Disclaimer: The following story is a fan-base parody; any characters present are not owned nor claimed ownership by the writer in current. These characters, situations and plots are being borrowed for the entertainment of viewers like you. If this Author claims ownership of these characters, the thick finger of the law will be up his ass.
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WARNING: This is a concept draft; English IS NOT my first language so you might find some spell errors in it. Please cut me some slack, I made the best I could, given that I do not posses trusted beta testers.
Author's Side Note: The characters in this story are going through the "Tsubasa chronicles effect"; so mayor OOC-ness will be present. If you don't know what the "Tsubasa Chronicles effect" is; go to my profile and there will be a brief explanation.
Also this parody was made for my forum topic of "What hasn't Ranma been crossed with". Enjoy~
Electrowave girl I'm not, Youthful boy I am
By: Hirrayami Otoni
Cathegory: Romantic Comedy
Mode: Tryout
X month X day X yeah, I found myself in one of those days where I wonder what would be of my life. As I stand in front of the train stop waiting for my train to arrive for the start of my new life I ponder on how I ended up here to begin with.
But first things firsts; my name is Tendoh Akane and I am a healthy sixteen year old Japanese girl on my way to being a true lady. Let me explain, my mother died when I was really young so the only role model I had were my older sisters and that didn't help much. I am what you call a tomboy, even if I hate to admit it, but I still like girly stuff.
The problem was that in my freshman years of high school, this loon upperclassman became obsessed with me, more for a pain in the ass that I was already 'popular' with the boys (brr) in school… he declared that no one should date me unless they defeat me in combat… boys… they are so… uff! It makes me so mad!
Either way I fought my way through school in that first year, did I ever mention that I come from a line of martial artists? I am really good at it too! Anyways; it seems the school staff got enough of it given that my last fight, if you ever call me beating the hell out of them all a fight, I really made a huge damage on all boys in school and got expelled. Hey! Don't look at me like that! It was their fault! They had it for being such perverts!
Sigh… Well my oldest sister Kasumi scolded me bad… so she sent me on a task to become a 'proper lady'; ah come on, I already am a proper lady! One that doesn't let her self be manhandled by boys!
Going back to topic, I am currently in a quest for lady hood, so to accomplish this my oldest sister sent me to live with a family that has been friends with mine for years, even before I was born. I am supposed to enroll in a new school and get guidance from a proper lady like the one I am going to live with.
Well as I tell you this, my train just arrived so I have to board before I loose it. Lets see, I should put this here and there.
After finishing setting my belongings in the raft I sat down in one of the confy chairs and took out my music player. Music always made me relax; the train began to move after all passengers sat down, ah such a nice view outside.
Where was I? Ah yes, I am now to live with the family friends. So in this quest I set myself a chart with points on Lady hood.
Hours passed and I even fell asleep. Jerked awake by the sudden stop I realized that the train arrived at Azabu Juuban in the Minato Ward. Taking my things I prepared to get off the train. If I remembered correctly Kasumi Neechan gave me a picture of the lady that was supposed to pick me up.
Searching my things I find the picture and take a look. In there was a picture of my parents and another couple, I assume the lady in the picture besides my mother is the one I am expecting. She looks so pretty and proper… although her dark red hair is so uncommon for a Japanese woman. But never the less she is pretty. What was her name again? Saotome Nodoka I believe.
"Akane chan?" Speaking of which… I lowered the picture to see the lady I spoke of a couple of yards away. She stood there tall and proud, a proper lady with a smile of a perfect yamato nadeshiko. I quickly bowed to her in respect and greeting; "Yes, I am Tendoh Akane. You are Saotome Nodoka san I believe? I'll be in your care." Properly lady greeting plus five points~
Said lady raised her sleeved hand to hide a giggle from her red lips. I kind of felt stupid myself…
"There is no need to formalities, please feel free to call me Aunty Nodoka." The lady said as she smiled at me. I smiled back and nodded.
Minutes later we took a taxi to her home. Saotome san, er I mean AUNTY Nodoka, took at glance at me and with a smile she asked; "How was your trip?" I answered back; "It was ok. Although a bit boring so I kind of fell asleep."
A slight frown appeared on the lady's face; "Akane chan?" I got a bit worried by her reaction; "Its not proper of a lady to fall asleep in a train and leave herself open and vulnerable." Lady hood points minus two.
I sighed; this is going to be a long day… Sometime later, after traffic, we arrived at her house. It was a nice normal Japanese home and a beautiful garden surrounding it. Lovely… "Welcome to the Saotome Household." I snapped off my reverie after hearing her welcome to her household. I smiled back; "Thank you for having me."
Following her steps, I waited for the elder woman to open the door that will give access to the inside of the house. "Feel free to leave your things at the entrance hall while I help you set a room." She said as she opens the door. I nod to her in affirmation and went inside.
The inside was no different from the outside. A traditional Japanese home with beautiful craftsmanship and furniture plus a red-haired girl running towards us, wait is that a sailor moon costume!?
