Explanatory A/N: Where do I start? Leon explains himself and his family situation in the story. Forget Jenova. Nibelheim never happened. First Class Zack married Cadet Cloud as soon as "Jailbait" became legal. General Sephiroth is sane, with two younger brothers, Yazoo and Riku. Riku lives at home with their father, Vincent Valentine and stepfather Captain Cid. Think of this as my version of a High School AU, because this old lady don't do high school.

Fandom AU Crossover: Final Fantasy 7 - Kingdom Hearts

Summary: Leon wishes to be the best he can be. Sephiroth will make sure of it.

Pairings: Sephiroth/Leon, Zack/Cloud, Reno/Yazoo, Mentioned Cid/Vin

Warnings: Shonen-Ai, AU, OOC, Cursing, Ultimate-Seme Sephiroth, Zack being Zack, Sub-In-Training Leon, No. 1 Host Yazoo, Mommy Cloud, FF7 and KH characters run amok, MPREG (Blame the Mako. It's there. It's everywhere!)

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this fan fiction.

The Midgar Host Club

XXX

Sephiroth gracefully took his seat in the specially assigned VIP booth, located in a roped off area of The Midgar Host Club and Bar. "Zackary. This is not my idea of a restful evening."

Bouncing to the thumping dance music, Zack wheeled around. "Come on, Seph! This is my first night out in ages. Cloud made me swear to give him, and baby chocobo, at least two hours of uninterrupted sleep. Yazoo will make sure nobody bothers you, and there's this new guy he wants to hide back here with us."

Sephiroth raised an eyebrow. "Hide?"

Grinning, Zack flopped down in the booth, next to his best friend. "Yaz says the kid's fresh out of the infantry. Honorable discharge because of a bum hand. Poor newbie follows orders to the letter, even the stupid ones. Little brother's scared he'll get eaten alive on the dance floor."

Since the pair were alone, Sephiroth allowed himself a roll of the eyes. "And you volunteered me as his savior. If you weren't my best friend-"

Zack glomped Sephiroth hard, laying a spiky head on his shoulder. "Buuuut I aaaaam, and you love me. So brighten up, Buttercup, or you'll scare the kid to death."

Grumbling, Sephiroth shoved Zack off and patted his hair down. "This fledgling host better be a quiet one. The last one my beloved brother introduced me to was more flaming than Genesis."

Shock actually made Zack sit still for a moment. "I didn't think that was possible."

Sephiroth squinted from the multi-colored strobe lights hurting his enhanced eyes. "Neither did I, friend. Neither did I."

XXX

Leon fidgeted in the dressing room, wrapping his arms around his waist. "Can't I button up at least two buttons? I'm cold and these leather pants ride down so low. I think my butt's showing every time I sit down."

Smirking, Yazoo pushed Leon into a chair in front of a mirror. "That's the idea, Silly. You're not an infantryman anymore. You're a fabulous pagan god destined for greatness. Remember! Positive thinking equals positive results."

Leon pouted at his own reflection. Taking Yazoo's sage advice, he had allowed his brunet hair to grow past his shoulders. Old white t-shirts and jeans were out. Deep green velvet open-waist shirts and dark brown leather pants were in. He even surrendered to the eyeliner and lip gloss. There was just one huge problem. "This damned scar! Nothing hides it and I know it turns off a lot of the clientèle. The other hosts are right, Yazoo. I should go back home. If I screw up with your brother, I'm finished."

Embracing Leon's shoulders, Yazoo laid his cheek on top of his protégé's head. "The rest of the hosts are catty bitches, who wish they could look half as pretty as you do on their worst day. As for the clientèle, all the customers are SOLDIER, Turks, or Shinra Elite. I've found scars turn them on immensely."

Leon lowered an uncertain gaze. "Yazoo? Did you warn Sephiroth about my talking problem? I know he's First Class. He can do what he wants. But the last client hit me so hard, when I couldn't think of anything to say. I'm not enhanced. If it wasn't for Reno, and his Cure Materia, I don't know what I would have done."

