This is for MaybeTomorrow for being my beta for Russian Roulette. I'm sorry for taking so long. I've been up to my eyeballs in stuff to do. My step-mom is too lazy to get her own damn computer!

I splashed the cold water onto my face, feeling the sting as it met with my skin. I pressed a soft towel to my face and looked into the mirror, feeling a few escapee drops run down into my ear. Piercing sea-blue eyes met with my gaze and drifted down over my face. Cuts and scrapes lined my cheeks from a hard mission I had come from. Xion and I were beginning to receive more and more missions together, but I also had received news just before the mission that distracted me plenty.

Castle Oblivion had been destroyed, and there were no survivors found. Axel had been on that mission, and now he was gone.

The fact that I was never going to see my best friend again had rattled me. I put the towel onto the rack and walked out quickly. The castle seemed quiet, and I was actually thanking any lucky stars that Marluxia was gone. That sadist debutant wouldn't be here to nag about anything he could find wrong with the castle. I entered my bedroom and sat down on my bed.

"Things are going to be boring around here," I murmured, lying back and putting my arms under my head. I closed my eyes, wishing that tonight wasn't one of those nights where I couldn't get to sleep. Being the on/off-insomniac of the Organization had its ups and downs, but tonight was definitely a down.

"Roxas!" I heard a whisper outside my door. I sat up as it opened, and Xion poked her head inside. She looked apologetic. "I heard about Axel; I'm sorry." She moved in and closed the door behind her gently so as not to disturb the other members that were still alive.

"It's cool," I replied, leaning back against my hands. "There's not much to be done now. Sacrifices are needed sometimes." I tried my best to seem stoic about it, but she just shook her head.

"You just wish the sacrifice had been someone else, don't you?"

I paused, knowing she was dead-on. She gave me a smile.

"Just let me sleep," I said, lying back down onto the bed and turning away from her. "I'm tired."

"Okay. Good night." She left, closing the door behind her again. I nuzzled my face into the pillow, closing my eyes. I just wasn't tired. I didn't bother pulling the blankets up over me.

The castle was silent. Everyone was probably asleep. I buried my face deeper into the cushion, sighing loudly. The silence was killing me. I opened my eyes and turned on my other side, hoping that maybe that would help. It really didn't. I turned over a few more times before giving up and closing my eyes to wait out the night. Usually, during a night like this, Axel would sneak into my room, sneak us out, and we'd have some fun out in the different worlds.

I remembered the last time we had snuck out, and I blushed as I did. It had been the first time we'd really tried to commit to anything. I remembered our conversation clearly, just as I remembered every other conversation we had ever had. Every one of them started with me pushed up against a wall – no escape routes were ever left, even if I wanted them – and my and Axels lips caught in a hungry dance. One arm would snake around my waist and the other caressing my cheek; it was his way of telling me that I wouldn't get away.

"We've been doing this for years," he whispered huskily to me when we pulled away for breathing. "I'm sick and tired of this broken record." But despite the annoyance in his tone, he kissed me fully again, dominating every sense of my body, including common sense.

"I don't mind it at all," I replied, arms wrapped securely around his neck. "I happen to like it." I leaned up and kissed him softly. He kissed back.

"But it's annoying." He stopped kissing me, and I couldn't hold back an aggravated growl. "I'm tired of doing this." He kissed me hastily, and I let my eyes close. "I want to do something that will mean more. I want you." He kissed me again, this time hesitantly.

"So take me," I said willingly. He pulled away from me and stared at me hard.

"You know I can't do that," he said. "The Organization forbids any relationships as it is; if I took it any step further, they'd know and get rid of me." I felt like a child who had been scolded by his mom. I must have shown my hurt too, because he smiled softly and pulled me close to him. I buried my face into his neck.

"Then we'll leave," I told him. "We can run, and they couldn't do a thing." Axel pulled away and gave me that look again.

