Chapter 1

"Leland Blaine Chapman, I swear to God I will kill you myself if you ever scare me like that again!" I was standing toe to toe with him and he towered over me. I'm only 5 foot so I suppose it's fair to say that most people do. I was furious, I could feel the tears filling my eyes and I swiped them away impatiently. He tried to wrap his arms around me but I stepped back away from him. "Don't! Don't you dare think that you can just put your arms around me and I will forget. You scared me. I thought I was going to lose you!" The tears were rolling down my face and I couldn't stop them. I wasn't supposed to be out with the team today but I'd decided at the last minute to tag along. The fugitive they'd gone after had a gun and he'd lost it when he saw the guys turn up. He spotted me by the cars and turned the gun on me. I guess he figured that if you of us got hurt he could make a run for it. Leland's dad screamed down the radio what was happening. I turned to run when I saw Leland sprinting right towards the guy. I yelled at him to stop but he didn't listen and jumped on the guy as he pulled the trigger. The bullet grazed my shoulder but the police said later that if Leland hadn't done what he did that it probably would have gone straight through my chest.

"You thought you were going to lose me? He had a gun on you! He shot you! Jesus, T. I was terrified. If I could have swapped places with you I would have. I don't like feeling helpless." Thats when I noticed that he was crying. He never cried. He hadn't even cried when his granddad had passed away. I stepped closer and gently wiped away his tears. I wrapped my arms around his waist and rested my head on his chest.

I'm not sure how long we stood like that. At some point we moved to the sofa where I curled up on his lap and I continued to cry for the both of us. I think it was shock. Eventually the tears stopped and we just sat there. He inspected the stitches the doctor had put in my shoulder and the cut on my forehead from where I'd banged my it as I fell. Apparently I had a black eye now too but I hadn't seen that yet.

It was hard knowing that situations like that were normal for him. The only reason this one had scared him at all was because I was there. I wasn't sure if I should be scared or flattered by it: he truly valued my life over his own. How would I have explained that to his children? Your dad thought my life was worth more than his so he took a bullet for me. How would I have explained that to my unborn child? The one he still didn't know about. I was 4 months pregnant and right then wasn't the time to tell him that. I think he would have flip his lid if he knew that I was pregnant during this whole thing.

We hadn't discussed children. We'd only been a couple for about 6 months. Leland had 2 boys from his marriage. Yes, my boyfriend was technically a married man. The boys, Dakota and Cobie, were his world. They were the reason we met originally. I was his kids babysitter. Clichéd I know but it's true. I was 15 when we met. His wife had walked out on their marriage and his stepmom had recommended me to him. I'd babysat his little brother and sister for a while and they loved me so Leland had hired me to watch the kids after school and all weekend.

At first I wasn't sure but about all the hours but then I laid eyes on Leland and it was all worth it. Leland was gorgeous. The stereotypical tall, dark and handsome except that to most people he didn't seem that tall. He was about 5 foot 6, long dark hair and absolutely beautiful chocolate brown eyes. He was covered head to toe in tattoos and looked tough and mean. When he talked to me though he was a true sweetheart. He called me sweetheart, darlin' or Sugar from the very first day. He'd come and pick me up and open the car door for me and he talked to me like I was an adult.

We were friends from the very start. We talked about everything and nothing until the early hours then he'd sleep on the couch so I could crash in his bed. The second I was in his bed I was filled with desire. Usually I could control it but when I was surrounded by his smell and knowing he lay where I was night after night was just too much. It scared me how I felt so I tried to forget by going out with some guys from my school.

Thats when things went sour. I was on a date with a guy from school called Jason. I'd told Leland about it and he wasn't happy because he knew his family. He kept telling me they were bad news but I wouldn't listen. Leland had Jason pick me up from his house so he could check him out. I had his cell too. He'd made sure he put it in my bag himself. He said it was in case there was an emergency and he needed to get hold of me. I don't know why Leland was so paranoid this time but I'm glad he was.

Jason wouldn't keep his hands to himself and when I told him to stop he wouldn't. He called me a tease and tried putting his hands up my top. I kicked him in the stomach and ran. I heard him chasing me so I ran straight to the nearest shop and dialed Leland without even thinking. I don't remember what I said to him. I was sobbing and he kept me on the phone while he told Duane Lee, his brother, to watch the kids. I remember hearing the car door slam and his tires screeching on the driveway. He must have driven the whole way with his foot down.