Yazoo's lips thinned with remembered anger. "I don't need to warn him, Leon. My brother appreciates a companion who can be still and listen. As for that Third Class loser, he will not be returning. Reno understands violence against my friends unnerves me. He took care of the problem personally."

With a smile, Leon hugged the arm wrapped around his shoulders. "Friends?"

Yazoo responded with a saucy smile back. "Absolutely."

XXX

Gazing at his younger kimono-wearing sibling, Sephiroth's lip curled. "Father always wanted a girl. I should let him know his wish was granted behind his back."

Yazoo scowled at his big brother, while gracing Zack with a big hug. "Don't you dare! I finally got him to agree to send Riku to the Shinra School for Boys. He only relented when I swore Riku would stay with me, under your direct supervision. If Father had his way, we'd all be hiding under his cape back in Rocket Town."

For a rare instance, Sephiroth's visage softened. "You've talked to him? He was so upset, when I was deployed to Wutai. Riku called me crying, because he wandered off on his own again. It took the Captain a week to find him."

Yazoo played with his glass of wine. "Cid is a coarse and tactless individual, but he understands Father's strange ways, and knows how to deal with them. Riku doesn't want to leave Father alone, but we both agree it's for the best. Cid can watch over Father full-time, and Riku can focus on finishing school."

Listening to the music, Zack shimmied in place. "What does Reno think of the silver-haired midget cock-blocker coming to town?"

Yazoo slammed his fist onto the table. "Like I care! Vile Turk! I banned him from my presence for two weeks for that remark. One thing is for damned sure. He's never making fun of Riku again."

Sephiroth chuckled. "Yazoo, is there anything else you wish to tell me?"

Yazoo exhaled. "I can't issue an ultimatum if Reno's not here. Since he's working undercover, I don't know when he'll be back."

Reaching across the table, Sephiroth unclenched Yazoo's fist, and held his hand. "Whatever Reno's answer may be, I am the first person you call. Understand, Little Brother?"

Tears filling his eyes, Yazoo shook his head up-and-down. "Don't worry, Big Brother. I won't break like Father did. I promise."

Zack was about to perform the victory dance of brotherly love, when he felt a tentative nudge to his shoulder. Whirling around, he stared down into nervous blue-grey eyes. "Hello, Nurse!"

XXX

Laughing, Yazoo pulled a stumbling Leon to the booth. "Don't mind Zack. He's fooled everyone into believing he's a hard-as-nails First Class SOLDIER, when he's actually an overgrown Puppy."

Sitting down next to Yazoo, Leon turned back to Zack. "Zack? As in Zack Fair? My name's Leon. You don't know me, but I'm in a book reading club with your spouse, Cloud. He couldn't make the last meeting, because the baby was sick. I hope everything's better now."

Perplexed, Zack scratched the back of his head. "Cloud reads?"

Leon frowned. "Yes, Sir. He told me his love of books began because his mother was a schoolteacher."

Zack stared off into space. "Mrs. Strife was a schoolteacher?"

Yazoo giggled. "Zack, do you do anything with Cloud but try to make more babies?"

Turning in place, Zack abandoned himself to the music. "Nah. Spiky's the thinker in our family. I just earn the gil. We're both hoping the kids take after him."

"Your name is Leon? Strange. It does not seem to suit you."

Turning back, Leon's eyes met a glowing gaze of intense emerald green. "Actually, it's Squall Leonhart. The owner thought Leon suited me better. I also go to college, so I would rather work under a pseudonym."

Sensing a magical moment happening, Yazoo surreptitiously inched out of the cubicle to go dance with Zack.

Sephiroth eased forward to get a better look at the compact man seated across from him. "Zackary informed me you had been honorably discharged. Why are you working here? Shinra has a college funding program set-up for ex-infantrymen."

Leon usually clammed up, when people delved into his personal life, but the General seemed genuinely interested. "I did qualify for the program, but I used the funds to help my father send my twin brothers, Sora and Roxas, to the Shinra School for Boys. They receive a much better education there than they ever could in Winhill."

Sephiroth continued to stare. Inhaling Leon's scent, he unconsciously recorded the smell into his memory. "Shinra School for Boys? My little brother, Riku, shall be attending next semester, perhaps he will meet your brothers."

