WARNING: THIS DRABBLE CONTAINS SPOILERS.
IF YOU ARE NOT CAUGHT UP IN THE SERIES DO. NOT. READ. THIS.
It's just a little something that I've been thinking about writing since the mid-season finale.
I'm not sure if I'll continue it or not, as I have another fic going right now as well
(You should totally read it.. js)
BUT if you like this and think I should continue it, leave it in the reviews!
Bellamy breathes in the crisp morning air as he stands quietly on watch. His guard shift started a little over an hour ago and though it had been freezing, the sun was beginning to kiss the horizon and with it came a hope of warmth. It's been a week since the truce with the Grounders was made. Probably the longest week of his life. He often warred with himself when he was sitting in the mess hall watching her.
Clarke never approached him, so he had decided to give her some space. She sits alone almost every day, her head low and never making eye contact with anyone. Especially Raven. Bellamy knew she was right, for killing Finn. If she hadn't done it, well, the poor guy would've been subjected to horrible, endless torture. Clarke was right, but Bellamy had no words of comfort for her. He was never good with words of comfort unless it came to Octavia. This… this was a whole new playing field.
He hears movement behind him and doesn't even glance over his shoulder.
"No one is supposed to be outside the gates." His voice is deep and hard, his guard voice.
"I know. I can't sleep. Wanted to see the sunrise." Her voice propels him around to face her. She has dark circles under her eyes and the haunted look in her eyes makes his chest ache.
"Clarke," he starts, swinging his rifle over his shoulder to rest across his back.
"Please don't, Bellamy." She sounds tired, so very tired. "I just want to watch the sunrise." He nods and they both turn back towards the east. The cold air is a sign that the winter months are on their way and the entire camp is preparing for it in all ways possible. Silence folds around them as the sun makes its debut above the earth and he can't help but glance sideways at her.
"Stop it." She says with a hint of her old command. "I wish people would stop staring at me."
"Clarke," he tries again, fumbling for the words he wishes he could share with her, something that would ease her mind. "You did the right thing." Unfortunately, his words fall short of the sentiment he was trying to get across. Though when she finally faces him, she has tears in her eyes, clearly his words had some kind of effect on her.
"I killed him, Bellamy. He's never coming back to us." He can see the hysteria rising in her eyes and her breath comes rapidly until she is clutching at her chest, practically gasping for air. "He's dead because of me. He killed those people for me, and now he's dead."
Without a second thought, Bellamy reaches out and envelopes her in his arms. She is sobbing into his chest and speaking but Bellamy can't understand anything she is saying through the tears.
"It's okay," he says, running his hand lightly over her hair. "It was better for him this way." Bellamy isn't sure if the rattling in his bones comes from her sobs or if he is shaking. Finn had never been Bellamy's favorite person, not with his superior attitude from the time they got to earth and his anti-war way of thinking, but he did consider him a friend nonetheless. Especially within these last few weeks. After all, they were all one big, dysfunctional family of delinquents. He'd be lying if he said that Finn's death didn't rest heavily on him, but it was nowhere near the weight that Clarke has been carrying around on her shoulders.
"I should have tried harder for a different option," she mutters finally, her tears dried against Bellamy's chest. "I shouldn't have let him split us up at the drop ship."
"You couldn't know that he was planning to give himself up."
"It was such a typical Finn move, Bellamy. We all should have known." She laughs, actually laughs, softly. "He was such an idiot."
"Yeah…" Bellamy presses his lips against the top of her head. "But he was our idiot. You did the right thing." He repeats.
"Yeah," she sighs. "I should get back inside." Before she leaves, she turns back to him, fixing her blood shot eyes on his dark ones. "Thank you, Bellamy. For everything. I'm glad I didn't lose all of my friends last week."
"Raven will come around, Clarke. You'll see… she'll see." She takes her leave and Bellamy can do nothing but watch as she disappears inside the gates. He wants to follow her, but unfortunately his watch is not up. He will find her later, he promises himself.