Guy Talk
Summary: Fang and Iggy have a little chat about their feelings. Kind of. Fax and Eggy.
Hey everybody! Just decided to do this, so enjoy! :)
Disclaimer: I don't own Maximum Ride.
~~Guy Talk~~
"Get out."
Fang swiveled around in his chair, pausing to face Iggy who was crouched on his bed.
"But Fangggg," Iggy whined, making "snow angels" on his bed, crumpling the sheets, "Ella won't even look at me after what I did to her date. How did you even snag Max anyway?"
"I just did. Go away. I'm writing my next blog post."
"No one really reads it anymore, do they? I mean c'mon, ever since the Apocalypse there has been almost no personal laptops. Since, you know, who had the time to stop at Walmart when they were on the run just for the sake of a laptop? Besides us, anyway."
Fang didn't answer. Truthfully, he actually got an average of ten views a day out of the entire mutant island, and that was on a good day. I mean, seriously, viewing his blog was like reading the newspaper since everybody always knew what was going on.
He didn't mind though.
He turned back to his laptop and started tapping away at the keys once more.
"C'mon, just tell me how you got her," Iggy once again tried.
Fang sighed. "I kissed her in a cave, she ran away. Then she proclaimed her undying love to me on drugs. The End."
"Wow. Harsh."
"So what's up with you? Things going okay?"
"With Ella?"
Fang shot him a look saying, "As if anybody else had the guts to like some dimwitted pyro like you."
Iggy flipped over onto his back and sighed deeply.
"Well the other day she told me that she had a date with some other mutant kid and I kinda got mad, you know? So I kind of followed her to her date and…" he whispered the last part, "threw him off a cliff."
"Oh, oka- wait, you what?"
"Threw him off a cliff. Don't worry, he could fly though!" Iggy added along cheerfully, before thinking for a second. "But then again, I don't think I knew that beforehand…"
Fang sighed. He should've known.
"This is why you don't do things like that. And why you should've started to date her the minute we got on the island. But noooo, you said that it was 'too early.' Yeah right, too early, my as-" Fang started, nagging him like a mother would.
"Now, now, no cursing," Iggy scolded.
"But it's true. Unless you're," Fang wheeled around to face the strawberry blonde, "scared?"
"No!"
"Yup. You're scared. End of discussion. Get out."
"I'm not scared!"
"Yes you are."
"Nuh uh."
"You sure?"
"I'm sure."
"Super sure?
"Super sure."
"One hundred percent positive?"
"One hundred percent positive."
"Seriously?"
"Seriously."
"So if, say, that same kid made another move you'd be fine?"
"I'd be completely fin- what the fnick?! Of course not! I'll kill him!" Iggy yelled, sitting up straight.
"Kill him?" Fang said, raising an eyebrow.
"Yup. Throw him into a river, rip his arms off, send him into the rapids and over a waterfall," Iggy said proudly.
"Harsh. But I wouldn't blame him. Ella is related to Max, so maybe I might just, you know, go after her," Fang said.
"…you wouldn't dare."
"If you don't ask her out soon, then maybe."
"…"
Fang sighed, and smirked. "Relax, I already have Max. I won't go after someone that you've already laid your eyes on."
"I don't have my eyes on h-"
"Don't even think about saying it. Now I gotta work. So git."
"Whatever."
Iggy sat there for a while, staring as Fang, went back to work, only the sound of others playing outside and the keys on the keyboard clicking. And then a roar.
"Was that… you?" Fang said, turning back to Iggy.
"No. It came from outside."
"It sounded strangely like Ella."
"You think so too?"
"… where were you before this?"
"At Ella's date. Then I flew here."
"Oh no."
Right then, the door to Fang's room flew open, and Ella, looking like she had just ran a marathon in under twenty minutes (which she probably just did), came barging in. Her eyes racked the room, until she saw a trembling mass under the covers.
"Iggy…" she said dangerously.
"I'm sorry!" the bed squeaked. "I'm just a bed."