Leon's face lit up with a transcendent smile. "Oh, that would be nice. Reno's brother, Axel, attends also. Sora says he's okay, but Roxas says Axel pesters him worse than Reno bothers Yazoo. Maybe Riku will be a better influence."

Sephiroth tilted his head. "Tell me, Squall. Does Sora look like you?"

Leon's forehead furrowed with confusion. "The name's Leon. Yes, Sora does take after me, but I'm afraid he's much more naïve. I'm lucky Roxas is with him."

Sephiroth allowed himself a small smile. "I'm not sure about influence, but I can guarantee Riku will get along with Sora, like a house on fire."

Blush growing, at seeing Sephiroth's smile, Leon lowered his head. "Sounds good. I guess."

Out of the corner of his eye, Leon sensed a black object venture near. Glancing up, his eyes widened to see Sephiroth standing and holding a gloved hand out for him to take. "Zackary and I will have to leave soon, since his body goes into shock without a steady dose of Cloud. Please allow me the honor of one dance before I go."

Slack-jawed, Leon limply grasped Sephiroth's hand. To his embarrassment, he let out a plaintive mewl when Sephiroth yanked his body into strong arms. Feeling his blush grow hotter, he noticed his feet swinging helplessly in the air. "General? I really can't dance with you, when my feet don't touch the floor."

Sephiroth positioned Leon's head against his shoulder. "Call me Sephiroth, Squall. Place your reliance in me. I shall dance for the both of us."

Leon pouted, but wrapped arms and legs tight around Sephiroth's lean torso. "Okay, but the name's Leon."

Basking in his new love's embrace, Sephiroth swayed to the music. His father always worried he would never find a mate. He couldn't wait to call Vincent with the good news. "Of course, Squall."

Completely forgotten, Zack and Yazoo danced with glee.

Flipping out his cell phone, Zack called up his Chocobo. He grinned to hear his beloved's extremely pissed-off voice. "I finally got the baby to sleep. If he wakes up, don't bother coming home."

Zack whispered into the cell. "Sorry, Spiky, but I know you would have killed me, if I didn't show you this."

As stealthy as he could, Zack held up the phone, so Cloud could get a birds-eye view. He sniggered, hearing Cloud's excited reaction. "Leon! Holy fuck! He doesn't stand a chance! I'm going to have to attend the Book Club in his place. Sephiroth's going to chain him to his bed."

Zack brought the cell back to his ear. "Come on, Babe. Leon may be ex-infantry, but I bet he doesn't follow every order to the letter."

Cloud scoffed. "Zack, do you remember what I was like when you first met me? Leon's five times worse."

Zack paled, watching Sephiroth grab tight hold of Leon's innocent butt cheeks. "Aw crap. Poor kid's gonna get eaten alive."

Cloud released a sigh into the phone. "Hopefully, I can get the last meeting's notes, before Sephiroth locks him up for good."

Zack smiled, seeing Leon attempt to wiggle out of Sephiroth's arms, only making the General hold on tighter. "So I hear you read. Huh?"

On the other end, Cloud covered his eyes with his hand. "Yes, Zack. I read."

Zack hummed, hearing Yazoo giggle, while Sephiroth covered Leon's red face with ardent kisses. "I didn't know Ma was a schoolteacher. It explains why she smacked me with a ruler the last time we visited."

Cloud sank back on the couch. "I told you all this when we first met. Gods, I hope the baby doesn't have your attention span."

Zack shrugged, noticing Leon had given up trying to escape Sephiroth's clutches, and nodded listlessly to the General's enthusiastic plans for their future life together. "No worries, Spiky. He's good-looking. When you're good-looking, life takes care of itself."

Cloud glared at the cell phone. "I am so locking you out tonight."

Zack grinned at the nightly challenge. "Triple lock it, Baby. I'll still get in. I always do."

Cloud growled, before hanging up the phone. "I should never have allowed you to hang around Reno."

Pocketing the cell phone, Zack's grin became an all-out smirk, while he sauntered towards the still swaying couple. "Heh. I love marriage. It beats simulated missions any day."