Disclaimer: No, they're not mine. I wish they were, but they're not.

THE PERFECT CURE

"Roger!" Collins called loudly. "I'm not gonna tell you any more times. Get up now!"

"You know," Benny said without looking up from the business section, "it might be easier if you would just rise from your chair, walk over to Roger's door, open said door and wake him up from there."

"And waste my energy on him? I don't think so," Collins said, taking a sip of his coffee. He was leaning backwards in his chair, carefully balancing it on just two legs and resting his feet on the table. "Mr Davis!" he yelled. "This is your last warning!"

A thump was heard from inside Roger's door, sounding much like a shoe hitting the door with some force.

"Well, at least he's awake now," Collins said contentedly.

Benny rose to get more orange juice from the fridge. On his way there he shoved Collins' feet off the table, causing the other man's chair to topple forward, and Collins yelped as he narrowly avoided spilling coffee in his lap.

"Hey! Watch it!"

"You shouldn't keep your feet on the table," Benny said as he poured the juice. "It's not hygienic."

"Sorry mum," Collins said, widened his eyes and pouted, looking very much like a five-year-old. "I'll never, ever, ever do it again."

Benny just rolled his eyes in reply. The door to Mark and Maureen's bedroom opened and Mark shuffled out, dressed in a T-shirt and pyjama pants. His hair was tousled, there was a red mark on his left cheek, indicating which side he'd been sleeping on and he was rubbing his eyes with one hand.

"What's the story, morning glory?" Collins said.

Mark walked over to Benny, leaning into his roommate and putting his head on Benny's shoulder.

"Isn't there a law against being that chipper this early in the morning?" he mumbled hoarsely.

"It's nine, Mark, it's not that early," Benny said while rubbing Mark's back soothingly.

"It feels early," Mark muttered and left Benny's side to sit down at the table. He put his elbows on the table and rested his head in his hands. Collins looked closely at him.

"Are you ok?" he asked. "I could hear you coughing last night, and you look a bit pale."

"I'm fine," Mark said and smiled a little. "Just tired."

"That's good then," Collins said. He rose from his chair and stretched his arms over his head. "We don't want our baby boy to get sick."

"I wish you'd stop calling me that," Mark mumbled.

"Well, you are the youngest," Collins explained.

"So, it would be alright then if I'd start calling you Grandpa, since you're the oldest?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because I can kick your ass and you know it."

"Benny, Collins is mean," Mark whined.

"Collins, quit being mean to Mark," Benny said in a voice that indicated that he'd said the same things hundred times before. He poured a cup of coffee and put it in front of Mark. "Maybe this can wake you up," he said, sat down and picked up the business section again. Mark took the mug in his hands and inhaled the scent deeply.

"I love you," he told Benny earnestly.

Benny laughed.

"God, I wish everyone was as easy as you."

"Roger!" Collins pounded on Roger's door. "You better be decent, because I'm coming in!"

He opened the door and went in. After sound of a brief struggle, a muttered curse and a loud "What the fuck are you doing?" from Roger, he came out again, dragging an angry looking Roger behind him.

"We're off," he informed Benny and Mark as he pulled Roger through the front door. "See you later." The door closed. Silence reigned for all of seven seconds. Then Mark blew his nose loudly.

"I'm sick," he announced.

"You just told Collins you were fine," Benny said without looking up.

"Well, I can't very well complain to him, can I?" Mark said. "He's got HIV and he never so much as mentions it. I can't whine about a cold to him."

"Mark," Benny said seriously and looked him in the eyes. "There is something I have to tell you. I've got leukaemia."

Mark reached over the table and punched Benny's arm, hard.

"Don't say stuff like that!" he said hotly.

"Ow." Benny rubbed the soar spot. "It was just a joke." He saw Mark's glare and sighed. "You're right, it wasn't funny. I'm sorry. But do I have to listen to your whining?"

"Yes."

"Don't you have a girlfriend around here somewhere? I think she would be a more appropriate victim."

"Maureen's in L.A., remember? At that performance artists convention thing."

"L.A.?" Benny raised his eyebrows. "How the hell did she afford that?"

Mark shrugged.

"Oh." Benny smirked. "Let me guess, you paid?"

"She really wanted to go," Mark said.

Benny laughed.

"You are so whipped!"

"Well, at least I have a girlfriend," Mark said, not even bothering to deny Benny's statement. "As opposed to the rest of you losers living here."

"Yeah, I'm sure Collins is really jealous," Benny said.

