What Dreams May Come
by: Laura Boeff
The soft shuffle just barely pricked at the edge
of his consciousness and even then, it took a whole second to register.
Frowning, Ace looked around the living room where he was currently stretched
out, on the couch, with a book. The hour was late... Way late, but traveling
always disturbed his sleep and he found solace amongst the massive collection
of his books.
The scuffle came again, soft... hesitant. It also
came from the hall. A shadow flitted there, the Express's light being dimmed
in the night time hours. A slight shifting of dark on dark.
"Cosmo?" Ace called uncertainly. The shadow froze,
caught and yet not.
Ace's frown deepened. Cosmo should have been sleeping.
They'd been traveling all day, the teen handling most of the actual driving
during their eight hour trip. It had been two days since the last show
in Electro City and now they were starting their multi city tour.
Setting the book aside, Ace rose slowly, peering
in to the dark hall.
"Cosmo, are you okay?" he called worriedly. He
had reason to worry. Cosmo had survived his first real clash with his magical
abilities... Just barely. Outwardly the teen was as bright and vibrant
as ever, but that was outwardly. To Ace's shrewd eye the taint of that
moment hung like a dark cloud. Small looks, quick actions, said more then
any brief glance would lead one to believe.
"Sorry, Ace," Cosmo said, voice barely above a
whisper. "Didn't mean to disturb you."
It was said as much of an apology as a retraction
of his presence and the shadow started to drift into the halls darkness.
Something was very wrong. Every protective instinct Ace owned came to life
at the lifeless voice that had answered his entries.
"Your welcome to stay," Ace called, making his
way to the door, casually, without provocation. A small hesitation, a slight,
trembling breath gave him the insight he needed. Something had roused Cosmo
from his sleep. Something dark and malignant had sent the teen to roaming
the halls in search of some comfort. A comfort the young man obviously
felt uncertain in acquiring from him. Ace sighed softly. They were so very
alike. So outgoing in appearance, so private in thought, but where as Ace
had Mona to turn to in those uncertain moments, Cosmo had no one. Or thought
he had no one.
"It's okay, Cosmo. I would like the company," he
offered openly, no strings attached. A pause, then the shadow approached,
hovering just outside the light caste from the living room. Cosmo's form
shaping a hesitant dark spot, arms hugging a slender body tight.
"You sure you don't mind?" The question had many
levels, many meanings, and Ace accepted them all without hesitation.
"Of course not, Cosmo," he returned with open honesty.
"Please..."
And yet Cosmo was still, at the edge of the light,
as if unwilling to expose himself, unwilling to bare the demons the dark
had gifted him with in the light of the living room. Ace said nothing as
he raised his hands, the light lowering to a muted level. Then, and only
then did Cosmo move, one bare foot stepping onto the thick carpeting that
ran wall to wall here, clad in his blue boxers and T-shirt. The teen's
typical sleepware.
Even with the lights as low as they were, it was
plainly apparent Cosmo had been crying, hair disheveled and falling in
his face without the restraining headband. Gray eyes darted about uncertainly
as he slowly approached, hands tightening on his trembling arms, as if
afraid he'd be banished from here at any moment.
"Trouble sleeping?" Ace asked gently, approaching
as Cosmo stopped inside the room, testing the waters as it were.
"Yea," he answered in a dim whisper, a tremble
underscoring the power of his dreams unpleasant visit. He looked about
nervously and Ace saw the boy of years past who'd come into his world with
no trust, no faith and a soul deep loneliness. A loneliness Ace would not
tolerate.
"You look cold," he said sympathetically, pulling
his cape from the chair where he'd discarded it earlier, wrapping it about
exposed shoulders. A slight flinch as he touched, frightened and yearning.
Lonely.... afraid.
"Come, sit down," Ace suggested kindly, stepping
away just enough to allow Cosmo to pass. Feet scuffling over the heavy
carpet the teen made his way to the couch, curling up at it's far end,
drawing his feet up into the capes silk depths, arms wrapping around his
knees, eyes still darting uncertainly around.
"Reading?" Cosmo asked suddenly, eyes touching
briefly on the forgotten book, then off again throughout the room. Anywhere,
but at Ace.
"Nothing exciting," Ace answered dismissively.
He didn't want to add any fuel to Cosmo's already nervous fire. Slowly
he approached and sat, not quit far away and yet, not quit close, beside
his friend. Cosmo scrunched himself up a little tighter, but a brief glance
spoke the volumes he would not voice.
Fear, a fear so great and deep that it could not
be comprehended and yet, he felt unsure of how to share it. How to open
up, even to the one person who was his closest friend, even sometimes father
in all but blood.
"You want to talk about it?" Ace pressed, ever
so carefully. He knew that fear. The first time he'd touched the magic...
He'd cried himself to sleep in the dark for many a night. Very alone, very
afraid and very confused. All he had wanted was someone to assure him.
To hold him and bear out the tears.
There had been no one. Only the chilling darkness
and the dreams beyond.
"It's okay," Cosmo said at last, shifting in the
black depths, a slight tremble rippling the soft fabric.
"Is it?" Ace gently asked. The shiver grew pronounced
and a visible effort was made to stop it, but there was no answer. Ace
sighed softly to himself and discreetly slid over, closer to the lost soul
on his couch. Cosmo either didn't notice or didn't mind, eyes still wandering
over the room.
"You were dreaming about the magic?" he tried,
voice light and unassuming. A negative shake was his answer and very puzzling.
Ace's own demons had been caused by the memory of the burning fire that
had been born of him. That had torn out of his body with a will all it's
own. It was difficult to think of something more disturbing then that.
"Cosmo?"