"They'd kill you for sure," he said strictly. "Don't you dare try that stunt on them. If you leave, I'd have to come with you, and then they'd be breathing down my neck as well." He leaned in and kissed me. "What we're doing is taboo already."

"Then when we have hearts…" I kissed him again. "…we can do whatever we want."

We returned after that, and then he had to leave for his mission to Castle Oblivion. I hadn't seen him since, and just today I got the news of the "accident," as they're calling it. I stared at the wall in front of me, closing my eyes. I heard my door open slowly, and I growled.

"Xion, go back to your room!" I hissed sharply. I didn't have time for whatever she had to say or wanted to talk about. But she ignored me. I felt the bed dip underneath her weight and glared through my lids. "Xion, I said…!" I turned over, surprised to see green-apple eyes looking down at me, and tanned lips pulled into a smirk at my shocked face.

"The name isn't 'Xion,'" that sultry voice purred, "it's 'Axel.' Got it memorized?" I was speechless, but there wasn't much of a use for words as he bent down and kissed me, softly at first, before he began to kiss me like he really meant it. My arms wrapped around his neck, pulling his lips closer and deepening it. He tilted his head, deepening it to the point where I was about to see stars from lack of air. I didn't want to pull away, but he was stronger than me, and he broke us apart.

"I…I thought you were dead," I whispered, panting. He frowned.

"Give me more credit than that, Roxas," he replied, licking my lips. "I wouldn't die that easily. And besides, I wasn't in on the mission entirely. The members double-crossed each other. So, I killed who I could and high-tailed it out of there." He kissed me before I could ask any questions. I pulled my head to the side so I could speak. After I gathered my breath, I looked up at him. His eyes were gleaming with lust.

"W-What are you doing?" I asked breathlessly. "You try anything, and they'll kick us – ah!" Axel had bent down and bitten my neck while I was trying to talk. "D-Dammit, Axel…" He laughed before leaning down to my ear and exhaling deeply. I shivered, feeling his breath hot on my skin.

"Let's get outta here, Roxas," he said huskily, taking my hand. He pushed up and off me, straddling me on his knees. "I'm tired of being here."

He didn't have to tell me twice. I jumped up and pulled my coat on. He stood and waited for me. When I was dressed, he wrapped his arms around my waist, kissing my neck as he pushed me through a portal. I hadn't expected to hit a bed and fall backwards.

"Y-You were planning this, weren't you?" I asked as he kissed and bit at my neck. He chuckled, and that was really all the answer I needed. I gasped as his thigh pressed against me, and Axel took this opportunity to slip his tongue past my lips. I groaned as I felt that tight pull in my chest and the wet flesh move around my mouth.

Slowly, I felt the zipper of my coat being pulled down. I opened my eyes and pulled away from him. He studied me carefully.

"A-Are we going to go that far…?" I asked. He leaned forward and kissed me.

"You won't feel any pain, I promise," he said, kissing my eyes as I closed them. I relaxed back to the bed as he kissed down to my lips and to my neck. I groaned from the back of my throat as he removed my coat. I slipped my arms out and wrapped them around his neck. His hands slid up my shirt slowly, sensually, the hot tips leaving an ice-cold trail on my skin when they moved.

"Ah!" My shirt was torn into pieces and his tongue began exploring across my torso. I could feel his body heat radiating from his inside his clothes.

He rid me of my remaining clothes and threw off his own in a quick flash before grinding his hips down onto mine. I nearly screamed from the heat that flashed through my body. He kissed my neck, chest, shoulders, and moved to kiss me on the lips. I threw my arms around his torso, bucking against him. He released my mouth and slowly trailed down my stomach. I squirmed. It felt so weird. I had never gone this far before, and in all honesty, I was nervous.

"Relax," Axel purred, kissing my thigh. "It won't hurt."

I gasped loudly and gripped the sheets tightly in my fists as Alex slowly licked me and then took me in whole. I cried as his tongue teased me, heat running through my legs and tightening my muscles. I groaned, trying to hold back a moan that was threatening to break from the back of my throat. I clenched the bed sheets in my fists; it felt as if my lungs had closed off.

