Prompt: Water
Rating: T (depending on how you look at it, it may deserve a M)
He remembers the days of starvation and sadness and silence. When even a word would get him a full slap across his face. Of sneaking out in the dark of the night to steal even a crumb. Of bruises littering his frail frame and callouses forming on fragile fingers. He remembers not being able to sleep because of a gnawing hunger, of claws raking down his insides; not being able to cry because what is the point of crying; not being able to live because what is there to live for?
Iruka remembers too well what desperation get kids living on the bad side of town: men groping and fumbling; scavenging in dumpsters, and getting kicked out of 'respectable establishments'.
Iruka remembers when he look at Naruto only because when looking at Naruto he sees himself. He sees a child size Iruka staring back at him, desperate for even an ounce of affection in Kiri, in his exhausted parents, in dead shinobi, and in the teachers who sent them out to die.
Growing up in Kirigakure was hard on the shinobi, and shinobi in training, living in the shadows of men like Kisame and Zabuza. When his family finally escaped hell on earth, he only entered a new hell. Of taunting children, monsters the size of mountains, dead parents, and he remembers the one night he decided to end all of it.
It was deep in the forest of Konahagakure, the trees there grew in close together, thick and silent. He stood in front of a calm lake reflecting the moonlight, so similar to the ones in Kiri, and absurdly wished he was back. Though tortuous, his parents were still alive. Stepping into the water, Iruka walked into the middle and felt the strain on his chest, but he was at peace. And he shut his eyes. When Iruka opened them next he was staring into the furious gray eyes of a Jounin and the rest was history.
But Iruka still remembers the calm waters that embraced him like family.
And he wonders how Naruto, the child so like himself, sought escape from this continuous cycle.