As we shuffle along wordlessly toward the village center with our heads looking down, all that can be heard is the faint sound of crunching snow. The dark sky, usually so full of jubilant stars, looks dimmer and gloomier than usual.

And then, there it is.

The platform.

There is a collective nervous exhale as we're ushered up the stairs like prisoners to the gallows. We line up alphabetically and stand shoulder to shoulder, looking out at the audience.

Four fires, one at each corner, illuminate the stage, but they make it difficult to see beyond them. I know my family is sitting out there somewhere and I desperately try to find them. After a quick scan, I know it is pointless. Besides, today is not about family.

I hear floorboards creaking and glance to my right, where Chief Sokka approaches. He takes a step in front of us all and begins his speech.

"Today, we honor the young men and women that stand before us."

I've listened to this speech for years, but always from the other side. Somehow, even though I know the words are the same, they feel different.

"Let us congratulate them on reaching this important milestone in their lives."

By that, of course, he means that we're all eighteen. The real milestone is yet to come.

The chief reads a list of names. There are just over twenty of us. Kiana's name is read first and I want to reach out and give her had a squeeze, but it seems frozen to my side.

Next, of course is my name. All those years in the audience, I never understood why the people standing up here all looked so scared. It makes sense now.

"Tomorrow," Chief Sokka continues, "they begin the first chapter of their adult lives.

"For some, that means a return. But others will touch the snow for the last time."

Usually only about four people transfer to different nations, and of those, it's mostly nonbenders. Still, benders and nonbenders alike all pause in this moment to wonder if the Chief is talking about them.

"No matter what happens, however, we know that here we have raised them well."

There's always a plea for us to stay. From the day we learned about the test, standing here in this square nearly ten years ago, they've always told us one thing: you cannot change the results. But with the population still recovering from the Fire Nation raids during the war, they always hope that we'll stay.

"And with the principles of the Southern Water Tribe in their hearts, these fine young men and women will be a positive force of change."

For water is the element of change, I think.

"For water is the element of change."

And we trust them to choose the right paths.

"And we trust them to choose the right paths."

Even if it means leaving everything behind?

"Even if it means leaving everything behind."

I try to look out beyond the stage again, but the light from the fire makes it impossible to see. But this isn't about them, I remind myself.

"So tonight let us celebrate their lives here and wish them well wherever they end up."

This final statement is met with resounding applause.

We are ushered to a large tent illuminated by several tall lanterns. There is a table with traditional water tribe food. The smells alone make me want to stay here, regardless of what any test says. No one would ever know if I went against my results.

A minute later, I hate myself for cursing the test. My parents themselves helped design it, so I of all people should be in support of it and should trust what the result it gives.

Thought I'm not sure if I could ever support something that tells you where you're supposed to belong.

Suddenly, I feel someone jumping on my back. Over my shoulder, I see a mess of curls as dark as the winter sky. "Izumi!" I say. She hops down and I give her a hug. "Did you like the ceremony?"

She rolls her eyes. "I liked it about as much as I liked it last year. And the year before that. And the year before that. And the–"

"Hey, I get it," I say, holding up my hands. "Trust me, it's no more fun when you're standing up there."

As we get in line for the food, the rest of my family catches up to Izumi and me. Lu Ten gives me a hug, too, but his is more sorrowful than my sister's, like he's gripping onto something for the last time.

"You worry too much," I whisper when he refuses to let go.

He looks down at me with big blue eyes. When did he get so big? I wonder. How did I let so much time go by?

My thoughts are interrupted by the sound of drums. A group of people start playing music, and then the celebration really begins. With all of the bodies under the tent, it quickly warms up, but not enough to make me feel comfortable in the thin dress I'm wearing. I wish it wasn't necessary to get dressed up, but it's the tradition. Maybe halfway through I can sneak out to our igloo and grab my heavy parka.

I've never been one for dancing, so I sit along the edge and watch everyone else and try to soak up as much of the energy as I can.

Maybe I won't have to leave. Maybe I'll take the test and it will send me right back here. Maybe I'll stay and raise kids of my own and watch them go through the same agony I'm feeling right now.

Or maybe I won't.

My mom stops by and sits next to me on the bench.

"Nervous?" she asks.

I shrug. She knows what it means and wraps an arm around my shoulder.

"Kya-la, no matter where you end up, you'll always be my daughter and I'll always be proud of you."

I want to say so much, but at the same time I want to say nothing at all, so I just nod.

She gets up and pulls my brother into dancing. He looks miserable and dances as clumsily as a lame penguin. I laugh at him. He catches me doing so and runs over to drag me into the center of the floor, where Izumi and Mom follow. I wish my father were here.

The music picks up and suddenly I'm moving faster and actually enjoying myself. It gets so warm that I forget about the parka and get lost instead in the music and the light. I don't know how long I'm there dancing with them, but when I catch a glimpse of Kiana, all my movement slows to a halt as I remember the real reason we're here.

All of this is just a distraction from the reality of tomorrow.

A/N:

Thank you so much for reading this! I had previously published two chapters of this story, but they didn't sit quite right with me and decided to take a different approach. I've had this idea floating around in my head for a while, but didn't exactly know how to get it out there. So I apologize if you're re-reading this, but I really think (and hope) that you'll like this version better. This is my first time doing this, so reviews are greatly appreciated! Thanks!