So obviously, there have been many, many Naruto parodies that cover the series. However, all (or most) of these were made before the manga finished, which meant that they couldn't actually cover the whole story (and most probably gave up way before they caught up anyway). I fully intend to cover the whole manga, no matter how long it takes. But like I said, I'm covering the manga first and foremost, so I probably won't be adapting filler and the like.

Anyway, please enjoy (and review! Reviews are nice!)

In Konohagakure (which was a name so hard to spell, all the inhabitants just called it Konoha) there lived a bunch of ninja, or shinobi. These ninja were very powerful, but they also knew the power of teamwork and friendship and bonds and stuff.

However, all this cheesy knowledge wasn't enough to protect them from – the Nine-Tails Fox! One night, the beast suddenly appeared as if from nowhere, crushing a bunch of houses underneath it, instantly killing the no-name characters inside of it.

The Fox was so large, that the ninja were but fleas to it. The Fox, having prided itself on never having fleas before, attacked all the ninja, swiping at them with its oversized claws and chomping at them with its large jaws.

The orange coloring of its fur helped it stand out in the darkness of the night, but the ninja were still overwhelmed. It didn't really matter if they could see it if they couldn't damage it, after all!

One nameless but brave ninja grabbed a kunai knife, and gritted his teeth. He would kill the monster, or die trying. With a battle roar, he charged towards the Fox's flank! By accident, one of the Fox's nine tails slightly nudged the ninja, snapping his neck. No one even noticed the poor ninja.

A few hours later, and the ninja were beginning to despair. But like a ray of sunshine, a powerful ninja parted the clouds of pain and sorrow. This ninja was the Hokage, which was a fancy title for the strongest, coolest, and wisest ninja.

All the weaker (and not quite as cool or smart, for that matter) ninja began to cheer, trying to ignore the jealousy that shot through them. The Hokage would stop the beast!

And he did, but at a great cost…his death. Still, he had managed to seal the Fox away…somewhere. The location? That was a story for another day…

Twelve Years Later

"You idioooooot!" The loud yell rang out throughout Konoha, but most of the villagers ignored it. They were used to Iruka Umino scolding his most troublesome student, a yellow-haired brat by the name of Naruto Uzumaki.

The reason Iruka had grown so agitated was that Naruto had seen fit to vandalize the Hokage mountain using paint. The Hokage mountain was a very important landmark, as it featured the sculpting of the four Hokage who had rules Konoha at various points.

You know, it's kinda weird that, being our most sacred attraction, we don't have any guards posted here. I mean, if some twelve-year old can vandalize it, I hope we're never attacked by any powerful ninja.

Iruka's thoughts were cut short by a loud, insolent raspberry thrown his way.

"Naruto, get down or I swear I'll tell your parents!" Naruto, who had climbed on top of the mountain, flipped his teacher off.

"My parents are dead! I hate you!" Naruto jumped down and ran towards the school, which was about to start for the day. Shockingly enough, Iruka was already behind his desk.

"You know, I could keep you after school, but I feel kinda bad for forgetting that your parents died again, so I'll just tell you to sit down." Grumbling, Naruto did so, sitting next to other kids who will no doubt be important to the story in later chapters.

For the class's first lesson, they were instructed to make clones of themselves. Sasuke Uchiha, the resident class genius/chick magnet/too-cool-for-school dude aced it, as usual. Also per usual, he didn't smile even when being awarded with the highest score. Iruka could see why Naruto, the class loser/clown didn't like Sasuke.

When it was Naruto's turn to make a clone, he turned to Iruka and shouted, "Screw the government and the school system! Sexy Jutsu!"

Naruto's young male body was engulfed by smoke, and before long, his body had changed into that of a well-endowed female, the smoke now only covering the sensitive bits. This is for kids, after all!

Iruka couldn't help but feel…longing, but he had to keep it together! Naruto was his student.

"You fail, you nincompoop! You get the lowest score, again!" Naruto, sobbing, ran outside.

