all the pain and truth I wear like a battle wound (this is a story that I have never told)
By: AndiKaneUnderwood
AU: Alpha/Beta/Omega, Hybrid, Canon Divergence
As you know, in my previous story for this series, I divert from canon. Kurt does not get back together with Blaine in this one and he gets accepted into NYADA on the first audition (because I'm pissed that woman didn't take him the first time). Blaine also transfers back to Dalton (where the Warblers will not take him back). Please see my previous works for more designations.
Jade Puckermen: Alpha (sports capabilities, guitar playing), Dragon Hybrid(1) (mossy green glow)
Unique Adams: Alpha (no quirk), Buffalo Hybrid (dark orange glow)
Marley Rose: Omega (empathy, compassion, and songwriting skills), Turtle Hybrid (hazel green glow)
Ryder Lynn: Omega (magical capabilities), Unicorn Hybrid (silver glow)
After hearing Ryder's admission to the group and Artie and Sam's reaction to it, Finn couldn't help but be disgusted with his friends.
How could they think this was okay? Had they learned nothing from previous years?
So, as Ryder sniffled and smiled broken, saying it didn't matter, Finn pulled out his phone and shot off a text to his brother.
Ryder would need support. More than his friends could provide. And Finn knew exactly who could give Ryder that support.
So, Finn waited for Glee club to end and snagged Ryder's sleeve.
"Hold up a second, Ryder," Finn said softly, gently pulling the younger away from the rest of the students.
Ryder nodded, staying by Finn's side until the other kids had filed out of the room.
When it was just the two of them left, Ryder opened his mouth to say something, then closed it, and opened it again, "Why did you have me stay behind?"
Finn, who'd been texting someone on his phone, looked up and smiled goofily at Ryder. "I want you to meet someone, Ryder."
Ryder was left even more confused until he heard a door open and soft footsteps coming right to the Glee room.
And suddenly, in walked a man with gelled back brunette hair, porcelain skin, and bright blue-green-grey eyes. He was wearing a pale purple dress shirt with the buttons at the top left open, exposing the darker purple ascot (and the Bond Mark peeking out from underneath), and black pants with a belt keeping them from slipping down his legs.
The man ducked in quickly and quietly, setting down a messenger bag with a huff.
"Kurt!" Finn called brightly, and the man looked up, eyes settling on the teacher.
The man's face lit up entirely and he smiled as Finn wrapped him a hug, "Finn!"
And Ryder startled, suddenly he knew who this must be.
He'd heard Finn speaking on the phone to his friends in New York, asking how Kurt was, if Kurt was okay.
He'd heard Artie, Tina, Sam, Unique, and Brittany talk about a person named Kurt; how he was a kind person, how he was going off to college, how sad it was that Blaine had 'done what he'd done'. Ryder had wondered then if 'Blaine' had killed someone.
He'd never met Blaine, the other had transferred back to his previous school in Ryder's freshman year, long before Ryder had decided to join the New Directions, but he knew he didn't like Blaine. Because anyone who cheated on their significant other was an asshole in Ryder's book.
So, it was with that in mind that he stepped forward to remind Finn that he was still here.
Finn didn't notice him, but Kurt's eyes flashed to Ryder and he smiled again, "Finn, will you introduce me to this young man?"
Finn pulled back with a chuckled, "Yeah. Ryder, c'mere." He gestured Ryder over and placed a gentle and warm hand on his shoulder. "Ryder, this is my little brother, Kurt Hummel. Kurt, this is Ryder Lynn. He's the one I text you about."
Kurt nodded and offered his hand to the younger boy. "It's wonderful to meet you, Ryder. Finn's told me a lot about you and the others that joined this year. You're Omega, right?"
Ryder flushed and nodded, taking Kurt's hand, "Yeah."
Kurt hummed and his eyes flashed a brilliant gold. "Great. I'd like to get to know you a little more if you don't mind. Hungry?" he asked.
Ryder nodded as his stomach grumbled and he flushed further, "Yes, please."
Kurt smiled brighter and clapped his hands together, "Wonderful. Come on, I know a great place just outside of town. Make sure you tell your parents, okay?"
Kurt began leading Ryder out the door, grabbing his messenger bag as he did and calling to Finn. "We'll catch up later, Finn, okay?"
Finn nodded and waved, "See you at home, little brother."
In the hallway, Ryder asked, "I thought Finn was younger than you."
Kurt huffed out a laugh and nodded, "He is(2), but I let him call me younger. It makes him feel better about some things that happened in the past. And who am I to deny him what comforts him."
Ryder nodded, "You're pretty smart."
Kurt winked, "Just don't go spreading that secret, I'd never have another moment to myself."
Glee~Glee~Glee
Kurt led Ryder out to his car, which was almost as bright as Kurt was, and let him climb into the passenger seat.
While Kurt was putting his bag in the backseats, Ryder texted his parents that he'd be late, but he was safe and with a friend.
As Kurt climbed into the driver's side and started the car, Ryder noticed a Bluetooth option.
"You wanna play some music?" Kurt asked, noticing Ryder's attention shift.