Mark opened his mouth to reply but instead started to cough violently. Benny eyed him carefully.

"Uh huh, I won't feel sorry for you." But when Mark couldn't seem to stop coughing he reluctantly pushed his glass of orange juice over to Mark who gratefully emptied it.

"Ouch!" he said, gasping for breath. "My whole chest hurts."

Benny stubbornly kept reading the paper. Mark glared at him.

"Hey! Some sympathy would be nice."

"Sympathy never cured a cold."

"Nothing cures a cold," Mark sniffed dramatically. "I'm doomed to eternal misery."

Benny sighed.

"I thought Maureen was the drama queen. Don't be such a baby, there's plenty of ways to cure a cold."

"Like what?" Mark asked and blew his nose again.

"Drinking hot water with honey and lemon, garlic, a hot bath, I don't know! I'm not a nurse."

Mark rose from his chair and then grabbed the back of it tightly.

"Whoa! Dizzy!" He gingerly walked over to the fridge and opened it. "Hmm," he inspected the contents closely. "Well, the hot water with honey and lemon would have to be hot water with honey and lemon without the honey and lemon. That's not quite as effective, is it?"

"I doubt it," Benny said, turning the page.

"What else did you say? Garlic? What am I supposed to do with that? Am I supposed to cook something with garlic in it? Because let me tell you, I really don't feel like eating right now. And even if I wanted to eat, I don't think I could, because I can't swallow. My throat is all swollen and stuff and it really hurts." Mark paused to blow his nose. "God, where does all this snot come from? Anyway, or am I supposed to eat the garlic, like, raw, which would just be disgusting, and I don't even like garlic that much to start with, and just imagine the breath I would get!"

"That wouldn't be such a huge change," Benny said.

"What?" Mark turned sharply and then closed his eyes until the room had stopped spinning. "Are you saying I got bad breath?" he asked worriedly. "I don't, do I? Do I? Maureen would have said something, surely. Benny! Say something, do I really have bad breath."

"No, you don't." Benny sighed. "It was just a joke. You smell like morning dew on roses, Mark." He didn't get an answer. "Mark?" He finally lifted his eyes from the paper and saw Mark leaning against the kitchen sink, forehead pressed against the cupboard above it. "Mark!" Benny quickly rose and went over to his friend who was breathing heavily and gripping the kitchen sink so hard his knuckles were turning white.

"So dizzy," he whispered with closed eyes.

Benny put one hand on Mark's neck and gasped.

"God, you're burning up! Why didn't you say anything?"

"I told you I was sick," Mark muttered.

"Yes, but… oh, I'm sorry," Benny said as he pried Mark's fingers away from the sink. He put Mark's arm over his shoulder and his own arm around Mark's waist. "Come on, we need to get you into bed."

The few steps to Mark's bedroom took a lot longer than usual since Mark stumbled on every step. But after a few minutes he was safely tucked into bed.

"I'll go get you something to drink," Benny said.

Mark quickly captured Benny's hand in his own.

"Don't go."

Benny raised one eyebrow.

"What?"

"Don't go," Mark smiled embarrassed. "I hate being alone when I'm sick."

"I'll just be in the kitchen."

"I know. I know, but," Mark gripped Benny's hand tighter. "Just stay, for a while. Please?"

Benny shrugged and sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Sure." He brushed away a strand of hair from Mark's forehead and smiled. "If you want me to."

Mark started to cough again. His whole body shook, and when he was done and looked up at Benny he had tears in his eyes.

"I feel like shit," he said pitifully, reached for a paper tissue and blew his nose loudly. "It hurts."

"I know," Benny said compassionately. "Do you want me to kiss it better?"

A smile slowly spread on Mark's face.

"Yes."

Benny frowned.

"Uh, no. That was a joke, Mark, not an offer. I don't make a habit out of kissing my friends."

Mark pouted.

"You've kissed Collins," he stated.

"I was drunk! Besides, he kissed me first. I think."

"You've kissed Maureen."

"Again, I was drunk! Please don't bring that up again, I've apologised for that so many times. I didn't know she was your girlfriend!"

"You've kissed Roger."

"I was very drunk that time! And he gave me a black eye, so that's not exactly one of my fondest memories."

Mark chewed thoughtfully on his lower lip.

"So what you're saying is that I have to get you drunk if I want you to kiss me?"

"What?" Benny spluttered. "Why would you want me to kiss you?"

"Well, you've kissed everyone else," Mark said, looking a bit sad. "I don't like being left out."