"Maybe you're being too harsh on him, dude." Iruka turned to his fellow teacher (and resident hippy) Mizuki, who had no last name.

"Mizuki, shut up." Iruka had no time for Mizuki's hippy games. Mizuki gave Iruka the peace sign, before dashing off.

Naruto was alone. It wasn't technically a rare thing for him at all. His parents died before he could even remember, he had no friends, and all the adults in Konoha seemed to hate him. To be fair, it was possibly because he vandalized sacred monuments, robbed food stores, and beat up some kids, but c'mon! He just wanted some slack for once!

The boy sighed. He wasn't even a good ninja, although transforming one's own body had to be somewhat impressive. If only that darn showoff Sasuke weren't around!

Naruto almost died of a heart attack when a hand grabbed his shoulder.

"Hey, it's just me, Naruto. Chillax, man." Naruto would know that hippy voice anywhere: Mizuki!

"Huh? What'd you want? Come to tell me I failed another test?" Naruto wasn't sure he could trust Mizuki, who always seemed a bit too friendly with the other students. It gave Naruto goosebumps.

"I can help you gain extraordinary power, man. It'll be, like, totally awesome!" Naruto was intrigued by Mizuki's vague offer.

"OK, I'll bite. But what do I have to do?" Mizuki flashed Naruto a winning smile that was in no way villainous.

"Oh, you only have to rob the current Hokage. You've already robbed convenience stores, so this shouldn't be a problem." Naruto nodded; it was true, stealing things was practically his specialty.

The current Hokage, who happened to be the third Hokage, was smoking a pipe and reading some dirty magazines in the comfort of his Hokage suite. While it was true that he was practically 80 or 100, he still had some youthful stamina left!

His door crashing in alerted the Hokage to the presence of an intruder. Quickly putting on his wide-brimmed Hokage hat, Hiruzen Sarutobi prepared for battle, before feeling his shaky, old legs give way.

"Crud!" he thought as he collapsed. Unfortunately, his large hat blocked his eyesight, so he had no way to identify the thief. Still, he did hear the prowler open dresser, which contained –

"Oh no," Hiruzen breathed. If this thief stole that scroll, there was no telling what would happen! He had to get up! He had to use his will-power to stand up and defeat this cad! He! Had! To! Fight!

Hiruzen managed to do what resembled a push-up before falling and knocking himself unconscious.

Naruto, who had nabbed a surprisingly large scroll from the Hokage's desk, huddled in the trees in the small forest surrounding Konoha. His blue eyes scanned the contents of the scroll, which taught a complex jutsu that could apparently make the wielder a top-class ninja.

"Score! Man, if I can learn this jutsu, Sasuke will have to kiss my butt!" Giggling to himself, Naruto began to realize that he didn't even need Mizuki. The hipster had ordered Naruto to hand the scroll over, but frankly, why bother? This scroll could make Naruto even more powerful than Mizuki.

And with power came respect. If Naruto learned this single jutsu, the villaige would probably stop hating him, maybe. It was a long shot, but Naruto figured that he could handle it.

Unfortunately, he wasn't prepared to handle a blow to the head.

"Owwww! Why'd you do that?" Naruto cradled his head, anime tears cascading down his face. He stuck his tongue out at Iruka, who was glaring at his student.

"Naruto. I know that you're a trouble-maker, and that you love pranks. But please, PLEASE tell me that you did not just rob a sacred scroll from the Hokage. You could be put to death for that!"

Naruto let out some nervous laughter, before deciding that it was time to finally tell the truth. "Mizuki made me, that drugged up loser." Iruka's eyes narrowed.

"I never liked the guy. Thanks, Naruto!" Naruto gave his teacher the thumbs up and grinned. Maybe they could be friends after all.

"Aw, that is, like, so emotional and stuff." Mizuki stepped out from behind a tree. Iruka clenched a fist, and ran towards Mizuki. The white-haired ninja simple jumped back, and threw an over-sized shruiken at Iruka. Iruka, who didn't have the best reflexes, wasn't able to dodge, and the weapon embedded itself in his chest.