"Uh, sure?" Ryder replied, offering his phone for Kurt to connect it to his car.
Kurt made fast work of connecting his phone and handing it back. "Play something good," Kurt joked, putting the car in reverse and backing out of the school parking lot.
Ryder wasn't much for classical, which he knew Kurt liked from when Finn took Ryder along on a shopping trip for Christmas, but he did have some pop songs and he figured why not.
So, he clicked '50 Ways to Say Goodbye' and was surprised to find Kurt chuckling and reaching over to turn up the volume on his radio. "Excellent choice."
20 minutes and six songs later, Kurt pulled up outside a small diner and turned off the car. "Here we are."
Ryder disconnected his phone and began getting out of the car.
They were seated next to a window, but in full view of every exit and unlocked door, something Ryder was grateful for. Especially after the scare with the gunshots nearly a week ago.
"I thought you'd like this place. It's very quiet and calm. My Dad used to take me here when I was younger." Kurt informed him.
The waitress came over and took their orders. Kurt secured a salad and a slice of pie, Ryder decided on a chicken sandwich and a milkshake.
"Healthy eating, not something I'd expect from a sophomore." Kurt hummed softly, swirling his straw around his drink.
Ryder smiled, "Gotta keep the carbs up, football season starts soon."
Kurt startled, then smiled. "I'd heard that they'd finally managed to unite athletes and other groups, but I didn't believe it."
Ryder tilted his head, "Why?"
Kurt chuckled, "Well when I was in Glee club, we weren't popular at all. Slushies to the face, knocked into lockers, you name it, the jocks had done it. And I was their favorite punching bag. So, when Mr. Shue started Glee club, you can imagine a lot of people weren't happy. The jocks, specifically the football players, especially, since their star player decided to join as well."
"Who was their star player?" Ryder asked as the food was placed down and he smiled in thanks at the waitress.
"Let me know if you need anything else, okay?" the waitress smiled as she left.
Kurt hummed and began picking through the salad. "Finn was their star player, Ryder."
Ryder's eyes went comically wide, "Wait, seriously?"
The older laughed, "Yes, seriously. How do you think he came to be an assistant teacher with that build? Surely you recognized him as a sports player?"
Ryder nodded, "Well sure, but I thought he'd stopped when he joined Glee, he always talked about football with a sad look."
Kurt hummed and nodded, "Yes, that would be because of me."
Ryder's eyes sparked with curiosity and he could feel the faint silver glow that began to show. "How?"
"Well, a few years before we joined Glee club, his mother met my father and they began a relationship. When we met, I knew immediately he was my SoulMate. I brought this fact up to him and he didn't take it well. He was very uneasy around me and his football friends picked up on that and began to bully me something awful, which carried all the way up until junior year when I transferred to Dalton prep. He's always felt guilty about that so football, while something he loves to do, is a very hard topic for him because of the memories connected to it." Kurt explained in between bites of his food.
Ryder wondered what Kurt meant by SoulMates.
When asked, Kurt replied, "Well, he and I are SoulMates. You know what those are, right?"
Ryder nodded, Kurt turned back to his food and hummed again, "Platonic SoulMates work kind of the same way, just without the sexual component or attraction to each other. Finn, as I'm sure you've seen, is entirely straight. I am not. I wanted him in my life regardless, so I decided that if I was only ever to be his friend, I'd be happy with that. A few weeks later, I was in the library and came across a book about SoulMates. When I read it, I found something called 'Protection Claiming'. I read through it and when I understood, I brought it up with Finn.
"He eventually agreed and Marked me. The next week, I Marked him in return. It's been that way ever since." Kurt finished off his salad and started on the pie, devouring it with a passion Ryder had thought only older fat men had.
Ryder soon finished his food as well and Kurt paid the check, despite Ryder's attempts to give him money.
"Put away your wallet, Ryder. This is a gift." Kurt scolded with a smile.
Ryder hesitated, then nodded, putting his wallet and reaching instead for his cellphone, which buzzed with a text from Jade.
Where'd you go, Ry? Marley's worried.
Ryder smiled as he replied that he was fine and with a friend, not to expect him back until that night.
Kurt set a hand on his shoulder and smiled. "Walk with me, I want to talk about something Finn told me."
Ryder's blood ran cold and he froze up, "He didn't..."
Kurt gently took Ryder's hand, "It's okay, Ryder. I just want to talk."
Ryder gulped, then nodded. "Okay," he whispered.
Glee~Glee~Glee
Kurt led Ryder out towards the forest, where cell signals where few and far between, and for this, Ryder was also grateful. This talk wasn't something he wanted to participate in, much less have others know about.
Kurt sighed as he tilted his head back, absorbing the sun's rays. "I understand this isn't a conversation that will be easy for you, Ryder. Please know that I'm here to listen and offer my support to you. I understand a thing or two about molestation and rape, Ryder. Maybe more than you'll ever know."
Ryder's eyes filled with tears as he nodded and swallowed back a sob. "Uh, you are right about it being not-easy. Um, I've never told anyone other than the Glee club and a catfisher online."
If the last part surprised Kurt, he didn't let it show, but he did turn back to face Ryder.