He ran into the store and wrapped me in his arms. Thats when I truly broke down. I was 17 at that point and extremely innocent and naive. Leland took me back to his house and when I couldn't make my legs work to get me out of his car he came and carried me into the house. I clung to him and wouldn't let go. As far as I was concerned Leland had stopped Jason raping me, I felt safe with him and only him. He sat on the couch and cradled me in his lap. I remember him whispering into my hair that I was safe and he'd look after me. Duane Lee headed into the kitchen to find the box of green tea I kept there. I heard him banging around the kitchen looking for my favorite mug and then I heard him mumbling to himself about how my tea stunk and looked vile anyway. It brought a small smile to my face; he had always refused to make my tea before. By the time he brought it into the living room I was able to move to sit next to Leland. I made sure I kept touching him though. I put my hands on his legs and he kept his arm around me.

That was the first time that either of us was aware of the chemistry between us. I'm not sure why it became apparent then but it did. My skin tingled at his touch and I could feel it burning through me. I thought at first it might be that I was so grateful to him for saving me but it continued to happen even after that night. It was as if we'd somehow flipped a switch and couldn't turn it off again. The electricity continued to flow between us.

I was kicked out of home not long after that night. My parents thought I was sleeping around and stealing. They wouldn't believe me when I told them I was working and staying over when my boss was late. My parents were drug addicts and alcoholics. My mother tried to beat me for staying out in Leland's and when I hit her back for the first time they kicked me out. Again, I ran to Leland. I'm not sure why I kept running to him. I was close with his stepmother, his dad and even his uncle and his brother but it was always Leland who sprung to mind first. He took me in straight away and even gave me his bedroom. He slept in Duane Lee's room when Duane Lee wasn't around and on the couch when he was. He was the perfect gentleman.

For nearly 4 years we tried to ignore the sexual tension between us. We pretended we were just friends even though neither of us so much as went out on a date for over 3 years. How he managed it I will never know. Having shared his bed for 6 months it seemed unbelievable that he could go more than 3 years without the touch of a woman. We fell into a routine at home and tried to avoid touching whenever possible. There was so much unspoken between us but we both understood what are boundaries were.

For my 21st birthday his dad and his wife, Beth, babysat Dakota and Cobie while Leland, Duane Lee and Duane Lee's wife took me out. We went out for dinner and then on to a club. We were dancing and enjoying ourselves when some girls came and tried hitting on Leland. He was being polite, telling them he wasn't interested but they wouldn't listen. They kept touching him no matter how much he tried to get them to stop. I saw red, I flipped. How dare they? He was dancing with me, touching me, holding me so close I knew for certain he was pleased to be there with me and they wouldn't listen. I walked over, grabbed Leland and pulled him against my body. I smirked at the 2 girls who were staring at me. "I'm not as polite as him so fuck off now and leave my man alone before I claw your skanky eyes out. Is that clear enough for you?" I pulled Leland's face down to meet mine and kissed him. I kissed him the way I'd wanted to for years, the way I thought I'd never be able to and to my complete delight he kissed me back. I thought he'd be horrified by what I'd just done but he seemed pleased. He was 30 and I was 21, he'd known me for years. This shouldn't be happening but it felt too right not to let it.

When I pulled away from him the girls were gone and Duane Lee and his wife were staring at us. Duane Lee pulled Leland to the bar and I took a trip to the ladies with Sara, his wife. When we got there she instantly pulled me to the mirrors and started re-applying my make up. "What was that about? You kissed him T!" She was genuinely shocked by it.

"I know and it felt amazing, like there was nobody else in the world but us. I never thought I'd be brave enough to kiss him but I don't regret it." I couldn't stop smiling at her. She wasn't smiling back though and eventually my smile started to falter. What had I done to upset her so badly?

"So what happens now? Do you stay living there? Start playing mummy to his kids? Have the happily ever after? What do you want from this?" She was angry at me and I couldn't quite figure out why. I hadn't done anything wrong and it hurt that she was being so mean and sarcastic.