Naruto looked on in shock. A teacher was beating up another teacher! He wasn't sure if this was the coolest thing ever, or the weirdest.

"Hey, Naruto. You wanna hear a dark secret?" Naruto nodded, before realizing that Mizuki couldn't see him, as he had decided to hide under a bush. Apparently, Mizuki didn't care, as he went on blabbing.

"You see, twelve years ago, on the day you were born, Konoha was attacked by some way-out stupid Fox that came out of, like, nowhere. It killed lots of dudes before the fourth Hokage, who is a bro, defeated it. But you may ask, where did he place the Fox?"

I didn't ask!" Naruto yelled, but he continued to be ignored by the ranting Mizuki.

"He placed the Fox inside a newborn baby…named Naruto Uzumaki." Naruto was so shocked, he dropped the sacred scroll on the ground, where some chipmunk grabbed it and took it to its nest, where it used it as food for the baby chipmunks.

"I-is that why everyone hates me?" Naruto's lips quivered.

"Uh, no. It's just because you're a jerk all the time, lame-O. It would help if you didn't paint graffiti all the time, little bro." Naruto grew angry, and decided to teach Mizuki a lesson!

Placing his hands together, Naruto cried out, "Multi-Shadow Clone Jutsu!" A large burst of smoke caused Mizuki and Iruka to cough in perfect synchronization. When the dust cleared (and when the two adults dared open their eyes again) they at first though the smoke must have been a hallucinogen.

There must have been at least forty Naruto clones surrounding Mizuki. Some were standing on tree branches because there were no spots left on the ground! Mizuki tried to say something, but he couldn't get his mouth to work.

"No way!" Iruka yelled in surprise, with some pain from his wound mixed in. "I can't believe Naruto, who is established as the worst student in the school, managed to master that apparently super complicated jutsu after reading the scroll only once!"

Naruto cracked his knuckled. "Mizuki, I've never liked you all that much, and since you lied to me and hurt my other teacher, I have an excuse to beat you up." Mizuki screamed.

"Dude. Make love, not war. Violence is for patsies." Naruto wouldn't listen, and he jumped up to Mizuki and punched him the face. Naruto could feel Mizuki's fragile nose break. The rest of the shadow clones took that as their cue, and also began to beat on Mizuki. Before long, the air was filled with moans, grunts, and yells of "Die, Mizuki!" and "This is so cool!"

Finally, having used up all his energy, Naruto collapsed on the ground, and his shadow clones all vanished with a comical popping noise. Mizuki was also on the ground, his body twitching once in a while.

"Naruto, you did it. I am so proud of you," Iruka said, his voice strained as he pulled out the giant shruiken from his chest. Naruto ignored him, and stared at his bruised fist.

"Iruka-sensei, do you think that I'll still have to be the class loser even though I just beat an adult ninja easily?" Naruto turned to look at Iruka, hoping the answer would be satisfying.

"Nah, you'll still get bad grades. Oh, I'm kidding, you can graduate, since you saved my life and all!" Iruka laughed, and Naruto couldn't help but laugh with him.

"So, what'll happen to Mizuki?" Naruto was worried that Mizuki would want revenge. Iruka shrugged.

"You know, you'd think that the first villain of this series would be important, but I have a feeling he'll never show up again," Iruka mused.

"Huh, that reminds me of a certain villain from Dragon Ball Z, a cool manga that I was reading during all your classes," Naruto said, remembering how fun that had been. He failed to notice Iruka glaring daggers at him.

Author's Notes

Well, that was my first chapter. Once again, I hope you enjoyed, and even if you didn't, I'm sure my writing will improve the more I write these!

This chapter covered the first episode, and I couldn't help but poke fun at how Mizuki, the first villain, NEVER appears again (aside from a stupid filler arc where he became a tiger-man. WTH). Kinda like Raditz from DBZ.