Ryder sighed, "I was 11, I'd just presented a few months ago and my babysitter was an Alpha. My parents were hesitant to leave their only son with an Alpha when he'd only presented a few months ago, but she assured them that she'd be able to control herself so they left." Ryder paused, a few tears slipping down his cheeks and he wiped them away angrily.
"I got into the shower that night and didn't think anything was going to be wrong. She came in with no warning. I didn't even hear the door open, she was just suddenly there. She- uh... She t-touched..." Ryder wrapped his arms around his middle and back away a step, suddenly aware he was shaking and tears were cascading down his cheeks.
Kurt understood, "It's okay, Ryder. You don't have to keep going."
Ryder shook his head, "When she'd gotten what she wanted, she leaned in close and told me not to tell anyone. I wasn't old enough to understand what she'd done, but I knew she was wrong. I was mortified. I was so scared, I didn't tell a soul for four fucking years."
Kurt made a pained sound in the back of his throat and Ryder saw tears in his eyes too.
"I-I told the others in Glee club. Most of them took it okay, but..." Ryder hesitated again, not wanting Kurt to be upset with his friends, but the steel-edged gleam in his eyes said that Kurt would probably find out anyway, so he continued on. "Artie and Sam didn't exactly understand."
Kurt froze up, "What?" he whispered.
Ryder nodded, "They think it's an honor mark."
Kurt growled, low and deadly, then reeled himself in and took a single step forward. "Is it okay if I give you a hug?"
Ryder nodded and Kurt gently wrapped his arms around the younger boy.
Ryder felt warm and safe and his shaking and tears slowly went away.
"It's okay, Ryder. You're going to be okay, I promise." Kurt murmured.
Ryder wasn't sure why this still tore him up so much, it happened four years ago, but in that moment he understood that Kurt was in his corner.
And that meant a lot more than he'd ever let on.
Glee~Glee~Glee
After the talk, Kurt took Ryder home and gave the younger Omega his number for if he ever needed to talk.
Ryder woke up the next morning feeling much better than he had in a long, long time.
Mr. Shue had called for a Saturday Glee practice, wanting to solidify their set list and make sure everyone was good with Outcasts, so Ryder got up and got dressed, making sure to pull on long sleeves because it was chilly that morning.
His mother gave him a ride and Jade was waiting at the front door when he got there.
Jade gently kissed his temple and smiled brightly, hair pulled over one shoulder. "Have a nice afternoon with Finn's brother?"
Ryder looked at her curiously, "How'd you know who I was with?"
Jade pulled up a picture on Facebook that Ryder and Kurt had taken before Ryder left the car to go home.
"To commemorate the occasion of finding a new friend." Kurt had said.
Ryder flushed pink and nodded, "Right."
Jake laughed and they walked into the school, heading for Glee practice.
Practice went pretty well, Kurt had stuck around to help out where he could. He and Finn made a good team to encourage the kids to be their best.
Ryder got some good advice from Kurt.
"You do well with complex songs, Ryder, and I've heard how well you can sing. Complex works well for a good opening number, but it's the emotional songs that really get them to look at you and say 'now there's a winning group'. Okay?"
So, Ryder asked Mr. Shue if he could propose a song.
Mr. Shue had nodded, "Why don't you perform it and we'll see how the others like it, okay?"
So, Ryder performed a song he'd heard on the radio. And he put every emotion he had into the song.
Every feeling, every tear, every broken part of him came pouring out into the lyrics of the song he'd chosen.
At the end, he looked up and Kurt was crying as he applauded his new friend with a smile on his face.
Ryder smiled, feeling for the first time in a while that he would be okay.
'Cause all the pain and the truth, I wear like a battle wound. So ashamed, so confused, I'm not broken or bruised. 'Cause now I'm a warrior, now I've got thicker skin. I'm a warrior, I'm stronger than I've ever been. And my armor is made of steel, you can't get in. I'm a warrior and you can never hurt me again.
"Maybe this bad thing happened to me, but it didn't break me. No, I'm not broken or bruised anymore. I'm a warrior. I'm stronger from this, my armor is stronger now. She can't ever hurt me again."
Okay, that was a bunch of emotions I needed to get out. So, this is my feeling like Kurt should've been called in to help with the kids more because he was also a Glee club graduate. I chose this specific moment because I needed someone to tell Ryder that he'd be okay, and as much as I like Kitty, she's not my favorite. I just needed this, okay?
(1) Yes, dragon. Jade Puckerman will by one of the only Dragon Hybrids to be recorded in human history. The same goes for Ryder, who is a unicorn Hybrid.
(2) This is literally the only story I'll address this as canon in. I don't believe that Kurt is one of the oldest members. I don't think Blaine is younger than him. I don't think Finn is younger than Kurt. I personally believe that Kurt was taking advanced classes because of his intelligence. Because Blaine being so high up in the Warblers as a sophomore? No, don't think so.
Also, unmentioned is that Kurt had a new friendship with Sebastian in this story. Sebastian presents a few months after he meets Klaine in the bar, he's in the same SoulMate boat as Kurt and they will eventually begin a relationship.