Ella stomped over to the bed, threw the bed sheets away, and grabbed Iggy by the ear.
"You mister," she said to his face, "Are coming with me."
She dragged him, kicking and screaming like a little child, to the door.
"Sorry about this Fang," she apologized. "You can get back to whatever you were doing."
"No prob."
With that she disappeared, and the shouts of peril slowly faded away.
Fang sighed. "Finally some peace and quiet."
Then somebody else came through.
"Did you just see my sister dragging Iggy across the hallway?" Max said, sitting down in a chair.
"Yeah. He messed up one of her dates by throwing her date of a cliff," Fang said. As long as it was Max, he was okay.
"Poor hi- he what?"
"Threw her date off a cliff. Don't worry, he could fly."
"That's not the point!" Max shouted. "You know what, I might just go help Ella…"
Of course, since Fang still had feelings (probably) and thought that Iggy probably was in enough pain right now, he closed his laptop's hood, got up and grabbed Max by the waist, taking her by surprise.
"You smell nice," Fang said. "Did you switch shampoos?"
"Yup!" Max said happily. "I got some from Nud- wait, don't change the subject!"
"How about we go out for dinner tonight? You know, at the one near the coast."
"But that's the most expensive restaurant on the island!" Max gasped. "And don't you need reservations?"
"All the better the food probably is," Fang replied. "And I've been planning on taking you anyway. They'll let us in once they know who are, reservations or no reservations. We are pretty famous here."
"You're sweet. Whatever, let's go. Although I bet the food isn't as good as Iggy's," Max said, with a smile.
~~Guy Talk~~
"Explain." Max said, tapping her foot.
Ella smiled at her older sister, and Iggy, who was covered in bandages and bruises, winked at Fang. They were both eating and their table was right next to theirs.
"Well, after Ella dragged me outside the caves, she started to beat me up you know? Since I let her," Iggy started.
"You did not let me. Well, suddenly he just kind of broke down and started apologizing," Ella added.
"I did not. I simply begged for forgiveness. So she heard me out and we lived happily ever after," Iggy said happily.
"Not so fast. Actually, I paused for a while and listened to his excuses before proceeding to hit him."
"But then I kissed her, and she just kind of went into shock mode. So then she ran back to her room, after one last punch."
"I did not! I calmly went back to my room after being able to express my anger."
"Well, that happened so I kind of followed her and kicked down her door since she locked it."
"Of course, I just happened to be getting ready to take a shower so he caught me… without a shirt on."
"Or pants!"
"Shut up."
"But anyway, she kind of screamed at me, before kicking me out, but I went back in and kissed her again and before you know it," Iggy said, "we're here!"
Max and Fang were silent for a moment as Ella and Iggy gazed at each other lovingly, before Max spoke up. "I… will never get your relationship," she finally declared.
"Me either," Fang added.
"Want to go order?" Max said.
"Yeah. I'm getting hungry."
With that, they turned around to their table leaving the couple alone.
~~Guy Talk~~
"Aww! They're both so adorable!" Nudge cooed, as she peered through the binoculars from where she, Gazzy, and Angel hid behind some rubble mess.
"No fair! Let me see!" Gazzy whined, as he tried to snatch the glasses from her.
They fought for a while, until finally Gazzy snatched them away from her.
"I wish I could hear what they were saying though," Nudge said.
"I'm just making sure that Iggy doesn't accidentally slip one of our explosives in front of Max," Gazzy said.
"WHAT?! I'm telling Max!" Nudge gasped.
Once again they started to fight, and punches flew everywhere.
Angel, on the other hand, just smiled. Since she could read minds, she could hear every bit of their conversation, or at least what they were thinking, and had kept her mouth shut to Nudge and Gazzy who could only see the two couples, though she couldn't help smiling.
All's well that ends well.
Yay! The end. I really liked writing this one, even though it was a little hard since I had no idea how to end it. So I just kinda stuck the rest of the Flock in there. Well, hopefully you enjoyed this! R&R!