"I don't know Sara. What do you want me to say? I did what felt right and natural. It still feels right and Leland wasn't a victim by the way. He was more than willing. I love him!" I was shocked by what I'd just said. I knew it was true and I was excited by it. I should have been scared by that fact but I wasn't. Sara's mood seemed to instantly change. It was like the storm had lifted and the sun was breaking through the clouds. She smiled at me and hugged me close to her. The change was so swift that it made my head spin.

"I'm sorry T. We just had to know that this wasn't going to be some fling. You two are too closer to spoil it like that. It's about time you two got your act together though. You make the most amazing couple!" She released me from the bone crushing hug and started pulling me back into the club. That woman could be so confusing sometimes.

Duane Lee and Leland were leaning against the bar. Leland had a goofy smile plastered all over his face but Duane Lee was angry. "Dude, what were you thinking? She's 21 and obviously has a crush on you! Why are you encouraging her?" He was shouting because he was furious rather than to be heard over the music. Leland should have known better. It wasn't just his feelings that were involved. The whole family cared about T and if she got hurt over this there would be hell to pay!

"I wasn't thinking. She kissed me and I kissed her back. I don't see the problem with it to be honest and anyway, maybe it's not a crush? Maybe this is real for both of us!" Did I just say that? Shit, I did and it's true. This isn't just some game or some drunken one night stand. "I love her!"

It was at that moment that the girls came out of the bathroom. The full implications of what he'd only just realized hadn't sunk in yet. How had he gone from hiring this girl as a babysitter to loving her in one giant step?

I walked towards him and slid my arms around his waist. It felt natural to do it now even though 10 minutes ago I wouldn't have dreamed of it. Something had changed during that kiss that I couldn't quite put my finger on. Even though I was still nervous about touching him there was no hesitation about it. Maybe admitting to my feelings had made this possible?

He wrapped his strong, muscular arms around me and kissed the top of my head. I felt truly alive then. I breathed in deep and enveloped myself in that scent that was uniquely him. He smelt like soap and shampoo but underneath all of that was him. To me it smelt like the sky after a storm and the beach at sunrise all rolled into one. I know that wasn't possible but it's what his unique scent made me think of. I found myself thinking how bizarre it was that I was even attracted to his scent. Even when he came home after a session at the gym I was liked the way the air smelt around him. although after the gym he smelt like what I thought sex would smell like. That unique, utterly masculine scent made me go weak at the knees. Leland had never smelt bad, not once in all the years I'd know him.

"Earth to T, come in T," I smiled up at him wondering exactly what I'd missed. "Do you want another drink?"

"Oh, erm, yes please." I felt myself starting to blush and I begged my body to stop but it wouldn't. My face started to burn as I felt him watching me. I could see that he was trying to figure out why I was so embarrassed and then it was as if a light bulb went off in his head.

He leaned into me and laughed. I felt a shiver run down my spine as he did. "My gorgeous girl, were you just thinking sexy thoughts about me?" I blushed even more and couldn't bring myself to answer him. How could I be so bold one minute and then so shy the next? "Would you like to spend the night with me T?" His soft voice slid over my entire body giving me goosebumps. My mouth was so dry that I couldn't have spoken even if I wanted to so I just nodded my agreement. He kissed me on the forehead then and I felt this sudden urge to pay him back for laughing at me. So I ran my nails from his neck to the base of his spine and felt him shiver and try to hold still. I couldn't help but smirk at him when he turned to face me with his eyes burning with desire. We didn't stay long after that.

That night was our first night together. Duane Lee and Sara gave us their hotel room while they went to babysit for us. It was a first for so many reasons: my first time with Leland, the first time someone told me they loved me and the first night I'd spent in a bed with anybody. Leland was so gentle and loving with me. He made sure I was happy and comfortable with everything that was happening.

I woke up the next morning snuggled against Leland's chest. At some point his hair had come out of its braid and was now fanned across my breasts and stomach. I lay there and watched him sleep for the longest time. He looked so angelic. His long dark eyelashes brushed his cheek and his full, tender lips were parted slightly. The morning sun was bathing the room and it showed me the flecks of red in his hair and the redness of his lips for the first time. I realized then that I could have lay there just watching him sleep for hours. Usually he looked so masculine and tough but right at that moment the only word to describe him was beautiful. I was so happy and content in that moment that I remember thinking that I was dreaming because it felt too perfect but then he stretched and opened one eye. "Morning Sugar."