I was so tired. Tired of life, tired of Voldemort, tired of school, tired of everyone's fucking expectations. I was tired of the stupid nightmares that robbed me of sleep, so that I felt like a zombie most of the time. I was tired of having to be strong, of having to know I would lead and be a hero for the rest of my life.
I woke up screaming, again. The other boys barely turned over, so I guess my silencing spell held. I was drenched with sweat and my blood throbbed as I heard his laughter in my eyes. I felt like I was suffocating under the pressures of my own mine.
Air! I needed air! Ah, the blessings of an invisibility cloak. I slipped out of bed and into some clothes, putting on the cloak and disappearing into the night.
I don't know how long I sat there, staring at the stars from the top of the Astronomy Tower, wishing I could sleep with some peace, wishing I could live with some peace. But, those two things were things that destiny had taken from me. What a bitch. It wasn't fair. "It's not fair." I announced into the night.
"No, it's not fair." A male voice answered me quietly. Quiet or not, when a voice answers you back in the middle of the night when you're supposed to be alone, you freak out. Or at least, I do – and did.
"What the fu- Malfoy." My query was answered as I spun around, seeing the blond traitor leaning against the other balcony. I narrowed my eyes, wand clutched tightly, waiting for him to strike. But then he did something I didn't expect. He laughed.
And laughed, and laughed. The bastard was still chuckling as my glare intensified while he finally choked out some words, "You really didn't know I was here, Potter? I've been here since you burst through the door looking as shitty as Granger post-OWL's."
Relieved he didn't hex me, I remembered how tired I actually was, and said simply, bereft of venom, "Shut up, Malfoy."
Miracle of miracles, he shut up. It was minutes later when he said a phrase which I would have previously associated with the world ending, "You're right, you know."
The disbelief must have showed on my face even through the dark as he clarified, "About it not being fair. Life isn't fair, for either of us. Destiny's a bitch."
I nearly laughed at that, but instead just said, "Yeah."
"So why do you look so much more atrocious than usual?" the prat continued.
"I'm tired." I answered shortly, not bothering to wonder why I hadn't left the moment I realized he was present.
"Can't sleep?" He asked.
"No." I admitted.
"Me either."he said, surprising me. "There's too much damn pressure, probably for both of us, huh?"
"Yeah." I said, shocked that he felt similarly, and shocked that he was being civil. It was too much, and I turned my back to him, dropping my head to rest it on the railing.
"What's really wrong, Potter?" He asked, all of a sudden standing right next to me, close enough that I could feel his body heat.
"Why do you give a damn? You've done nothing but bug the shit out of me for years. What's with the caring act now?" I demanded, still not looking at me.
"I don't know why, except that I do want to know, Potter, and I do want a real answer." He answered, disarming me completely with a gentle tone of voice.
"What if I fail?" I blurted out of nowhere, looking into his eyes now. "What if I fail and everyone fucking dies, and Voldemort wins? I have to live with that every day; I can't even sleep with him in my head. And I'm just so tired."
Malfoy looked at me, and all of a sudden it occurred to me that his grey eyes actually looked soft. Not pitying, but compassionate. "Then sleep, Potter." He murmured. And I saw a flash of blue light, then darkness.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Light woke me up, bright light. Which was odd, because I always slept with the curtains on my bed closed. I blinked, opening my eyes, then sat up so fast my head rushed as I realized I was lying on a charmed-warm sofa, on the Astronomy tower. I felt amazing, as if I'd actually slept for a change, without nightmares. Then I noticed - there was a piece of paper on top of my lap, with one line on it.
"Hopefully now you won't be as tired."