carried the dark arts book with her everywhere. She read, she practiced, and before too long, she was able to things that precious Tenionia couldn't do. The first spell she tried was an illusion one.

The spell was not hard to do, but it took concentration. She found Tenionia's favorite horse one day, and tried it out. The horse began writhing in pain, twitching and trying to escape it. The stable boys did not know what to do, and neither did the healers. Zireria just smiled silently as this was going on. She took pride in this. Not every sixteen year old girl could do that.

It wasn't before long that Silos had saught her out. It was a nice day, and he had told her what had happened to the horse. "They had to kill it," he said sadly. "Poor Tenionia is distraught," he glanced at her. "I know she would love to have her big sister with her."

"I don't want to see her. If she's so sad, why don't you comfort her?"

Silos looked taken aback by her tone, but he grabbed her wrist before she could leave. "If this is about...the incident. I'm sorry, but don't blame Tenionia. She was not there."

Zireria pulled her wrist out, and slapped him. He blinked, but anger was in his eyes as well. "Zireria," he growled. "What's wrong with you? You're not acting like you used to. Everyone is worried. You know Mother will listen to you."

"Mother doesn't care," she spat. "She never has."

"Yes she does!"

She looked at him, feeling power rise in her but she kept it down. "You're really annoying, you know that? Everyone's an idiot here, but the real idiot is you. So why don't you go comfort your 'precious sister', and don't ever bother me again!"

So go ahead and cry,

Go ahead believe that you were right,

To keep away the dark,

To help you sleep tonight,

When she was seventeen, she finally commited her first murder. She watched with blank eyes as her Mother died, placing the knife in her hands so that it looked like a suicide. When they found her Mother, Tenionia tried to comfort her, but she turned away. Later that day, her sister confronted her again.

"Zireria, have I done something?"

Zireria just walked away from her, not wanting to deal with the thirteen year old. The pain was too great to deal with, that was, until a new lieutenant came to the court. His name, was Amon. Their Father had presented his children to him, and she was surprised that he didn't even acknowledge Tenionia's prescence. He looked straight at her with hazel brown eyes and kissed her hand. "You're even more beatiful than people say, Princess Zireria."

Both her younger siblings gaped at her, surprised that he hadn't greeted Tenionia at first. Her Father just laughed, shaking his head. "Be careful, Amon, she causes quite a lot of trouble."

She noted Silos clench his fists, but he did not say anyting. She felt smug, and for once, a small part of her soul cried out.

Go on and decide,

Who is wrong, what is right

Cause you know inside,

She didn't see Amon too much after that, but he did walk with he at least once a week. She liked that he never paid any attention to Tenionia and that pleased her. She liked Amon, he was kind, he was gentle. She didn't tell him too much about her, but one day, he took her hand and looked at her thoughtfully. "You know," he said noncholantly. "You don't have to hide from me. I'm not here to hurt you."

He had been restationed soon after that, and Zireria continued to practice her magic. She finally acomplished a hard spell, one that took away person's senses. She liked this one, she wished that she could not feel anything.

Cause all of this is all that I can take,

And you could never understand the demons that I face,

So go ahead and bat your eyes and lie right to the world,

For with everything you are, you're just a little girl,

When their Father told them he chose Tenionia to be the new ruler, she finally showed her family her abilities. Tenionia had tried to stop her, but their Father intervened. Silos and Tenionia had to leave the room, leaving Zireiria by herself.

"You little bitch," he growled. "Have you learned nothing?"

He made a move to attack her, but she used the spell she had learned a long time ago. He withered on the floor, gasping in pain while she just watched. "You see, Father, I did not just sit around and watch my bitch of a sister learn magic. I deserve the throne!"

He dismissed her after that, and she walked away with her head held high. It was only the next night, that Silos and Tenionia escaped to Egypt. Silos had been caught and brought back, only to be executed immediatly for treason. As he was forced to his knees, his eyes met hers and he mouthed. "I love you," before the sword sliced his head off.

To say she was not sad would be a lie. She kept herself locked away in her room for a day. She did not cry, she had no room left in her for that, but the twenty year old woman was surprised when her door creaked open and a familiar face popped in. "Princess Zireria?"

"Amon!"

He walked forward, bowing to her formally. "I've come to announce that your Father plans to still keep Tenionia on the throne."

"Of course he does," she scoffed. "That old man, well, I have plans for him."

Amon tilted his head. "What sort of plans?"

She smiled cruelly. "You'll just have to see, but in the mean time, you may call me Queen. For that's what I will be before too long.

She had expected Amon to call her a traitor, but he just got onto his knees and bowed. "Yes, my Queen."

For all of this is all that I can take,

And you could never understand the demons that I face,

So go ahead and bat your eyes and lie right to the world,

For with everything you are, you're just a little girl,

The pain when Tenionia sent her to the shadow realm was unbearable. She wandered around in the dark, feeling nothing but cold. She wanted to feel Amon's arms, his kisses. He loved her, she loved him. He was the only one who understood, the only one who could bring beauty from her pain.

She watched in disgust as Tenionia cried over losing her. What did that little bitch care? She was not too far gone, the brat had done nothing to help her. No one but Amon had. She turned on her heel sharply. She would have her revenge, her followers were still waiting in the dark. She would just have to wait a while, but that was fine.

She had waited for years for someone to finally love her.

Yeesh that took an hour to write. Please review!