"A…Axel," I moaned, even through I had tried to fight it off. I could hear him chuckling, and the vibrations nearly blacked me out.

I covered my eyes with my arms, hoping that maybe the darkness would help me keep a hold of my sanity. It really didn't help much, considering my weaker sense helped tune up my others, and the heat's temperature rose. I could feel even the tiniest movements, and my body turned on to it.

"S-Sto… Axel…" He listened to me, to my surprise, and lifted away. He didn't get very far before I felt a small stroke, making my jerk my hips against him. A bead of sweat rolled down my cheek, and a hot, wet muscle reached out and licked it away. Axel smirked down at me, his tongue poking out the corner of his mouth.

"So persistent to stop, and you're the one that begged for it," he joked, biting down onto my collarbone. I gasped and gripped at his shoulder. "Relax, okay? This won't hurt."

Axel slipped two fingers into his mouth, coating them heavily with saliva, before moving down and capturing my mouth in a kiss. I didn't realize what he had been doing until I felt something weird probe into me and squirmed. The probe moved back and forth, which was slightly uncomfortable.

"Ssh, calm down, Roxy." Axel kissed my lips again. "Don't think about it; relax."

It was so much easier for him to say that rather than for me to do it. But despite the uncomfortable probing that increased, I relaxed and kissed Axel frantically. He returned it with as much passion, chuckling when I tensed. The probe stretched and opened me up. I growled and dug my nails into Axel's shoulders. He didn't seem to mind as he removed the probe and kissed me one more time, before his hands grabbed my hips.

"Relax," he whispered against my forehead. His breath was hot, steamy, and I could have just drifted away in the position he was holding me in. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, pulling his fire-hot flesh to mine, sweat glistening on both our skins. He licked over my throat, biting on my Adam's apple, kissing anywhere he could.

Something else replaced the probe, something larger. I grimaced as it moved inwards sharply. Axel was gritting his teeth together, panting, kissing me to distract me. Axel wriggled his hips, moving away before slamming against me harshly. Something in my body reacted to the movement, and I nearly went blind from whatever had been struck. I groaned loudly from the contact, and Axel froze, worry crossing over his face in thinking that he might have done something wrong. I gasped and let out a heavy breath.

"D-Do that again," I asked him.

"What, this?"

There was a mocking tone in his voice and it showed when he repeated the same action as before, nearly blinding me once again. I dug my nails into his shoulders.

He was a dirty liar in saying that it wouldn't hurt. It hurt like all hell at first. I couldn't help but groan and grimace. But as the pace he was going sped up, the pain was replaced with a feeling that made my skin feel like I was drowning in heat. I could barely see anything from the pleasure that invaded my bloodstream, and Axel's movements weren't helping me at all. His hands were roaming over my body, feeling everything they could and wiping sweat over any area that wasn't already wet. I felt another jolt of electricity rush through me when Axel wrapped his slim fingers around my arousal, moving his hand in time with his hips. I groaned loudly.

"A-Axel..." I licked my lips.

Something curled in my stomach. It felt like someone had taken my stomach, balled it up like a piece of paper, and shoved it down into me.

Lips pressed against mine, moving in intricate patterns that I struggled to follow as my vision turned white. I nearly screamed as the coil burst and the heat ran out with it. Axel followed me in his own release, grinding his hips into mine and groaning. I felt something shoot into me, warm and sticky, and then Axel collapsed on top of me, breathing heavily and gasping. My arms were locked tightly around him. The heat of lasted all but two seconds before being quickly extinguished. Axel nuzzled into my neck.

"You're finally mine," he breathed, squeezing his arms beneath me and taking my waist in his arms.

"I've always been yours," I said back with a laugh.

"But now you can't deny it." He sat up and looked down at me. "So don't."

"I never have."

Axel dipped down and kissed me again. I'd have to return to the Organization in the morning, but at least I wouldn't be dissatisfied.