The eyes finally meet his, locked in with a mad
desperation. Tears threatened their worn edges and the pupils dilated as
the nightmares touch returned, gracing the normally bright, gray eyes with
a sickly tinge of dread. A soft sob tore free, though there had been an
attempt to suppress it.
Ace hesitated no longer and slid quickly over,
wrapping one arm about the shuddering form, drawing Cosmo close, even as
the teen stiffened under the sudden intimacy, fighting so briefly until
the pain became overpowering.
"It's okay," Ace hushed gently, as a sob broke
free and Cosmo buried himself against the magician, body wracked with every
heartfelt whimper.
"So dark..." The words were soft and strained,
but the force of their description was not lost on Ace.
"What was dark?" Ace urged, letting his hand travel
over the disrupted red locks, smoothing them back gently. He felt hot tears
start to stain through the fabric of his shirt and tightened his hold,
Cosmo burrowing deeper into his embrace.
"So dark..." he murmured again, lost in the memory.
"Talk to me, Cosmo," Ace called gently, trying
to pull his partner from his viscous remembrance.
"I wanted out...out..." Cosmo hiccuped, fought
for breath and trembled. Ace made a soft hushing noise as he strove to
breath.
"It's okay, Cosmo... you're safe now,"
A sharp, negative shake answered his statement.
The trembling worsened and Ace tightened his hold.
"It is," he assured firmly. "It's over."
"Still there," Cosmo protested. "Still there..."
Briefly the teen struggled to get free. To deny the nightmare he'd fought
to escape and to return to the uncertain shadows of his misery. Ace would
have none of it and pulled Cosmo closer, levering a considerable amount
of strength against his friends struggles.
"No, Cosmo. I want to help... don't be afraid,"
Ace argued with infinite care. Whether sensing his determination or simply
given in to the inevitable, Cosmo ceased his escape attempt and went limp
against him, small shivers wracking his body.
"I wasn't dead.... wasn't alive... so dark, so
alone," he said in a frightened rush. It was starting to make sense. Ace
resumed smoothing back the red hair making little nonsense noises to comfort
the tortured soul in his arms.
"So alone..."
"You're not alone anymore, Cosmo. You fought free,"
Ace reminded him, even as he reprimanded himself for not addressing this
problem earlier. He'd been so happy when Cosmo had finally come to, that
he'd never thought to ask what had happened during those two days where
his partners presence had seemed to have flown in all but body.
They obviously had not been spent in peacefully
nothingness.
"Tell me about it, Cosmo," he entreated softly,
never stopping his reassuring caress. Cosmo shivered and buried his face
against his chest, Ace easily feeling the racing heartbeat against his
side as if it was his own.
"I'll go back there," Cosmo whispered, mind seemingly
roving of it's own accord.
"I'll go back..."
"No, Cosmo. No you won't," Ace interrupted. A weak
cry of denial answered him and Cosmo shook his head again.
"Inside me. It's inside me and it caught me, held
me in the darkness," he protested Ace's claim. Ace hushed him and fervently
tried to instill some calm. He suspected he understood what Cosmo was saying,
but he didn't wish to risk any misunderstanding.
"What's inside you, Cosmo? What are you afraid
of?"
"The magic." A shudder. "The dark... Alone."
Ace hugged Cosmo fiercely, placing a soft kiss
to a trembling brow.
"The magic is not the darkness Cosmo. Do not be
afraid of the magic," he offered calmly. "I won't let you go into the darkness
again."
The trembling didn't stop, but settled as a ragged
breath was drawn.
"I was alone. Forever," Cosmo whispered softly,
voice hitching with strained breath. There was a pause, a struggle to gather
air, then a sudden exhale.
"You won't let me go back, will you."
Much to Ace's surprise, it wasn't a question, but
a statement. As if a realization had been struck. Cosmo shifted slightly,
not pulling away, but craning his head up to look at him through tear puffed
eyes.
Ace returned his gaze and found himself studied
intently, as if some particular point was being searched out.
"You were there." Cosmo said suddenly, softly.
"I remember a light. You. It was you."
Ace had no idea. But that seemed a moot point to
Cosmo as he kept watching him, one brow slightly crumpled in consideration.
"I don't know, Cosmo, but you don't have to afraid
of the darkness anymore. You've faced it, you conquered it and now you're
learning. You won't go back." Ace assured, though there was a kernel of
doubt. Magic was so temperamental, a tricky partner to have. Cosmo had
barely even started to learn to ignore the magic's touch, let alone how
to wield it.
'Are you lying?' the voice inside asked. 'How do
you know it won't happen again?'
-Because I won't allow it- He answered fiercely.
He would not! Even if it took all his skill with the magic force to prevent
it. Even if it took his life.
The silent argument did not go unnoticed as Ace
saw a shift in the searching gaze. Uncertain, afraid, then hopeful. Accepting
in the end. Cosmo settled back against his chest, the shivers still dancing
through young muscle, but no longer with the heavy impact of earlier.
"You were there," he said so gently. "Alone.. but
you came."
Ace tightened his embrace, laying a cheek on top
of Cosmo head, feeling the silk strands tickle his nose.
"I will always be there, Cosmo. Whenever you need
me. Never be afraid, of the dark or of coming to me for help," he assured
solemnly, feeling the power of his own words calm his troubled friend at
last. A sleepy sigh rustled the damp fabric of his shirt and tentatively
a hand reached out and wrapped around his protective arm.
"Thank you."
The words summed up everything, past, present and
future and healed whatever wounds might have been left forgotten.
"Always there for you, Cosmo," Ace reiterated resolutely,
settling into the couch's soft depths, pulling Cosmo with him. The two
sitting in serene silence, content and secure. The comfort one had sought
having brought peace to two.