"Halt there invaders! I am the guardian of Love and Justice! Magical girl guardian of this home and will not allow you evil doers to enter this sacred place and corrupt it!" Exclaimed the girl as I stood there with my mouth open and eyes wide…
I took a glance towards aunt Nodoka and I see her acting like no one was there as she turns at me with a smile; "What do you think of the house? Lovely isn't it? Wait until you see the room I selected for you!" she giggled and walked past the red head as if she was not there. Pardon my words of unladylike but… WHAT THE FUCK!
As I continue cursing my resent lost of lady points I heard the girl continue; "So ignoring me aren't you!? I swear on love and justice that I will get rid of you evil doers!"
"Erm… annou…" I begin, "Aunt Nodoka…"
"Yes dear?"
"Who is this?"
"Who's who dear?" she replied with a blink.
I believe my face's expression right now was showing a sign as if she grew another head… Is this lady for real? I point my finger at the red haired girl. "Who is THAT girl?"
"What girl dear? I see no girl there. Oh my I believe it will be dinner time soon so if you excuse me." And she left… I can't believe this… My eyes turn back to the… weird girl… said girl was smirking at me.
"I see now!" she said,
"Excuse me?"
"She left her familiar to fight me! Oh clever clever!" She said pointing some kind of baton at me.
"I beg your pardon?"
"You will perish along with that evil witch!"
"Who the hell… are you?"
Said girl made a pose… oh god… "I am the light of hope! The kindness of men! The water that pours in the flowers! –"Get to the point"- The… hey! I wasn't finish! Don't interrupt me!" she flaps her mini skirt and glares at me; "I am a boy who turns into a magical girl of justice!"
"Ah I see…" Well this does it, she is a complete nu… wait did she say she was a boy!? Impossible, She looks too petite and feminine to… hmm….
"Uhm.. annou… would you please stop groping my breasts?" I blushed furiously as I found myself grabbing the girl that claims to be a magical girl's boobs. "Ah, sorry!" I shake my head and feel my temper raise again, "But boy my ass! I see you are a girl! A crazy one none the less!"
Said girl jumps back guarding her bosom; "I see! Alas I didn't expect the familiar of that witch to be such a pervert!"
"EXCUSE ME!?"
"None the less! I will defeat you and that witch! And yes! I am indeed a boy with magical girl powers! But I will not show my true identity to one pervert such as you!"
"I AM NOT A PERVERT!" I was about to kick this girl's ass when I heard the scolding tone of aunty Saotome. "Akane chan?"
I stopped mid-tracks; "Eh? Yes Aunt Nodoka?"
"Is not proper of a lady to speak to herself, yet argue with herself. Now come, dinner will be ready soon and you need to take a bath." She said as I see a tower on her hands. "It's been a long day so relax and get clean before dinner."
You've GOT to be kidding me… Kasumi Neechan… where did you sent me to? Had my past actions be so bad that you sent me to a Looney home!?
I sighed as I hear the second weirdo of the house click her tongue. After accepting the towel I took my clothing bag and went to take a bath.
Sometime later, after getting undressed and washed myself, I find myself sitting in the furo pondering what had gone through the past hours… Feeling relaxed as the warm waters run through my skin relaxing my muscles and feeling at ease… that is until I heard a yell…
"CHARGE!" I find myself at the cold-wet end of a water beam stream from a water gun.
"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" I run around like crazy as that crazy girl from before assaults me in the bath with a super soaker! Is she nuts! Wait… wrong phrase… let me try again… hasn't she realized I am running around butt naked!? I retorted after shielding myself with a pan-like thing. "What's wrong with you!"
"Evil familiar! Feel the purification magic of my holy water rifle!" yells the girl.
"You crazy chick! I had it with you! If is a fight you want! It's a fight you'll get!"
I jumped back and took a guard stance preparing myself for an attack. We both stood there glaring at each other trying to find any openings. Then suddenly her expression changed and pointed her finger at a random direction; "Ah! UFO!"
"Eh!?" That took me by surprise and turned my head in reflection… big mistake… I scream again as another turrent of water smashed against my face… how could I fall for the oldest trick in the book?
"GUAAA! CUT IT OUT!" I grabbed a wooden bucket that was on the floor and in a quick motion and swung it at the furo graving some hot water with it and splashed at the crazy red head.
The reaction was something I wasn't expecting… The girl shrieked in fear and cringed back. "oh?" I observed… so she doesn't like hot water? Unusual but I have to take any advantage I got… is the law of anything goes!
I smirked at the girl as I slowly fill the bucket once more; "Soooo… you don't like hot water huh…"
"Oh no! Hot water! My most dangerous weakness! It will trip me off my powers!"
I smirked harder; "Really…?" I raised the filled bucket aiming at her, although her pout was kind of cute… not that I'll admit it out loud.
"You really are evil… taking advantage of a girl's weakness for your gain. I will not submit!"
"Oh really? Well this is pay-back!" I swung the bucket water flying towards her.