Benny stared at him.

"You're sick. You've got a fever, and you're obviously delirious."

"Also, you're cute," Mark added, cocking his head and studying Benny intently.

"Mark, I'm not going to kiss you," Benny said slowly.

"Fine then," Mark huffed and closed his eyes, but didn't let go of Benny's hand. He shivered slightly and pulled the cover tighter around him.

Benny looked at him a long time.

"Are you cold?" he asked finally.

Mark nodded.

"I'll fetch my cover, then." The grip on his hand became almost painfully hard, and Mark opened one eye and smiled slyly.

"Body heat is so much more effective," he said.

Benny burst out laughing and shook his head.

"You're incredible!"

"Thank you."

"Do you want me to get sick too? Is that it?"

"Of course I don't," Mark said. "But you're not contagious anymore, after you actually get sick. My mum said so."

"Since when do you listen to what your mum says?" Benny said and sighed when Mark lifted up the cover invitingly. "Mark, you have a girlfriend, remember?"

"She's in L.A. all week, surrounded by people just like her," Mark said seriously. "Do you really think that she's being faithful to me?"

"Yes," Benny lied, but then he saw the dejected expression on Mark's face and sighed again. "If I get into bed with you, do you promise not to bug me about kissing you?"

Mark nodded.

"Cross my heart and hope to die."

"Fine then," Benny grumbled and crawled in under the cover. "Just for a little while."

A swift motion for Mark's side, and Benny suddenly found himself lying under Mark, staring up into Mark's brightly smiling face.

"That's better," Mark said. He crossed his arms on Benny's chest and laid his head down.

Benny tried to move, but to no avail.

"Mark! Get off me! You're heavy. How did you do that? You're sick, you're supposed to be weak."

Mark snorted.

"I could have double pneumonia, and I'd still be stronger than you, skinny boy." He coughed again.

"You're getting germs all over me," Benny protested.

"I already told you I'm not contagious anymore. Don't worry." Mark wiggled his body a bit. "This is nice. Very comfortable."

"Not for me," Benny said, not willing to admit to himself that it was kind of nice to have a warm solid body covering him.

Mark looked at him closely and then leaned down and pressed his lips against Benny's quickly. He lifted his head again and smiled. Benny stared blankly at him.

"You promised not to do that."

"Yes," Mark admitted. "I'm such a horrible person."

"You…" Benny started but as soon as he opened his mouth, Mark kissed him again. "Mffll," he tried to protest but quieted when he felt Mark's warm and oh so talented tongue slip into his mouth. He tried to resist at first, but didn't remember why he should. So he leaned back and let himself enjoy the kiss, bringing one hand up to let his fingers thread through Mark's hair. Then Mark abruptly ended the kiss and turned away.

"What?" Benny said confusedly. "What's wrong?"

"My nose is running," Mark explained and blew his nose. "I don't want to get snot all over you, do I?"

Benny made a face.

"Ew, that's so gross."

Mark turned back and smiled.

"But it was a nice kiss, right?"

"Yes," Benny reluctantly admitted. "It was a very nice kiss. Are you happy now?"

Mark pursed his lips thoughtfully.

"Not quite," he said and leaned closer. "I think we might need to do it once more."

"Just once?" Benny mumbled against Mark's lips.

"Or twice," Mark shivered as Benny licked his lower lip. "Or a hundred…"

* * * * *

Collins and Roger came back three hours later.

"I hate shopping with you," Roger declared as he tried to close the door while balancing four bags of groceries in his arms. "You always get the most disgusting things, like soy beans and tofu, and I don't know what. Why can't you just eat meat like normal persons?"

"Because it's not good for your body," Collins answered and placed his own three bags on the table. "You should try to eat a bit more healthy. A diet consisting of nothing but pizza can't be very nutritious." He looked around. "Where's Mark and Benny? They weren't going anywhere today, were they?"

"Not that I know," Roger said.

"I'm a bit worried about Mark, actually," Collins said. "I think he's sick, he just doesn't want to admit it. Did you hear him coughing last night? It sounded pretty nasty."

"Um…" was all Roger could say. He was standing in Mark's doorway, staring into the room. "Um…"

"What?" Collins walked over to him, looked into the room and laughed.

Mark and Benny were sound asleep in the bed, heads resting closely together. Benny had his hand in Mark's hair, and Mark's leg was wrapped around Benny's waist.

"Well," Collins said slowly. "If he was sick, it looks like he found the perfect cure."

The End