The crazy redhead shrieked and jumped backwards as some of the water managed to make contact… odd I kind of heard a change of pitch in her voice but she was out of the bathroom before I could confirm… Never the less now I have my peaceful time back… what a day.
Dinner was awkward… I sat at the table… I kind of felt my left eyebrow twitching… why you ask? Well I was trying to eat my dinner, however two things are making my dinner uncomfortable. First off to my right is that crazy redhead glaring daggers at me… if looks could kill… Then across from myself is aunt Saotome. She was happily looking at me with her chin resting on her hands, which were resting on her elbows on top of the table.
Like I said… awkward situation…
"The food tastes great Aunt Nodoka." I tried to smile at her as I compliment her cooking while my eyebrow still twitched.
"Oh my thank you~ I didn't know what you liked so I managed to make something nice for your welcoming. I am glad you liked it." The older women of the three said to me.
"But I've been wondering… who is this girl aunt Nodoka? She attacked me while I bathe… and now she glares at me."
"What girl dear?"
Oh, this is too much… She is going waaaay overboard with this… "This girl over here!" I stand and point a chopstick toward said girl who flinches back for a second at the sudden movement excepting an attack. "Is she your daughter or something? Why have you been ignoring her all this time?"
Aunt Saotome looked at me blinking then laughed. I sat back dumb folded; "Oh dear! Akane chan I don't have a daughter, just a son! But he is not here right now."
Is this woman serious… I am going crazy? Is what she is saying true? Then never the less she is letting a STRANGER wander around her house and spouting crazy things!? REALLY!?
"AN OPENING!" I heard said crazy girl say as she jumped into the table and swung her baton at me. My instincts took over and I quickly dodged it… barely… damn she's fast… is she a martial artist too?
"Hey! Why did you do that for!?" I stood up ready to fight when I suddenly felt an aura of dread… I quickly turned my head to the source and saw the scariest thing I've ever seen after witnessing Kasumi Neechan's anger… There, sitting still in her chair as the table became a mess, sat aunt Saotome… smiling… yet a red aura was surrounding her like mist of pure demon… I froze like a deer in headlights…
"Akane chan…" she stood slowly. "Its not proper of a lady to…" wait… where did she got that katana from? "PUT YOUR FEET IN THE TABLE!"
Like an expert swing of a samurai with it's grace, I saw a flash of light in the direction the redhead were. Said redhead, which was trembling in fear mind you, screamed in said fear and jumped backwards falling off the table and hitting the corner war… panties of the sailormoon-like costume exposed in all to see and all… I stood there as seconds later the table splits in half… Wha… what just happened?
"Oh my…" aunt Saotome put a hand on her cheek, where did the katana she had go to!? "Look at this… the table broke… must had been old." LIKE HELL NOT SHERLOCK!
I turn my surprised glance toward the crazy redhead and see her trembling like a lost child, I cant blame her… even I am panicking here… Then suddenly something happened… The stew that was on the table, which was sent flying after that little display, fell on top of the crazy redhead splashing it's warm content on her… And I saw it… suddenly the petite figure changed… it grew taller… and defined muscles appeared… And her dirtied chest shrank.
Said girl slowly moved the bowl off her head and I could see that her red hair changed into pitch black. Wha… what's going on? The supposed girl stood slowly up and sighed.
"Ah Ranma! You're back!" I heard aunt Nodoka say. I couldn't take it… my knees gave up as my face turns into a funny mast of surprise and shock. NOW she notices her… was it? Presence?
Said person turns at me and with a hand scratching the back of his or her head, gave an apologetic look to me and spoke; "I am Saotome Ranma a boy that turns into a magical girl… I'm sorry about all this."
Eh?
"Ranma, its not manly to call yourself a magical girl." aunt Nodoka said with a frown.
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHH!?
To be continued? Maybe?
Next time on Denpa Onna yanai, Seishun Otoko da!
As I introduce myself to my classmates and then my teacher showed my sit and I started my day at my new school.
"Hi!" greeted me a boy wearing a yellow bandanna with black polka dots.
"Hello" I greeted back, "Ryoushi san is it?"
"Ryouga! Its Hibiki Ryouga!" the boy squealed… I apologized.
"Ah… You're the new transfer student at my class…" said the girl in front of me as she was dressed in a… was that a tuxedo, cape, top hat and mask!? "I'm Kuonji Ukyo."
Author's Notes:
This is it, my latest one-shot. This one is dedicate for my forum topic of "What hasn't Ranma been crossed with." I hope you guys had enjoyed this reading it as I was while writing it.
This is a parody cross-over of Ranma 1/2 and Denpa Onna to Seishun Otoko. I know that this try-out has a lot of potential but knowing me and my lack of continuous interesting topics, I might let it go and not finish or leave it half done. I do have some ideas or so but… too lazy. Which bring me to this welcome of any good talented young writers in to take upon a project such as this and develop it from this old man. It would be interesting to see a good result.
Oh well. See you next time and please continue the support of Fanfictions everywhere~ (And canon stories too~) good night~